by Nicole Casey
“Ayla,” I sighed, unsure of else to say to make her less angry. “Please don’t leave like this.”
“Like what?” she retorted, folding her arms over her chest to look outside the window sullenly. “Like a one-night stand doing the walk of shame?”
I gritted my teeth.
“Don’t cheapen it. I had a good time with you but can’t you look at this from my perspective? I brought you home with me when you weren’t in any position to agree and we both fell off the radar for a full day almost. This will be an amusing story for your friends but this is my career!”
There was a slight anguish in my voice as I realized she might not go along with my plan.
Helena wouldn’t. She’d purposely throw me to the wolves with a grin on her face.
I stared imploringly at Ayla, willing her not to be the very thing I was trying to avoid but the more I looked at her, the more I realized it was why I had been so drawn to her. She was a lost soul and I was trying to protect her—just like I had with my ex-wife.
“Stop staring at me like that!” she snapped. “Let’s go before they come up here anyway.”
I exhaled, uncertain of what she intended to do.
“Don’t worry,” she spat when I started the Jeep. “I won’t tell anyone I was with you.”
Relief almost punched me in the face.
“So I guess our date is off?” she mocked me.
“Not necessarily,” I replied evasively. I wanted nothing more than to pick her up later and take her somewhere remote, overlooking the mountains and under the stars. But first things first.
“Nice answer,” she huffed but I felt her eyeing me.
“What are you going to say?” I insisted, unsure if I was out of the woods yet. She snorted angrily.
“I’ll just tell them that I met a guy and went home with him for a one-night stand,” she muttered without meeting my eyes. “The truth in other words.”
I cringed, thinking of a thousand flaws with the story but it was the best story given the circumstances. Time wasn’t on our side for this.
I cast her a sidelong look, careful to watch for the search party as we moved toward the resort.
I knew I couldn’t drive her all the way inside, lest someone see us and I stopped the Jeep nearby. It wasn’t far from the place I’d picked her up the previous night, really.
“Hey,” I called as she reached for the door. She paused but she didn’t look at me. “I’m glad we had today.”
“Whatever, Laz.”
She slammed the door and stomped off toward the resort, taking a small, remorseful piece of me with her.
I sat there for a few minutes, trying to gather myself.
She was just a one-night stand, I tried to tell myself but I wondered why I was lying to myself. I had been drawn to her even before I’d slept with her.
“Ranger Payne, come in.”
The radio crackled and I snatched it up.
“Ranger Payne speaking.”
“The girl has been located safe.”
“That’s a relief,” I said. “What’s her story?”
Donna chuckled.
“The story is she’s a spoiled brat who didn’t have the good sense to tell her friends she was off getting laid.”
Indignation sparked through me but I managed to keep my tone even.
“Glad there was a happy ending to this one.”
“Roger that. Over and out.”
I replaced the radio and stared wistfully toward the resort. Every part of me wanted to go to the cottage and apologize to Ayla but I resisted.
I couldn’t go then. I’d have to give it some time—both for her to cool off and for the heat to die down. She was surrounded by group of friends who would be suspicious of my arrival and probably connect the dots.
No, I would go to her in the morning. By then, everything would be calmer.
8
Ayla
Gennifer was furious with me. Kennedy eyed me in a way that told me she thought I’d disappeared to be petty and the others fussed over me. None of it was the attention I wanted.
In fact, I didn’t want any attention at all. All I wanted was to run back to Laz’s cabin and hide out in his arms like I’d been doing all day Saturday.
But he’d made it clear that wasn’t an option, not when I had literally caused a manhunt.
“You’re telling me that this guy didn’t have a phone or a charger you could have used,” Kennedy said, her brows arched in disbelief. “And it didn’t occur to you that we might be worried?”
I scowled.
“No,” I snapped back. “It really didn’t occur to me that you guys would be doing anything but involving yourselves in yourselves.”
It wasn’t fair to say that to Kennedy—she wasn’t like the others but I couldn’t help but last out at anyone. Laz wasn’t there for me. Kennedy was going to have to take the brunt of my wrath.
It’s her fault I even came on this stupid retreat, I reasoned unreasonably. If she hadn’t wanted to come so badly, I’d be home, waiting for Damien to be sick of his latest conquest.
My phone chimed then and I rushed to where it was charging, snatching it up with too much hope. Of course it couldn’t be Laz, apologizing for dumping me off on the side of the road. He didn’t have my number.
He found you on the side of the road, I reminded myself, the embarrassment the same as it had been when he told me. He was trying to do something good and you’re making him into the enemy.
No, it wasn’t Laz. It was Damien. And now that my phone had charge, I realized that he had been texting me all day, along with my friends.
-Babe, please, please, please tell me you’re okay. I’m really freaking out!
I tossed the phone down and stared at it in disbelief for a long moment. Two days ago, I would have been calling him back without hesitation. Suddenly, I didn’t give a rat’s ass about Damien Colt.
Still, after everything I had put everyone through, I knew I needed to text him back. With a resigning sigh, I reached for the phone and sent him a quick message.
