“Remember you are loved.
You are strong.
You are bear.
You are my daughter.
Find him.”
Tears fell into her stew. Kinley cried softly and clutched both note and necklace to her chest.
All those years ago, her mom knew Kinley would come to Newhalen and search for a missing boy. The whispers were often hard to interpret, but to leave this with Mara with the certainty it would end up in Kinley’s hands, it was amazing. It was as if her mom reached through the decades and gave Kinley a kiss.
“I’ll find him. Nothing will stop me.” Kinley whispered her promise and leaned into Mara’s embrace as the older woman came around to hug her.
Morning came swiftly. Ransom had slept hard through the night, but Kinley kept waking and wandered through the lodge. If someone saw her from outside, would they think her a ghost dressed in flannel pajama bottoms?
“I have a different strategy for today.” Kinley handed Ransom a mug of coffee. Steam swirled with a tantalizing scent that had her sipping her own much quicker than she should with something that hot. “We’re going to try to lure the lynx totem and Urayuli to us.”
Ransom rubbed his eyes and scooted up on the bed to take his coffee. “Thanks. And how are we going to do that?”
“The Urayuli are children. Sweets and stuff to play with will be enough. The lynx…” She sipped her drink again and considered all the options she’d gone over a hundred times during the night. “Maybe a hare. But if it is a totem in spiritual form only, we’ll have to use what it’s interested in. Which is the Urayuli.”
“So one trap to catch something to set another trap.” Ransom’s face scrunched up as he thought about it. “I don’t know. We’re not actually going to capture the Urayuli, are we? I don’t think that would win us points any which way. And doesn’t the totem have to give itself over? We can’t just grab it if it shows up.”
Yes, there were holes in her plan, but she couldn’t think of anything else that didn’t involve endless walking in the woods hoping to get lucky. “We’re here to help the Urayuli. It’s not like we’re going to hurt them. I’m hoping the totem will sense that and just, you know, poof. Make everything right again.”
“I don’t think it’s going to be that easy, babe.” He took a gulp of coffee and winced at the heat. It didn’t stop him from smiling his I’ve-got-naughty-thoughts smile. “But do you know what’s easy? Me.”
Kinley hopped off the bed before he could nab her. Why must everything end up being about sex? There were missing kids out there and a totem creating havoc. Who knew what it was doing with the Urayuli. Anything was possible. It wasn’t as if the creatures of myth were known for their kindness. The old legends usually ended in blood and death.
“Kin?” Ransom sat up, cocking his head as he regarded her.
She turned her back to him and set her coffee down to pull on her fleece sweater. “Let’s get dressed and ready. Today will be the day.”
It turned out that it was not the day. In fact, they didn’t come across one new sign of the Urayuli in the area. Kinley carried around a six pack of cola all day, and it remained unopened by the time they returned to the lodge.
Frustration and lack of sleep had put her on edge. The kids needed her to rescue them. The shifters of the world needed her to find the totem. She’d made a promise to her mom.
Kinley yanked the backpack off her shoulders and flung it into a corner. Not that she wanted to fight a giant again, but at least then she had known what to do.
Ransom slipped off his coat and flashed her a weary smile. “Hey, let’s go have a drink and something to eat. Clyde’s out there and an old girlfriend—”
“I do not want to meet another one of your old girlfriends.” Whoa. Never once had she ever snapped at him. She hadn’t even expected to say anything of the sort to him. But when he mentioned having a drink and an old girlfriend, she couldn’t stop herself.
“What?” Ransom’s eyes went wide and his body tensed.
Well, since she did say something, she had to explain. As long as she was rational about it, it would be fine. Right? “I don’t want to meet another one of your exes. It’s uncomfortable. No, more than uncomfortable. I only had one boyfriend before you, and he’s gone, somewhere in Oregon, maybe. It doesn’t matter. I’d never think to introduce you to him. It would be unfair to your feelings. And lately, it’s been like a parade with you. Old girlfriends coming from all over. And kissing you. On the lips.”
