by A. M. Miller
Raven looked back at the man. He opened the door and the sound of soft blues drifted out into the street. He looked back at her.
Raven’s hands twisted around the handles of her bike. “I don’t want to bother-“
“You won’t. Ain’t no trouble to help a lady out.” The man’s smile was soft and warm.
“Thank you.”
Raven walked her bike to the rack. After locking it, she followed the man inside. The sign above the counter read “Bobby’s BBQ”. A mouth-watering aroma of grilled meat wafted out from the kitchen. There was a light buzz of conversation with the sound of a woman belting out soulful tunes in the background. The old man weaved through the tables. Raven followed close behind, careful not to draw attention. She kept her head down, but everyone seemed too involved with their meal to notice her.
“Why don’t you take a seat over there. I’ll be back with a rag,” The old man said. He gestured towards an empty table. Raven sat down. She fidgeted in her chair. The need to run was still at the back of her mind, but she didn’t want to be rude. Her headache was fading and her nose had stopped bleeding. There was no reason to be afraid now, but she couldn’t bring herself to calm.
The man returned and offered Raven a rag. She took it, the cold damp rag soothing against her hot skin.
“Better?” the old man asked.
Raven nodded. She felt awkward, but it was better knowing she didn’t look as bad as before. Glancing around, her eyes fell on the sign again.
“So your name’s Bobby,” Raven said looking back at the old man.
The old man smiled. “Yeah, that’s me and this old rundown whole in the wall is my restaurant.”
“It’s nice.”
Bobby’s BBQ was not the fanciest but it had its appeal. The furniture was simple. There were about seven wooden tables. Light from the windows gave the room a warm glow and photos of satisfied customers hung on the walls.
“No need for flattery, miss. I know she may not look like much but I keep her clean and the food’s good.” Bobby pulled out a notebook and flipped it open. “Speaking of good food, why don’t I get you something to eat? Is there anything you’d like?”
Raven tensed. She didn’t have any money on her. Bobby would probably kick her to the curb once he found out she was broke. She wasn’t ready to go back.
“A glass of water would be nice,” Raven said.
“Anything else with that?”
Raven stared down at her hands. There was a spot of blood caked in the corner of her nail. She could feel the weight of Bobby’s stare.
“No, I’m not hungry.” The moment the words left her mouth, Raven’s stomach let out a loud growl in protest.
Raven’s face grew hot. “Maybe I should just go.” Raven stood up and tripped over the leg of the chair. Bobby's hand grabbed onto her arm to steady her.
“No need to go running off. Have a seat and I’ll see what Drew’s cooking, ” Bobby said.
“But I-“
“It’s on the house.” Bobby smiled.
Raven nodded. Under normal circumstances, she would have refused but she was too tired to turn down kindness. Her legs ached whenever she moved. She wanted a chance to catch her breath and Bobby’s restaurant seemed as good as any other place.
Bobby walked back to the kitchen. Raven watched as he disappeared behind the door. Her face twisted in a grimace. With Bobby gone she no longer felt the need to hide her pain. She placed her head in her hands. Raven closed her eyes. Her fingertips massaged at her temples.
There was a sudden prickling of the hairs on the back of Raven’s neck. She opened her eyes. Someone was watching. Her eyes scanned the room. Everyone seemed oblivious of her presence, lost in their own worlds. She tried to convince herself that she was paranoid, but it did nothing to ease the tension. It grew harder to ignore.
Raven, the voice whispered.
Raven turned to face the window. A little girl stood with her hand pressed to the glass. Her head was bowed. Long black strands blocked her face from view. The white nightgown she wore blended in with her pale white skin. Raven’s heart raced as she struggled to breathe. Her eyes widened in horror.
Help me, Raven, the girl’s voice whispered inside her mind. Help me destroy them.
“Hope you like pulled pork,” Bobby said. His voice made Raven jump. She turned to see Bobby placing the plate on the table.
