by Tracy Brogan
I liked kids, mostly. I liked my sister’s kids a lot, but this was the kind of overwhelming sensation an allergic person must feel when surrounded by angry bees. All the buzz, buzz, buzz and the shriek, shriek, shriek. Even if I could find Drew, how the hell was he going to hear my explanation over this pandemonium? I guess I’d have to cross that bridge when I came to it. The first order of business was to find him.
I turned left and right, then around in a helpless circle. Back behind me was an elevated stage where Old Junior Hampton was once again sitting in his green velvet chair and welcoming eager kids onto his lap. That guy was eighty if he was a day, not that you could tell with the fake beard and fuzzy red suit, and if the line hadn’t been twenty deep in little kids, I might have gone up to ask him if he knew where his grandson was. I’d never get past the elves, though. One of them was Trina Bartholomew.
“There you are!” Erin said, navigating her youngest by the head over to where I was standing. Anna smiled up at me, her lips and teeth an inhuman shade of royal blue.
“Aunt Kelsey, I had cotton candy two times!” she yelled and held up stained fingers.
“Yes, you did,” Erin said. “Because you tricked me and Daddy, didn’t you? That’s why you can’t get your face painted with your sisters. And it’s why you’re going to have a tummy ache tonight.”
Anna’s smile didn’t fade. “Two times!” she shouted.
Erin shook her head and looked back at me with a Well, it’s Christmas. What are ya gonna do? expression. “I just hope she doesn’t throw up. My kids always throw up.”
I looked down at my niece. She had some crazy eyes going on. Very disturbing. “Two times, huh? Maybe that wasn’t the best choice? Your lips are blue. You look like a Smurf.”
“What’s a Smurf?” she yelled with far more vigor than necessary and then spun in a circle.
“Never mind.” I looked back at my sister. “So, you saw Drew here?”
“I saw him a while ago, right when the carnival first started. I thought you were coming with him. What happened?”
“I’m pretty sure that when he came to pick me up he saw Blake through the window and misunderstood what he saw. He left me a tree, though, Erin. It’s all decorated with petri dishes and tweezers. It’s so adorable.” My eyes welled up stupidly.
“Blake left you a tree?”
I flicked away my sentimental tear. “No, Drew left the tree. I think he saw Blake down on one knee in front of me and so he left.”
“Down on one knee? Did he propose to you, that jackass?” She slapped a hand over her mouth and looked around to see if anyone had heard her swear. As if anyone could.
I crossed my arms and tapped my foot. “No, the jack-you-know-what wants me to be his secretary. I told him no thanks and that I quit.”
Erin’s face went from worry to elation. “You did?”
“Yes, and I broke up with him, too, obviously, but I don’t think he cared that much.” It should hurt more to say that, but it didn’t because I had Drew to cushion the blow. If only I knew where the hell he was. And if only he didn’t think I was engaged.
“I need to find Drew and tell him that what he saw isn’t what he saw.” I felt more frantic about this than I should. I mean, it wasn’t as if I thought he’d go jump off a bridge with a broken heart or run off and marry the lunch lady before I found him. It was just that I was finally starting to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life—so I wanted the rest of my life to start right now.
“He’s got to be here somewhere,” Erin said. We both looked around. No sign of him. I saw my grandma and Dody, in the disco ball sweater, talking to an attractive couple with twin toddlers. And there was Tyler Connelly and what must be his wife and family. He looked good. He always had, but now he looked like a dad. A sexy, happy dad as he lifted a little girl up and onto his shoulders. She giggled and thwacked him in the collarbones with her heels. He didn’t even flinch. I saw Gabby Linton from high school, and her sister, Hillary, and a handful of other familiar Bell Harbor faces, along with lots and lots of kids. This was one fertile town. I’d do well to remember that.
I looked in the other direction and spotted Drew’s father, Big Junior Hampton, sitting on a bench and talking to the elderly man next to him. Then I saw . . . wait. My eyes flew back to the two men. That wasn’t just any old man. That was Drew’s grandfather, Old Junior Hampton. But if Old Junior Hampton was sitting next to Big Junior Hampton, then who the hell was dressed as Santa?
