“I know your heart,” Lizzie said breaking the silence. “I want what you want.”
“You know Lola saved me?”
“Yes. I know that you want to be with her, and I’m okay with that. It’s time to let me go. You can’t have us both. And since I’m dead,” she said smiling, “I think we know what your choice must be.”
“You really want me to let you go?” He just couldn’t believe she would ever want him to let her go. They had a deep love. She was to be his wife.
“I want you to let me go for two reasons. One, so you can stop tormenting yourself. So you no longer feel the guilt over my death.”
“I will always feel guilt over not being able to save you. That will never go away.”
“Yes, but in time, and with Lola’s help, you will learn to forgive yourself.”
“And the second reason?”
“I want to move on. I’m tired of being stuck here. Where I am going, I will still be able to watch over you, like a guardian angel. I heard it’s beautiful on the other side, and I can’t wait to see it.”
Rob gazed at the horizon as the dark closed in around him. “So this is really it? We are saying goodbye.”
“I think it’s long overdue,” she said with a reassuring smile. They stood and walked to meet each other in the middle of the table. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her closer to him until he could feel her pressed up against him.
“This is the last time I am going to feel you. The last time I am going to kiss you. You’re right. I have to live. I can’t give up, not even for you.”
“I knew you would see it my way,” she bantered, a reassuring smile playing on her lips. He looked her directly in the eyes as his glistened with unshed tears. “Goodbye Lizzie,” he exhaled swallowing the lump that rose in this throat.
“Goodbye Rob. I love you. Go. Live and let yourself be loved. Do it for me,” she said smiling up at him. He brought his lips to hers for a final, goodbye kiss. He kissed her with his entire being. He felt goose bumps line his arms. This was it; this was his last kiss with Lizzie, and he was damn lucky to be getting it. He opened his mouth and begged permission to enter hers with his tongue. She granted him permission and they kissed, open mouth, passionately until the sun finally set and the porch light no longer shone.
Chapter 28
Lola had Rob’s hand in hers waiting for any sign of movement. She had her forehead rested against their joined hands as she sat by his bedside in the uncomfortable chair. He had to wake up. He had to.
Lola recounted the moments in the hut in her mind. Those moments were the worst of her life. When she was in the hut, she heard the click of the gun, she thought she was dead, but she felt nothing. She heard a louder gun shot, one that pierced her ears. She turned at the sound and saw Rob fall to the ground. Tony was in the hut the second Rob hit the ground, and he shot that bastard Ortiz right in the head. She heard his round body hit the floor. She saw the blood flow from his head and mingle with the dirt on the floor. Then her shocked gaze turned to Rob. Rob lied there, unmoving, blood pooling from his head. The smell of so much blood had turned her stomach. The sight of the man she loved, her warrior, dead on the ground was too much.
Tony didn’t have to shoot the doctor as he was on his knees surrendering to Tony. She heard Tony speak into his radio.
“Rob’s down.” That was all he said as he approached her trembling body. She was in shock. “What’s going on?” she asked, confused.
“Rob’s been shot and you’re in shock, sweetheart,” Tony said with the utmost care. She felt lightheaded like she was going to faint. She couldn’t pass out now; she had to get to Rob.
Tony knew he had to get care for Lola and for Rob. He went to Rob and she scrambled, on her knees, to kneel beside him. She cradled Rob in her arms and said, “No. No. No,” over and over again as the tears streamed down her face. She was having his baby. He couldn’t die now. Within two minutes, the rest of the team was in the hut, and Tony was dragging her from Rob’s lifeless body. Other than Rob, Tyrrell was the only one with medical training. Tyrrell examined Rob and determined the bullet grazed his head. When they lifted Rob to carry him back to the RV, they noticed he had fallen on a large piece of rock which laid flat with the compact dirt floor. They deduced he must have hit his head on the rock and knocked himself unconscious.
A day and a half later they were back in Lewiston, and Rob was still unconscious. The doctor entered the room to examine Rob. He lifted his eyelids and shone a pen light into his eyes looking for dilation. When his eyes didn’t dilate, he looked at Lola who was now sitting at full attention.
“What is it?” Lola whispered to the doctor.
“The CT scan we did yesterday shows a subdural hematoma. There is swelling of the subdural tissue which is currently pressing on his brain. He will probably be unconscious until the swelling subsides.”
“How long will that take?” she asked breathless. He had to wake up soon; they had a lot to talk about.
“He could wake up in a week or in an hour. The CT scan showed rather severe swelling,” he said in his most comforting voice.
Great, no definitive answers. She hadn’t called her father or her friends. The second they disembarked the airplane, she was with the men as they rushed Rob to Lewistown General Hospital. They arrived yesterday and for most of the day, they conducted test after test on Rob. When they finally determined the cause of his state, they admitted him to the room. Lola had lied and said she was his fiancée so she would be able to stay with him. She had promised him she would be there for him, and she had meant it.
Yesterday and today gave her a great deal of time to think. Rob had saved her life, twice. Once from the unknown of being sold into slavery and a second time from being killed. He didn’t know it, but he had also saved the life of their unborn child.