“Something wrong?” Bobby asked.
“I-“ Raven started but stopped. When she turned back toward the window the girl was gone.
Raven’s throat tightened. She couldn’t think of anything to say.
A glass of water sat next to her plate. Raven reached out to grab it but stopped when she noticed her hand shaking. She snatched her hand back.
“You okay?” Bobby asked.
“Yes,” Raven said, but knew her shaking voice wouldn’t fool anyone. “I’m just…”
“Having a rough day?”
Raven looked back at Bobby. There was no judgment in his soft brown eyes.
“Yeah, just one of those days,” Raven said.
“Want to talk about it?”
Raven shook her head. “Not really.” She wouldn’t even know where to begin.
“Want me to leave?” Bobby asked after a moment of silence.
“No,” Raven said. The desperation in her voice surprised her. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m sure you're busy. You don’t have to stay here.”
“Nah, it’s okay. It’s pretty slow right now,” Bobby said sitting down in the seat across from Raven. She felt relieved the moment he did. She didn’t want to be alone right now. She didn’t trust herself to be alone right now.
Raven smiled. “Are you always this nice to people you find standing outside your restaurant.”
Bobby chuckled. “No, not usually.”
“Why me?”
“You weren’t looking too hot when I found you,” Bobby said but Raven wasn’t convinced, “That and the fact that I’ve got a grandson about your age. Judging by your clothes I’d guess you two go to the same school. He’s a good boy but some of those people he hangs around are nothing but trouble. I hope that if he’s ever lost his way someone would be willing to help him.”
Raven smiled at Bobby. It was a nice thought. Whoever this mysterious boy was Raven thought he was lucky to have Bobby for a granddad.
“What’s his name?” Raven asked.
“Drake Murphy.”
Raven’s face fell. She thought of Drake laughing with his friends. Her fist clenched in her lap. She wondered how that jerk could possibly be related to Bobby. As much as she hated it she could see the similarities now that she knew what to look for. Bobby skin was a lighter brown but they had the same square jaw and downturned eyes.
“You know him.” Bobby could tell from her reaction.
“Not really. We don’t exactly hang in the same circles.”
“Well if he ever bothers you, just tell me. I’ll knock some sense into the boy.”
Raven pictured Bobby “knocking sense” into Drake. She imagined the tall basketball player cowering before the elderly man.
“Nice to see I finally got a real smile out of you,” Bobby said, leaning back in his chair.
Raven hadn’t noticed that she been smiling. It was a small smile but felt nice.
They continued to chat about simple things. Thoughts of voices and strange little girls were pushed to the back of her mind. Not gone, but if Raven focused on the soothing sound of Bobby’s voice, she could almost ignore them. They were talking about Christmas when the back door to the restaurant opened.
Bobby stood up from his chair “Drake.”
Raven froze the moment she heard his name. Bobby smiled at his grandson. Raven slouched down in her chair. She hoped that Drake wouldn’t see her but knew it would be impossible not to. If she had left earlier she could have avoided him. Bobby’s company had been so enjoyable she’d forgotten the time.
“Hey, granddaddy,” Drake sai
d.
Raven didn’t dare turn around.
“No practice today?” Bobby asked.
“Got canceled. I thought I’d come-“ Drake didn’t finish. His eyes landed on Raven. She watched as his eyes widened and brows crinkled.
“What are you doing here?” Drake asked.
“She was eating. What does it look like?” Bobby answered before Raven could.
Drake ignored him. His dark brown eyes remained locked on Raven.
“I should probably get going now.” Raven stood from her chair.
“Hold on now. You didn’t even finish your sandwich.“ Bobby pointed down at the uneaten pulled pork. ”Wait here and I’ll get you a to-go-box.”
Bobby left before Raven could stop him.
“What are you doing here?” Drake asked again.
Raven turned to face him. “I didn’t know this was your granddad’s place or else I wouldn’t have come.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just surprised. I heard about what happened at school, but I wasn’t expecting to see you here, ” Drake said.
