by T. G. Ayer
Which was exactly the way I felt.
Chapter 31
During the meeting with the rebel leaders, I wasn’t sure exactly what to do with the thoughts whirling in my head. The queen had kept crucial information from us. The queen had remained in captivity of her own free will.
The queen had been subjected to a full medical examination by Sentinel. All those red flags? I wasn’t sure what to do with them.
Back in our allocated room, we found Aisha nowhere to be seen, and I decided to take advantage of her absence and confer with the team. Darcy would have to be included in the inner circle of this confession but I figured she’d likely be helpful anyway.
They turned to me as one as though they could sense I was bursting to get something off my chest. And I took a breath and shook my head. “That was a serious info download.”
Kai’s one eyebrow lifted. “But that’s not what’s bothering you?
“Not really. It’s something of a majestic problem.”
Darcy snorted. “Don’t you have a way with words.”
I sighed and sank onto a lumpy sofa beside the door. The room contained little in the way of decor: a narrow trestle table surrounded by six chairs, two sofas pushed against the walls but still only three feet from the table. The other side of the room contained a row of cot beds also set against the far walls.
Rest, recon, prep all within the same room.
Kai sat beside me and as Darcy, Drake, and Logan each pulled up a chair, I said, “When Horner mentioned that Sentinel was under investigation. I asked about why they would require a medical examination of the queen. He had no idea although I was sure he was more than curious.”
Kai angled herself toward me. “And you have some reason why?”
“I think so, but man I feel bad even entertaining the possibility.”
Darcy waved a hand at the non-answer. “Ok, so out with it. And let us decide how bad it is.”
I crossed my fingers both physically and mentally in the hopes that voicing these concerns did not end up coming back to haunt me. “The thing is...I have to wonder if perhaps Sentinel was suspicious of whether Aisha was in captivity out of choice. The fact that she could have left at any point in time must have raised questions for them.”
“And for us too.” Logan rubbed his forehead, making me aware of the low throbbing inside my own skull.
“I guess it is. I had to question her actions in the beginning but then I put it aside accepting that she made those decisions because she was afraid.”
Kai nodded, tapping a finger on the leather of her pants. “Omega threatens the lives of her sons—’cause let’s not forget that Saleem was working for them and Rizwan was at their beck-and-call in Mithras.”
“But nothing she’s told us felt true for me,” I said softly, knowing even more than I could say. “She is holding back—remember the conversation with her military that we had seconds ago? What if Sentinel knew more than mere suspicions?”
Darcy blew out a breath, eyes now filled with concern. “I can’t blame you for being suspicious. But suppose it’s not a case of distrust really. I don’t think you should be feeling guilty.”
“Yeah,” said Logan. “It’s clear to everyone that she hasn’t been 100% open and truthful. So, you need to stop feeling guilty and analyze those thoughts. Let’s see if we can figure out the real reason, or maybe even try to understand her perspective.”
“Maybe I should have said something earlier.” I gritted my teeth, fingers curling into fists in my lap. “We were busy putting this entire team together and we knew everyone’s lives would be on the line. And all the while, one of the main people in the team was holding out on us.”
“How do we know that what she is holding back is even relevant to the mission?” offered Logan.
I could see that he was playing devil’s advocate—which was a good thing to consider another point of view, and with regard to Saleem’s powers and what Aisha had done to bind them, he was right.
Maybe I’d spent far too long focusing on how I felt about my suspicions rather than digging deeper into what they were.
“Okay, I see your point. But whatever it is, Sentinel suspects. If it’s related to the physical they put her through. And just for the record I’m not trying to say that she somehow conspired with Omega to give her realm away.”
My friends were nodding, eyes filled with understanding.
Darcy sighed and sat back. “She said she was afraid for her people and maybe it didn’t ring true at the time simply because it wasn’t the whole truth.”
“Yeah,” I muttered. “I have gotten to know her a little too well. And there was something in her eyes when she gave us her reasons. Something that made me wonder if she were hoping I wouldn’t read her thoughts...”
“So...why didn’t you?” asked Darcy, eyebrow curving.
“Pfft. The woman has been inside my mind from the start. She’d have caught me on the first try. I didn’t even know djinn could do that until I ran into Aisha’s mind.”
“Doesn’t bode well for you if Saleem can read your thoughts,” Kai said, her smirk showing she had zero sympathy for me.
I ignored her as I said, “Her husband was killed and then she was abducted by Omega and Division 7 because they had a hard-on for the djinn’s ability to create natural energy. Then, Saleem makes things worse by entering our world in search of his mother and ends up entangled in Omega’s web himself.”
“And little bro is left by himself, unable to defend against anyone determined to take over the realm.” Logan’s opinion of Rizwan was clear in his voice.
“And don’t forget you’re dealing with a very strong and very powerful woman,” Kai added. “Definitely more than your average badass bad. She could have flattened the entire estate and returned home to save her kingdom herself.”
“Don’t forget the wards. She was actively trying to help us get here. I have to admit that I am stumped.”
