“Thanks.” I give her a wink and take the envelope.
Pam sighs and curls a lock of her hair behind her ear. She’s pretty enough, blonde hair, blue eyes and a great personality. I’m just not attracted to her.
“Zeke...would you mind asking me to come to the barbeque Elsie was talking about? I’d love to go.” Her fingers slide over my arm again as she looks at me through her lashes. Unconsciously my eyes drift to Claudette who doesn’t even hide the hurt and jealousy written all over her face.
Her hands are tightened to fists, white from the clenching. What the hell? We were practically kids when she vanished; teenagers. I meant to tell her I wanted more but we never discussed it, I was too scared to throw away our friendship.
Yet again all of it becomes too much for me to deal with right now. And this also entails Pam. I don’t have any intention of hurting Claudette with dating someone else to get even. Fuck no. That’s not at all how my head, or this damn life works.
“No, Pam. The barbeque is family only and if it wasn’t...I’m not looking for a date or a damn girlfriend. Sorry, but I’m not your ticket in.” I gently tell her and yet my words are harsh enough to have her back off completely.
Pam gives me a reassuring smile. “Okay, no worries. I’ll ask Earle if he’s up for it.”
“You do that.” I shake my head at the indifference.
And that’s how it normally goes–one chick tries with one of us and if me or my brother rejects the woman hops to the other brother. Good thing we don’t work that way. Some chicks think it’s necessary to compare dudes, even more when they’re twins. Without looking back, I leave the gift shop and head for my truck.
My brother and I might look the same, but we’re two complete different people. He’s more laid back while I eat myself up inside most of the time and fuss over shit he would shrug his damn shoulders over.
Besides that? We don’t fall for the same chicks. I like the nerdy type, curvy with chestnut hair, slightly curly...glasses, high cheekbones and a cute as hell nose with freckles scattered over it. Fuck to hell and back...I just described Claudette to a T.
It might take another sixteen years to get over her. The curse of my family seems legit. Two of my brothers and both of my sisters are married, and all of them knew deep down that their person was it for them the first time they met. True love and all that shit. As a kid I knew Claudette was meant to be my friend...as I grew older I thought she was meant to be my whole world. Guess I was wrong.
I hit the gas and try to focus on the road and mentally adding things on my grocery list. That’s better than thinking of the shit I can’t seem to get a grip on anyway. This time I do wish I was more like my brother...he doesn’t have a care in the world, while I on the other hand still can’t shake the hurt and jealousy I saw on Claudette’s face when Pam slid her hand over my arm.
A knock on my window brings me out of my thoughts. Dammit. I need to keep my head into the now since I was already parked in front of the grocery store. I really should clear my head, damn dangerous driving like that. Beau steps away from the door, allowing me to get out of my truck.
“Hey, Zeke.” He slaps me on my shoulder. “How’ve you been doin’? Still not sleeping well?”
Beau had a relationship with Claudette’s older sister, Geraldine. He might be the only one who understands how it’s been for the last sixteen years. Well, now with one damn difference, Geraldine’s not coming back since she died that night.
“I’ve been sleeping well, ever since Claudette stumbled back into town like nothin’ effin’ happened.” I grumble.
Beau stares at me wide eyed, face filled with panic while his mouth drops open, revealing a missing tooth. My brother knocked that one out years back and I guess he never got it fixed. It takes a moment before he schools himself. “No shit?”
“No shit, Beau. But that’s all I want to say about it. She should have stayed away, would have been better for all of us.” I tell him.
“I thought she was dead, man...I never expected her to still be alive after all these years.” Beau mutters as he scratches his chin.
“Well,” I sigh. “I don’t know what’s worse; sixteen years of hoping while deep down I thought she was already dead or have her cross my path expecting me to have a happy effin’ chat like we’re best effin’ buddies.”
“Yeah, yeah...for sure. Look, I gotta go, there’s...I just...I gotta go.” Beau mutters and stumbles away.
