by Linnea Hall
Collin took two long quick strides toward her, catching her under the arms as she fell. When he caught her, she looked up into his eyes. “Collin?” Her gaze made his hands tremble. The fact that she recognized him made his stomach turn in knots. Was she happy to see him?
Like a bolt of lightning, realization struck. He should not be standing here. He should be in a hospital bed for, how long? He didn’t even know. And after that, how many months of physical therapy to return him to the condition he was in now? Was it fear he saw in her eyes? He glanced over to the woman that had walked in with Jewell. The look on her face was one of both fear and relief. A smile tugged at the corner of her lips as she started inching towards the entrance to the building. It was at that moment that he realized his being here was a good thing. He was what Jewell needed.
“Collin,” she whispered. He picked her up so her feet were no longer touching the ground and held her in his strong arms. “Honeysuckle” he whispered as he held her close and buried his face in her hair. Her body quivered, as she felt the heat of him melting into her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held tight, luxuriating in the feel of his warm body.
Something about him, the way he smelled, made her feel comfortable, safe. She inhaled deeply, trying to identify the smell. Suddenly, she had a flash of memory. He smelled like her grandma’s house. Like cedar and rain and laurel in the spring. She buried her face in his neck, breathing in his scent. Too soon, he let go and set her back on her feet.
Softly, she heard Ashley whisper “I’ll see you later Jewell.” Jewell had forgotten that Ashley was standing there. Jewell didn’t respond. She didn’t look towards her friend as she walked away. All she could do was to stare into Collin’s eyes, memorizing their color, the same color as the clouds darkening today’s sky, his full ruby lips, his strong jaw. She drank in his every feature.
“Collin…how? What are you doing here? How are you here? Where have you been?” The words tumbled out in an excited flood.
He responded, the deep symphony of his voice sending ripples of fire through her. “In order, how – I drove, what – I came to see you, where - well, that’s a long story.”
Jewell was too light headed to think. She started to feel dizzy and lose her balance when she felt Collin pull her into his arms again. She wished that she could stay like that with him, forever. She shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. She tried to remember the days since he had first arrived at the hospital. How many days had it been? About two weeks, maybe a little more? It was impossible. There was no way that he could be healed enough to be standing here in front of her, supporting her, holding her.
She slowly pushed herself away from him. She looked again, up into his storm gray eyes. He was taller than she had thought he would be. Of course, she had only seen him lying down. His sandy blonde hair was cut short, slightly shorter than a crew cut. It was probably cut that way because of the injury on the top of his head. This was certainly better than a reverse Mohawk.
Jewell tried to think of all the injuries he had when he arrived in the emergency room, surveying each as she moved down his body. The cut on his head, she couldn’t see that without asking him to bend down. His right cheekbone had been crushed, his eye swollen completely shut. She carefully reached up to touch his face, trailing her fingers lightly along the bone. She saw his eyes close at her touch. She moved her fingers to his nose, straight and beautiful. Her hands trailed across his lips which were slightly parted. A small moan escaped his lips as she touched them. Her inspection continued, down to his collarbones, across his ribs. She moved her hands to his arms, gliding them down to his hands. She entwined her fingers in his, lifting his arms carefully, turning them over. Then she slowly, reluctantly dropped his hands so that she could step back and gaze down at his legs; neither had a cast nor a brace.
Collin watched her as she began surveying each of his injuries one at a time. The touch of her fingers sent fire shooting through his body. Where her fingers touched him, it left a trail of heat and pleasure. He closed his eyes, feeling the light touch of her hands as they moved across his face, touching his lips, and moving down to his chest and along his arms. His fingers wrapped around hers as she entwined them in his. For a moment, he wondered if she was going to bend down and run her hands down his legs as well. When she released his hands and he felt the warmth from her body move away, he opened his eyes. He saw her, staring at his legs, her mouth hanging partway open. He waited silently for the questions he knew were about to come; the questions for which he had no answers.
“Collin, this is…it’s impossible. Your injuries; there’s no way that you can be standing here. It’s medically impossible.” As Jewell said the words, she almost expected this apparition standing in front of her to fade, to leave her once again, standing alone and despondent.
“I’ve always been a quick healer.” Collin said lightly, knowing that this answer would not be enough.
“But…how?”
“Honestly Jewell, I don’t know. I don’t know why I’m able to stand here, to hold you in my arms. A part of me wants to believe that it’s because I couldn’t stand to be away from you, and this was the only way I would be able to see you again before I died of loneliness.”
“I thought you were gone. I thought…”
Collin laid a finger on her lips to silence her thought. “I will never leave you Jewell. It is physically impossible for me to be away from you. This last week, you’re all I’ve thought about, every moment I was awake, every moment I was asleep. I would wake with your name on my lips thinking, hoping, believing that you would be there. The emptiness I felt when I realized I was only dreaming made me feel like I was a ghost, like I no longer existed, like I had no substance without you.”
“Collin, I’ve missed you so much. I don’t ever want to be away from you again.” She stepped toward him, wanting him to fold her in his arms, wishing that they could melt together into one person.
