by Susan Meier
“Because I know so much about you?”
“Because there’s something between us.” He took another step, forcing her to shift Bella to the left or let the poor baby get squished.
“I don’t like unusual things. I don’t like unexpected or unpredictable things.”
Her breath lodged in her throat. They absolutely could not get any closer.
“So you don’t like that you feel something for me?”
“No. I do not.”
“Well, thanks.”
He chuckled again. “You should thank me. You shouldn’t want me to be interested. I don’t date. I have lovers. I hurt women foolish enough to feel anything for me.”
She took a step back, putting plenty of space between them, believing the air had been cleared and they were moving on. “Thanks for the warning.” She handed the baby to him, but stopped short of giving her over. “You know, we’ve been carrying Bella around all day. It might be a good idea to let her roam a bit.” She stooped and put the baby on the white shag carpet between the two red sofas. “How’s this, sweetie?”
Patting the thick carpet, Bella gurgled up at her.
“Are you sure she’ll be okay down there?”
“I’ve had her on this carpet plenty of times.” She rose. “But you’re going to make sure she’s okay while I’m gone.”
“I am?”
“Yes. I’ll be five minutes, tops, while I gather a few things. You just have to make sure she doesn’t go too far or bump her head or anything like that.”
He glanced around. “Okay.” He caught her gaze again. “But we’re not done talking about this attraction.”
“I think we are. You’ve warned me off enough that I’m not even worried about it.”
“Liar.”
She snorted a laugh. “What? You think you’re so irresistible that—”
He caught her by the waist and hauled her to him. Before she could take her next breath, his lips were on hers. Soft yet demanding, they moved over her mouth until she found herself opening her lips beneath his. He took advantage. His tongue plunged into her mouth.
Desire ripped through her as her body became boneless. Her arms snaked around his neck. He tightened his grip on her waist and the kiss went on...
And on...
Sending sensations careening through her body, making her long for more.
Until Bella screeched.
Claire bounced away like a teenager caught kissing on the front porch by her parents.
Matt sucked in a breath. “Sorry.”
With arousal pulsing through her, his apology didn’t make sense. She blinked at him. “Sorry?”
“The kiss wasn’t supposed to go that far. It was to prove a point.” He rubbed his hand across the back of his neck. “I was hoping that...” He winced. “I thought if I kissed you we’d see the attraction was ordinary, and we’d...”
His words acted like water on a campfire. “You hoped I was a really crappy kisser?”
He winced. “Something like that.”
She made a sound of disgust. This guy couldn’t be any more infuriating if he tried. How could she be so attracted to him? “I’m going to get my things.”
She turned to walk away but he caught her arm.
“I am sorry. But everything’s getting confused. I’m trying to tell you that I’m not a family man, not the settling-down kind. Being with Bella is making me look like I might be...or maybe I should be. But I’m not.”
Her face grew tight with an emotion so strong yet so foreign she couldn’t even describe it. She’d never had a man tell her he was attracted to her as he tried to talk himself out of it. She wasn’t sure if she was humiliated or infuriated.
“I get it.”
“I don’t think you do. The family reunion I’m going to in Texas is a joke. My family is riddled with secrets and lies.... No, I take that back. My family was built on secrets and lies. I became calloused to survive and I have survived. I’ve thrived. You’re not like the sophisticates I date. And if you get involved with me, you will end up hurt.”
She straightened her shoulders. What did he think she was? A lovesick schoolgirl? Ben had cured her of that. “Got it.” She turned to go, but pivoted around again. “And just for the record, you might be a great kisser, but I’d already realized you’re not a great catch. You’re blunt. You’re rude. You’re absolutely positive you’re always right. Well, this is one time you aren’t. I wouldn’t date you on a lost bet. You’re everything I avoid in a man. I learned that lesson young because my dad was exactly like you. Cool, efficient. Silent most of the time. And if that isn’t enough, I had a boyfriend who used me. So don’t think I’m helping you because of your supposed charm. I’m helping you for Bella’s sake.” She took the two steps that separated them and got in his face. “You...are...perfectly...safe...with...me.”
