by Frankie Love
“Fuck. You know what, this is enough for me to deal with, okay?”
“Understood,” Kirby says. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”
I end the call and pull myself out of the chair.
I’m exhausted, still haven’t changed my clothes from yesterday or taken a shower.
But damn, I don’t think I need a shower right now.
Right now, I need to take a fucking bath.
TESS
When Jack pushes open the door, the noise wakes me from sleep. My head is resting against the lip of the large sunken tub, and the jets surrounding it create a bubbling bath like I’ve never had before. It was easy to let the steam and hot water lull me to sleep.
“Hey, Tess,” Jack says, sitting on the edge of the tub. He has a bottle of white wine tucked under his arm and two glasses in his hand. “Want some Pinot gris?”
“Sure, that sounds nice.” I sit up, my torso covered in the bubbles that have settled on the surface of the water. “Did you ever get a chance to eat? You left Emmy’s before Ricky finished making brunch.”
“I ate a granola bar a minute ago, and I have a frozen pizza we can warm up for dinner. Can you believe it’s already four in the afternoon?”
“I can. This day has felt really long, actually.”
“Sorry.” Jack pours the wine and hands a glass to me. “I’ll just let you finish in here.”
I shake my head. “Don’t go.”
“I thought we were in a massive fight.” He cocks an eyebrow at me.
“I don’t even know why we’re fighting,” I tell him. “Because, look, whatever is going on between us isn’t love, but it also isn’t nothing.”
“No, it isn’t.” Jake clinks his glass against mine.
“You were so pissy with me at Emmy’s. When you realized I hadn’t told her anything about my past.”
“I was pissed. With reason. I don’t get the secrecy. And I just spoke with my publicist, Lola.”
“Yeah?” I ask, taking a sip of my wine to avoid his gaze. “And what did she say?”
“She said she couldn’t dig up a single fact about you. I’m guessing your lease isn’t even in your name, Tess.”
“It’s not.” I sigh, then take another drink of the chilled white wine. “I may have kept that fact from Emmy and Claire, but I’m not keeping it from you. I didn’t tell them because I don’t want to burden my friends.”
“And me, I’m not your friend?”
“No,” I tell him. “You’re not.”
“What am I. then?”
“That is what I’m trying to figure out. Do you want to just be fuck-buddies? Do you want me to be your mistress? Your sex-pet? Were you mad earlier because I didn’t just bend over and say yes?”
“I don’t want you to be those things, Tess. I’m not that guy.”
“What guy are you, then? You’re one of the most famous DJs in the world, and right now, you’re hanging out with. Me. Jack, I’ve got nothing on Ashley Fast.”
“Thank God for that.” Jack sets down his wine. “Listen, I don’t know what you and me are. Hell, I don’t even know who you are. But I do know I’m something to you.”
He kneels before the tub, looking at me, and all I want in that moment is to feel his lips on mine. But I know he deserves more than that from me.
“If you didn’t want to tell your friends anything because you didn’t want to burden them,” he says. “Why did you tell me?”
“Because you’re the first man I’ve ever met who might genuinely be able to lighten the load.”
“I want to help, Tess.”
“I know you do.”
His sincerity is so gentlemanly, so unobtrusive. He isn’t trying to get me into bed, or even get me to talk. He’s just here, with me. And that means more than he knows.
“Then we’re more than friends, but not lovers?” he asks.
“I guess so.” I want to thank him for everything he’s doing right now to put me at ease on a night when I should be all broken up. “But tonight, I think we should make an exception,” I tell him.
“Exception to what?”
“Well.” I give him a sly smile. “Maybe we should be fuck-buddies, just so we know what we’re giving up.”
I spread my legs in the tub, sitting up straighter so my breasts bob in the water.
“Oh, fuck, girl.”
“Are you coming in?” I ask, sugary-sweet. “Because I’m pretty sure my pussy needs petting.”
“Oh, I bet your dirty pussy is getting nice and clean in this bath,” he says, standing and taking off his pants. He lifts his tee shirt over his head, and his bare chests causes my core to tingle in anticipation.
His cock is full of anticipation, too, and when he climbs in the huge tub my hands immediately reach for it, anxious to feel his hardness, to have something to hold onto.
“It feels so good in here,” he groans, as he sinks into the tub. He sits across from me, and his legs rest on the outside of mine. It’s so intimate, the both of us so close to one another.
“I’ve never taken a bath with a man.”
“But you have with a girl?” He smirks. “Tell me everything.”
“Oh, shut up,” I tell him, laughing. “That’s not what I meant. I’ve never taken one with a woman either. Have you?”
“Are you asking about me being in a tub with a man or with a woman?”
“Both.”
“I think talking about previously taken baths is going to kill the mood,” he says, shaking his head.
“Touché.” I sink lower in the tub, covering my head with the water. When I emerge he is looking at me so tenderly that any fear of what might come next is far from my mind. I don’t know if he’ll ever understand how grateful I am just to be in this moment with him. “Thank you Jack, for this. I really needed it.”
“I know you did, girl,” he says.
I move toward him, resting myself on his chest. His thickness is between my legs, taunting me, and I grind myself again him, pleasuring us both.