Her calm coolness fled. She clenched her jaw to keep from yelling at him. This was not how this conversation was supposed to go.
He let out a long breath and took a step toward her. “Kin, I had no idea you felt that way. I didn’t even think—”
“Exactly. You didn’t even think about how I might feel.” Yup, coolness totally gone. “You didn’t tell Victoria to stop kissing you. You didn’t tell Yvette to get off of you. You didn’t even introduce me to them as your girlfriend. Now you want me to meet another old girlfriend? Do you honestly think this is okay?”
His lips thinned as he shook his head and held up his hands in front of him. “I didn’t know how much it bothered you. Really, I didn’t, and I’m sorry for that.” He said each word with a slow calm. “But I didn’t want to take you out there to one of my exes. It’s Clyde’s ex that’s there, and I thought you might get a kick out of her as I do. Yvette, I guess no one told you, she’s married. Her husband is a trucker and gone most of the year. She’s like a little sister to me. Maybe she crushed on me a while back, but we were never a couple.”
Oh shit.
“And as for Victoria, yes, once upon a time we were together. And I say that loosely.” Ransom sighed. “She took my virginity. But she no longer has any real interest in me. Before you ask how I know, I’ll tell you. She likes young and inexperienced men. I’m way too old and savvy for her now. Her affection is… well, it’s her.”
Kinley had it all wrong. Her shoulders slumped. She never wanted to jump to conclusions, to be that girlfriend who verbally assaulted her boyfriend for every little thing. She hated those women. And look what she had become.
She had ruined the best thing that had ever happened to her.
“This is the part where you tell me I’m not that old.” He raised a brow.
Hanging her head, she ran one hand through her hair and clasped her bear charm with the other. “This isn’t funny.”
“No, it isn’t funny. In our own way, we just had our first fight. Here I’d been worrying our relationship was too perfect.” Ransom lifted a hand and caressed her cheek.
He’d been worried about the same thing she was? They talked all the time. Deep things, personal things. But clearly they weren’t talking about the things they needed to be talking about. They weren’t perfect.
Yes!
No. No, that wasn’t good enough. She wanted things to be perfect between them.
“I am kind of disappointed in you, though.” Ransom drew back, his eyes without their twinkle. “Sure, maybe I could have handled those situations differently, but I didn’t know it bothered you. I didn’t think you were the type to jump to conclusions.”
She wasn’t. Not usually. But she’d never fell so fast and hard for someone. Never for a man who was gorgeous, smart, and charming. Certainly not one who cared for her as much as she cared for him.
She’d fucked things up. Her hand hurt as she squeezed her necklace tighter. “I’m sorry. I…”
How could she defend herself? She couldn’t.
“I’m going to go have a drink. Maybe go for a walk.” Ransom walked to the door and opened it. “I’m not sure when I’ll be back. Make sure you get something to eat, some rest too. You’ve been wearing yourself thin lately.”
Kinley raised a hand to reach for him, but she couldn’t manage any words. He left, and she stared at the closed door for almost three minutes afterward.
Was the door closing the end of their relationship? Wh
at did he mean when he said he wasn’t sure when he’d be back? It could be that he wouldn’t be back. Oh God.
She swallowed a whimper. It was a stupid mistake. She should have said something right after the Victoria incident. Ransom would have known she was bothered by it, and she would have found out that Victoria was a vampiric cougar. Jokes would’ve been made and everything would’ve been fine.
Instead she held it in just as she sucked back any emotional problems in her life. To be the strong one. The one no one had to worry about.
But Ransom did worry about her. Even as he was leaving a few minutes ago, he told her to eat and rest. He cared.
Kinley bent over and scooped up his coat. He couldn’t go for a walk without it. She’d bring it to him. Her gesture to show she cared too.
She hurried down the hall through the main room and to the bar. Clyde stood behind the counter. Three men and one woman sat around one of the tables. Kinley stopped at the entrance. No sign of Ransom.