“Like I said, it wasn’t planned.”
“What happened?”
Raven folded her arms, glaring at Drake. “I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”
“And I don’t get why you always got an attitude,“ Drake snapped.
Raven’s eyes widened and nostrils flared. “I’m sorry, is my attitude not to your liking? Should I bend over and kiss your ass like everyone else?”
“What did I ever do to you?”
“You treat me and my mom like a joke and I'm supposed to like you for it?”
“I never joked about your mother.”
“What the hell was that in the hallway then? What, you just wanted to know about the hospital my mother’s in out of general curiosity? Don’t bullshit me, Drake Murphy. I know who you are and I know what you’re about.”
“You don’t know shit about me.“
Drake seemed to be getting upset, which Raven found laughable. Guys like him were always treating people like dirt but still expected to be treated like kings. Not today. Raven didn’t have time to cater to his ego.
“Here you go,” Bobby said, returning from the kitchen, to-go-box in hand.
Raven turned away from the grandson. She smiled as she accepted the box from Bobby. “Thank you so much for today.”
“No, thank you. It was a pleasure talking to you, Miss Raven,” Bobby said before turning to Drake. “Drake would you mind giving Raven a ride home.”
“That won’t be necessary. I can find my way back,” Raven said. The last thing she wanted was to spend more time with Drake.
“I have no doubt that you can but this way I can be sure you made it back safe,” Bobby said.
Raven had a feeling arguing with Bobby would be pointless. Bobby had already done so much for her without asking for anything in return. Rejecting Drake would be fine but rejecting Bobby would be rude. Her mother had raised her to be respectful.
“Okay, but only if Drake doesn’t mind,” Raven said hoping Drake would refuse.
Bobby looked at his grandson. “It would be his pleasure.”
Drake forced a smile. They were both screwed.
Raven waved to Bobby at the door. The moment they left the restaurant so did all the warmth in Raven’s body. She pulled her arms closer in, blocking out the cold wind. Any security she’d felt inside of Bobby’s restaurant had vanished. She grabbed her bike and followed Drake to the parking lot.
Raven knew which car was his the moment she saw it. The silver Impala was dented on the side and the left rear view mirror was missing. Rust formed around the wheels and bumper. The hood of the car had been replaced and the black metal stuck out against the mostly silver body. Raven had seen the eyesore in the school parking lot before but she’d never known whom it belonged to.
Drake passed Raven, pressing the keypad to unlock the car. “Come on, we’ll put your bike in the back.”
The Impala wasn’t equipped with a bike rack. Drake helped her get the bike in the back and Raven did her best not to add any new scratches to the car. When they finished Raven moved around to the passenger side.
“Hold on. I have to open it from the inside,” Drake said.
Raven watched as Drake climbed in from the driver's side and reached over to push her door open. Raven looked down at the car seat. There was a plastic pink tiara sitting there. Drake grabbed it and tossed it to the back. Raven arched a brow at him but said nothing as she climbed in.
Raven buckled her seatbelt. She tried to shift away from Drake, but the whole car was full of his scent and presence.
“Where do you stay?” Drake asked.
Raven told him as they pulled out of the parking lot. Drake turned on the radio. Raven did her best to ignore him, shifting closer to the window. The music wasn’t bad and if she kept her eyes focused on the outside world she could almost forget who she was riding with.
“Raven.”
Raven sighed and turned back to look at him. “What?”
Drake glanced over at her. His jaw clenched and his hands tightened around the wheel. “Nothing.”
Raven rolled her eyes and returned her gaze back to the window. A few minutes later they pulled up in front of her house.
“Is this it?” Drake asked.
“Yup.”
Back when their family had been whole Michael had painted the outside of their house lilac purple. It was a present for her mother, a perfect match to the dream house she’d drawn as a kid. The paint made their house stick out like a sore thumb, but it had been their home. Now, most of the paint was chipped, only a few remaining patches of purple clinging on as if to remind them of what they use to be.
