***
“Pack everything, Anna,” Carrie said to the maid who folded clothes and packed them in the trunk.
Anna looked surprised. “You’ll leave nothing here, Miss Carrie?”
“I don’t expect to return. Certainly not for a lengthy stay.”
Anna sighed.
Carrie turned to her. “You like Elm Park?”
“I do. The staff have become like friends.”
“Any special one?”
Anna giggled. “No, Miss Carrie.”
The door opened, and Bella came in carrying a small, wriggling puppy in her arms. “I hoped you might stay a while longer, Carrie.”
Carrie stroked the pup’s head, and it licked her hand. “Are you permitted to bring Daisy into the bedchambers?”
“I’ll take her back in a minute.”
“We always knew this would happen, didn’t we, Bella? But you are traveling to London with us tomorrow for a holiday. Isn’t that exciting?”
Bella smiled wanly and put down the dog. “It is.”
“I must make sure the maid has packed the right clothes for you and Jeremy.”
“You won’t stay with us at Pennington Court, will you?”
“No, dearest. I must remain with Gwen. She is my chaperone. I doubt you’ll have time to miss me. You’ll be busy visiting all the wonderful places Nicholas has in store for you. But I promise to see you often before you come back.” Carrie put down a pair of gloves she’d been examining. “You’ll be happy here at Elm Park, won’t you, Bella?”
“I shall miss you dreadfully,” Bella said. “But this is home to me now. I’m very fond of Nicholas. Aren’t you, Carrie?”
“I am. Yes.”
“And guess what I found in the attic? A harp!”
Carrie looked up from the blue spencer in her hands, which needed a stitch. “Oh, but didn’t Nicholas say…”
“He won’t let me play it in the attic.”
Bella perched on the bed, while Daisy tugged at one of Carrie’s slippers.
“No, I thought not.”
“He has promised to have the harp brought down to the music room so that I can practice there.”
Carrie raised her eyebrows. “He did? How kind of him.”
“Why are you so surprised? He is always kind.” Bella laughed. “Unless Jeremy puts a hole in his baize or wants to ride Prince.”
“He is perfectly right. Jeremy must learn to respect things, and that horse is dangerous.”
Bella jumped off the bed and scooped up her dog. “After I take Daisy back, I’ll go and see if the harp is there yet. I can’t wait to play it.”
“I’m pleased for you, dearest.” Nicholas’s change of mind had surprised her. Carrie wondered how it would be between them when they met at dinner. She had woken with a headache, as he had prophesied, but she wasn’t about to tell him. She flushed furiously at her brazen behavior. Would he think she behaved like a common trollop? He must, for she undoubtedly had. It must have been the fairies, she thought with a shake of her head. The movement caused a sharp ache, and she put a hand to her forehead with a soft moan. Fairies were a bad influence. It was said they played horrid games on humans.
“Did you say something, Miss Carrie?”
“No, Anna. Can you fix the button on this blue spencer? It has come loose. I must see Lady Penelope. She is leaving soon, and as she did not bring her maid with her, she may have need of my assistance.”
Aunt Penelope had several small tasks for her. As Carrie worked, she said, “You are returning to London?”
“Yes, tomorrow, Aunt.”
“I see. I thought perhaps…?”
Carrie paused, a shawl in her hands, while a flush rose up her neck. “What, Aunt Penelope?”
“When I heard you two in the corridor last night, I had expected... Well, never mind, an old woman’s imaginings. The moon was so bright, it shone through the curtains, and I couldn’t sleep. They don’t fit the windows properly. I must speak to the housekeeper.”
“Nicholas will be ready to take you home as soon as he returns from his ride with Jeremy. I shall see to it now.” Carrie was glad to draw her aunt’s attention away from any embarrassing questions. But as she left the room, she wondered what Aunt Penelope had expected.
An hour later, Nicholas left with her aunt in his curricle.
The day dragged by slowly. Carrie spent an hour in the music room, while Bella played the harp. She played a few pieces herself, but it soon failed to entertain her.
