Raelya smirked at me then pulled her night shirt over her head. I blinked and glanced away. Raelya laughed softly, “You know, you will have to get used to it, Dakota. As werewolves, we are naked often.”
I nodded. “I don’t think it’s so hard with… most people.”
Raelya shifted into her wolf form without reply, then nudged me with her furry face.
“All right, I’m coming.” I awkwardly struggled the boxer shorts off then pulled my shirt over my head and shifted, whimpering at the pain. As the wolf form took over, my eyesight sharpened and focused in the dimmer light. Between the muted television and the open windows, the room was as bright as I needed to see Raelya’s room as plain as day. I marveled at the strength of my vision and wondered why I hadn’t really paid attention to it earlier. I figured I’d been too busy with running, hunting, and trying not to kill Jack to really focus on the details, and really, that made sense. It hadn’t been easy to think about silly human things when the wolf wanted to run and be free. Silly human things like why I didn’t need a flashlight in the wooded mountains at night, or like how frightening an angry werewolf snarling at me should have been, or why I shouldn’t cuddle up with my packmate who has obvious interest in me when I have a girlfriend out there somewhere.
I laid down next to Raelya and she snuggled up against my side and everything felt perfect. I laid my head on top of her head and she nipped at me playfully. I nipped back and met her eyes, and for the first time, I felt her wolf pushing and fighting against me. Her will hit mine and we struggled for a long moment, growling slightly before I pounced, placing my body above hers and snapping my jaws at her throat. Raelya wiggled to the side and pushed me over. I tried to get back on top but she pushed me down again. I tried to worm my face into her shoulder but she twisted away and put her paw down on my shoulder and shoved me down again. I started to push for her again, but she yawned and laid down suddenly.
I was confused at first, then I understood: she wasn’t going to fight me. While it wasn’t a victory, my wolf was satisfied enough for the moment. I laid down half across her and she let me. I didn’t try to put my teeth on her throat though I still wanted to. She wasn’t submitting to me; our position with each other was yet undecided. But she was warm and I was tired, and I felt she wanted to lay down and sleep just as much as I did. So I laid there, half on top of her, and went to sleep.
I dreamed of running.
Running in the woods with the pack, echoes of paws hitting soil and panting and howls up ahead. I chased down a rabbit and its blood filled my mouth like a sweet, hot drink. The moon overhead was full, brighter and rounder than it had been the night before by half. I saw Raelya ahead of me and I ran to chase after her, but I heard a startled, quiet voice behind me that spoke my name. “Dakota?”
I whipped my head around and Amorie reached out to me. Her eyes were sad and pleading. I took a step toward her as my heart panged with guilt, but I heard paws on the ground behind me and looked back up to see Raelya still standing there, now joined by Jack who towered over her like a nightmare, far larger and scarier than he’d been in real life. I lowered my head to snarl at him, but Amorie called out again and I tried to reach out to her, my human hand extending in her direction.
I startled as I looked down and saw that I was not one body, but two, a girl and a wolf, both standing in the same place, like two ghosts merging into each other. The wolf surged toward Raelya as Jack nudged her aside, putting himself between her and me. The human tried to step toward Amorie, but could not dislodge herself from the wolf. I looked up into her eyes as they flooded with tears.
I woke with a gasp and the room was still dark. I shivered at the images that still lingered in my head as I hopped off the bed and landed on four feet. I shifted back to my human self, and since Raelya hadn’t stirred, didn’t bother searching for my clothes which were all under the blankets anyway. Instead, I found my phone which I’d left charging on Raelya’s desk and took it to the bathroom. I stared at it a while and thought about texting Amorie, but I wanted to do better than that, so I firmly squashed down my anxiety and called her.
“Bonsoir my little wolf. How was your run?” I took a deep breath and let it out lengthily. Amorie cut across my reply, “What is wrong?”
“Nothing.” I lied. “I just… had a really bad dream.”
I heard Amorie let out a breath. “Aww. Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not really. Just… wanted to hear your voice.”