Shit. I didn’t think. That must have been hard as hell with me spewin’ it out like that. His girlfriend died that night and here I am complaining Claudette’s back, alive and well.
I’m such a fucking idiot. I rush into the store and grab enough groceries to keep me locked inside the house for weeks. Best to keep to myself right now.
Chapter 04
***Laudy***
It’s been over two weeks since I came back, and I’ve seen Zeke two times. Now I’m about to do it again and hope that the third times a charm. I don’t know why I let Earle talk me into this. Well, I do. He used a pouty face, telling me he’s been a good boy and washed behind his ears and all. I chuckle at the thought. Earle has always been nice to me.
He’s still saying that Zeke will turn around and that I would have my chance to talk to him about all of it once he’s calmed down. Yet, I have my doubts. Zeke always was a guy who focused on something, good or bad, and pinned the thought to map out every detail. His mind would work overtime, a hard mindset until he gave it an indefinite place inside his head. And now, he’s not the guy I knew all those years ago. Clearly, he’s become a different man, still that hard head, yet different.
Not only by appearances, rugged as if the years have been harder on him, adding the gray hairs and lines in his face, giving him an older look. All that muscle, tattoos, and yet when I look at him I still feel the way I did when I left. I guess some things don’t change because I left for him...I couldn’t stand losing Zeke how I lost my whole family. Leaving was indeed the best, and only option I had been given.
“You want a beer?” Earle holds out a bottle for me.
I should leave, though their family welcomed me mere minutes ago with open arms. And that’s just it...Zeke’s whole family is here. Well, everyone except for Roscoe. The man I would like to throat punch, that’s for sure.
“Thanks.” I mutter and grab the bottle when I see Zeke strolling into the back yard.
Judging by the look on his face I really do need a beer, more than one, most likely. Either that or I need to disappear on the spot or somehow leave without being seen. Shit. So much for that because he’s stalking right toward us.
“Why’s she here, Earle?” Zeke rumbles without acknowledging me.
I release a deep sigh, deciding I might as well be the bitch he thinks I am. “Earle, give us a moment, please.”
Earle nods while he glares at Zeke before he stalks away.
“Listen, I didn’t come here to fight with you or beg for your forgiveness or anything. I came because Earle asked me to and I haven’t been anywhere except for Roscoe’s house and the gift shop. Even the gift shop was only two times, so...”
“Are you seeing Earle now? That’s how it is?” The vein on the side of his head is ready to blow while his eyes are filled with fury.
Tightening my hand into a fist, I punch his shoulder. I get ready to punch him again when he grabs my waist and spins us around, my back hitting the tree. Zeke hisses and drags me to the ground the next instant.
The turmoil of shouting, Zeke standing up, glancing around while he orders me to stay down confuses the hell out of me. All Zeke’s family members storm into the house and come out the next minute armored with shotguns and start to disappear into the trees that surround the house.
Zeke is rooted to the ground until his eyes find mine. “You okay?”
My eyes bounce from the tree lines back to him until I notice his shoulder that’s starting to turn red. “You’re bleeding!” I gasp and flash up.
Zeke curls his arm around my waist and turns me toward the house. “Come on, we need to get inside.”
“Inside? But you’re hurt...why...what, what’s happening?” I ask in confusion.
Zeke doesn’t stop until we’re standing in a bedroom inside the house, surrounded by the protection of walls. “I took a hit in the shoulder, and if my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me...I just saw my fucking brother chasing someone through the woods.”
“Someone shot you? Oh, God...it wasn’t safe for me to return...but why would your brother say it was? I never would have returned if...oh, shit.” The blood in my veins turns cold. This is why I stayed away for almost sixteen years. “I need to go. Now. Let go, Zeke. I need to get away from you.” I plead.
Zeke’s fingers tighten on my upper arms. “What brother of mine said it was? The same fucking brother I just thought I saw? The one who none of us have seen in years? What the fuck is going on, Claudette?”