My pussy has been tingling since he dropped his pants, and I want him in me—to fill me up, to make me whole.
I take him in me, pressing him into my entrance, lying on top of him in the steaming bath.
“Oh, God,” I moan as he fills me up. “Jack, you feel so good in me.”
He runs his hands over my ass, kissing me as he does. Our mouths collide in a rush of desire, our tongues entwined. He presses his mouth against my ear, causing a deep stirring within me.
“Girl, your pussy is so tight. Fuck, me, baby,” he says, breathing warm air in my ear.
I move up and down, and his cock presses against me, causing me to pant in release.
I run my hands over his solid chest, and his mouth finds my breasts, sucking on them, around and around, completely undoing me, until all I can do is scream out in orgasm.
“Baby,” I moan. “Don’t stop fucking me.”
“Oh, girl, I won’t. Not ever.” He thrusts in me. Water is overflowing from the tub, splashing against the floor as we grind against one another. We come, hard, and I catch my breath, already dreaming of round two.
Chapter Thirteen
JACK
The next morning, Tess and I wake around noon in a post-sex glow. We stayed up late—fucking, eating frozen pizza, watching TV, and fucking some more.
If a sex tape and leaked story result in a sex stay-cation, sign me up for more.
We roll out of bed looking for food and coffee. In the kitchen, I make coffee and Tess drops slices of bread in the toaster.
“Doesn’t this feel weird, just having zero responsibility?” she asks, getting peanut butter and honey from the pantry. “Not having anyone want us to be in a certain place, at a certain time?
“Right?” I hand her a cup of coffee, and then take a sip of mine. “I don’t have another show for a few weeks but, still, I usually end up flying somewhere between gigs to do a cameo.”
“But you don’t have to do that right now?�
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“Nah,” I say. “I mean, I was going to meet up with Macklemore for a pop-up performance in Key West this weekend, but I’m gonna have Kirby cancel it. I never wanted to go anyway; Kirby set it all up.”
Tess smirks. “You’re so fancy, Jack. Did you grow up like that, knowing famous people, having connections?”
“Not at all. My parents live in the middle of nowhere, the most low-key people I’ve ever known.”
“So let me get this straight,” she says, spreading peanut butter across the whole wheat. “You grow up in the woods or whatever, and then one day just decide to be a world-class DJ?”
I sit on a barstool, enjoying the view. Tess is sexy as hell in a big white robe—especially since I know there’s nothing underneath.
“I didn’t just decide,” I say. “I always played music. Grew up on the piano. But when I moved to LA, I realized pretty quickly no one cared about classical shit. They wanted beats. So I went with it. I figured playing at clubs was better than not playing at all.”
“Do you miss it?”
“The classical stuff?” I shake my head. “Naw, I don’t play that stuff. But I do write a lot of music these days. Stuff I wish I could play, that I’d be excited about performing. But it’s not what KMG is interested in, that’s for sure. Kirby won’t even give them my stuff.”
“Really?” Tess tilts her head. “That’s insane. Show it to them yourself.”
“No, I don’t want any drama.”
Tess nods, handing me my toast and keeping whatever she is thinking to herself.
“What?” I ask.
“So are you gonna sign this offer they gave you?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“You tell me, Jack.”
“The truth is, I don’t know what I’m gonna do. Ashley said I’d be insane to walk away from it, and I know I’d feel bad for Kirby. He took a chance on me, and this would be his big payday, too.”
“I get that. Sacrificing what you want for someone else.” She bites her lip, then continues. “The question is, though … is what someone else wants for you enough to give up what you want for yourself?”
The kitchen is quiet, and in some ways this seemingly bubbly girl has cut straight to the heart of things. She doesn’t tiptoe, or beat around the bush. She says the scary truth, asks the hard questions. When I’m with her, there isn’t room to run.
“You know about that, Tess?” I ask her. “Making that hard choice?”
“Yeah, but I’m the selfish one. I took what I wanted.” She leans against the island, looks straight at me.
“And what was that?”
“I wanted out, so I left.”
“Out? What do you mean, Tess? Out of what?”
Just then a roar from the street below breaks our intimate moment.
“What was that?” she asks, her eyes wide.
“Sounds like tanks rolling down the road.” We walk toward the wall of windows to see what is happening. A massive motorcycle club weaves through the street, easily fifty bikes in an impressive diamond-shaped riding pattern.
“No,” Tess says, stepping away from the window. “It can’t be. They can’t have gotten here so fast.”
“Who? What do you mean?”
Tess’s face has gone white; her whole body shakes.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Jack,” she says, trembling. “I ran from my family because they’re the Anarchy Motorcycle Gang. And they’re here. Here for me.”
Chapter Fourteen
TESS
The roaring bikes below send a wave of memories through me.
I steady myself with Jack’s arm, reaching for him, holding tight. Closing my eyes, I blink away my past, but it’s surfacing faster than I can stop it.
Me, forced to clean.
Me, forced to beg.
Me, forced to fuck.
My life on the compound was never easy, never good. There aren’t any memories that feel right, feel whole.