“Well I am here, ma chérie. Tell me about your run.”
I pulled a towel down off the rack and wrapped it around myself for warmth and sat down in the corner. “It was awesome. Ralof lead us out and when we started running all together as a pack it was like nothing I’d ever felt.”
“Ooh, sounds exciting.”
“It was. So very exciting. I don’t even know how to describe it, Am. It was the best feeling.”
“Hopefully not the only best feeling, ma chérie.” Amorie’s voice came out in a low purr that sent a tingle up my spine.
“Oh… no, I didn’t mean that…”
Amorie took a deep breath and let it out slowly, purposefully drawing the air across the phone so I would hear her. “I can not wait to see you again, Dakota. I can not wait to see your little wolf form, and to touch you again, to kiss you.”
My chest rose and fell more heavily as my body reacted to Amorie’s sensual tone. “I can’t wait for that either, Am. I think you’re going to like my wolf. Everyone keeps telling me I’m a cute wolf.”
“Mm, I am looking forward to it indeed.” She shivered out a breath.
“What are you doing right now?”
“Thinking of you, of course, my little wolf. Thinking of your touch.”
I felt my face growing red as I realized what she was suggesting. “Ooh…” I couldn’t repress a smile. “So it’s like that, huh?”
I could practically hear the smile on her voice. “It can be, if you would like it, mon amour.” A mischievous smile at that.
I closed my eyes and leaned back against the wall. “I’m not opposed.”
“In that case…” she purred, “close your eyes and see me. I am laying on my bed. I am wearing a short satin negligee and my hair is down.”
I pictured her lying there on her large, canopied bed in seductive attire as she described the details of her outfit. I could see it all so clearly; strong visualization skills were one of the positive aspects of dyslexia. I pictured my hand reaching out to touch her. I could practically feel the cool softness of her flesh, and my body grew warm at the imagined touch.
“Now, I am kissing your neck.” She whispered breathily, making the sounds I would expect to hear if she were doing just that. My legs felt shaky at the tension she was building even from two hundred miles away. I slid my hand down my thigh as I imagined she would do as she described her hand touching my—
“What?” Amorie spoke very sharply, sounding supremely annoyed. I heard her exchange a few terse words with someone on the other end, and then she sighed loudly. “Dakota… I am so sorry, I have to go, now.”
I did my best to sound cheerful. “No problem. I’ll call you tomorrow okay? Gonna try to get some sleep.”
“Thank you for understanding, ma chérie.” She sounded truly regretful as she hung up.
I stared at the phone for a moment after the call ended then sighed loudly. “Whoever you are that just interrupted her… I hate you so much right now.”
I briefly considered trying to finish what Amorie had started, but decided that without her voice to guide me it just felt awkward and unsexy, especially when I realized I was sitting in a bath towel in the bathroom of a friend who was currently sleeping in the next room and who was also obviously attracted to me.
Wolf form is definitely safer, I decided as I put the towel away and stepped over to the door which I cleverly remembered to open before shifting, straining to be quiet as I did so. I went back to bed and tried to forget the heat i
n my lack-of-pants and the ache in my belly at missing the woman I loved.
I woke hours later to that warm sensation resurfacing as Raelya nuzzled my face. I was nuzzling her back and our bodies, still fur-covered, were very close and she was still beneath me. She wiggled a little under my weight, but I knew she was not actually trying to dislodge me, as proven by the fact I was not laying on the floor.
I wasn’t thinking, not with my human brain. The wolf was in charge, and the wolf wanted Raelya very much. The wolf did not care about silly things like monogamy and vampiric girlfriends two hundred miles away. The wolf wanted this wolf who was with her, right here, and right now. And right then, the wolf was in charge.
Raelya licked my face and I licked at hers in return, then nuzzled her face with mine. She whined, a high-pitched sound full of wanting. My wolf wanted her and she wanted me too.