-I’m fine. It was a misunderstanding.
To my complete chagrin, the phone rang in my hand.
“Jesus Christ,” I breathed.
“Your parents?” Kennedy offered. “Everyone has been freaking out.”
“Worse. It’s Damien.”
A look of interest glimmered in Kennedy’s eye as I begrudgingly answered the phone.
“Hey,” I muttered. “I’m fine. This really isn’t a good time to talk.”
“Fuck that!” My on-again-off-again snarled. “I’ve been out of my mind with worry. Where the hell were you?”
I smirked slightly. A part of me really wanted to tell him but the good Ayla, the make-no-waves, daughter-of-a-banker Ayla couldn’t bring herself to say the words.
“It was just a miscommunication. I told the girls I was going somewhere else but everyone was too drunk to remember,” I improvised. “It’s all fine.”
“Where did you go? You shouldn’t go off like that, Ayla. You’re in a strange place. There are bad people out there.”
I grimaced. What the hell did Damien know about strange places and bad people? He thought San Francisco was “ghetto.”
“Like I said, I’m fine.”
“I ordered a ticket for you to come home tomorrow morning. It’ll be waiting for you at Knoxville Downtown Island Airport. The flight leaves at nine fifteen for Miami. I’ll pick you up at the airport.”
I was strangely flattered in an annoyed way. Never had I heard Damien sound so concerned about my well-being and I found it hard to believe he even remembered when I’d been for the weekend.
“What happened to focusing on your work?” I demanded sarcastically.
“I know I haven’t always had the most stable relationship, Ayla but that’s going to change,” he swore. “When I heard you were missing, I…”
He trailed off and I thought I heard him sniffle.
Is he rea
lly crying?
This conversation was becoming more unbelievable with each word spoken.
“I realized how much of a fool I’d been. I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to you, Ayla. Please, just come home. I really need to see your face.”
I stared at Kennedy, willing the feelings of love and gratitude I know I should have felt to well inside my heart but there was nothing. Was he too late?
“I…” I swallowed. “I’ll think about it. I have to go, Damien.”
“Think about what?” His voice changed like someone had flipped a switch. “I’m offering you pure commitment, Aye. Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?”
“Seriously, Dame, it’s been a long day.”
That was the understatement of the century.
“If I decide to come home, I’ll let you know I’m on my way.”
I didn’t let him respond and I disconnected the call, shutting off my phone before he could call me back. I really didn’t want to hear his voice again that night.
Had he always had the whine in his tone or does it just seem that way because Laz has such a sonorous voice?
“Did you just hang up on Damien?” Kennedy asked, both awe and disbelief coloring her face.
“I’m tired,” I muttered. “I’m going to bed.”
“Really?” Gennifer screeched. “You ruined my bachelorette weekend and now you’re just going to bed?”
My mouth pressed together into a frown.
“You would think you’d be relieved not having to see me,” I retorted. “Good night.”
I made my way to the second floor, again consumed with the notion that I was the one being irrational, unreasonable.
Gennifer was insufferable but this was her weekend.
Kennedy was judging me but she had every right.
And Laz had asked me to keep my mouth shut to save his job.
He wasn’t wrong. He had a lot more to lose if the real story ever came out. Why had I taken it all so personally?
Because you’re an entitled brat. That’s why.
I closed the door to my suite and dug through the wardrobe for a change of clothes. Briefly, I considered having a shower but I didn’t want to wash the scent of Laz off me, not yet.
I wriggled into a pair of black shorts and a matching t-shirt, slipping a dark hoodie on over top.
I checked myself out in the mirror and snickered as I caught sight of my ruffled sex hair but I didn’t do anything to change it. I kind of liked it. There was just one more thing to remind me of Laz.
In fact, there was plenty to remind me of Laz, everywhere I looked. I caught the darkness of his eyes in the sky as I made my way out the second-storey veranda. I thought I caught a whiff of him when I shimmied down along the drainpipe to the ground.
Looking around, I thought I saw his Jeep on the roadway across from the chalet but of course it wasn’t his.
Why would he come? He said everything he needed to say. But I didn’t.
I would go home the next day but not before I explained to Laz that what I’d done with him was not commonplace, that I didn’t just do one-night stands. Would he be willing to see me again or was this it for him?
It seemed impossible that I could have learned to feel so strongly for someone so quickly but Laz had awoken something in me I hadn’t even known was there before. And I owed it to myself to see if there was something behind that, didn’t I? I couldn’t just go home and return to my boring, cookie-cutter life where I’d get married to Damien Colt and live a life of quiet desperation.
Not when I knew I could feel passion now.
I hoped that no one came upstairs to check on me but I’d brought my cell this time to text Kennedy if all went well with Laz. I didn’t want there to be another boy who cried wolf incident.
I followed the path along the woods, trying to remember exactly how we’d come back but in the dark, it was hard to navigate.
It didn’t take me long to realize I had gotten hopelessly lost. For half an hour, I wandered in circles, looking for signs of where I was going, feeling increasingly foolish as I did.