With that she walked away and Matt scrubbed his hand across his mouth. Well, that hadn’t gone well. He’d had the best of intentions when he’d warned her off. She was a nice girl and she was attracted to him. And he didn’t want her to get hurt. Yet his good intention of sparing her feelings had actually ended up making her mad.
He blew his breath out on a sigh and walked over to Bella. Stooping down so he was on her level, he leaned in and whispered, “She’d probably kill me if I told her that she was even sexier when she yelled at me.”
Bella squawked. He picked her up and rose with her. “What? You don’t like the adults not paying attention to you?”
She laughed and patted his face and he smiled at her. But his smile quickly faded. Claire was right. He really was getting accustomed to this kid. He hadn’t thought twice about picking her up. Didn’t mind holding her now.
So maybe this was going to work? Maybe he could be a good dad?
Claire came out of her bedroom carrying a small duffel bag. Matt hardly noticed it. Seeing her hair down around her shoulders, fat curls that bounced when she walked and her plain top that hugged her curves before it stopped at the waistband of her low-riding jeans caused his mouth to water. Memories of their kiss thundered through him. Had he been a bit hasty in warning her off?
No. He’d been fair. He needed help with Bella and Claire was obviously providing it. Because she cared about Bella—not him. Not even his money. Good Lord, she hadn’t even hinted about compensation.
He frowned. It was the first time since he’d gotten rich that somebody had just helped him.
Grabbing a bright red leather jacket, she said, “Let’s go,” and headed for the door.
He scurried after her. His gaze automatically fell to her bottom showcased in low-cut jeans, and inwardly he groaned. But he hadn’t made a mistake in warning her off. He needed her. Her reward for helping him would be that he wouldn’t hurt her.
When they reached the limo, Jimmy jauntily opened the door for Claire and she smiled at him, said, “Thanks,” a little breathlessly, and Matt’s blood pressure rose.
He handed Bella into the limo and Claire strapped her in the car seat as he settled on the seat across from her. A bit miffed that she’d sort of flirted with Jimmy again, he decided not to talk to her.
But after ten minutes of silence in the car, he realized she wasn’t talking to him.
His heart squeezed. But he ran his hand down his face. This was ridiculous. They’d both outlined very good reasons why they should stay away from each other. Hadn’t his heart and hormones been paying attention?
Claire tapped on the round padded thing that kept Bella securely in the car seat. “Hey, sweet girl.”
The baby gurgled a laugh.
“We should have remembered to bring something for her to play with.”
He grudgingly peeked over. “Like what?”
“She came with a bear and I bought her two rattles and a chew toy. They’re in her diaper bag.”
“We’ll give them to her when we get back.”
She smiled. “Okay.”
He simmered. She seemed very happy. Re
laxed. Almost as if their kiss hadn’t happened. Or maybe she was happy that they’d cleared the air between them?
Well, fine. He was happy, too. God knew he had a million other things to think about, worry about, stress over, if he wanted to be stressed.
His already unhappy family had been increased by four half siblings. The children his real father had had with the woman he married after Matt’s mother had returned to New York. And he had to meet those people in nine short days. For his sisters’ sake, he’d promised to be nice.
If he wanted to obsess over anything, he should be figuring how he intended to keep his promise to Ellie, Charlotte and Alex. Having all recently settled down—Charlotte with a baby even—they were now all about family and wanted him to be part of that, too. He shouldn’t be worried that the current woman in his company was the first woman in a long time to not only reject him, but also to stand up to him.
Great. Now he was thinking about her again.
Maybe the mistake was agreeing to let her spend the night...
In the little room next to his bedroom...
This was going to be peachy.
CHAPTER FIVE
BY THE time they arrived at the mansion, it was dark. Jimmy drove the limo into the garage, and as soon as it stopped, Claire reached for the buckles and snaps to free Bella.