I nuzzled my face into her neck and pressed my teeth against her throat. Raelya struggled at that and snapped at me. I snapped back, then shifted my weight to lock her shoulders down. We wrestled for a long moment, struggling back and forth until I managed to get my weight on her just so and locked my teeth around her throat. For a few seconds, she struggled still, and then finally she relaxed and laid down beneath me. My wolf was dominant over her wolf, and she had finally accepted it.
My wolf was pleased with this, pleased with claiming Raelya as her own, but she wanted to claim even more from her. I felt my body pressing tightly against Raelya’s furry back and suddenly, my human mind woke up. I snapped into the realization of what I was doing and recoiled. My human form tore free from the wolf as violently as I’d ever felt and I yelled in agony as I stumbled off of the bed and tumbled, naked, onto the floor.
Raelya whipped her head up, concerned, and then started shifting as well. She sat up, naked on her bed, and reached down to me. “Dakota, are you all right?”
I peered up at her pathetically, tears in my eyes. “I… I’m sorry, Raelya. I don’t know what I was thinking… This isn’t…”
Raelya blinked, and the realization of what I meant hit her eyes, then she smiled at me softly. “Oh…”
I hadn’t wanted to cheat on Amorie, but my wolf had seemed to have other plans. I felt terrible. Guilt sank my heart to the bottom of the guilty-bastard sea. As I met Raelya’s eyes, I felt even worse. I hadn’t meant or wanted to hurt Raelya either. But it seemed I had managed to do both.
I picked myself up to sit against the bed and hugged my knees, dropping my face onto them. “I’m sorry…”
Raelya laid down on the bed and dropped her arms around me gently. “It is all right, Dakota. I understand.”
I shook my head. “How can you be so understanding? I’m such a dick…”
Raelya nuzzled my head. “You are not a dick. You are very sweet, and I love you.” She bumped her head against my head. “It is not your fault I am attracted to you. Nor is it fair of me to encourage you so when I know that you are with someone else.”
I found myself nuzzling her back and firmly stopped the motion. I wasn’t doing it on purpose again. Was instinct really that strong? I sighed. “It’s not that I don’t like you, Raelya. I really do.”
“Perhaps that is more the problem.” Raelya smiled at me softly.
I sighed shakily. “Yeah. I guess it is.”
“I am not upset at you, Dakota.”
I glanced up at her, blinking at the tears in my eyes. “You’re not?”
Raelya shook her head. “No. Perhaps, a little sad. Because I am very fond of you, and… Well, I would have liked it if I had perhaps been the one to find you first.”
I lowered my head again, feeling miserable. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
“Stop that. You are not at fault. And you are not cheating. Nothing happened. You were just… close.” She thumped my head softly.
I sighed. “Does it make a difference if it actually happened? The problem is how much I wanted it to.”
Raelya sighed. “That… I suppose I can not help you with. But hopefully your Amorie will understand. The wolf and the person, they do not always want the same things. Especially for the young, it can be difficult to reconcile both sides and their desires.”
“She shouldn’t have to understand. I shouldn’t have so much trouble being faithful to her.” I did my best not to sound snappy, but I was angry at myself, so it was hard to hold the aggression in. Fortunately, the more experienced werewolf seemed to understand the difficulty I was having, or at least, she didn’t react to it.
Raelya seemed like she didn’t agree, but she said nothing and just hugged me. After a long moment, I let out a shaky breath. “I’m going to get a shower and get dressed.”
“All right.” Raelya let me go as I stood and headed for her bathroom. I showered quickly in cold water. When I came back from the shower, she was gone, and I figured it was just as well. I felt like an ass, and I was embarrassed at the thought of even looking her in the eyes. I thought of how Amorie would be coming to see me tomorrow if all went well, and my heart panged sharply. I wanted to call her right now and tell her what happened so I could get what I deserved and get it over with. But the bright sunlight pouring in said that was not possible right now, so I threw on some clothes and settled for being mad at myself instead.