I spun around so fast my ears nearly came off, and I stared at Father Christmas sitting on the green velvet chair with a kid on his leg. His very long leg. Oh, holy night! Old St. Nick had never been quite so tall before.
“Santa?” I squeaked out, gripping Erin by the arm.
She followed my gaze, and her brows furrowed. “Um, yes, Kelsey. There’s Santa. He comes every year.” She glanced down at Anna, who was now hopping on one foot and ignoring us.
I leaned closer to my sister. “I think that’s Drew!”
She stared now, eyes widening. “You think? Why do you think that?”
“Because Old Junior Hampton is sitting over there with Big Junior Hampton, and that only leaves Little Junior Hampton unaccounted for. And I don’t see him anywhere else, do you?”
Erin stared up at the stage for another minute, pressing her lips together tightly, then she burst out laughing. “That’s hilarious. You’re dating Santa. Say, Kels, that new boyfriend of yours sure is jolly. I see some very interesting role-playing in your future. Maybe he’ll show you his North Pole.”
She doubled over with humor and clutched my wrist while I just stood there wondering what to do now. “How am I supposed to talk to him if he’s up there?”
My sister straightened up again and tried to tamp down her laughter. “I guess if you want to talk to Santa, you’ll have to get to him the same way everyone else does. Go stand in line.”
“Seriously?”
“Or you wait until he’s finished.” She glanced at her watch. “Just remember, his grandfather always made sure every single kid who wanted one had a turn. He should be finished up there in about three hours.”
Three hours? I could not deal with this kind of holiday crazy for three hours. That was forever. But I couldn’t just leave knowing that he thought I was engaged to Blake, either. I had to talk to him now. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
“Anna, have you seen Santa yet and told him what you want for Christmas?” I asked, looking down at my wild-eyed, blue-tinted niece.
She shook her head. “That’s not the real Santa. That’s just a helper.”
“What makes you think that?”
“He’s wearing shoes. Everybody knows that the real Santa wears boots.” Her disdain was evident, as if this imposter was so far beneath her notice as to not warrant mentioning.
“Okay, he’s Santa’s helper, but you still should tell him what you want. I’ll stand in line with you.” I probably should have asked my sister’s permission before claiming her child for my own purposes, but Erin just smiled.
“No, I don’t want to talk to him.” Anna crossed her arms. “I only talk to the real Santa.”
“Please? I’m sure he’ll pass your list up the chain of command. This might be the closest you’re going to get to Santa or his helpers. You don’t want to miss that chance, do you?” This is what I was reduced to. Pleading with and lying to my four-year-old niece. The things we do for love. Or at least extreme affection.
“Oh, fine.” She harrumphed. “I can’t get my face painted anyway.” And she stomped off toward the line. I followed obediently.
“Good luck,” Erin called after me. “I’ll be in the parents’ beer tent when you’re finished.”
I scooped up Anna’s hand into mine. “Thanks, kid. I owe you one.”
“Will you get me more cotton candy?”
“Yes.” Probably a bad call, but I’d promise anything to get her cooperation. If she threw up in my broth
er-in-law’s car, so be it.
“Okay.” She swung our hands and we got in line.
If Drew noticed me, he certainly didn’t give any indication of it. Although I’m not sure what I expected him to do. He was Kris Kringle Undercover at the moment. And so I waited. Anna kept up a steady monologue of all the things she was noticing.
“The lights are pretty. I like the red ones. Did you see the tree decorated with the mittens for the poor people? Some people don’t have any mittens so we put them on the tree and then somebody gives them to the poor people. Do you like eggnog? I like eggnog. I wonder how many presents Santa will give me. I’ve been mostly nice and only a little bit naughty. But Mommy got mad when I played with her holy people.”
“Her holy people?”
“Yes, you know. The ones on the table by our front door. Mother Mary and the baby Jesus and the three smart guys.”
“You mean the wise men?”
