by J. E. Mann
“See that hole right there?” Jake followed in slowly behind me, “Yea, what about it?” He had a look of disgust on his face.
“Can you get in there and see if we missed anything?” My femininity rushed in, I wasn’t about to put my hands in there.
“You want me to put my hand… in that? What if there’s a snake in there?” Jake was not usually the type to turn down a request I had and he rarely brought up snakes, his very real irrational fear.
“Snakes, really Jake? There are no snakes in a restaurant drain!” I had a sour look on my face, “Just get in there and look.” I wasn’t about to budge on looking in that awful hole.
Jake leaned across the table his coat acting as a barrier between him and the leftover human mess. “ah Rach, what if there’s a lava snake down here?” He was being so whiny; his comments were actually quite comical so I opted not to even saying anything.
He began to dig in the grill’s drain and he let out many expletives and showed every facial expression known to man while he did. I didn’t really want to to see what he was going to pull out. After a few minutes, Jake dragged his body closer in to the center of the grill. He investigated something further down inside.
“Got something Jake?” he certainly had my attention if he was working hard enough to grab what he had found down below. I grabbed a pair of gloves and a bag from my coat pocket, the items I had grown accustomed to carrying around all of the time.
With a sound of disgust, Jake pulled his now goopy arm out from the drain in front of him and he shook off the contents of what he was holding.
“Yup right, here, you’re goanna like this.” he was monotone, a rarity for Jake.
I held out the bag in front of me not wanting to get any closer than I had to. He dropped the contents in to the bag and I closed it quickly. I meshed the bag with my hands and saw the item inside was a key.
“Where do you think it goes Jake?” he shrugged in my direction throwing off his coat he was displeased with me. He wrung his hands. The downside was that we couldn’t disturb anything inside of the restaurant until it was cleared. Jake would have to just wait to get cleaned up, and I realized I had no way to protect the car from his nastiness.
JAKE
“I’m telling you it’s an original. The key to the restaurant in my hands.” My voice was getting louder and louder.
“It’s not an original Jake. All of the keys have been accounted for,” Rodriguez was getting angry too. I had called him, ready to rub his nose in our find. Two hours later he had called me to say that Joshua had claimed eight keys and all were accounted for. Unbelievable, there had to be a mistake.
“I have taken this key to four locksmiths. All four have told me it’s not a copy, its original.”
“Eight keys, all accounted four Jake.”
I stood up and began pacing. “You’ve seen the keys? With your own eyes? You line them up on that little desk of yours and count them. Or expecting you to count up to eight is asking too much?”
No answer. I looked at the phone and the call ended message.
“Hang up? You don’t hang up on me.” I started hitting redial. “I’ll take a match and burn that whole department down!” I put the phone to my ear. Rach was looking at me with a smile.
“May I ask what you’re smiling at?”
“I was remembering this article I read about males and how their emotional maturity is tied directly to the size of their intermittent organ.”
“I don’t know what that is, but I don’t like your tone.” A receptionist answered. “Yes Detective Rodriguez please, thank you.” I said pleasantly. Music came out of the phone. “No manners at all. Thinks he’s better than everyone else.”
Rach leaned forward. “Jake I’m worried about your health. You’re blood pressure specifically.”
“My blood pressure is fine, I got it checked at the grocery store.” The music stopped and Mr. Manners himself got on the line.
“Are you ready to be civil now,” he asked.
I tried to keep my voice calm and level. “Can you please send over a list of every employee who had access to those keys? A complete list of everyone in the restaurant would be better. And ask Mr. Buckstone if his key is part of the eight.”
“I can do that.”
“Oh and Detective? Rach has discovered something else, something that might solve this whole mess. I’ll put her on the phone and… Hold on, another call.” Pause. “Rodriguez, I’ll have to call you back.”
“Wait Jake what did Rachel…?
I pushed the end call button and placed the phone on the desk. Rach looked at me quizzical.
“What did I find out exactly?”
I sat down across from her. “Oh you talked to a psychic who saw Jeffery Dammer rise out of his grave and commit the crimes. He changed his hair color, but you’re pretty sure you can find him.”
“Why exactly do you hate Ben so much?”
I waved my hand. “He’s ok for a cop. Just irritates me sometimes.” I pointed behind her at the white board. “Now this person I hate. Mostly because he is so damn good about covering his tracks.”
Rach swiveled in her chair and looked at the board. As of this morning we had five suspects. Joining Gloria Calloway, Joshua, James Buckstone, and Steve Ellis was Randy Timmons, our second victim’s husband. He had cried huge tears when told of his wife’s murder. Those tears had quickly dried up when the subject of his wife being a client of a dating site. After thirty minutes, he had confessed that he and his wife had recently separated, but he had been hopeful of reconciliation. Little chance of that now, I thought.
“If Gloria and Randy found out their spouses were cheating on them with each other, “Rach began, “Maybe they got together and formed a murder pact. The main problem is how did they get into the restaurant?”
“The key.”
“Right, but how did they get the key? Randy works at a bank and Gloria was a stay at home wife and mother. If they stole it, they must be more skilled then they appear. Or there is a third party who helped them. Either one could have killed by themselves, but still why choose the restaurant?’