At dusk, Nicholas still had not arrived home. It was dark when Carrie heard the horses and ran to the window. His curricle, lit by lamps, passed by on its way to the stables. She checked her appearance in the mirror. She’d chosen one of her most flattering gowns, a pale lilac trimmed with bands of white satin, to give her confidence. After she tied a lilac ribbon in her hair, she hurried out.
She met Nicholas on the stairs.
“I’m sorry to be late,” he said. “I told Armand to put dinner back an hour, just in case.” He met her gaze. “How are you, Carrie?”
“Fine. But you must be tired.” Despite her plan to appear calm and composed, she found herself gripping hold of the banister. Was he going to refer to that, here?
“I hope you managed a few hours of sleep?”
“I did, thank you. My fault, I fear. I am sorry, Nicholas. Wine does not agree with me, I’ve discovered.”
“Don’t be.” He smiled. “I’m not.”
She toyed with a lock of hair, and it fell loose against her cheek. “Oh, dear. I must look a fright.”
He reached across and tucked the lock behind her ear. “Impossible.”
She summoned her last shred of dignity. “Did Lady Penelope enjoy the trip home in the curricle?”
“She appeared to. I had intended to take the coach, but she wouldn’t hear of it. Her husband had been an excellent whip hand. And it quite took her back.”
Carrie grinned. “She would approve of your skills.”
“I must have come up to muster, as I suffered none of her harsh criticisms. Even when I reversed the horses because a dray had lost its load of hay, and it became necessary to take a back road for several miles.” He grinned. “Rough going it was, too.”
“You must expect my aunt to return for another visit then.”
“I don’t think so without you here to assist with the lady’s entertainment.”
He didn’t mean it, of course. “Don’t let me keep you.” Carrie placed a foot on a lower stair tread.
His hand covered hers on the banister rail, holding her back. “I’d like to see you in the library before dinner.”
She tried to discern what it was about but failed. “Very well.”
“Allow me to wash and change. I’ll be there shortly. I expect those two youngsters are ready for their dinner.”
“The last time I saw them, they were at the billiard table while Jeremy practiced.”
Nicholas groaned. “I hope he doesn’t dig a hole in the baize.”
“I warned him you would be very cross should he do so.”
“I doubt that put the fear of God into him.” Nicholas shook his head and left her, continuing up the stairs.
Carrie began down, the banister rail cold beneath her fingers. What did Nicholas wish to talk about? He obviously intended to smooth things over between them. To have them go on as before and remain friends. Reaching the last step, she paused, chewing her bottom lip. It appeared this was how it would be in the future. An amicable friendship until she married. And then she would hardly see him except to discuss Bella and Jeremy. Until Bella came to live with her, and Jeremy left school, and then…nothing.
Carrie stepped down onto the floor. Somehow, she must find the courage to smile and be agreeable and not have him doubt her decision to return for the Season. She would hate him to be uneasy about her.
She entered the empty library and sat stroking the dog. Nicholas was not long. His expression was serious as he crossed the floo
r to her. “I’ve received a letter from Lord Ludlow.”
Her heart sank. “Oh? What does he say?”
“Ludlow didn’t mention it? He asks for permission to call on you and expresses hopes for your marriage.”
She thought back. “Ludlow did say something to me, but I was distracted by Uncle Simon, and then Gwen dragged me away.”
“I shall see him in London. What do you want me to tell him?”
“Will you?” If she must marry, Ludlow would suit her as much as any man. “He is amiable and kind.”
“I believe he is,” Nicholas said.
She took a deep breath. “Then you wouldn’t object to the marriage?”
“Not if you wish it.”
“I shall have to think about it, Nicholas.”
“You don’t love him?”
“No.” She raised her eyebrows. “But perhaps I’ll grow to love him or grow fond of him in any event.”
“Carrie…”
She couldn’t talk about it. She feared her emotions would give her away. There had been enough of that. “We are late for dinner.” She rose and walked to the door. Nicholas let her go without comment.