They both got out of the car. Drake helped Raven pull her bike from the back seat. It was just as hard getting it out as it had been getting it in.
Raven pulled the bike back over to the sidewalk. “Thanks for the ride.”
“Don’t thank me. Granddad seems to like you.”
“Yeah, it’s almost hard to believe you two are related.”
Drake glared at Raven. “What’s that suppose to mean?”
“You know exactly what I mean.”
Drake crossed his arms. “What the hell is your problem, Raven? I asked you one question and suddenly I’m enemy number one. I get that it might have sounded wrong but you won’t even let me explain.”
“Because I know what you meant. You think I don’t hear the jokes you and your friends make? Everyone thinks what happened to my mother is funny, but it’s not. None of you know what it’s like for her. You think she wanted to end up in a hospital? Do you think it’s fun for her? What she has is an illness. She didn’t ask for it and she sure as hell didn’t do anything to deserve it. You can’t even imagine the helplessness and the fear she felt. I’m so sick of people like you. I’m tired of being your joke. Why can’t you just leave us alone?”
Tears swelled in Raven’s eyes. She pushed them back. Crying in front of Drake again was not an option. Anger had allowed her thoughts to slip out. She inhaled and tried to calm herself. When she looked back at Drake her gaze was cold.
“Forget it, just tell Bobby I made it back safe.” Raven turned and started to walk her bike to the front door.
“Someone I know might be getting transferred to Corvix,” Drake said.
Raven froze midstep. She turned to see Drake’s brown eyes staring at her. He looked down at the hood of his car. “I thought maybe you might know a little more about it there. The website’s kind of shitty and everyone on the pamphlets looks too happy to be trustworthy. I just wanted to know from a personal experience what they’re really like. If she’s going to be… I just really want to know if they can help,” Drake said. He avoided looking at her but Raven could see it wasn’t easy for him to talk about. Whoever he was talking about was someone he cared for.
Raven was speechless. Of all the things that could have come out of his mouth, this was
one she’d never expected. She blinked a few times trying to gather her thoughts.
“I’m sorry I didn’t-”
“Know? Yeah, like I said you don’t know anything about me.” Drake opened his car door, but before getting inside he glanced back at Raven. “I get why you’re angry, Raven, but maybe next time you should try being a little less judgmental.”
Drake got into his car and Raven watched as he pulled off. She didn’t know what to feel watching him drive away. Guilt and embarrassment seemed to be the dominant two emotions. She wondered how many times in one day her world could be turned upside down.
Raven unlocked the door and stepped inside. She leaned her bike up against the hall wall. Walking over to the living room, she sat down on the couch and pulled her knees into her chest. Raven closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The clock on the wall ticked, counting the passing seconds.
Raven.
Raven’s head snapped up. Her eyes glanced around the empty living room. There were shadows all around her. She hadn’t bothered turning on the lights when she first came in. Raven didn’t know which would be worse, seeing someone or not seeing.
I’m here Raven, the voice echoed inside her head.
“God, please don’t let this be happening,” Raven’s eyes glistened with tears. She knew what this meant for her.
He can’t help, the voice said.
The last bit of control Raven was holding onto was lost. She fell apart. Her hands covered her ears, though she knew it wouldn’t help. Tears rolled down her cheeks.
“No,” Raven cried. Her sobs echoed through the house.
This had been something she’d feared could happen but never allowed herself to fully believe would. Now that she was alone there was no denying it. When she thought of all that had happened her heart sank with despair. She was losing her mind. Soon she’d share the same fate as her mother.
Thinking of her mother only made her cry harder.
No, Raven, the voice whispered, You’re not losing your mind; I’m opening it.
Raven felt a cold shiver run down her back. She could feel the girl's presence all around her.
“Go away. Leave me alone,” Raven shouted into the darkness.