“James and Joshua had access to the restaurant. But why kill those two people? Maybe James had his eye on Sarah and Steve swooped in and took her. James snaps, kills Steve, and decided to hurt daddy by putting the body into the restaurant.”
Rach studied the pic of James. “Maybe, but why dump Sarah in an alleyway? No connection to the restaurant there.”
“I know, I know.” I rubbed my eyes. “God, it’s like trying to make one picture out of two sets of jigsaw puzzles. One group had motive, but no opportunity. The other group had opportunity, but no motive.”
“If it were easy Jake, we would be out of a job.”
I grunted. Rach pointed at the smiling face of Donald Ellis. “What group would you put him into?” she asked.
“Opportunity. He knew both victims. He might be all about discretion and secrecy, but he would know where they lived. Credit cards and checks have to be approved with a billing address.”
“Why kill them?”
I shook my head. I had no answer. “What about the removal of hearts? Wouldn’t we need a doctor of some sort?
“All the information could be found on the internet. Or a textbook.”
We were silent as we scanned the faces of the potential murderers. Maybe the killer was looking back at us, maybe not. I looked back at Rach.
“You know what would clear some of this up?”
“Another body.”
That thought made me feel sick. I was done talking. I stood and stretched. “What time do you have?”
Rach checked her watch. It was new, a present from James perhaps? “1:30.”
“Common. You and I are going to get out for a little while. Do some real detective work.”
Rach stood and picked up her coat. ‘Where are we going?”
I pointed at the white board. “To see what Don there does when he’s not helping
people find their soul mates. A nice little tail and stakeout job.”
Rach was putting on her coat. “You never let me come on your stakeouts.”
“This one is special. Someone is hijacking vital organs and you and I need to stop them. I think we might be the only ones that can.”
“What about the police?”
I held up my phone. “Notice how it’s been ten minutes and Rodriguez hasn’t called back? Wouldn’t you if someone had told you they had a big clue? He probably thinks he knows what it is. Sloppy work like that won’t save the day. It’s up to you and your trusty sidekick to save the day. Quick, to the Rachmobile, away!”
“So we’re taking my car then?”
I smiled. “Your car seats are comfier then mine.”
RACHEL
Driving had turned in to a chore with Jake in the car. He knew every turn I needed to make and chatted idly about stores I had passed a million times every day. I just ignored his excitement about the new stakeout he wanted to do. I had never been invited to go before and probably for good reasons, I didn’t even know where to start with procedure.
I turned off on to a side street away from the local clubs and businesses that were in full swing, Jake had me slow and stop the car in between street lights so we could hide. He took of his seat belt and stretched in all of the available space on his side.
“So what now?” I cut the engine, “How do we know Don will even be here?”
“We don’t. Not exactly, I just have a suspicion and I’ve been watching him in my own time. I keep up with people too.”
“Right.” I didn’t like the answer he had given me but he proceeded to pull out a magazine he had grabbed from my house and started to read.
Not even twenty minutes had passed before I was bored. There was nothing for me to do just sitting there in the car. I fumbled around in the floorboard attempting to slide my shoes off. If Jake could be comfortable then so was I.
“What are you doing?” Jake said from the side of his magazine. “Getting comfortable, it appears that we will be here for a while.”
“Not a good idea,” was all he said before returning to his reading. “And why not?”
“What if we have to go after the guy? We need to be ready Rach.” I sighed loudly before putting my shoes on. There was little to no activity at Don’s office and I was sure this would turn out to be a bust.
A few more minutes passed and I had seen enough, “Ugh I’m so bored!” I called out with my arms smacking the steering wheel. The horn sounded as my hands landed, Jake nearly jumped out of his seat turning to me. “What the hell was that about? Are you trying to draw attention to us?” He was almost yelling at me with a look of embarrassment on his face.
Laughter and shock bolted through me, I looked at Jake wide eyed, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! It was an accident, I swear!” I twiddled my thumbs after Jake had calmed down enough to return to his seat. Even he was bored, he had resorted to chewing his nails near the window. I started to play with the automatic window rolling it up and down, anything to avoid the clock staring back at me.
“Rach! Stop!” Jake had leaped across the cab at me, frustration in his voice.
“What? Why?”
“You’re going to draw attention to us, just sit still—and—well, do nothing.”
“That’s not going to happen Jake! I’m so bored, isn’t the office closed yet?” I pouted at him wishing he would have just come by himself.
Suddenly a tap at the passenger side door rang out and I thought Jake was going to explode. His window rolled down as he confronted the person on the other side, “What do you want man?”
A shaggy haired man bent down eye level with Jake, the smell was horrendous and I guessed the man to be drunk and homeless. He rested his knuckle gloves on the side of my car which reminded me to get it cleaned soon.
“Can—can I have some money?” He said with a slur. Jake’s fists clenched and he gritted his teeth before exhaling, “Here,” Jake handed the man a five dollar bill from his coat pocket, “now go.” The window suddenly started to roll up and the man walked away back in to the darkness.