“Yes, them. I had them dancing with my Barbies and she didn’t like that. She said they were just for looking at. Not dancing.”
“Ah,” I said, shuffling my feet forward in the slowest line ever.
“Are you going to ask Santa for anything this year?” Anna asked.
I was going to. Yes, indeed, I was. Not something I could share with her four-year-old ears, though, so I just nodded. “I might.”
Another ten minutes passed as the line inched ahead. Anna continued her chattering, and I started noticing all the things she was pointing out. The pretty lights and fancy garlands, the holiday music and the way everyone seemed to be smiling and laughing. I’d been up to my earlobes in Christmas for the last ten years. I’d been smothered by it, drenched in it, suffocated until I couldn’t stand to look at it anymore. I’d been overwhelmed when I first arrived at this carnival, too. All the noise and the chaos. But as I looked around, I suddenly realized it wasn’t so much chaos as it was just an overabundance of joyfulness. Uncontained, unruly, unabashedly unapologetic joyfulness.
Life should be like that sometimes. Fun and loud. Exuberant and happy. These decorations had transformed a lowly old gymnasium into something special. Maybe Christmas wasn’t so bad after all. Maybe these people here realized that the spirit of Christmas was really about these people here, the loved ones they were surrounded by. Somewhere along the line, I’d forgotten that, but now I was remembering. What a lovely realization!
My heart may have grown three sizes just then, but we reached the front of the line and Trina Bartholomew blocked my path like a cold north wind.
“You can wait here,” she said to me as Anna scampered around her and up the steps.
My newfound Christmas spirit nearly took a nosedive, but I rallied. “Thank you, Trina. You look really cute in that elf outfit.”
“What elf outfit?”
Dasher, Dancer, and Blitzen! Those were her actual clothes. Whoopsie. In my defense, she was wearing a red-and-green-striped stocking cap and that looked pretty damn elfy to me. “Um, I mean, I like your hat.”
Her eyes narrowed with her usual squint, and she may have grunted something like “Thanks,” but I couldn’t be sure.
In the meantime, my niece had flung herself into Drew’s lap. Apparently even if she had pegged him as a lowly Santa’s helper, she was still going to give it her all. I leaned around the barricade that was Trina, and Drew’s eyes met mine over Anna’s head. He held my gaze, but I couldn’t interpret his reaction because of his big, fake beard. And the tiny, round glasses. And the fur-trimmed hat. And the big, round belly. Geez, that was a lot of disguise going on. I sure hoped that was really him, because if it wasn’t, I was about to make quite a fool of myself!
My heart thumped erratically as Anna finished her list and hopped off Drew’s lap. I looked over to the exit side of the stage and saw Erin waiting for her, beer in hand. My sister waved at me with the other hand as Anna scampered over to her. My niece was no longer under my command.
So it was now or never. Trina Bartholomew might try to tackle me to the ground, but I’d waited in this darn line for twenty minutes just to tell Drew I wasn’t engaged. I was not about to let a little thing like her—well, make that a big thing like her—stop me. I wasn’t going to be dissuaded by the size of the crowd, either. Sure, the gym was full of people I knew, people I had grown up with, moms and dads with their kids, but Bell Harbor loved a good scandal. Me sauntering up on stage and making a pass at Santa would certainly be more fun to talk about than the donkey manure debacle.
I ducked around Trina and came up on the stage.
“Hey!” I heard her say, but I was too fast and wily for her.
Santa-Drew sat up a little straighter in the chair. Even up close, all I could see were his hazel eyes, but I knew his build. I’d seen all of that body and I knew it was him. No doubt about it, but now that I was here, I felt a little stupid. Eager and anxious and hopeful and stupid.
“Hey, Santa.” I smiled sheepishly. “Got a minute?”
Drew
What the hell was she doing here?