Finally, I made my way back to the roadway, leading back to the Mountainside but as I did, a car appeared out of nowhere and I instinctively jumped back into the bushes. And it was then that I caught glimpse of the driver.
My heart stopped, my breath paused and I stood there like a moron, trying to make sense of what I’d just seen.
Then, with a sinking, disgusted soul, I turned and ambled back toward the resort, knowing that I’d been lied to by Laz.
That’ s why he was in such a rush to get me out of there. That’s why he wanted to keep his part silent in all this. I saw the signs and I ignored them.
No man keeps a picture of a woman on his dresser that isn’t his wife.
And there was his wife, on those back roads, heading in the direction of his cabin. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to do the math on this.
Laz was married.
I had just been his side piece.
9
Laz
I returned to my cabin feeling a little guilty but I couldn’t think of any way I could have handled it better. I wasn’t wrong to have left to Ayla like that, was I?
The knot in my gut said otherwise. I had handled the entire situation poorly.
Evening had fully fallen over the trees and I realized that I was starving. We never had gotten around to eating after breakfast that morning. The remnants of Ayla’s attempts at dinner lay in the sink and I realized I was grinning as I studied it. I would have liked to see what she would have come up with if I’d given her the chance.
I felt a little disloyal eating without Ayla as I pulled out some ground meat from the freezer and a can of stewed tomatoes. It was a little warm for chili but it would keep me for the week ahead.
A strange feeling of loneliness embraced me when I thought about what was coming for me, although I couldn’t say why. It wasn’t like I wasn’t used to being alone. I had built my entire life around it, hadn’t I?
Maybe seeing Ayla wasn’t such a good idea after all. Maybe I needed to keep my distance from her and let her go. There was no future for us anyway.
Then why couldn’t I get her out of my mind?
The softness of her skin played in my mind as I fussed around the little house, straightening out the mess Ayla and I had made. I hadn’t even realized we done so much damage in such a short time.
I guess she damaged me in more ways than one.
The sound of tires against the dirt outside caught my attention and I hurried toward the window, my heart beating with unfounded anticipation. There was no way Ayla had come back, was there?
Certainly she wouldn’t be driving.
Still, I couldn’t help but be excited when I saw an unfamiliar vehicle pull toward the house, the headlights blocking me from seeing the face of the driver.
Wiping my hands on a tea towel, I moved toward the door, a smile on my face.
“I was just thinking about you,” I cried, sure it was Ayla, a smile on my face. I mean, who else could it be in a vehicle I didn’t recognize? I froze in place when the door fully opened and I was staring at someone I had never expected to lay eyes upon again in my life.
Or maybe I’d just hoped I wouldn’t.
“El!” I choked, wondering if I had fallen back asleep and was having some bizarre dream, stemmed from the shame of sleeping with another woman.
Don’t be an idiot. Ayla isn’t the first person you’ve slept with and you certainly don’t have any reason to feel guilty for sleeping with anyone. Helena was the one who divorced you and you should be counting your lucky stars, not feeling shame.
But Ayla was not like the other women I’d slept with. I’d known that from the minute I’d brought her home with me. How the hell had Helena sensed my happiness, fleeting as it might be?
“El, what are you doing here?” I demanded, regaining my composure. “How are you even here?”
She ey
ed me through wary green eyes without speaking right away but she looked around, gnawing on her lower lip as she took her surroundings. I realized then that Ayla had green eyes too but hers were nothing like that of my ex-wife. Helena’s crystalline emerald orbs glittered with a familiar evil that made my stomach lurch when I looked at her. Ayla had nothing but the purity of the fresh driven snow in her irises.
“It’s beautiful here, Laz,” she offered, avoiding my eyes. “I can see why you came here.”
A combination of emotions overwhelmed me—shock, gratitude and anger. I had finally moved on from what had happened between us, hadn’t I? Why was she coming back to haunt me?
At the same time, I was relieved to see her there, looking healthier and saner than I’d ever known her to be, even if that wasn’t a tall order to fill. It was hard to imagine Helena any worse than the last time I’d seen her. Could she be cured or had she escaped? I didn’t know which thought was more terrifying.
The Helena I knew wouldn’t have thought twice about breaking out of the hospital but somehow, I could see that this woman wasn’t the same woman I’d divorced, two years earlier.
Her eyes fixed on me and she gave me a weak smile.
“I know me being here is a shock to you, baby,” she sighed. “But I didn’t know how to reach you by phone or email.”
Why did I find that hard to believe? If she could find out where I lived, she could certainly should have been able to find out where the office was for her to call.
“What are you doing here, El? Do your doctors know you’re here?”
She laughed.
“I didn’t break out, if that’s what you’re asking,” she replied in an off-handed manner like this was a joke to her.
A night creature tittered in the trees, making me realize I was still gaping at her on my front porch but I wasn’t sure I wanted her to come inside.
“I’m not here to cause you any problems, Laz,” she sighed, looking contrite for the first time since she arrived. I guess I hadn’t given her the reaction she’d been expecting.
“What are you doing here?”