“We can’t catch a break tonight can we?” He sighed, crossed his arms over his chest, and stared at Don’s office door like a dog waiting on a bone.
He looked poised and ready to tackle anyone leaving so I tried my luck, “Can I have your magazine?” He handed it over willingly with no argument and I was suddenly excited. Finally, I had something to do.
I flipped through the pages mostly looking at the pictures I could actually see in the dark and a bright redhead jumped off the page at me. “Wow, look at that hair!” I exclaimed to no one in particular. Jake fell from his trance and looked over my shoulder at the page.
“Yeah, that’s Eva, a new diva.”
“A diva? No one else here looks like that, why stand out so much?”
“They don’t choose Rach, the company does. You know if you look different then you make more money, it’s just how it works.”
“So what does she sing?” I continued to flip slowly through a few more of the pages of this Eva girl.
“Sing? She doesn’t sing!”
“But a Diva is traditionally an opera singer; this girl doesn’t look like she has a set of lungs at all!”
“She’s not a diva, it’s just what they call themselves, it’s like… it’s like…” Suddenly Jake snatched the magazine out of my hands and quickly fumbled through the pages in frustration.
He found what he was looking for when he folded the magazine cover backwards over itself, a huge pet peeve of mine, and handed it back to me. “Look a guy with no shirt on! Look at that for a few seconds!” He held the magazine a few centimeters in front of my nose, never making the point about divas clear.
Before me was a large two-page display of a very muscular man with tattoos that adorned both of his arms from shoulder to wrist. His arms were outstretched wide and at the bottom was a digitally enhanced name, Randy Orton. Across his face was a large smirk, one of entitlement like the world owed him something.
“See?” Jake said after a few moments of quiet, “Pretty isn’t he?” He was taunting me again, and still not making any valid points.
“Sure Jake, he is an attractive man, if you think peacocks are attractive.”
“What the hell do you mean peacocks?” Jake retracted the magazine throwing it in to his lap.
I knew wrestling was a fake sport, the company was very clear about letting the population know that they were an entertaining business only, but I liked seeing Jake frustrated. He never could quite follow my train of thought which humored me. Plus, we had nothing else to do but watch a silver framed door that no one was entering or exiting.
“Jake, look at this Orton guy, he’s showing similar displays of dominance just like a peacock would. His arms are stretched out wide, like tail feathers; he’s clearly showing everyone who the alpha male is.”
I folded my arms across my chest, satisfied with my answer and I waited.
“Well of course he is, he’s the champion and he’s got to show everyone who’s boss so nobody will mess with him.”
I hadn’t anticipated Jake to have an answer but I wasn’t done yet, “The eyes Jake, they tell the real story.”
With a scowl across Jakes face he muttered, “What about the eyes Rach?” He eyed me suspiciously.
“Those eyes are begging and pleading for love, he’s just a small boy who never got his father’s approval and just wants the crowd to love him.”
His eyes were huge after what I had said. Numbly he looked at me in silence for a good fifteen seconds. “I don’t believe this entire conversation! How about I destroy something you love? Did you know Albert Einstein only held fifteen patents instead of seventeen?” Jake was furious.
“Oh stuff it Jake! Einstein was a patent clerk; he technically held no patents at all.” He retreated further to his side to pout. Jake began to tap his pockets wildly, the urge to smoke was all over him
and I had really stressed him out. He was like an animal trying to escape the car.
“No, Jake, there will be absolutely no smoking in my car!” I was prepared to dump him on the side of the road if he disobeyed my order.
“I’m not going to smoke Rach, I’m going to get out of this car, calmly pick up a gallon of gasoline, douse myself and light myself on fire!”
I remained quiet for a few minutes; Jake severely needed to calm down, “You know, I think The Shield is going to break up.” He thought I was all hot air on the topic of wrestling until I gave him a platform to stand on.
With a sigh, or even a large breath of relief, Jake finally sat still, “The Shield can’t break up. They are the perfect stable. Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins go together way too perfectly for a split.”
“Let them go together, I’m not the one spoiling the romance.” I shrugged; I could care less about relationships.
“WHO’S TALKING ABOUT A ROMANCE?!” Jake was back to his breaking point, making me jump. He pointed a finger at me taking another breath to continue his rant, “YOU—,” His eyes went passed me to the office door, “Where’s Don’s car?”
We both sat staring toward the office and then up and down the street. We had let him escape during our silly conversation.
I opened my mouth with no good intention of saying anything helpful, “Well sh...”
JAKE
“Well shit!” Rach exclaimed. I pulled the handle and jumped out of the car. As I ran around to the driver’s side I banged on the door.
“Out, out,” I demanded. Rach got out, a question on her lips. I pointed to where I had just come from. In a few minutes, we had switched positions. I gunned the engine and peeled off down the street. Rach didn’t look well, in fact she looked scared.
“Where is the center of town?”
“The center, the center of…?”
“The center of town Rach, The place where you can easily get to all other areas.”
“That would be the movie theatre on Swift street.”
I nodded my head, taking a hard right. Rach grabbed the handle above the door, for what reason I had no idea.