I’d seen her come in. I’d seen her talking to her sister. I’d even seen her standing in line in her sexy red sweater, but I sure as hell didn’t think she’d come up on the stage. But there she was, standing right in front of me, and here I was wearing this hot, scratchy Santa suit. Not my best look. But my grandfather had gotten lightheaded, and since my dad was keeping an eye on him, I had to man up and don the suit. No way could I let the entire population of Bell Harbor’s kids be disappointed because Santa was a no-show.
I suppose it was an honor to fill in for my much-revered grandpa, but in truth, I was grumpy as hell. I was Bad Santa. Because Kelsey Parker was engaged.
So what the hell was she doing here? Seriously. What the hell?
“Um, I’m a little busy,” I said, gesturing to the line.
“Kids are waiting.” Trina glowered at her.
Kelsey looked back over the crowded gym. People were starting to take notice of her on the stage, and that just made my hot, scratchy suit hotter and scratchier. But she gave a little shrug and walked on over to plop herself right down on my lap. That was a problem. Her rump? My junk? In front of all these kids? Have yourself a twerky little Christmas.
I cleared my throat. “This is really not a good time.”
Her smile was a sweet, sexy mixture that reminded me of what those lips felt like to kiss. Not a good time for me to be remembering that, either.
She leaned in. “Sorry. I know you’re busy granting wishes to all the little children, but I wanted to thank you for my Christmas tree, and since you totally stood me up, I had to come here instead.”
“This is a family affair, Parker,” called Trina. “Not a singles bar.”
Trina was right, of course. I should tell Kelsey to be on her way. I could talk to her later. But the Bad Santa in me was pretty damn interested in what she had to say. “Well, you looked a little busy at your grandma’s house,” I said.
She nodded. “I was busy. Busy breaking up with Blake.”
Whaaaat? The guy was down on one knee and she was nodding and smiling. I might be a grown man wearing furry red pants, but I wasn’t so dumb that I didn’t recognize a proposal when I saw one. “You broke up with Blake? It didn’t look like you were breaking up.”
Her laugh was soft. “Well, as much as my ego might like to say he asked me to marry him, he was actually offering me a job. A job that I turned down. And then I quit.”
“You quit your job?” My brain tried to reorganize all my thoughts from the past couple of hours. Not easy to do with her ass pressed against me.
“Yes, I quit my job,” she said. “And I’m thinking about opening my own shop here in Bell Harbor. What do you think of that? Maybe I’ll sell Christmas ornaments made out of petri dishes.”
This was definitely better news than I had hoped for. In fact, it was starting to appear that I’d gotten worked up over a big pile of nothing.
“You liked the petri dishes, huh?”
&n
bsp; “Yes, I liked the petri dishes very much. I like you quite a bit, too.”
My mood suddenly shifted from “Blue Christmas” to “Joy to the World” because apparently I hadn’t lost the girl after all. Maybe my stupid tree idea wasn’t so stupid. Maybe, just maybe, Kelsey Parker realized I could offer her things that Blake and the Haskell family could not. At the very least, I was going to get my chance. And I wasn’t going to waste it.
“Thanks,” I said. “Word around town is that I’m quite a catch.”
Her smile grew, and so did my optimism. Among other things. I was definitely going to need a break before the next kid sat on my lap. Either that or get arrested.
“I agree. You’re quite a catch,” she said. “Is it going to cost me another two hundred dollars to prove it?”
The clamor in the gym swelled as more people took notice of us. There was laughter and pointing. I could practically hear the rumors circulating already. But I didn’t care. All I cared about was spending another night with Kelsey. And then another night, and another night. And a few more after that.
I would have kissed her right there, except I was wearing a synthetic beard and must look ridiculous. Not to mention the level of emotional scarring it would cause the children of Bell Harbor. Kisses were going to have to wait.
“Keep your money, honey,” I said, bouncing my knee a little. “Santa is all about giving. So how about you tell me what you’d like for Christmas?”
Her cheeks flushed a girlish pink, but her expression was pure vixen. “Well, I’m too old for Polly Pockets or Beanie Babies, and I don’t need a pony. So I guess the only thing I want for Christmas . . . is you.”
Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas. I cleared my throat. “Done. Milk and cookies at my house later?”