by Sky Corgan
While I tried to imagine how our life would be together, my mind kept drifting back to Liam. He had looked so upset when I left. It was strange to be without him—without anyone that I knew from back home. Here in New York, I was completely alone. Jack and his family were all that I had now. It would be a hard thing to adjust to.
Tomorrow, Jack would return to his mansion, but I would be left at his parents' house. His parents were old-fashioned Christian Catholic and felt it was inappropriate for me to live with him before the wedding. I wasn't sure if I was happy about that or sad. From what the media had told of Jack, he had a ferocious sexual appetite. While I was sitting at home, denying Liam's advances and remaining celibate, Jack had been out living it up, dating supermodels and famous actresses.
Maybe it was better for me to stay with his parents. I was still a virgin and not sure if I was ready to be pressured into sex. Jack's parents had the right idea. I only ever wanted to sleep with one man in my entire life, and that would be my husband.
Yet at the same time, I couldn't help but feel that being parted from Jack left him open to invite other girls to his mansion without me knowing. While he seemed like a good guy, I didn't trust him on that front. He lived fast and carefree. Old habits wouldn't die easily, I was certain.
The night was restless, and after trying and failing to go to sleep for over two hours, I decided to get up and step outside. A breath of fresh air would probably do me some good.
As quiet as a mouse, I wrapped a robe around myself and tiptoed through the mansion to the top story living room which opened onto a balcony that overlooked the estate. The night breeze was fresh and crisp against my skin, cleansing me of my worries as I looked out across the fields and hills behind the Kemble estate.
“Couldn't sleep?” a voice stirred me, and I swirled around to see Jack walking towards me in nothing but a pair of sweat pants. The way they hung from his hips brought deliciously naughty thoughts to mind, and I felt ashamed of myself for even having them.
“No,” I replied, pulling the robe a bit tighter around me. “Between the flight and meeting you and meeting your parents. . . it's all just been a bit overwhelming for me.”
“That's understandable,” he said as he stepped up beside me, peering out into the darkness as if he was taking in the landscape for the first time.
“It's very beautiful out here.” I turned my gaze into the distance.
“Not as beautiful as you.” The smile in his voice was apparent.
It sounded like a cheesy line, but my cheeks still grew warm from the thought that he found me attractive. I sighed contently, unable to think of anything to say in reply.
“Are you looking forward to the wedding?” Jack asked.
“I suppose. It's still a ways off.”
“Yes, but it's best to prepare now. We're going to be married for a very long time.”
It was such a funny thing for him to say.
“The rest of our lives,” I added.
“Yes.” He sucked in a breath. “I need to be upfront with you. Being my wife isn't going to be easy.”
“I didn't think it would be.” I glanced at his suddenly serious expression.
“I wish that you would have come sooner. I have certain needs . . . as a man.”
Oh no, I thought, my mind racing with panic. Here's where he asks me if I want to have sex. What will I say? If I deny him, things will be awkward between us, but I can't just agree. What about what I want—my needs?
“There are certain things that I like to do in the bedroom, and I need to know that you'll be able to handle them before we wed,” Jack continued.
“I'm a virgin.” The words came out of my mouth before I could even think to stop them. It was the only thing I knew to say to hopefully bring this unpleasant conversation to an abrupt halt.
“Oh, really?” He rubbed the back of his neck, shooting me a glance of what I could only describe as discomfort. Now things were really awkward.
“Yes.” I tried to remain strong, preparing my rebuttal for his advances.
Jack took a deep breath before speaking again. “There's a school in California that I'd like you to go to before we're married. They can teach you how to be the kind of lover that I need.”
“Why can't you teach me?” My voice was small, almost frightened sounding. I couldn't believe that we had just met, and he already wanted to talk about sex.
“I'm not that great as a teacher. And if you're a virgin, then you're definitely going to need lessons.”
I considered this for a moment. The prospect sounded fun and exciting, yet at the same time, I was offended that he wanted to send me away so quickly after arriving. “We only have six months to plan the wedding. I don't think it's a good idea for me to leave so soon.”
“The school is only for a week. I knew that we didn't have a lot of time, so I signed you up for the condensed version.”
“You already signed me up!” I gasped, looking at him incredulously. How dare he sign me up for some creepy sex school without asking me first? If this was how our marriage was going to be, then maybe it wouldn't work out after all.
“I thought you'd be a bit more . . .” Jack hesitated, looking for the right words to say not to piss me off. It was a bit too late for that, though. If Liam were here, he'd give Jack a good lesson in how to treat a lady. Was this really what I'd been saving myself for?
“A bit more what? Slutty?”
“That's not what I meant. Calm down, will you?” His expression was pained. “It's not what you think. This school is one-hundred percent professional. You'll learn things about yourself that will completely change your life. And when you come back, I promise I'll be the husband you deserve.”
“And what if I don't want to go to this school?” I folded my arms over my chest, refusing to look at him.
“Then we'll still get married, but I doubt it will be a happy marriage.”