“Looking for your man?” Clyde smiled at her and motioned to the exit at the other side of the room. “He went out that way. Gone to chase bunnies or something.”
Telling him thank you, Kinley trotted to the door and opened it up to the cold night air. She stepped onto a snow covered patio and closed the door quick as not to let in a chill. It took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust, but she spotted the flash of movement by a copse of pine trees.
“Ransom?” When he didn’t reply, she walked off the patio toward the evergreens. A pile of his clothing sat beside the trunk of one tree. Having shifted, he wouldn’t need his coat then.
She glanced over her shoulder at the lodge. No. She wasn’t going to let this twist and roil in her gut. She’d find him and tell him everything she felt, make a real apology.
Donning his coat, Kinley breathed in his scent upon it. So good. She didn’t need his smell to track him. His prints were clear in the snow. Even with the mist in the woods, she could find him as long as he didn’t jump the river or anything.
“Ransom.” She hollered his name again so he’d know she was looking for him and not go any farther than he had. Weaving through the trees, she came out on the other side a few minutes later. In a cemetery.
She spotted Ransom as he leapt over a grave marker and stopped, suddenly still. From behind a large stone three graves over, a second lynx stepped toward him. They regarded each other in silence for half a minute before Ransom approached the other feline.
How often did he come across wild lynxes? Kinley avoided bears, and it was easy enough to do so. Not that she couldn’t put even a big male in his place, but she had no desire to get in a fight over territory or have some big boar choose her to be his mate.
The strange lynx held up a paw. Was it a shifter too? That definitely was not a natural action.
Ransom chuffed softly and raised his paw as if he was going to give the other cat five. As he touched the other one, they disappeared.
It wasn’t as if Kinley had even blinked. They were just gone.
“Ransom?” Kinley took a few steps into the cemetery. He was gone. “Ransom!”
She ran over to the spot he’d been. There were his tracks, and just like she had witnessed, he had vanished from the spot he’d been standing. What was even weirder, the other lynx left no tracks.
The totem.
Maybe this was a good thing. It could be giving Ransom the token right now. But then why did it disappear with him?
The elk totem tested Ametta. She had to go through a whole crazy haunted house for it. Perhaps the lynx was doing the same with Ransom. Kinley didn’t doubt his cleverness or physical prowess. Whatever the totem had in store for him, he could do it.
Right?
Kinley hugged herself, chewing on her lower lip. She shouldn’t have any doubt. But she wished she could help. Being useless wasn’t something she liked to feel.
The totem picked who it wanted to pick. She needed to accept this and… what? Wait? It didn’t seem as though there was any other choice in the matter.
Find him.
She shivered. Yes, she knew she had to find Brayden. But now—
Twigs snapped and snow crunched as someone approached the cemetery from the other side. Her breath hitched when one of the Urayuli came into view… carrying flowers?
The bushman hadn’t looked her way. Its focus was on a plain stone which stood two feet high. Kneeling down, it brushed the snow off the top of the marker and laid the flowers in front of it.
Even having been way too close to a zombie giant, this was the oddest thing she’d ever seen.
Tawny fur covered his body, and some hung together in muddy mats. His face resembled a gorilla’s, but his eyes were set farther apart. Eyes glimmering with emotion…
Wait. Brayden’s father died last year. Could it be him?
Kinley swallowed and raised a hand in a little wave. “Brayden?”
The Urayuli grunted with surprise and stood. He stared at her with very human eyes. Oh yes. Young and scared. It was he.
“Brayden.” Kinley repeated his name, speaking in a soft tone. “My name is Kinley. I’m here to help you. I can find a way to change you back.”
Brayden huffed, a sound that seemed to say he didn’t believe her.
“I really can help you. I know things… magic things.” It wasn’t time to explain the totem to him, but any child could understand magic. She hesitantly took a few steps toward him.
He snarled and clenched his fists. The last thing she needed was him throwing a gravestone at her. Even as a bear that would hurt. Instead she stopped and dug her hands into the coat pockets. There! Ransom always had something in his pockets to nibble on.