She carried Bella to the door as if she’d been to his house a million times, walked through and headed to the kitchen.
Matt stayed on her heels, not exactly sure what he was supposed to do. She took a bottle from the diaper bag, rinsed it, filled it with milk and walked out of the kitchen up the hall, toward the curved stairway in the foyer. “First a bath, then some milk, then it’s into bed with you, Missy.”
“It’s only eight.”
Walking up the stairs, she faced Matt. “She’s a baby. Babies go to bed early.”
“Did you ever stop to think that if you kept her up until ten, she’d sleep through the night?”
“You’re wishful thinking.”
She walked into his bedroom and stopped at the three side-by-side doors along the left wall. “Which door?”
“For?”
“The bathroom. She needs a bath, remember?”
“Middle one.”
She opened the door onto his master bath, and though she started to step in confidently, her foot faltered. “Good God.”
He ambled up behind her. “What?”
He didn’t think it was the Italian marble floor that stopped her. The double sinks were special, especially since there was a waterfall that ran down the brown, gray and white stone tiles behind them. But they didn’t usually earn a gasp. The huge shower was cool. He loved the showerhead that felt like rain and the jets that shot water out of any side or corner of the shower he wanted, but most people didn’t notice the wonders of the shower until they were in it.
So, she had to be gaping at the old-fashioned claw-foot tub.
Sitting on a one-foot marble rise with a solid-gold faucet, beneath a skylight that probably right now had a great view of the stars, the tub could be a showstopper.
“You bathe in that?”
“Well, I don’t want to walk around smelling like a wildebeest.”
“I guess you feel like Napoleon when you’re sitting in that thing.”
“Actually, I fancy myself more like Julius Caesar.” Happy to finally be in control again, he said, “I light a cigar, lay my arms along the rims, put my head back and look at the stars.”
She cautiously walked over to the tub. Her head craned back until she saw the skylight. “Ah.”
He snuck up behind her, whispered in her ear. “Pretty nifty, isn’t it?”
“This bathroom is bigger than my entire apartment.”
“Want to see the rain shower?”
She faced him, swallowing. “I’d just like to see a normal tub where I could bathe a baby.”
“She’d probably fit in the bowl sinks.”
“In front of the waterfall?” She glanced around again. “Sheesh. Man. Do you really need all this stuff?”
“It’s my reward.”
“Well, you must have worked your butt off to feel you deserved all this.”
“I did. And it makes me happy.”
It really did. Being in this room reminded him that this was what he’d been working for his whole life. The freedom to live his life as he wanted. His mom had lied to him about Cedric being his father. He’d never felt he fit into his own family. He had even become distant from his sisters, who didn’t care about real dads and pretend dads and bloodlines or lies. But he fit here. He was happy here. And some five-foot-seven slip of a woman wasn’t going to make him “think” he wanted something else out of life. Especially not after only a few hours.
Besides, she was here to help him with the baby, to show him the ropes. He didn’t want to waste this opportunity.
He strolled over to the first sink where she ran water while she pulled out a diaper and one-piece sleeper from the diaper bag one-handed.
“Here. Let me hold her.”
Not meeting his gaze, she handed the baby to him. “Thanks.” When the baby was securely on his arm, she said, “Is the linen closet around here?”
“What do you need?”
“Towels. A washcloth.”
He walked over to the corner, pressed a button and the wall opened. He pulled out two fluffy white towels and a washcloth. “Here you are.”
While he was gone, she’d removed a pink bottle, a little yellow bottle and a taller white container from the diaper bag.
“What are those?”
Taking the baby from him again, she said, “Lotions and powder. Baby wash. Nothing special.”
He frowned. Had that been a quaver in her voice?
“Are you okay?”
Removing Bella’s one-piece outfit, she said, “I’m fine.”