I nodded and then leaned closer to Kai. “Maybe it has something to do with her husband?”
“We already know Divison 7 killed the king,” Drake said, speaking for the first time, his expression inscrutable. “He certainly was devoted to his people. In which case, he could have put his family in danger.”
“It’s possible Division 7 is using his death as a trump card. “We killed your husband and we can do the same to your sons?” offered Logan.
Kai pursed her lips. “That may work if Rizwan is threatened. Not so sure about Saleem.”
“Well, she is still a mother. Omega could use her children to ensure she behaves herself,” Darcy said before sharing a sober, almost guilty glance with Logan.
“And don’t forget, she kinda likes Mel.” Kai smirked before saying, “And me. I’m almost positive she likes me too.”
“Hey, I’m pretty sure she has a soft spot for me as well,” Logan grumbled.
Chuckling, I smoothed the creases on my pants. “A few more things that she can be blackmailed with.”
Darcy sighed, “I suspect she’d do just as much to avoid getting any of us killed.”
I tilted my head from side to side, enjoying the stretch of my tense neck muscles. “This is giving me a headache. I feel like I’m going around and around in circles.” I had to admit that even now, discussing it with somebody else hadn’t alleviated any of my concerns.
Drake gave a low grunt before saying, “What I wouldn’t give to know what Sentinel knows. What is it that they are looking for that they’d find in her body?”
“So? What do we do now?” Kai said.
“Make our plans on our own, no sharing details with Sentinel or anyone else,” added Darcy.
“Keep our suspicions to ourselves,” Logan said softly, “And just hope to Hel that keeps us all safe.”
“And keep those same cards away from the djinn queen?” I said, guilt ripping me apart.
“Hey, you can’t feel bad. This is for her safety too, Mel,” Kai scolded. “We need to do everyt
hing we can to protect her even if it means keeping her in the dark.”
“Yeah.” I couldn’t deny the walker’s word. “She may be a danger to us too, so we need to be wary and careful, but none of this means we can’t trust her. I know that’s confusing…”
“Yeah. No. I mean, it’s not confusing,” Kai replied, rolling her eyes. “We can trust her but we can’t trust Omega.”
“And if they have something on her then we need to proceed with caution. For her sake as well as ours.” I nodded then gave Kai and the rest of the team a pointed look. “I think that’s about all we can rehash regarding my issue.”
Chapter 32
I studied Logan’s face, concerned about the look of worry in his eyes, the reasons for the furrows his frown seemed to have carved into his forehead. Was the weight of ruling a realm so heavy to bear?
I snickered silently at the question. Of course it’s heavy, I knew enough rulers to know such responsibility didn’t come easy, and when you did have it, keeping it tended to become the next hurdle to overcome.
“So? What’s bugging you? You look like you need to take a load off,” I said, jerking a chin at the sofa.
Logan smiled and sank onto the cushions behind him, then rested his head in hands propped on his knees. From between his splayed fingers came a deep sigh. “Sorry to have to throw this at you especially in the middle of this shit-show.”
“No better time, to be honest. May be good if you added a new flavor profile to this particular shit-show? This specific variety is getting a little boring.”
Logan chuckled then wiped his hands across his face, then ran his fingers through his hair. He’d cut the length a little, returning it to the just-touching-the-shoulder style that Saleem had been fond of. It made me smile to think that such a simple thing as an emulation of hairstyle choice between the two friends could warm a girl’s heart.
I must be getting soft.
I shook my head and then plopped onto the sofa opposite the king of the dragons. “So? What’s this thing you needed to ask me?” I asked, hoping it would be a good lead-in. Logan had requested the meeting but it appeared as though the telling of it was something he was struggling with.
I suppressed a sigh. From the looks of it this was going to be big. Not that big was unusual with the people around me. In fact, small would probably knock us clear onto our asses.
And small would definitely be a relief.
Logan sighed and pressed his temples, then straightened to meet my eyes. “So, there’s this little issue back home that I may need the team’s help with when we’re done with the djinn’s thing.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Firstly, little issue? I’m pretty sure from the look on your face that little has nothing to do with it. And secondly, the djinn’s thing? Boy, Logan, you’re going to have to have a much worse issue than that to define this mission as the djinn’s thing.”
Logan chuckled. “Taking my words a little personal, aren’t you?”
I narrowed my eyes. “I may or may not be serious.” I took a breath, aware that I did rant a little at Logan’s words. And maybe he was a little right too. Saleem’s situation was making me feel sensitive, even when his BFF was doing the commenting.
Now, Logan laughed and raised two fingers. “Okay, so there are two factions who are eyeing control of Drakys right now.”
I tilted my head, trying to hide my shock at his words. Still, so far, he’d only gotten maybe on an equal footing with the djinn issue. “A coup in the works?” I asked softly.
His nod was a jerky movement. “Yes. We’ve heard the rumors and then found out it’s true. Worst time to be away but Sienna is convinced that it will keep. She’s going to make up some excuse because she’s pretty certain these guys will want both of us present before they act.”