She held up a granola bar. “Look. It’s one of the good kinds with chocolate chips in it. Are you hungry?”
Brayden’s eyes lit up, and he nodded, holding out his hand.
“Let me open it for you.” Kinley tore open the wrapper and walked close enough he could stretch out his arm to touch her. Her heart pounded. He was huge and stinky. How had she not noticed the unwashed stench before? She held the bar on the palm of her open hand. “Here you go.”
He plucked it up and put the entire thing in his mouth. He chewed noisily and with great enthusiasm. Swallowing, he let out a satisfied “Aaaah.”
She smiled and tried not to breathe in too deeply. “It’s good, isn’t it? It’s my favorite kind. Though I really prefer chocolate chip cookies.”
Brayden bobbed his head vigorously and pointed to his mouth.
“More? I don’t have anything else on me.” She checked the pockets just to make certain of it. “But, if you promise to wait, I’ll go inside the lodge and bring out more snacks.”
He looked in the direction of the lodge and pondered her offer. Heaving a great sigh, he shook his head and gazed down at the stone.
“I’m sorry about your dad.” Kinley tilted her head so she could see the name. Milton Ward. Yes, this was definitely Brayden, and he had retained enough of himself to visit his father’s grave. “I lost my mom when I was a kid too. I actually just found out she came here to Newhalen a lot before I was born. I still miss her a lot, sometimes so much it hurts.”
A sound similar to a whimper came from him, but then he barked much more excitedly. He pointed repeatedly to the gravestone and then himself.
What the hell did he mean? Did he wish he was dead too? Because she was not helping him with that. “What are you trying to tell me?”
Faster than she thought he could move, his big hand clasped her wrist and slapped their hands on top of the cold stone. Her palm stung, but her whole body tingled, a sensation similar to static electricity. The hairs on the back of her neck stood as a wave of dizziness washed over her.
It was like someone was rapidly flicking on and off the lights. Except they were outside. Night, day, night, day, night, day.
When it stopped, it was twilight. Or dawn? A hint of light came from the east and from the west.
The hand o
n her wrist no longer encircled it. The fingers were smaller and hairless. A boy smiled at her. Not just any boy, Brayden. She’d found him, and he was back to normal. Had Ransom earned the totem’s token?
Except something wasn’t right. Not just the sky, but the trees. They’d been smaller before. Same with the cemetery. Why were there more graves?
“Come on. I can’t wait to show you!” Brayden let go and motioned for her to follow him as he ran toward the woods.
The second Kinley turned, the whispers assaulted her. She cried out and fell to her knees as she covered her ears with her hands. As if that would help. So many voices, she couldn’t tell one from the other. It was like every spirit in the world tried to talk to her at once.
“Kinley?” Brayden returned to her side and put a hand on her shoulder. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”
She barely heard him. How could she explain this psychic assault? It had never been like this. Even those times when she was learning to control her gift. She didn’t want to scare him either.
Breathe and concentrate. Focus on one thing, tune the rest out. Brayden’s presence next to her. His quick heartbeat and warm hand. She’d found him. And if she’d saved him, she could find the rest of the missing children. All of them could be returned to their families.
The voices still buzzed in her ears, but the intensity lessened. She rose and offered a small smile. “I’m okay. I sometimes hear messages in the wind, and they’re very loud here.”
“I know why.” The boy grinned, young and mischievous. She imagined Ransom had been a lot like Brayden when he was twelve. “Let me show you.”
Brayden skipped onward again, and Kinley picked up her pace to keep him in her sights. The cool mist still blanketed the forest, but it sat low on the ground. It swirled around their legs as they darted between the trees.
Ahead, the river roared as it met the lake. The trees thinned and opened to rocky ground leading to the Iliamna River. Over the water, she could make out a wide footbridge. But there wasn’t a bridge.
This didn’t make sense. An unnatural sky and a bridge that didn’t exist. Was she dreaming? No, she was far too aware of herself and everything around her.
Ghost Cat (Totem Book 5) Page 6