But not chatty. He knew he’d discouraged conversation in the limo, but she’d seemed fine, bossy even, until... He glanced around. Until they’d started talking about his tub? This bathroom?
Maybe he’d flaunted his wealth a bit too much. Or maybe his casual comments had seemed to her as if he was rubbing her nose in his success.
“Look, I’m sorry if I came across as an idiot talking about my tub. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“I’m not upset.”
“Your voice says you are.”
She sighed and sat naked Bella in the sink she’d filled with water. “Okay. I’m not upset as much as reminded of some things I’d rather not think about.”
“Ah. The bad boyfriend.”
“No, the distant dad.”
“Your distant dad had a big claw-foot tub?”
“Among other things.” She rinsed water along Bella’s tummy, and made the baby laugh. “My father was a successful businessman.” She slanted him a look. “Not anywhere near your caliber, but he did okay.” She shook her head. “He lived for the deal.”
Yet another reminder of why he shouldn’t get involved with women. He lived for the deal, too. And Claire’s current sadness was the reminder of the fallout of that kind of life. “I bet that thrilled your mother.”
“My mother died when I was six.”
“Oh.” That news shifted through him oddly. He could picture her. A little girl with big sad brown eyes and long brown ponytails, left alone by a dad who didn’t know how to care for her.
His stomach knotted and he understood why she was so sympathetic to Bella. Right then and there, he strengthened his commitment to be the best father he could for his little girl, even as his chest tightened with sorrow for Claire’s loss. “I’m sorry.”
She poured one of the gels onto the washcloth, worked it into suds and leisurely ran the cloth over Bella’s soft skin. “It’s certainly not your fault.”
“I was apologizing for bringing up unhappy memories.”
“It’s okay.”
It really wasn’t. Not just for Claire, but for him. He’d spent most
of his adult life upset over his mother taking him away from his real father and saddling him with a stepfather who didn’t want him, and then angry that his biological dad never tried to find him, to meet him—to anything.
But after hearing of Claire’s losses he felt like a heel.
He pointed toward the bedroom. “I’m going to go check on the crib, make sure that sheet is okay.”
She nodded. “Okay.”
Inside the bedroom, out of Claire’s sight, he ran his hand down his face. He got it. Lots of people had lives worse than his. But that didn’t diminish the fact that he had some problems. Not only did he have to meet four half siblings, but the twin and half sisters he’d been raised with would be in Texas, too. He had to meet his new siblings and deal with the old ones, when he was turned inside out about raising a baby because he’d lost Ginny. The one person who’d always loved him. Any other ex-wife would have been happy to be rid of him, but she’d kept him as a friend, made sure he had a part in her life even after she remarried. There was no one like Ginny who’d understood the real Matt Patterson and still liked him. True, she couldn’t be married to him but they had been friends. Good friends.
But now she was gone. And for the first time since he’d met Ginny, he was alone in the world.
Truly alone.
* * *
Claire lifted Bella out of the sink and rolled her in the thick fluffy white towel. She tickled her tummy and played with her a bit, but inside she was dying. The loneliness she’d felt after her mom’s death rolled over her as if it were yesterday, not decades ago. And she wished...well, she wished Matt would have comforted her. After that kiss, it was clear they both were attracted. Neither one could deny it. But he couldn’t find it in his heart to stay in the room and comfort her...or even really talk about her life.
Still, that was her luck with men. Her friends found good men, strong men, who knew how to love, how to comfort. She always seemed to be attracted to the self-absorbed guys.
Like Ben. He hadn’t really loved her. But she’d thought he had. And she’d loved his company. She loved having somebody to spend time with, somebody to think about the future with. But when he’d introduced her to his wife at her graduation—the day she’d believed he would propose to her—her whole world had fallen apart. Instead of proposing, he’d broken up with her. And not by saying, “I’m sorry. It didn’t work out.” No. He introduced her to his wife. A not-so-subtle way of saying, “Now, that you’re leaving the university, I have no need of you.”