I sighed, gazing out into the darkness. I had honestly expected him to say that we wouldn't marry if I refused. Maybe I had even hoped for it. Everything was happening so fast. It seemed like one surreal event after another. I just wanted life to slow down and be normal.
“What kind of school is this anyway?” I asked finally, huffing to show my disapproval.
I could hear the reluctance in his voice. “Have you ever heard of BDSM?”
It sounded familiar, but I couldn't recall what the acronym stood for exactly. “Isn't that something to do with fetishes?”
“Something like that. It stands for Bondage, Domination, Sadism, and Masochism.”
“Sounds like slavery to me,” I cut in sharply.
“It's about willingly giving yourself to someone else for their pleasure,” he explained calmly. “The school I'd like to send you to will teach you how to be a good submissive so that you can fill all of my sexual needs.”
“Can't I do that without being a slave?” My words were bitter.
“I know this is a lot to digest right now, but I'd really like you to consider it. You're a beautiful woman, and I think we'll make a great couple. But a big part of marriage is compromise and being willing to fill each other's needs. If you can't do this for me, then we've already started off on the wrong track.”
I didn't know what else to say. There were so many emotions raging through me. Anger. Distrust. What he was asking of me seemed ridiculous.
My breath hitched as I felt his hand slide on top of mine, drawing it to his lips for a gentle kiss. His soft blue eyes spoke of purer intentions that betrayed his sinful request. It was strange to see him so calm and collected after such a heated conversation.
“Good night, honey bee,” Jack whispered as he walked away.
Honey bee? I thought about the pet nickname for a moment. After not being able to figure it out, I let my mind drift to more pressing matters, analyzing our conversation.
Jack made it sound like this school was really important to our marriage, and I definitely did want the marriage to wo
rk. But BDSM? The thought that he wanted me to be a slave to him was absolutely repulsive.
I decided to return to my room and try to get some sleep. In the morning, my mind would be clearer, much better for considering his indecent proposal. But as before, my brain was too occupied for sleep, and I lie restless. Within minutes, I was sitting in front of the computer, researching away.
For someone who claimed to know the acronym for BDSM, Jack had gotten it wrong. It was actually a condensed acronym for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadomasochism or sadism and masochism. I wouldn't fault him for being off the mark a bit, but I liked to stay as accurate as possible. The practice itself seemed to encompass a wide array of kink, from wax play to whipping. None of it sounded appealing to me at all.
After I had gotten a better idea of what BDSM was, I Googled for related schools in California. There appeared to be one in San Francisco, but it only offered weekend courses at a hefty price.
I scowled all the way back to bed. This wasn't what I had signed up for. Of course not. Jack had signed me up for it. But my thoughts spoke of something deeper. Being betrothed. Leaving my home. It wasn't what I had really wanted. I wished I would have had enough sense to see it before I got on the plane. My happily ever after should have been with sweet stable Liam, not with fetishist multibillionaire Jack Kemble, who didn't even know me—who didn't care to get to know me before signing me up for this stupid school.
A knock on my bedroom door startled me awake the next morning. I must have stayed up so late that I slept past breakfast. Groggily, I leaned over to look at the alarm clock. Ten in the morning. Definitely late for breakfast. Why hadn't they woken me up sooner?
“Melita, are you alright in there?” Jack's mother asked through the door.
“Yes, ma'am. I'm fine. I'll be out in a minute.”
“Alright.” I could hear her footsteps walking away.
Had Jack already left for the day, I wondered as I quickly got dressed. Deep inside, I hoped that he had. I didn't feel like I could face him yet, especially when I was still undecided about the school.
Thankfully, Jack wasn't downstairs when I emerged from my bedroom. His mother told me that he had gone out for a while and would be back for lunch. It was very vague, but I didn't bother asking questions.
With a few hours of sleep under my belt, my mind was definitely clearer and better able to handle processing our conversation from last night. While I really didn't want to go to the school, the fact that it was only for a week made it a lot less daunting. One week of misery for a lifetime of happiness, that seemed to be the bargain Jack had struck, though I was curious about why he thought we would be unhappy if I didn't want to learn firsthand about BDSM. Surely, he wasn't kinky all the time.
Jack returned promptly at 11:30 with a giant bouquet of white roses. The ear to ear grin on his face made it seem like our previous conversation had never taken place, and for a moment, I felt normal again.
“For my honey bee,” he said as he placed the flowers in my arms.
“You shouldn't have.” I smiled back at him before giving the roses a good whiff. They smelled intoxicatingly wonderful.
“I thought I might show you my home after we have lunch,” he suggested.
“That sounds lovely,” I replied, handing the flowers over to one of their maids so that she could put them in water and place them in my room.
At lunch, things seemed more relaxed. Jack's mother went over all of the social clubs they belonged to with me, clubs that I could only assume I would be expected to join once Jack and I were married, and quite possibly before. Meanwhile, Jack and his father talked business. To be honest, I was more interested in their conversation. Business was a much more fascinating topic than who to talk to and who to avoid.
After lunch, Jack walked me out to a yellow Lamborghini. I did my best not to smirk. It wasn't a vehicle for someone who wanted to keep a low profile, and I couldn't tell if he was purposely trying to attract attention to us or if he was just trying to impress me. Either way, I decided not to comment on the car.