Dinner was a quiet affair. Afterward, they retired to the music room where Bella played the harp. Nicholas praised her skill. Carrie was proud of her sister, too, when she played Greensleeves and sang in her pure, sweet voice.
When urged to play the piano, Carrie had to agree, but her performance was sadly lackluster.
Afterward, Scotty took Bella and Jeremy up to bed, and for a moment, Carrie was alone with Nicholas.
“Carrie,” he began. “Shouldn’t we talk about last night?”
Horror-struck, Carrie shook her head. She was strangely tongue-tied. She didn’t want to talk about Ludlow or last night. “I have one or two last-minute things I must attend to,” she managed to say and stood. “We have an early start for London in the morning.”
Nicholas quickly outpaced her before she reached the door. He placed a hand on her shoulder and raised her chin with finger and thumb, forcing her to look at him. “I think it’s necessary to clear the air.”
She stared into his worried gray eyes. What was there to say? She had an offer for her hand, which he’d made no objection to. Did he still intend to rehash what happened when she had thrown herself at him shamelessly, only to be rejected? Charmingly, and not without a struggle on his part, but still…
“I would rather not talk about it,” she said stiffly. “I came to my senses this morning. It must have been the wine, or perhaps those naughty fairies.” She forced a smile. “But I am quite recovered, I assure you. I’m looking forward to London very much. Gwen tells me she has many exciting engagements awaiting us. And I should like to see more of Lord Ludlow before I decide. There might be other gentleman in London, now, that I have yet to meet.”
“I’m sure there will be.” Nicholas dropped his hands. “You are happy then?”
She turned away. Happy? Not a description she would have used. “Oh, yes. I certainly shall be after a revitalizing night’s sleep.” Carrie yawned behind her hand and tried to avoid meeting his intense gaze, which always drew her to him. She would have to get over that very smartly.
When Nicholas opened the door for her, Giles waited outside in the corridor. She smiled at him. “Good evening, Giles.”
“Good evening, Miss Leeming.”
Carrie hurried away. On reaching her bedchamber, she sank into a chair and bent to remove her shoes while Anna laid out her nightgown. “I hope you can sleep tonight, Miss Carrie. It’s so exciting. London again, only imagine.”
“Yes,” Carrie said flatly. She stood to remove her gown. “London, again.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Their journey to London with Bella and Jeremy made conversation with Carrie, other than on the most mundane of subjects, impossible. When they stopped for luncheon and to change the horses at the coaching inn, he looked for an opportunity to speak to her alone but suspected she avoided him.
“You mentioned once you wished to visit Greece,” he said as they ate luncheon in the inn’s dining room.
“Father planned to return there before he grew ill. He promised to take me with him.”
“Did you still want to visit those places which inspired Keats to write his poems about love and death and the agonies of the human heart?”
Color spread over her neck and tinted her cheeks. She ducked her head. “I don’t believe I described his poetry quite like that. You’ve embellished it.”
“But you still want to visit Greece?”
She shrugged, distant and as unresponsive as a statue. “It was a dream.”
Nicholas gazed at her thoughtfully but didn’t pursue it. Bella and Jeremy took no notice of their conversation as they tucked into their roasted chicken.
Nicholas forked up his food while observing Carrie picking at hers. She didn’t seem eager to marry young Ludlow. Didn’t love the fellow.
Bella and Jeremy discussed how to spend their days in London. The exuberance of his two wards amused him. They found something entertaining in the simplest things. Nicholas looked forward to taking them around the city. He couldn’t remember when he’d felt like them, so light-hearted. He’d known contentment, but the pure joy of living had eluded him for most of his adult life. Was it possible to find it again? His gaze settled on Carrie. Holding onto the past because of irrational fears now seemed foolish. One must take life as it comes, the joys and the sorrows. Was it possible…?
“Nicholas?”
She’d caught him deep in thought. “Yes, sweetheart?”
She blushed at the endearment, while Bella giggled, and Jeremy looked scornful.
“You were miles away. Jeremy asked you a question.”
“What was it, Jeremy?”