She needed to see a doctor. After Rob woke up, she would make an appointment. She wanted him there every step of the way with her. She didn’t know if he wanted children. Having a child would mean he would have to change his lifestyle. She didn’t know if she could be with someone who put his life on the line all of the time, but that was who he was, and if that is what he wanted for himself, she had to trust he would always come back to her. If she was honest with herself, the dangerous aspect of his job was a major turn on for her. But the more she felt for Rob, the harder his job was to accept. What would Rob say? If only he would wake up. Before she told him she was pregnant, she had to talk to him about what ‘being his’ meant. She had to tell him she would never live under any man’s thumb. Ever again. Not like she did growing up under her father’s roof. She would have her freedom and if they couldn’t agree on that, then she would have to say goodbye to him and raise their baby on her own. She wouldn’t let this child be used to control her. She didn’t think Rob meant to keep her under his thumb, but she had to make sure.
The worst part of all of this was before she found out she was pregnant, she was falling in love with Rob; knowing she was having his baby cemented her love, cemented her to him.
∞
Rob heard people talking as if they were in another room. He heard whispers but couldn’t make out the words. The last thing he remembered was kissing Lizzie goodbye. He blinked once, but the light hurts his eyes and his head throbbed. Where was he? He wasn’t with Lizzie anymore. He had said his goodbye. He blinked again. “Lola,” he spoke through a dry mouth and throat. It sounded more like a croak then a word.
“I’m here, Baby. Open your eyes.”
“Lola,” he said again feeling her squeezing his hand. He blinked in rapid succession slowly bringing himself back into consciousness.
“Oh thank God,” Lola whispered as she flung herself into his arms. He raised his arms and hugged her. “I was so scared. I thought I lost you,” she cried into his chest. “I heard the gun shot and thought for sure you were gone.”
“What happened?” Rob asked confused. He coul
d still see his goodbye with Lizzie so clearly in his mind.
“You saved my life. Again. Then Ortiz shot you and you fell and hit your head on a rock. It knocked you unconscious. You have swelling in your brain.”
“How long have I been out?” he asked even more confused.
“Three days. It took us a day to get you here. You’re at Lewistown General.”
He thought back and the cloud from his mind began to dissipate. He tried to sit up forcefully. “Ortiz, he was going to kill you. There was a man with a gun pointed at your head.” She pushed him back down to a lying position.
“You mustn’t get up until the doctor says it’s okay,” she warned. He pulled her to him and held her tighter.
“Yes, but you killed him and then Ortiz shot you,” Lola explained trying to ease his confusion.
“How did you escape Ortiz?”
“Tony. He was in the room the second your body hit the ground.” Rob looked around the room for the brother who saved his life and the life of the woman who gave his back to him, but he was nowhere to be seen.
“Where is Tony?” Rob asked.
“He’s waiting in the waiting room. They won’t let anyone but family back until you’re awake.”
“Then how are you here?” he asked a smile playing on his lips. He knew she would have fabricated some story to stay by his side; he just knew it.
“I told them I was your fiancée,” she said hanging her head in shame.
He reached under her chin and brought her eyes up to meet his. “Well, I am glad you were the first thing I saw when I woke up,” he said placing a gentle kiss against her lips. “Can I have some water?”
“Of course.” She hurried to fill the plastic cup with some water and handed it to him. The cold liquid felt so good going over his dry mouth and down his parched throat.
“We have a lot to talk about, but I don’t want to rush you,” Lola announced to Rob.
“I know.” Rob had to tell her about his experience with Lizzie. He had to tell her he was officially all hers. But most importantly, after seeing her with a gun held to her head, he had to tell her he was in love with her. Life was too short to wait.
Just then, the doctor entered the room. “So, you’re awake.” The doctor smiled. Lola smiled back with great relief in her eyes.
“Lola, if you would excuse us? I need to examine him,” said the doctor.
“Sure, I will go tell the others you’re awake. I’ll be back as soon as they’ll let me.” She leaned in and kissed him hard, lingering at his lips. Thankful was not a strong enough word for the emotion she felt.
Chapter 29
Rob was released from the hospital two days later with a bandage around his head where the bullet had grazed. He was a damn lucky man. They made their way back to Blackrain’s office and headed upstairs to Tyrrell’s office for a debriefing. Each member of the team gave their report and answered an hour’s worth of questions. Tyrrell needed to justify the expenditures to Mr. Sardeson. He needed complete reports and guarantees that all parties who were a danger to Lola were now neutralized. Of course, Tyrrell knew this, he was there. But a full report was what he needed. When Rob was done with his portion, he walked into the hall.
Rob found Lola in the hallway leaning up against the wall. “Come on, I’ll show you where you will be staying while you’re here.” Rob extended his hand and Lola placed her delicate hand into Rob’s larger one. He intertwined their fingers and led her down the hallway to one of the bedrooms. Tyrell had rooms made into bedrooms because frequently teammates needed to stay overnight to ready for a mission. Rob picked the room at the far end of the hall and opened the door. The room had cream colored walls and a bed against the far wall. The bed was made with a maroon colored comforter. And to Lola’s surprise the curtains matched the bedspread. Someone had good taste.