Collin held her, breathing in her honeysuckle scent, memorizing how she felt in his arms. “I have to go,” he laid his hand on her lips as she began to protest. “You need to work, and I need to get back home before my uncle comes looking for me. I’ll be back in the morning waiting for you, right here, at six-thirty.” He gently lifted her chin and lowered his face to hers. She felt his lips brush against hers, not a kiss, but a promise. His breath tasted of honey and almonds. His lips trailed along the line of her jaw and up to her ear. The warm breath of his whisper sent fire through her body “I will be back for you, always.”
He let her go, and walked swiftly away. Before Jewell could react, he had disappeared once again into the shadows
When Jewell walked into the locker room, she walked right into Ashley who was waiting for her by the door. Jewell yelped in surprise. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be upstairs working or something?” Jewell pushed her way past into the locker room so she could get changed glancing at her watch and realizing that she only had five minutes to get ready.
“Duh! What happened out there? Did you think I didn’t notice? Wasn’t that Collin?” She said his name with a teasing tone in her voice.
“Ash, I’ve got to get to work. I don’t know about your supervisor, but Nurse Yohanan will be heated if I haven’t checked in on time.” Jewell pulled her scrub shirt over her head, grabbed her shoes and slammed her locker shut. She started walking briskly toward the locker room door, carrying her shoes.
Ashley followed behind her, obviously waiting for any crumb that Jewell might accidentally drop. Just outside the door, Jewell threw her shoes to the floor and shoved her feet in as she ran towards the ER.
Ashley stood at the locker room door, completely dumbfounded. She couldn’t believe that her best friend would dis her on such an important matter. Couldn’t she at least share the tiniest bit of information? Was it good? Were they going to see each other again? She turned to walk toward the elevators. It wasn’t until she was standing in the elevator, rising t
oward her job in obstetrics that it occurred to her that Collin shouldn’t have been able to stand there and talk to Jewell. He shouldn’t even be able to stand. Ashley pulled her phone out and hit the message key. U O me the 411! TTYL or LS! She hit the send key on her phone and tucked it back in her pocket.
Feeling her phone vibrate, Jewell knew it was Ashley asking for information. She knew it wouldn’t be Collin, he didn’t have her number. She would have to remedy that the next time she saw him; if there was a next time. She felt giddy, anxious, worried, and excited all at the same time. She knew her face was flushed. She walked towards the file room with a pile of folders that Nurse Yohanan had given her to put away. Usually the nurses didn’t do the filing, there was a high school girl who did the filing during the day but she had been sick for the past week and Nurse Yohanan hated disorganization.
When Jewell reached the file room, out of Nurse Yohanan’s sight, she pulled out her cell phone and replied to Ashley…k. She figured she would have to tell her everything. What was everything? What would she tell Ashley? She put the last file on the shelf and walked back out to the nurses’ station. Things were crazy. Apparently, while she was brooding over her situation, there was an accident where six people were injured. None of the wounds were life threatening, but there was plenty to do. Whatever she thought about Collin would have to wait.
Things finally slowed down just after midnight. Jewell ducked into a treatment room to send a quick text to Ashley. Can u eat? She didn’t even have time to put her phone back into her pocket when Ashley replied: mEt me inda cafe 10 mins.
It was almost twenty minutes before Jewell made her way down to the cafeteria. Ashley was waiting, leaning against a wall, tapping her foot impatiently. When she saw Jewell walking down the hallway, she stood up and strode to meet her. “It’s about time! This has been absolutely killing me! So what did he say?”
Jewell looked around at the other people in line. “Let’s get our food and sit down first.”
“OMG! I swear you are doing this just to irritate the heck out of me.”
Ashley didn’t even look at what she was taking, but filled her tray quickly and moved to the register. Jewell chose a little more carefully, choosing a Cobb salad, even though she wasn’t even sure that she could keep that down, the way her stomach was knotted like a fist.
After they paid, Ashley made a bee line to the first available table she saw. Jewell walked past her and found a table that was a little more private. The cafeteria was busy, but not so much so that they couldn’t put a few tables between them and the other diners.
Ashley set her tray on the table and sat. She put her elbows on the table resting her chin in her hands, staring intently at Jewell, obviously waiting. Jewell took her time, wickedly enjoying her friend’s impatience and frustration. She carefully removed the plastic cover from her salad, and placed it next to herself like a bowl. Next, she opened her packet of dressing and squeezed it into the upturned salad lid, making sure that she had squeezed out every last drop. Next, she picked up her napkin, unfolded it, and flipped it out to lay it gently in her lap.
“For the love of all that’s holy! Get on with it!” Ashley practically exploded with pent up frustration.
“Fine.” Jewell finally conceded. “As you probably guessed, that was Collin. What did you think?”
“Hot. Very, very hot. What else?”
“Well…he said he missed me.” Jewell grinned, a little embarrassed. “And…I said I missed him. And then he said he would meet me after work.”
“That’s it?” Ashley flung her hands out indicating that she had expected more, and much juicier details. “Did he kiss you? Did you kiss him? What was it like when he was holding you after you nearly passed out? Details, girl, I need details!”