As the boy peppered him with questions about London, suggesting ruins might be found within a day’s ride, Nicholas smiled at Carrie. “I believe there’s enough to see of great interest within the metropolis,” he said. “The Elgin Marbles and the Rosetta Stone at the British Museum. There are many interesting exhibitions to view there. I foresee long, exhausting days ahead. With a little more than a week remaining before you return to school, I intend to keep my promise to you, Jeremy. We shall visit the Roman ruins at Whitcombe.”
Nicholas winked at Carrie when Jeremy at last fell silent and, with a look of awe, picked up his knife and fork to finish his meal.
He was ridiculously pleased when Carrie’s eyes met his, shining with approval.
After they settled into the coach again, Bella and Jeremy continued their discussion of what places they first wanted to see. Bella wished to see the animals at the Tower, while Jeremy preferred the museum.
Nicholas approved of Carrie’s fetching straw bonnet decorated with silk bluebells. The rogue lock of hair had once again escaped its pins. A sign she was nervous. He leaned forward and tucked the curl behind her ear.
She blushed. “Oh, thank you.”
“Not at all. The day it stays in place, I will know you are content.”
Her eyebrows met in a complexed frown. “I’m not sure of your meaning.”
Bella and Jeremy had stopped arguing to watch them with interest.
Nicholas smiled. “I remain hopeful of showing you soon, and Carrie? Don’t accept Ludlow,” he said. “It’s far too soon.”
She searched his eyes. “I think you are right.”
Jeremy continued with his reason for them to go first to the museum, while Bella, Nicholas noticed, had fallen silent. Her gaze rested on his with speculation and hope.
That young lady would turn his hair gray one day, he suspected, amused.
***
Nicholas hadn’t visited them at Gwen’s townhouse for several days. Nor had he attended the rout, the soiree, or the luncheon card party where Ludlow and other gentlemen danced attendance on her. He was in her thoughts every night when she wearily climbed into bed. What were they doing? She longed to know and wished she
were with them.
Although he’d made no promise, she had expected him to call. He had promised to as the coach approached London, while Bella and Jeremy dozed. The expression of intent in his eyes had made her pulse race. Had she imagined it? But surely he would want to see how she managed Ludlow. Carrie had been holding off Ludlow because Nicholas had told her to wait until she was sure. But tonight, she must either encourage his advances or let him down as gently as she could. She had decided on the latter. It wouldn’t be fair to marry him. She would never love anyone but Nicholas. What a sorry state of affairs.
This evening was her first masked ball. Carrie had chosen her costume carefully. She would go as Titania, Queen of the fairies from Shakespeare’s play. A crown of spring flowers decorated her hair, and she wore her white and gold evening gown.
Guests, dressed in a variety of costumes from the demure to the outrageous, filled Lady Moore’s ballroom. They laughed and cavorted beneath the bright streamers. Carrie didn’t know the gentleman who danced the quadrille with her, for they had not been introduced. He wore a pirate’s costume, and a mask hid much of his face. But he was an amusing partner, making sly observations about some of the costumes.
He returned her to her seat, made his bows to Gwen and herself, and left them.
Gwen wore a milkmaid costume with an apron and frilly white mobcap. “Did you like Lord Frankstone? He’s quite charming.”
Carrie picked up her fan and slowly wafted it before her warm face. “Was that who he was? Yes, he was droll.”
“Frankstone couldn’t hide his identity behind a mask. Not with that flame-colored hair.” Gwen looked disappointed. “I thought you might like him. He is more amusing than Ludlow.”
Carrie was immediately contrite. “I am sorry, Gwen. I must be a great disappointment to you and Nellie. But none of these men appeal.”
Gwen cast her a sideways glance. “Do you believe you might meet one who does?”
She noticed Gwen’s shrewd expression her blue mask failed to hide.
“I certainly hope so. I imagine I’ll know as soon as I meet him.”
Gwen waved her fan, her gaze intense through the slits in her blue bask. “Perhaps you’ve already met him?”
Never Dance with a Marquess (The Never Series Book 2) Page 21