I walked out of Raelya’s room and decided to go down for breakfast. The house was still relatively busy as many wolves had opted to stay the weekend, and I passed a couple of people in the hall. I started down the stairs and a wolf of the four-legged variety bounded past my legs on the way to the second floor. I leaned against the wall as I hurried downward, trying to stay out of the way. I thought for an instant that I’d screwed up and gotten in someone’s way when a hand slapped into the wall in front of me, leaving someone’s arm blocking my progress downward. As it turns out, I was mistaken.
I glanced up at the face attached to the arm blocking my path and came face to face with Jack. He leaned closer, forcing me back against the wall. “Howdy. Dakota, ain’t it?”
“Yeah…” I didn’t like his proximity, and I didn’t buy the friendliness of his tone.
“You an’ me, we oughta talk.” He informed me eloquently. “Listen. Raelya’s real important to me, an’ I’m gonna ask you nicely to back off of ‘er.”
I blinked at the request. Apparently Jack had taken us to be together. Or maybe he hadn’t been sure the night before but realized it now that I’d walked out of her room. Then I realized I could still smell her on me, so I knew he could too. I was already feeling grumpy from my own failings this morning, and I was in no mood to deal with misogyny and chauvinism. “Raelya’s a big girl. I think she can decide for herself who she wants to be with.”
Jack nodded as if giving me a point, but went on, “That she can, but I’m askin’ you all the same. I hear you got yourself some vampire anyway. So back off and we can all be friends.”
I suddenly barked out a short, humorless laugh. “Are you threatening me?”
“I’m just sayin’ it’d be better for everyone if you didn’t—”
“I’m gonna stop you right there, cowboy. For one,” I gestured to myself exaggeratedly, “this is a bully-free zone. You say you’re asking me nicely, but what you’re really doing is threatening. For two, Raelya is a grown woman and she can decide for herself what she wants.” My voice grew louder and faster as my anger stoked my audacity. “And for three, it’s no wonder she’s not interested in men if the best example she’s had is a misogynistic jerk who’s so under-confident in his ability to win a girl with his own charms he feels he needs to scare off the competition to stand a chance!”
Jack snarled in my face and slammed me into the wall. I bounced back ready for a fight but instead of hitting me again, he met my eyes and his will slammed into me instead.
I fucking fought it.
Not because it was smart. Not because I really believed I should be more dominant or higher in the pack than Ralof’s third. But because this man was a dinosaur who still saw
women as property, as something he had a right to barter for behind her back instead of dealing with her directly. And neither Dakota the woman nor Dakota the wolf was willing to bend knee to such a man.
So I fought Jack’s will with my own. My wolf surged to the surface and I felt his do the same. We slammed into each other physically and he wrestled me back against the wall, pressing me hard into the solid wood. I growled in anger and frustration at his greater physical strength, but I was not going to let him beat me, no matter how many years he had on me, no matter how much stronger he might be.
“All right.” His voice was low and full of anger. “Let’s do this.”
I wasn’t nearly as strong as Jack was, but I was wily and I knew how to break a hold from my security training. I slipped out of his clench and ducked low, then pushed up against his chest with all my strength, forcing him to stumble back a step or lose his balance. Since we had started the fight on the second to last stair, Jack had poor footing and ended up stumbling back further than I’d expected him to. He caught his balance with one foot on the ground floor and one foot on the bottom step. I felt my fingers curl as if grasping for the Hellfire that wanted to leap to my palm and—
I panicked as I realized my palm felt too hot and I clenched my fist to stop the flow of energy that had almost risen from it. As I did, I put a hand up to Jack. “Wait. I can’t fight you—”
Jack roared at me and slammed me back into the wall. “Fuckin’ coward! You ain’t gettin’ out of this that easy!” His arm started rippling as his form began to shift, and I noticed he wasn’t getting any smaller. Fur ripped its way out of his forearms and started sprouting all over his face.
I panicked again. He was going into his freaking war form. Shit.
But I couldn’t try to fight him, or I risked hurting others who didn’t deserve it. Shit. Shit. Shit.
So I did the only thing I could think of; I shifted into my wolf form as quickly as I could, and darted between his legs.
Hunted (Auralight Codex: Dakota Shepherd Book 2) Page 11