‘Yes, fine. And thanks for today, Ross. We both enjoyed it.’
‘It was my pleasure,’ he said huskily, bending to kiss her and drop a kiss on Grace’s curls as well.
Heather was deeply touched by the way he had included Grace so naturally. She waited to wave him off then carried Grace to the bedroom and quickly undressed her. The little girl didn’t stir as Heather popped her into her cot. It was rather early to put her to bed but there didn’t seem any point in waking her up.
Heather left the bedroom door ajar and went into the sitting-room and sank onto the sofa. She took a deep breath as she thought about everything that had happened that day, from her talk with her mother that morning to Ross’s final kiss before he had left her. It was hard to believe that so much had changed in a few short hours.
She’d told Ross that she was falling in love with him and that had opened the way to a whole new life. There was still a remnant of the old fear lingering inside her but she would find a way to deal with it. She wanted a future with Ross and that far outweighed everything else.
The next few days were so hectic that Ross felt as though his feet never touched the ground. He stayed at Kate’s so he could take the twins to school each morning before he went to work and collected them from their friend’s house each evening after he had finished. Mike was spending all his time with Kate because it appeared that she had suffered a slight loss of memory. Some things were perfectly clear to her but others she had forgotten. However, the more time Mike spent with her, the more her condition improved.
Ross was very aware that he’d had little chance to speak to Heather since their trip to the country. He phoned her each night but the telephone was a poor substitute for actually seeing her. He called into the accident and emergency unit when he took the twins to see Kate on Tuesday evening but Heather was busy in Resus. He had to be content with another phone call later that evening, but the more time they spent apart the more his uncertainties grew. Was he doing the right thing by letting her fall in love with him?
Everything came to a head on Thursday afternoon in the worst possible way. Red Watch were halfway through their shift when a call came in to say there were two men trapped on board a boat that had sunk in the River Thames. They’d been restoring an old barge when the gas cylinder they’d been using had exploded. The barge had sunk in about six feet of water, trapping both men inside.
Ross was already running through the problems they might encounter as he climbed into the fire engine. According to the river police, the tide was coming in and the stretch of river where the barge had sunk was well known for its treacherous currents. He turned to Baz Russell.
‘I want you to get kitted up in underwater gear as soon as we arrive. You, too, Charlie. We’ll have to cut through the hull to get them out but it’s not going to be easy with the tide rising.’
‘It’s a nice day for a swim, though,’ Baz replied chirpily. He was always cheerful, which was one of the reasons why he was one of the most popular members of the crew.
‘There’s swimming and there again there’s swimming,’ Charlie replied glumly. ‘Can’t see why you’re so pleased at the thought of wading around in all that mud.’
‘Oh, I don’t know. Look on the bright side. It will probably do wonders for our complexions,’ Baz shot back. ‘I was reading an article in my mum’s magazine about the amount of money those film stars pay for mud treatments. We’re going to get the same thing for free!’
‘So long as you remember to wash it off before you get back in this engine,’ Jack Marsh warned him. ‘We don’t want you two stinking the place out, do we, lads?’
Ross shook his head in amusement as the others added their own comments. ‘You lot are worse than a bunch of kids.’ He sobered as Jack slowed the engine as they approached their turning. ‘OK. We’re almost there so forget the jokes and mind what you’re doing. We all know how treacherous it can be in the river.’
He jumped down from the cab and went to speak to the police officer who was co-ordinating the rescue. A camera crew from one of the television stations were also there but Ross shook his head when a reporter tried to interview him. There was no time to waste. The two men were still alive apparently, trapped in an air pocket, but it was imperative they were brought out before the tide reached its peak.
Ross quickly organised his men and accompanied them to the riverbank. Terry and Jack attached safety lines to the two crewmen who were going into the water and handed them the cutting gear they would need. Ross checked his watch.
‘You’ve got twenty minutes until high tide so you’re going to have to work fast.’
‘No problemo,’ Baz replied cheerfully. He pulled on his face mask then disappeared into the murky water, and Charlie swiftly followed.
‘Keep a close eye on those safety lines,’ Ross instructed. ‘I don’t want any problems.’
He waited anxiously, keeping a watchful eye on the time. The water was rising steadily so that within a short time the section of hull that had been visible had disappeared. There was a glow coming up through the water from the oxyacetylene torches the men were using, but he couldn’t see either Baz or Charlie because it was too muddy. He breathed a sigh of relief when Charlie suddenly emerged with one of the men who’d been trapped.
‘Get them out of there!’ Ross instructed. He looked back at the water but there was no sign of Baz with the other man. ‘Where are they?’
‘The other chap was panicking a bit,’ Charlie wheezed, dragging in air. ‘Baz seemed to have things under control, though.’
‘The line’s loose,’ Terry suddenly shouted. ‘It’s either snapped or Baz has unclipped it.’
‘Go back down and see what’s happening,’ Ross instructed. He stripped off his jacket as Charlie slid into the water. ‘And somebody fetch me the other set of diving apparatus!’
He changed into the wetsuit in record time and strapped the air tank to his back. The camera crew was filming what was happening but he ignored them as he got ready. Charlie resurfaced just as he was about to wade into the water.