“How do you like my parents?” Jack asked as we pulled out onto the highway.
“They're nice.”
“Good.”
And that was the end of conversation until we arrived at his lavish mansion. Looking up at the towering red-brick structure, it was hard to imagine that this would be my new home soon. More a castle than a house, it was bigger than any single man could ever need.
Like a perfect gentleman, Jack came around to open the door for me. Then he took me by my hand and led me up the walkway.
“Soon, I'll be carrying you over this threshold.” I could hear the smile in his voice as he ushered me inside, and a faint warmness entered my heart from his sweet words. How could a man this outwardly gentle and courteous have such dark fantasies?
Jack took me on the grand tour, showing me all ten bedrooms, his home theater, game room, home gym, indoor swimming pool, and even a small bowling alley. It seemed a bit excessive, definitely built for the needs of a bachelor who likely entertained guests frequently. My mind swam with images of the two of us enjoying all of those rooms together once we were married.
Finally, he led me to a door with a keypad next to it. Jack gazed at it nervously, stuffing his hands in his pockets before turning his eyes to mine. “This room, I'll show you when you get back from the school.”
“It's a dungeon, isn't it?”
My boldness caught him off guard. “Yes, it is.”
“Then you might as well show me now. I already know what it is. There's no point in hiding it from me.”
Jack's cool disposition was suddenly rattled. It would have made me smile if not for the seriousness of the situation. The contents of the room would give me a better idea of what he would expect of me, and I needed to see it so that I could psychologically prepare myself for when I returned.
Jack hesitated for a moment before entering the passcode into the keypad. The door slid open soundlessly, and he leaned in to turn on the light.
I did my best to still my nerves as I stepped inside. The dungeon looked like something straight out of a horror movie, with manacles hanging from the walls and ceiling. There was a wooden sawhorse upholstered with rich black leather in one corner of the room. In another, was a stockade with a t-bar. I could only assume that it was meant for the person to be restrained while bending over. Against the back wall was a queen bed. It would have been the only innocent looking piece of furniture in the room if not for the steel shackles that were welded onto the bed posts.
“What do you think?” Jack asked as he watched me cross the room to look at the wall that had a rack of paddles, riding crops, and whips neatly displayed on it.
I sighed, searching for the right words to say that wouldn't offend him or make our time in the room any more awkward. “I don't know what to think.”
“I realize that it's a bit overwhelming for you.” He cautiously stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. My body instantly tensed at his touch. “But we'll be happy together. I promise.”
How could he make such a promise without even knowing me? It was like saying that a lion could co-exist peacefully with a lamb without knowing the true nature of the beasts. One predator, the other prey. I knew which animal I felt like at that moment.
“I scheduled your flight for Sunday,” he said matter-of-factly, dropping the loving fiancé act but still sounding gentle. “You'll arrive in Sacramento where a limousine will take you to the facility in Napa Valley. It's a private place. Very quaint and beautiful. Nestled among grape vines and rolling hills. I think you'll enjoy the ambiance. I know I did when I toured the place.”
“You toured the place?” I wasn't sure why I sounded surprised. My mind was muddled with shock that I was leaving so soon, among other things. It was yet another surreal moment that my brain was having a difficult time coping with.
“Of course I did. There's no way I would send you t
o a school without approving it myself first.” Jack hugged me tenderly, and for some reason, I did find it comforting.
“Everything is happening so fast. I didn't expect it to be like this,” I admitted.
“What did you expect it to be like?”
I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. Perhaps it wasn't what I had expected, but it was what I had hoped for—that Jack would be like Liam, sweet and romantic, but with a bit more money and style. I had imagined that he would wine and dine me, sweep me off of my feet and romance me like a fairytale princess. I had imagined us sitting up late at night, telling each other stories of our childhoods—relating on so many levels to growing up wealthy and over protected. I had hoped that Jack would be a kindred spirit—the man of my dreams—the perfect husband.
“I don't know what I expected,” I told him finally.
Jack knew it was a lie but didn't press any further. “Let's get out of here,” he whispered. “I would not see you frown a second longer.”
We left the dismal dungeon and headed out onto the road for some sight-seeing. Everywhere we went, I could feel eyes on us, analyzing our relationship. The paparazzi made an appearance when we toured the Statue of Liberty, and I did my best to seem as poised as possible. Jack was more than willing to pose for the cameras, gathering me up in his arms and placing a confident kiss on my cheek, as if we had already spent a lifetime together. I admired the way he catered to the media, always polite no matter how invasive they became. I only hoped I could hold myself together so well when they got me alone.
For dinner, Jack took me out to eat at Masa, an exquisite Japanese restaurant in the Time Warner Center. The experience was fun and refreshing, considering that there were no menus to order from. We spent three hours receiving course after course of seafood, sushi, and truffle items. By the time we left, I was practically waddling, I was so full.
“That was absolutely amazing,” I told Jack as we climbed back into his Lamborghini.
“I'm glad you liked it,” he replied, simply staring at me.