It was all shattered chaos. Strong men and submissive women. Angry guys and lost girls.
I wasn’t like the rest of them.
I was Daddy’s Little Girl, but what good did that do me, in the end?
In the end it wasn’t my father I hurt.
It was my mother.
And that makes me either a sinner or a saint.
Depends on the day.
I read the self-help books, desperate to find a way out of the past, a way to grieve, to let go, to heal. But it’s easier when the Brotherhood is three states away.
Not as easy when they’re rolling down the road, fifteen stories below, looking for me.
“Tess, what is going on?” Jack says, pulling me tight against him. I claw at his back, holding on so tight. My quaking heart beats so fast as it presses against Jack’s. And this is where I want to stay.
I want him to protect me, to be the man I always wanted and never knew I’d find. The man who won’t hurt me, because Jack Harris wouldn’t hurt a fly. The man who stayed with Ashley even though she was a witch, the man who will sign a ten-year contract because he wants to do right by his agent. The man who honors, protects, works hard, and knows how to commit.
He’s the man I need, the man I want.
He kisses my forehead. “You’ve got to talk, Tess.”
But what do I say? This is the moment I’ve been terrified of. This is the moment that will force me back to where I came from.
The moment that will force me from Jack’s arms, because once he knows he’ll never, ever look at me the same way again. He might not want to look at me at all.
“I can’t be here. They’re going to come after me, Jack.”
“Who?”
“The bikers. They’re my family. They’re the people who are looking for me ... who I knew would find me.”
I fall apart in another puddle of tears. Jack must realize the pain I’m in, the pain that seeing those motorcycles causes, because he kisses me hard on the mouth, shocking me with the passion he evokes even when I’m at my lowest.
“Then we have to go,” he says, without hesitation. “We have to get you somewhere safe.”
“You think they could get in here?” I ask. “Into your apartment?”
“You tell me, Tess. I don’t know these people, I don’t know why you’re running from them, what they might do. I just know you’re shaking; you’re terrified.”
I remember seeing caches of guns on the compound. I remember the look of hatred in the eyes of the men I lived with. They lived for vengeance.
And my mother’s blood is on my hands.
The woman my father loved above all else—certainly more than he loved me.
“They’re going to try to do one of two things,” I tell him. “Kill me, or kidnap me. And I honestly don’t know what would be worse.”
“Fuck this.” Jack grabs his phone, calls Kirby on speakerphone. “I need a plane. And a helicopter to my building. And, Kirby, I need it now. I’ll explain later.”
“Where are you going?” Kirby asks.
“Not now, damn it. It’s an emergency.”
“Is this about the girl?”
“Yes,” Jack says. “We’re going to my parents’. It’s the safest place I know.”
“Okay. Can you get to the top of the building securely?”
“The security guys are still here. They’ll be my backup.”
“Should I call the cops?” Kirby asks.
Jack looks at me. I shake my head wildly.
“No,” Jack says. “I’ll call you when we get to Washington.”
“You call me sooner than that,” Kirby insists. “I want an update when you get in the air. Understood?”
“Will do.” Jack ends the call. “I’m going to pack a bag. You don’t have anything, do you?”
“We’re really going to go, just like that?” I ask, still shocked that he’s manning up and taking care of me, of everything.
“Do we have a choice?” he asks.
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p; “No.”
“Then yes, we’re going.”
He kisses me, harder this time. As if the kiss is promising something.
But I’m too scared to ask what the promise might be.
JACK
Her dark eyes tell me there’s a hell of a lot she isn’t saying, and that scares me. Fuck, there must be a reason she ran away, why she’s shaking, why she has transformed from a woman with bright eyes and a big smile into someone on the verge of collapse.
It doesn’t take much for me to come to a decision. I don’t have a show for a few weeks—and, damn it, even if I did this is more important. I’ve screwed Tess over with the article and then the fucking sex tape. She can’t go home to get her shit, can’t go to work. Can’t leave my sight.
I owe her this much.
And, damn, maybe I just want to be the hero, fucking wrap my arms around her and tell her I got this. Maybe I just want to be the man she needs.
Is wanting that so fucking bad?
“My parents live on a small island in Washington State,” I tell her. “You have to take a ferry to get there. No one will be able to hurt you, I swear.”
She swallows, wiping her tears, catching her breath.
“Thank you.”
“It’s nothing.”
“Shut up, Jack,” she says, tears in her eyes. “Right now, it’s everything.”
I pack a duffle bag, and take her hand. The security guys flank us as we take the stairs to the rooftop landing pad.
“I can’t believe your apartment has a landing pad,” Tess says, dazed.
The discrepancy between our lives surfaces again, but I know once she’s in my mom’s comfortable kitchen, fishing on my dad’s boat, she’ll feel at ease.
“Do you want to give us intel on the situation?” the head security guard asks as the copter lands.
I glance over at Tess, hoping she’ll say something so I don’t overshare.
She doesn’t speak; the question alone causes her eye to fill with tears once more. I hate seeing her emotional, but at the same time I’m getting a little frustrated that she won’t talk and tell me the reason this fucking posse is after her.