“There aren’t really any details. I don’t know. I felt so safe in his arms, it felt right. It felt like our bodies and souls were two pieces of a puzzle that fit together perfectly. He smelled good. He felt, oh man, he felt…so good; his muscles, his arms squeezing me, holding me like he didn’t want to let me go.” Jewell stopped for a moment, taking a bite of her Cobb salad, trying to think of what else her friend might like to hear, trying to catch her breath after replaying the episode with Collin in her head.
“He didn’t kiss me. I mean, he did, but not really. It was like, his lips just brushed against mine and they were so soft, and his breath was so warm. And then he whispered to me that he would see me after my shift.”
“Wow. That is so cool! So, you think he’ll really be there, waiting for you?” Ashley hesitated then answered her own questions “Yeah! Duh! You should have seen the way he looked at you!”
“Really? Like how?”
“I don’t know. It was like Romeo looking at Juliet.”
Jewell blushed and stared down at her salad, pushing it around idly.
Ashley watched her for a minute. “There is one thing though…” She let the thought trail off.
“What?”
“Jewell, you know as well as I do that he should still be in a hospital somewhere. Don’t you think that’s a little…I don’t know, weird? Does it bother you?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it yet. I guess it does, sort of. I asked him about it, he says he doesn’t understand either.”
“Well, I guess we’ll find out sooner or later. Maybe he’s with a travelling circus or something. Come see the amazing healing man. Break his arm and watch it mend before your eyes!”
“Yeah maybe.”
*
The time between “lunch” and quitting time seemed to drag on forever. Though the ER had been busy, Jewell’s thoughts were elsewhere. She thought, not only of the perfect line of his jaw, his beautiful, hypnotic eyes, his chiseled muscles beneath his tight black t-shirt, but she also contemplated his curious recovery.
She was definitely in love with him. She knew that without a doubt. It was exactly what her father had described he felt when he found his wife, her mother; the perfect fit of two souls, two hearts, merging into one; two halves of a puzzle, the picture unclear and incomplete without the other half. She knew it when she was with him, but more unmistakably, she knew it when she was without him.
But there was a part of her that was scared. Frightened of what this meant, how this would change her life. But even more so, she was terrified of the implications of his incredible propensity to heal. Medically, what she had seen was unnatural; inhuman. What was he? He looked human. He most definitely felt human, but he was something more. What that was is what troubled her. When she found out, would she be able to make the right choice? Would she be able to run if that was what she needed to do? What if running was the only answer, but she couldn’t? What if her feelings for him kept her from thinking clearly?
These thoughts floated through her mind amidst the broken bones, the crying children, the soaring fevers. The question ultimately came down to, “could she pull the plug?” How many times had she seen families agonizing over that decision? Was the decision selfish if they decided to pull the plug, or selfish if they didn’t? And after it was done, it could not be undone; there was no turning back. Perhaps in this case, it would be best if she let go, if she just…pulled the plug.
Finally, she saw the day shift milling around the nurses’ station. It was a relief to know that she would soon see Collin again, but she agonized over what she would do when she confronted him. Would she follow her heart, or follow her head?
As Jewell finished changing, Ashley shoved everything into her bag, shoved Jewell’s clothes into her tote, grabbed both bags and pulled Jewell toward the door. Jewell allowed herself to be pulled along behind Ashley until they reached the doors to exit the hospital. Jewell jerked her arm out of Ashley’s hand and did her best to glare at her.
“Excuse me, but this would be my date…if he’s even here.” She felt a knot develop in the pit of her stomach at the thought of Collin not showing up as he had promised.
“He’ll be
here, and fine; just hurry up!” Jewell was a bit overwhelmed by Ashley’s excitement, and it was beginning to make her nauseous. Jewell paused and put her head down between her knees, taking several long slow breaths. When she felt composed enough to face Collin, she steadfastly walked out the door, Ashley following.
He wasn’t waiting next to the door as he had been when they came in. Jewell’s heart skipped a beat as she quickly scanned the parking lot. When her eyes found him, leaning casually against one of the pillars to the parking garage, her heart leapt into her throat. She gasped, and grabbed on to Ashley for support.
Ashley put her arm around Jewell’s waist as she started to lead Jewell in Collin’s direction. Collin didn’t move, but his eyes followed her, capturing every nuance of her movements, memorizing her walk, her face, her hair.
“Hey,” was all he said. That one single word was enough to make Jewell’s knees weak.
“Hey. I didn’t know if you would be here.”
“I promised I will always come for you.”
“You did.”
“So what now?” Ashley’s voice cut into their conversation like a knife. They both turned to look at Ashley. Ashley shrugged.
“Well,” Collin said, “Are you working tonight?”
“Yes,” Jewell replied forlornly.
“Maybe we could spend a few hours together? I promise I’ll get you home before lunch. Will that give you enough sleep before work?”
Ashley answered. “Of course it will!”
Jewell and Collin both glared at her. Ashley crossed her arms defiantly.
“Actually, Ashley and I rode together…” Jewell shrugged.
Collin turned to Ashley, “Would it be okay if I brought her home? I promise to take good care of her.” Collin winked at Jewell.