‘I can’t see any sign of them!’ the man said frantically. ‘There’s too much mud swilling around because of the tide.’
Ross quickly attached himself to a safety line and plunged into the river. He could feel the current tugging him away from the bank but managed to get a grip on the barge’s handrail. He used it to haul himself down but there was no sign of Baz or the man he’d been trying to rescue.
Ross searched further afield, feeling the current carrying him out to the centre of the river, where it was most dangerous. He knew he shouldn’t be taking such a risk but he was desperate to find Baz. His safety line suddenly went taut as it reached its limit but there was still no sign of the men. They had completely disappeared. He was exhausted from trying to fight the current and had to use the safety line to help him get back to shore where the crew hauled him out of the water.
‘Alert the river police,’ he said tonelessly, stripping off his oxygen mask. ‘Tell them there are two men missing.’
They stayed on site until they were ordered to return to base. They all knew there was no possibility of the men being found alive by then but it was difficult to walk away. The silence on the return journey was in stark contrast to the jocularity when they’d set out.
Ross knew there would be an inquiry into what had happened so he went straight to his office to write his report. He kept going over and over what he had done, wondering if he should have gone himself instead of sending Baz.
He sighed because who could say that he wouldn’t have been swept away? It was the risk they all lived with, day in and day out. None of them knew if today might be the day when their luck ran out and the thought suddenly crystallised every single one of the fears he’d had in the past few days.
It could be him who didn’t return next time. Whilst he was willing to accept the dangers of his job, he wasn’t prepared to let Heather suffer.
He got up and
went to the window, and his heart felt like a lead weight as he stared across the city skyline because he knew what he had to do. He had to end his relationship with Heather.
‘Hey, Heather, take a look at this!’
Heather looked round when she heard Mel calling her. They were in the staffroom, taking a break while it was slack, and Mel had just switched on the television to watch the early evening news bulletin. Heather wandered over to see what was happening and gasped when she saw Ross on the television screen.
‘That’s Ross!’ she exclaimed.
‘Uh-huh. Seems a boat capsized in the river this afternoon and they had to send for the fire brigade. There were two men trapped on board, apparently.’ Mel sighed. ‘One of the firemen was swept away, along with the chap he was trying to rescue. They’re assuming they both must have drowned.’
Heather sank onto a chair as her legs gave way. ‘Y-you don’t mean Ross, do you?’
‘No! Ross was in charge of the rescue, which is why they were showing his picture.’ Mel groaned when she saw Heather’s white face. ‘Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you. Me and my big mouth, eh?’
‘It’s OK.’ She tried to smile but it was a relief when Trish popped her head round the door to tell Melanie there was someone in Reception asking to speak to her.
Heather leant her head against the back of the chair but her nerves were so tightly strung that it wasn’t easy to calm down. The thought that Ross might have been the one to have been swept away by the river that afternoon terrified her. Surely she would be making a big mistake if she followed her heart and got even more deeply involved with him?
Picking up the remote control, she changed channels and found a different news bulletin. Once again there was a report of the incident and she made herself watch it from start to finish. She needed to watch it so that it would drive home the full enormity of what she was doing.
Ross appeared in almost every scene as he organised the rescue attempt with a confidence and efficiency that couldn’t help but impress her. He was a true professional at his job, calm under pressure, steadfast in a crisis and undeniably brave. She loved him so much and couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to him but, as she sat there and watched, she realised that she was willing to take that risk if it meant they could be together.
Heather switched off the television and took a deep breath. All of a sudden the situation was so simple that she couldn’t understand why she hadn’t realised it before. Losing Stewart had been a terrible tragedy but she’d never once wished that she hadn’t met him. They had loved one another and that love had enriched her life and given her Grace.
She felt the same about Ross. She didn’t regret falling in love with him even though she’d tried to prevent it. Maybe there were no guarantees about how long they would have together but she needed him. Her life would be meaningless without him.
A sudden smile curved her mouth. And when she saw him next, she would tell him that.
Heather was just about to deal with a patient when she saw Ross come into the A and E unit. She felt her heart flip over with pleasure and quickly handed the patient’s notes to Mel.
‘Can you tell Mrs Davies I’ll be with her in a few minutes, please?’
‘Will do,’ Mel replied, grinning at her. ‘I take it that Station Officer Tanner isn’t here on official business?’
Heather laughed. ‘Not if I’ve got anything to do with it!’
She hurried across the waiting area, uncaring what anyone thought as she reached up and kissed Ross on the cheek. She was sorely tempted to blurt out her news right then and there but just managed to hold back. She was glad she had when she suddenly realised that Ross had made no attempt to return her greeting.
‘Is everything all right?’ she asked uncertainly, drawing back.
‘Not really.’ He smiled rather grimly and Heather felt her stomach lurch in apprehension.
‘It’s not Kate, is it? She hasn’t suffered a relapse?’
‘Kate is fine. I just need to talk to you, Heather.’
Once again Heather felt a chill run through her when she heard how distant he sounded. She had no idea what was wrong but there was definitely something troubling him.
