by Toni Aleo
I laugh. “Me too, but I get you.”
She wrings her fingers together, letting out a breath. Her shoulders are taut, and I can tell she’s going back and forth in her mind. “I bet you wished it was someone else sitting here, eh?”
I smile as I shake my head before turning to her. She’s so beautiful, and yeah, I would like to take her upstairs and do the naughtiest things in the world, but I don’t want to disrespect her. She deserves better, and she’ll get it when she’s ready.
Reaching up, I cup her face as I say, “When I said earlier that you are the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen, I wasn’t lying.”
Looking deep into my eyes, she says, “Yeah, because you were drunk.”
“No, because it’s the truth,” I say softly. “You are beautiful, and I wouldn’t want to be anywhere right now but with you.”
She looks away, her face moving from my hand as she shrugs. Looking out at the ocean, she sucks in a deep breath and then stands quickly. “Shit, I gotta piss.”
I stand too, feeling like I have whiplash from the fact that she can’t take a compliment. It’s kind of cute and only makes me want to compliment her more.
Smiling, I clear my throat and say, “Let me walk with you. You’re drunk and so are a lot of people here. I don’t trust anyone, plus I locked my door so no one can get in.”
“Thanks,” she says as we start to walk toward the house. “I can use the hall bathroom, though.”
“Ew, no, people have been puking in there,” I laugh and she smiles.
“Good point.”
As we walk, our hands keep brushing against each other, teasing me, and I honestly can’t handle it. We are almost to the house when I finally take ahold of her hand. I lace my fingers with hers, and when she glances over at me, I let out a breath. She looks down at our hands and back up at me.
“What are you doing?”
I shrug, squeezing her hand with mine. “I’ll never see you again, so I’m gonna touch you—within your boundaries, of course—while I can.”
She smiles. “So what’s next? You gonna kiss me?”
I feel like that’s an invitation, but I’m not one hundred percent sure.
I don’t answer her as I open the door for her, but when she glances up at me and her eyes lock with mine, I find myself one hundred percent sure that that was my opening.
Kicking myself internally, I pray for another chance as I say, “Maybe.”
When she looks back at me, a sneaky little grin on her face, I know I’ll get another chance.
And when I do, I’m taking it.
Shit.
I’m drunk.
After using the bathroom, I stand, a bit wobbly as I look at my reflection in the mirror. Thankfully, or at least I think so, I look decent. My hair is still in its braid, but my lipstick is a little smeared, so I reach for the rag I used earlier to wipe it off as my heart hammers against my chest.
I can still feel his hand in mine.
It felt so damn good. His hand was warm and so much larger than mine. My dad says that my hands are small so they are quick, but somewhere inside me, I feel like they are small just to be enveloped in Jayden’s large hand.
Oh. My. God.
The Jack has me thinking like a pathetic little schoolgirl who has a crush on the big, sexy jock. Shit. And then, that’s not all it has me doing. No, it has me wanting to touch him. Everywhere. Like with my hands, my tongue, my mouth, my body, every single fiber of my being, I want to touch him.
But what will happen if I do?
We’ll fuck. Yeah. That’s a given, but what about afterward? Do I just walk away? Never talk to him again? Or do I try? And what if he doesn’t want to try? What if he is only saying all these amazingly sweet things, baring his soul to me, to get laid? But that doesn’t seem right! I can read dudes, I’m basically a pseudo dude, and he isn’t like them. He’s nice. Caring, confident, funny, and Lord is he gorgeous, but most of all… Fuck, I think that he believes in me. That alone has me wanting to jump his bones and ride him until the final buzzer.
Which I pray never comes.
Pressing my face into my hands, I suck in a deep breath. I don’t know what to do. A part of me wants to say fuck it and wrap my arms around him, kissing him senseless in the hopes that he’ll lay me down in that bed. But the other part of me knows that’s a bad idea. I’m worth more than a one-night stand, and I’m pretty damn sure we both know that this will never go anywhere after this. We are both on two different roads. Maybe one day, we’ll come back together, but even that doesn’t feel right. We have two very different lives. This isn’t Grease. We won’t meet up again and start singing about him being the one that I want. That kind of shit doesn’t happen in real life. We can try the long-distance thing, but does that ever really work? No. It doesn’t. That’s why my mom left, because she couldn’t handle my dad being gone and raising me. Or at least that’s one of the many theories my dad and I came up with.