“Any particular reason they would want both of you there? Seems to me it would be easy enough to overthrow your rule while one of you is gone. Less push-back from one big powerful dragon than from two.”
Logan smiled. “That’s very true but they have a different reason for wanting us both there.”
“This doesn’t sound all that good.”
He sighed. “Word is they want the two of us together in order to break the power of the twin-dragon pair.”
“And there is actually a way to do that?”
He nodded his face now more dejected. “Yes. The power of the Egg is imbued into the fated sibling pair when they are initiated into rule. The egg is like a natural computer system that downloads all the info to the minds of the ruling siblings. Please don’t ask me how it works, to be honest it sounds quite hokey to me.”
“But you’ve been through the process right?”
“Yup.”
“And?”
“And it’s…intense.”
“Yeah, so I could do with an explanation that goes a little further than ‘intense,’” I said, smirking to take the edge of my words.
He did appear to be struggling with something regarding the situation which made me wonder how he really felt about taking over the role of co-ruler of the dragon-realm when all he’d believed himself to be was a simple human fire-mage.
Logan let out a soft sigh. “I guess if you guys are going to be part of my fight, then I owe it to you to be open about the reality of it.” He paused and nodded more to himself than to me. Then he shook his head, his gaze somewhere on the wall behind me. “It’s a strange land, really. Ancient rules and culture that go all the way back to the very first dragon’s rule. Our land was once home to a humanlike species and a fae-like one as well. The three peoples lived together in total harmony until power and greed began to drive the rule of the land. Magic played a great part though and eventually magic won out. And happily, magic also saved the realm. But might and strength won out easily and the dragons ruled for centuries. A Great War eventually took place that resulted in the saving of the realm from the nefarious rulers and which installed the sibling dragon rule, which has continued to this day.”
“So what happened to the human-like species? Were they wiped out in the wars? I mean I have never heard of humans in Drakys?”
“Not exactly. They were not wiped out. More like…assimilated.”
“Sorry, that’s still not doing much for me.”
Logan laughed. “Maybe assimilated isn’t the right word. How about intermarry-to-create-a-new-Drakys-people?”
“Ah, I very much prefer that.”
“Still, despite managing to achieve peace, Drakys had to then fight against the threat of invasion by a neighboring dragon realm.”
“Did you save yourselves?”
“We thought we had, but as with most rebels whose causes are not all that moral...”
“And these people and their way of thinking are responsible for the takeover threat?”
“For one of the threats. The other faction is demanding liberty and equality. They want to be citizens not subjects.”
“So your rulers have a history of subjugating the people?”
“Not that I know of. We just have a problem of matriarchal rule.”
I snickered. “Bet the old fuddy-duddy men don’t like that.”
“Yeah, them and their women either, if you can believe that. They are demanding the old ways back.”
“And those old ways are?”
“Women return to a subjugated life. No professional jobs, no right to own property or businesses, cannot be seen in public without the company of father or brother or husband.”
“Sounds archaic,” was all I could say.
“I agree. Sienna and I would rather the Equals be the ones to take over if it ever comes to that. The problem is that the information the egg provides is indispensable and it cannot be transferred in entirety to another person. You could likely verbally transfer much of the details but never everything. And that poses an integral danger to negotiate with these rebels. One group is a danger to the rights of women and the other is a danger to the access people will have to his
tory and to powerful knowledge.”
I let out a sigh and wrung my hands. “I see your dilemma. It’s worse than the rock and a hard place. I do not envy you, Logan—or Lyandr—or whoever you are.”
He grinned in reply. “So can I assume that you’re on board?”
“Of course, you can,” I replied with a sneaky grin. “And maybe you could help me out after?”
“That’s only fair. Do I want to know now?”
I shrugged. “It’s not realm-affecting. More family than anything.”
“Well, you have my word. And I can probably say that Sienna too will likely come along. She felt very bad that she wasn’t able to come with us to Mithras to help Saleem.”
“Always knew she had her heart in the right place,” I said with a smile.
And suddenly I felt relieved of a great weight. Without even realizing or understanding what I’d been trying to do, I’d slowly been gathering people to my own mission to help save Samuel and Ari.
Unless of course, Ari decided she’s better off not coming home.
Which was her prerogative. I had to keep reminding myself that Ari, though still a teenager, would be a girl who’d have gone through numerous horrors, the worst of it likely having been witness to her parents’ murders and then abducted from the safety of her home.
Experience changes a person’s psyche, their way of thinking and of seeing things. If Ari turned into an entirely different person to either of our parents, or even to me, I had no right to hold that against her.
And I couldn’t hold myself responsible either. If I could learn to handle those two aspects of the drama that was Ari and me, then I really believed we could get somewhere, at least to a point where we could get Samuel home and safe.
Then why was there a small part of me insisting that everything I’d told myself was a load of bullshit and that it was just me trying to make myself feel better about what could possibly turn out to be a bad ending.
But I wasn’t afraid of a bad ending. I was afraid of having no ending.