‘I’ll be finished here in about fifteen minutes,’ she explained, trying desperately to stay calm. ‘I could meet you in the coffee-shop.’
‘Make it the bar across the road, the one with the tables outside. I would prefer not to have people watching us.’
‘All right.’ Heather put a detaining hand on his arm when he turned to leave. ‘What is this all about, Ross? Can’t you at least give me an idea?’
‘Let’s wait until later, Heather.’
He didn’t add anything before he left. Heather made her way to the cubicle where her patient was waiting but it was difficult to concentrate as she examined Beryl Davies’s leg. The woman had been bitten by her dog and there was extensive tissue damage to her calf, which would require more than a few stitches to sort it all out.
Heather phoned the plastic surgery reg, sighing when she was told that he was in Theatre and that it would be at least half an hour before he could see her patient. She hung up, knowing that she couldn’t leave until she’d spoken to him. She wanted to know what was wrong with Ross and every extra minute she had to wait was pure torture. What was it that he wanted to tell her?
It was almost an hour later before she made it to the bar. Ross was sitting at a table in the corner and he stood up when she approached. There was a flatness about his tone that increased Heather’s nervousness so that she found it difficult to answer when he asked her what she would like to drink.
‘Just mineral water, please.’
She sat down while he went to the bar. Unfastening her jacket she tried to remain calm but her heart was hammering. She didn’t even wait for him to sit when he came back with a tall glass of fizzy water.
‘What’s going on, Ross? What do you want to talk to me about?’
‘I’ve been trying to think of an easy way to say this, Heather, but there isn’t one, I’m afraid.’
He sat down and she felt her heart curl up when she saw the regret on his face. ‘I’ve decided that we shouldn’t see one another again. I’m sorry, but I really and truly believe it would be best if we ended this right now.’
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
ROSS could see the shock on Heather’s face and could have wept. He desperately didn’t want to hurt her but he had no choice. How could he take the risk of ruining her life as it had been ruined once before? He knew he was doing the right thing—the only thing—but that didn’t mean he felt good about it.
‘End things…?’ She stopped and swallowed. ‘I’m sorry, Ross, but I don’t understand. Why do you want to end our relationship if you love me?’
Ross had known she would ask that. He also knew that if he told her the truth she would find a way to dismiss his fears, and he couldn’t allow himself to be swayed.
‘I think I may have got a bit…well, carried away when I told you that, Heather. I’ve had time to think since then and I realise it was a mistake to tell you I was in love with you.’
It was simply a distortion of the truth but he knew which way she would interpret it. He ground his teeth when he saw the colour drain from her face.
‘So what you’re saying is that you don’t love me and that’s why you want to end our relationship?’ She didn’t wait for him to answer as she pushed back her chair. ‘I’m sorry, Ross. I never meant to cause you any embarrassment. I appreciate you being so honest with me.’
‘Heather, wait!’ he implored. He caught hold of her hand as she stood up. ‘I never meant this to happen. You understand that, don’t you?’
‘Yes, of course I do.’
She gently released herself and his heart ached when he saw the way she was struggling to maintain her control. He’d done this to her! He had made her open up her heart and had then rejected her. He would never forgive himself. It was only the thought o
f how much greater her suffering might be if they continued seeing one another and something happened to him that gave him the strength to sit there as she left the bar.
Ross finished his drink and ordered another. He rarely drank alcohol because he preferred to keep a clear head but he needed something to dull the ache that night. He’d sent Heather away and, whilst it had been the right thing to do, it hurt unbearably. Maybe Heather would meet someone else in time but he would never find anyone he could love as much as her. Heather was everything he had ever dreamed of and she could never be his.
Heather was filled with despair as she made her way home. She could scarcely believe what had happened. Ross didn’t love her! He’d been mistaken about his feelings for her!
The words ran through her head in time to the thunder of the train as it sped through the Underground tunnels so that she felt sick by the time she reached her stop. She walked the rest of the way home, knowing that she would have to put on a brave face for Grace’s sake. Wasn’t this what she’d always feared, that she would have her heart broken again and that it would affect her precious daughter? But what she had never anticipated was that she could feel such despair because a relationship had ended. She felt every bit as bereft as she’d felt when Stewart had died!
Grace was eager to tell her about nursery school so Heather sat on the sofa while the little girl showed her the pictures she had drawn. She admired the squiggly stick figures and asked questions but it was as though her brain had split itself into two. One side was responding as normal whilst the other was weeping for her lost love.
Grace was blissfully unaware of her distraction and chattered on but it was a relief when Sandra announced that she was going out to dinner again that night. Heather knew that she would never have been able to fool her mother and the thought of having to explain what was wrong was more than she could bear. She needed to come to terms with what had happened before she could talk about it.
She went to bed as soon as Grace was settled and spent a sleepless night going over everything Ross had said to her. She found it difficult to believe that he had changed his mind because he’d seemed so sure of his feelings. She felt completely exhausted when it was time to get up for work and was glad that Grace and her mother were still asleep because she wouldn’t have been able to hide her distress from them. Maybe she would be able to cope by the time she returned home.
Saving Dr. Cooper Page 18