Who knows? But I do know that Jayden Sinclair is a game I can’t win.
And he is one that scares the living shit out of me.
When a knock comes at the door, I drop my hands and reach for the handle, pulling it open. Jayden stands there, looking at me, all sexy and expectant.
“You all right? Not puking?”
I laugh. “I don’t puke. I can handle my liquor.”
“Wouldn’t expect anything less,” he says with a teasing tone as I reach into my pocket for my lipstick.
Painting it on my lips, I can feel him watching me and I like it. Like, a lot. I don’t know, maybe it feeds my ego since no one but my dad has ever told me I’m beautiful. I get called hot all the time, but he’s the first to look me in my eyes and tell me that. He not only spoke it, his eyes screamed it. It’s kinda intoxicating the way he makes me feel. I don’t even feel like myself. I feel…different.
“Red, your favorite color?”
I glance over at him and nod. “Yeah, it’s the only color I wear.”
“Can I ask why?”
I shrug. “You can ask whatever you like.”
The smile he gives me is downright dirty, but he laughs it off before asking, “Fine, tell me.”
Leaning against the counter, I twirl the tube in my hand before letting the breath I’m holding out. “I, um, didn’t have a mom, obviously.”
“Yeah,” he says, matching my stance but against the doorframe.
“I got to like fourteen and wanted to be like the other girls since I was so hard-core in hockey. And my dad took me to the drugstore, handed me a tube of red lipstick, and told me that’s the only thing pretty girls need. Been wearing it ever since.”
I look up to find him with a small smile pulling the side of his mouth up. His eyes are hooded, sensual, and everything inside me catches on fire. I feel his gaze on every inch of me. The hairs on my arms and the back of my neck are standing at attention just from being under his heated gaze. When his eyes fall to my lips, I suck in a deep breath, my lips parting, and I wait.
If he kisses me…I’m done.
“It’s very classic, brings out your eyes,” he mentions, and crazily enough, my heart sinks because he doesn’t move. “And your dad sounds like a smart man. He’s right, you need nothing else to bring out your beauty.”
My mouth pulls up at the side as my cheeks redden. “No?”
He shakes his head, tucking his hands into his pockets, causing the shorts to slide down some, showing a little strip of his abs. It’s almost like he smacked me with lust because I’m taken back to hours before when he was gloriously naked. Blinking dumbly, I look up to his face and I am fighting to breathe. The look in his eyes has me on edge. I feel like I’m being pulled to him. Almost like he is the light and I’m the dumbass bug on my way to bug heaven.
And what a heavenly temple he’d be to explore.
When the door opens suddenly, we both turn to see Jude coming through on his phone. “Baby, I’m sorry. Yeah. I’m drunk. I know. This place is a fuckin
g madhouse and I can’t leave. No, I would never hook up with anyone but you. Be real. No, Claire. I love you. Only you.”
When he realizes we are in the room, he says to us, “Shit, sorry. Some dumbass is fucking in my bed.”
I don’t say anything, but when I glance at Jayden, he cocks his head in a get-the-hell-out motion. Jude then holds up his free hand before saying, “But I’ll find somewhere quiet to talk to my girlfriend.”
“Kick them out,” Jayden says with a shrug. “And lock your door. That’s what I did.”
“True, thanks, sorry again,” he says, and then he leaves as quickly as he came in.
Jayden looks over at me and I giggle as he grins sheepishly. “Sorry, he’s a dumbass,” he groans. “I swear I’m the smartest one out of all of us.”
I laugh and then that reminds me of something. “I have a question.”