“You’re hurting me,” I whimper at the way he’s still gripping me.
Zeke’s chest is rapidly rising and falling, his eyes hold so many emotions and I’m sure they mirror mine. I wish we were back to the point in time where there was still an us. Where the man standing before me was the guy who had faith in me, trusted me like I trusted him. I now realize that I did lose him that night. Losing a loved one is unbearable, yet this feels the same and somehow repeats the hurt over and over.
“Claudette,” Zeke snaps.
I whimper from the pain in my upper arms before I steel myself and tug free from his hard grip.
“No more!” I scream and step back to point a finger in his face. “It was your brother who told me to run and hide because he couldn’t get me into witness protection, or protective custody, what the hell ever, but I needed to stay away from you. And it was your brother who wrote me a letter with a plane ticket asking me to return home. That it was safe, that you needed me, that...” my voice breaks as I’m unable to keep the rest to myself. “That I finally had the chance to tell you how I felt about you. But it’s gone. He lied. All these years and look! You’re bleeding! He could have killed you! I can’t...I need to go. This time I won’t come back, Zeke. And that’s what you wanted these last few weeks right? Wishing I never came back? Well...you got it.” I furiously wipe the tears away that have silently and unwillingly fallen before I add. “I’m sorry. About everything. I never wished for any of this to happen.”
I try to step around him but he blocks me. “Now wait just a goddamned minute. Give me a name, Claudette. Or better yet, give me two. Who the hell took a shot at you and what fucking brother of mine? Never mind, I can guess that one, Roscoe, right?”
“I don’t know who! That’s just it. The person who’s responsible for killing my family...I never saw him. Roscoe said that night that the perp was going to go after me. I was supposed to be home too, but I was late. We fell asleep on your couch and I was almost an hour past my curfew. Roscoe said I would get you and him killed too if I stayed. Rambling about how we lived in a little town, that there was no chance, I could easily die. And that you would never let me go...so he gave me money to get on a plane. I...I didn’t want to leave, I didn’t want you hurt...I had no one. I trusted him...I saw the truth in his eyes and with what just happened...with what I saw...I had no other choice.” I swallow back the emotions that should have died inside me along with everything else on that day.
I was broken and numb. Then and now; all of this is bringing back waves of memories and emotions I had tried to bury deep. The only thing that I haven’t told him...dammit, I might as well. “I didn’t choose for myself to live that night. I chose you. And look at the blood, Zeke. Look. All I ever do is cause you pain. How we worked so well in the past, you were right, we might have had something once, but whatever it was...”
I can’t even finish that sentence. For the second time I try to pass him but Zeke grabs my shoulders and spins me around, my back hitting the door as he cages me in with his body.
“Fucking look where I’m hit, Claudette. See how that’s eye level for you? Because that bullet was meant to hit you right in the fucking head. Don’t tell me it’s me they’re after, or that I’m at risk. Fuck that. My brother might have been right but that was not his decision to make. And I will for damn sure tell him myself when I get my hands on him.”
Voices ring out in another part of the house. Zeke steps back and guides me away from the door. He laces his fingers with mine as he leaves me no other choice but to follow him into the living room.
Zeke’s mother, Jo, is standing with a shotgun in her hand. “Nothin’. Looks like we chased an effin’ ghost.”
Zeke’s father, Billy Bob, takes his shotgun and Jo’s to set on the large table. “Make that two ghosts, ‘cause for darn sure there were two sets of footprints out there.”
“Any of you catch up with Roscoe?” Zeke’s question makes the room fall silent.
Everyone stares at Zeke until Billy Bob shakes his head. “You sure that bullet didn’t nick your head instead of your arm there, son? Roscoe hasn’t been home in years. If that boy was running outside he would be wavin’ his hand at your ma first before chasing down another man. He’s not that rude, we raised him ourselves.”