“Sorry there is no dresser. You will have to live out of your suitcase for a while.”
“What about you?” Lola questioned as she looked at him with fear in her eyes. “We have so much to talk about.”
He leaned in and pressed his soft, pliable lips to hers. He kissed her with an appreciation he had never known. When he broke the kiss, the right side of his lips curled up until he was grinning.
“I’ll never grow tired of your kisses,” Rob assured her, his lips curling up at the corners into a grin.
“Rob, we have to talk,” Lola cajoled turning away from him. She needed to know where she stood so she could get her baby the care he or she needed.
“I know Lizzie will always hold a place in your heart, and I don’t want to take that away from her or you. But, you have to let her go if you want to move on with me.” She turned back around to face him. To her surprise, he stood there smiling a goofy grin. “What could you possibly be smiling about? I know how you feel about her,” Lola debated.
“I wanted to talk to you about Lizzie and what happened between us.”
“I don’t understand. What do you mean? What happened?”
“Let me explain. Here sit down,” he said extending his arm to her back and leading her to the bed. She sat down and looked up at him with wide-eyes.
“Something happened while I was unconscious, and you are going to think I am crazy, but I swear to you, it really happened.”
“Okay, what,” she drawled out.
“I saw Lizzie in a place she called the in between. She gave me a choice. I could go with her, or I could come back to you.”
Tears instantly formed in Lola’s eyes. She saw the peace in Rob’s eyes when he spoke of his encounter with Lizzie.
“There’s more.”
“Go on,” she said wiping the tears from her face with the back of her hand.
“I kissed her…goodbye.”
“Does that mean you’re all mine?” Lola asked a smile threatening her lips.
“I will make you a deal. I will be all yours, if you are all mine,” he said playing with her.
“Before I can answer that, we have to talk about something pretty important to me,” Lola responded. Rob looked at her with both eyes. She was serious. He had never seen her so serious before. Whatever it was, was greatly important to her. He would do his best to reassure her. He couldn’t lose her now that he had finally found the woman he could love for all eternity.
What was it about Rob that possessed her soul so completely? He was domineering and she didn’t want to live under anyone’s thumb. Sure, he was incredibly gorgeous. He was tall, muscular, had the perfect specimen of a body. He had an eight-pack of rock hard abs. She took care of herself physically, so she wanted someone who cared about his body in the same way.
But it was more than his looks. It was the way he cared for her. She always wanted a man to take care of her emotionally. She knew Rob was not a weak man and yet he had shown his vulnerability to her. Was it how he placed her above all else? Wasn’t that what love was? Did he love her? He wanted her to say she was his. He was finally over Lizzie, one hurdle down, two more to go. She definitely wanted a future with him, or she would have never of given herself to him. Was Rob her forever? She thought about it as she stared down at her feet as she chose her words.
She gathered her strength and courage for the conversation to come because she knew he could squash all of her hopes and dreams of a future with him, if he couldn’t get his caveman tendencies under control when it came to her.
She lifted her eyes to his and stared for a moment amassing her scattering courage. She didn’t want to lose him. Ever. She patted the spot beside her on the bed. “Here, sit down with me.” He sat down beside her. She tucked her legs under her body and sat so she was facing him. He mimicked her pose.
“What is it, Love? You’re scaring me,” Rob confessed.
“I need to talk to you about what you said about wanting to ‘own’ me. I thought that was pillow talk, but you said it again.”
Rob stood up and began pacing. He knew this was too good to be true. He ran his hand roughly over his face and
through his hair. Then he stopped short in front of her and got on his knees. He took her hands in both of his and looked up at her through his dark, thick lashes with both eyes.
“Please don’t say it. I know I got carried away. It was just seeing you there, in front of me, it brought feelings I didn’t know I was feeling to the surface. I am so sorry if I scared you. I just need you to know I would die for you. Shit, I have killed to protect you, and I would do it again, in a heartbeat. I would never do anything to hurt you.”
“God. No. Rob, it isn’t about that. I know you would never hurt me. But it is about what you mean when you asked me to be yours. I’m just going to say it. I’m going to lay my cards on the table and let the pieces fall where they may.”
Rob bowed his head.
“Look at me, Rob.” She broke free from his hands and took his face in her hands. She tilted his face up until their eyes met. “You’ve got me. I’m not going anywhere.”
Rob’s shoulders slumped and he exhaled. He had been holding his breath so afraid she was going to end it. “So what is it? What do you want to ask me?” Rob questioned much calmer than he was a few minutes ago.
“What will it mean to be yours? Because I won’t live under anyone’s thumb ever again. You don’t get to control what I do or who my friends are. You don’t get to tell me where I’m allowed to go and when I’m allowed to go out. Those are my choices and if being yours involves any of that, then I can’t do it. I am so sorry, because I want to do it, but I can’t. Not after everything I have been through with Daddy.”
Stronger (The Unit Book 2) Page 16