“Sure,” he says looking right at me, his eyes so dark as they lock with mine. They were a lighter green earlier, but I find when he is emotional, or maybe it’s the alcohol, they darken a bit. It’s amazing to see. His eyes say so much more than his body does.
It’s beautiful.
Swallowing hard since it is taking everything in me to focus on anything but kissing this guy, I say, “You said you had a sister earlier.”
He nods. “Yeah, Lucy.”
“Why isn’t she a J name?”
He chuckles as he pushes up the wall, standing straighter. “What happened was, my mom is a huge Beatles fan. So Lucy, “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds,” and then Jude, “Hey Jude,” but then when I was coming, I was supposed to be Maxwell, from “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer,” but my dad flipped and said he was tired of the Beatles names. So since me and Jude are so close in age, she decided to go with another J name and named me after my granddaddy. So, Jayden Mitchell the second right here.”
“Cool,” I say, and I like learning about his family. I didn’t have anyone but my dad growing up, and the whole aspect of siblings fascinates me. I mean, I had hockey brothers and sisters, but actual blood family that has to love you and not be jealous of you is so neat to me.
When his grin falls to a straight line, I’m surprised by his quick change in emotion. He was grinning just a second ago. It must be the alcohol, but then I realize it’s because of something else.
His dad.
“What?”
“The Jack has me feeling things I’ve done well to lock up the last couple months,” he says, pulling in a breath through his nose.
“Tell me,” I ask.
Working his lip, he shrugs before meeting my gaze. “I’m Jayden Mitchell, right? Well, Jude is Jude Marshall, but my dad, he could never get that right. He always got us confused, and it drove me insane. I mean, I understand that you get kid’s names confused, there are a lot of us. But for the longest time, he was convinced that I was Jayden Marshall. I don’t know. It didn’t matter to Jude ’cause he hates him either way, but me, it bothered me. Ya know?”
I nod. “It would bother me. He is your dad.”
“Right?”
“But at least he knows your name. My mom didn’t even name me.”
His face softens as he nods slowly. “That’s really fucked up.”
“Yeah, but I like that my dad named me Baylor. I think it’s a good name.”
“Pretty name for a beautiful girl,” he says without looking at me.
When he looks up at me, grinning, I look away quickly and ask, “Why did you kick Ju-de out? He could have stayed.”
When he starts to laugh, I look up, confused. “You really can’t take a compliment can you?” he asks me and I shrug.
“Shh, you,” I say, waving him off. I know that, yes, I can’t take a compliment. I love them, and they make me feel all special and shit, but usually people lie. But with Jayden, he isn’t lying, he’s talking from his heart and that scares me. In just the little time I’ve spent with him, I know that his little brother’s words are true. Jayden doesn’t talk unless there is meaning behind his words. So yeah, we need to change the subject here.
Looking up, I ask again, “So why?”
He shrugs, looking down at the ground. “It’s nice just me and you.”
Elated, but trying to keep that tucked inside, I smile before nodding. “Yeah.”
“Yeah,” he agrees, and soon, I’m drinking in his profile.
I’ve been looking at him all day; I mean, how could I ignore him? But now, with no distractions and wonderful lighting, I can really look at him. His skin is soft, but there is small scarring, probably from acne as a teenager. The scruff on his jaw is lighter brown than the hair on his head. His lashes are long and curve in such a pretty way. His lips, they are full and plump, making me jealous since mine are kind of thin. He really does have a beautiful mouth.
When he looks at me quickly, a grin pulling at his lips, I realize I said that out loud.
Fuck. Me.
“Um, thanks,” he says, chuckling. “Never been told I have a beautiful mouth.”
Biting into my lip, I close my eyes, thinking how stupid I am, but then I’m not, because he does. And oh man, I need to kiss him. I need to kiss him now, or I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. My stomach is in knots at the mere thought, but I have to ignore it. I also need to ignore the fact it’s sad that I can’t even remember the last kiss I had where I really wanted to kiss someone. It had to be Seth because I don’t remember anyone before or after that, and I know that’s because I did anything and everything to forget my time with that jackass.
But with Jayden, I know I won’t ever forget.
I couldn’t if I tried.
Opening my eyes, I meet his heated gaze as my heart pounds against my ribs. I don’t even know what to do, and I beg him with my eyes to take the lead, but he doesn’t move. My body is trembling with need for him, and I just need him to do something. Something to help me out.
“Baylor,” he whispers as his eyes search mine.
“Yeah?”
“I’m going to tell you something, and I want you not to change the subject, okay?” he says, turning his body to mine.
He’s so much bigger than me. Towering over me in the most delectable way. His shoulders basically fill the doorway, and the way his eyes are trained on me, almost like he is calculating the biggest shot of his life, has me burning with desire.
Sucking in a breath, I say, “Okay.”
Reaching out, he takes my face in his hands, bringing me in close. Our bodies line up together, barely touching as his eyes bore into mine. My breathing is all over the place, my chest rising and falling against his. I can feel his heart pounding in his chest or maybe it’s mine, I don’t know. But I’m lost in his eyes, and I don’t want to ever be found.
“You, Baylor… Wait, what’s your middle name?”
I suck in a deep breath, my hands shaking at my sides as his thumb traces the spot below my bottom lip. I can’t believe I am having a hard time remembering my middle name, but thankfully it comes, and I say, “Irene. After my grandma.”
He smiles as he nods. “Such a classic, gorgeous name.”
My heart soars because I think so too. I love my name. Breathlessly, I search his eyes, and they remind me of a song I heard once, about falling for someone’s eyes but not knowing the person. I never related my life to a song, but right now, it sums up everything I’m feeling. And sweet Lord above, I’m done. Put a fork in me. I’m done.
I’m done fighting.
“You, Baylor Irene Moore, are the most gorgeous and driven and smartest woman I’ve ever set eyes on. You’re not even gone yet, and I miss you.”
Tears sting my eyes as he holds my gaze, but I won’t cry. No matter how good he is making me feel or how drunk I am, I hold in that emotion. I don’t cry over guys. I don’t cry over anyone.
“Jayden,” I whisper, and he nods as his eyes drop to my lips.
“Yeah?”
“Kiss me.”
It’s like the room catches on fire when his eyes mee
t mine. He doesn’t move, and everything inside me is shaking. I want him so damn bad. He’s like the Jack that is coursing through my veins, taking me to another world. He removes all my inhibition, and while it scares the fuck out of me, I don’t care.
I want him.
“Please,” I practically beg. “I need you to kiss me.”
Running his tongue along his lips in the most erotic way, he slowly nods. “I was gonna kiss you before you asked, but I had to stop and make sure to never ever forget this moment.”
Before I can say anything, though really, I have no clue what I was going to say, his lips are dropping to mine, and I swear I am a puddle of goo once they touch mine. Melting against him, I bring my arms up and around his neck, holding him close as he holds me hostage to his lips. As he presses me against the sink, his hands trail down my body, setting every inch of me on fire as our mouths move together like they were meant to. Grasping my hips in his hands, he presses into me, his hard length taking my breath, causing me to open my mouth to his. When his tongue invades my mouth, I’m stunned. His kiss is like a fucking trance.
Wrapping his arms tightly around my waist, he lifts me up, and instinctively I wrap my legs around his waist. Holding him close between my thighs. He groans against my mouth, and then we are moving out of the bathroom. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t dizzy. Between his kisses, the way he feels against me, the Jack, and the lust, I’m a fucking mess.
But I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Dropping me on the bed, he kisses down my jaw, my throat, as my arms lay bonelessly on the mattress. Arching my back, I want to become one with him. I want to encase myself inside of him and allow him to do what he pleases. I’ve never wanted someone the way I want him, and at this point, the last thing I’m thinking about is tomorrow.
All that matters is right now.
Taking me by the back of the neck, his other hand braces up against the bed as his dick presses into me before he brings my mouth to his. Reaching for his shirt, I pull up at it, getting it out of the way so I can push his shorts down, but then he is stopping me.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” he says so many times, I’m dizzy.