“You’re goin’ loony. Roscoe wasn’t here, he’s out of state.” Cyrus says as he locks away the shotguns.
“I need to get going.” I say and all eyes are now fixed on me. While I try like hell to tug my hand from Zeke’s grip. “Let go, Zeke, I need to leave.”
“You’re not going anywhere.” There’s a promise in his voice that’s as tight as his grip on my hand. “You’ve tried the running element for over sixteen effin’ years, now it’s time you let us handle this.”
“Us?” I squeak. “You can’t do that! Roscoe made me promise not to go to the sheriff here, or anywhere else for that matter.”
Gasps come from all around the room. Dammit, how come Roscoe reached out to me a few weeks ago, stepped up for me all those years ago, and yet hasn’t said anything to any of them? It makes no freaking sense at all.
Jo walks up to me and takes my other hand, leading me to the couch. “Sit down, sweetie and let’s talk because I’m sure no one here understands what’s going on. It will allow us to all chip in and see if we can figure this out.” She glares at Zeke. “You can let go now, I’m pretty sure we all can outrun her, boy.”
A twinge of warmth hits my chest when I see the look on Zeke’s face. He really doesn’t want to let go of my hand and is clearly debating going up against his ma. But I know, as well as he does, that that’s something none of her kids have ever done. She might be old and gray, but she’s always been fierce. Like how she went into the woods just now with the rest of them, shotgun in hand.
Zeke lets go of my hand but sits down next to me on the couch so close, he might be trying to glue us together. Jo shakes her head at him but doesn’t say anything. The rest of Zeke’s brothers, and Billy Bob, gather around while the women stay with the children in the background.
“Dammit...there are kids here, I can’t put them all at risk, you guys need to let me go.” I plead, yet again.
“Yeah, not happening. We’ll be taking you somewhere safe in a moment, no worries, but we’re going to have a little chat first.” Dale winks.
Shit. Seems like I have no choice, and yet this is the first time in years someone is standing up for me. It’s suffocating not to have the ability to run, not talk about it, and handle everything myself...while on the other hand...concern is written on all of these people’s faces.
People I’ve known all my life. People I grew up with. People my parents loved. I bury my face in my hands while sobs and tears escape.
Chapter 05
***Zeke***
“Oh, for effin’ sake.” I grumble and pull her on my lap.
I have a sobbing woman in my arms that feels so damn right. Well, except for the tears of course.
“Could you guys give us some room?” I glare at my p
arents and siblings, all crowding around.
I know they want to help out but right now we’re suffocating her, putting her on the spot like that. With what just happened and from the shit I’ve heard coming from her, I’m sure it’s a whole whirlwind right now where she doesn’t even know top from bottom. All of it having to do with her family being murdered, and how is my brother wrapped up in this?
“All right, y’all. Let’s get things settled outside first. Chester, go check on the burgers, I reckon they’re burned to crisp. The rest of you...go clean up, dinner will have to wait.” My dad tells everyone as my mom shoos them out of the room.
Silence surrounds us as I gently stoke a hand down her soft, chestnut hair. The sobbing has stopped but the way her body still shakes against mine, I know the emotions and tears are far from gone. I slide my fingers underneath her chin and tip it slightly back.
“Aw, dammit.” I croak before taking off her glasses and placing them next to me on the couch.
Her tearstained face is slicing the pain she feels straight through my own heart.
“You’ve got to let me go, Zeke. When I went into the house sixteen years ago my brother ran up to me, pushing me out, whispering to me Geraldine and our parents were dead and that the killer was still in the house. He was about to say something else when someone from behind him shoved a knife through his throat and sliding it out over and over. The knife kept plunging into his body. I screamed so loud...his eyes. There was so much blood. I ran out of the house but smacked right into Roscoe’s chest. I yelled for him to let me go. I needed to get away, that the killer was in the house. He put me in the backseat of his patrol car, Zeke. I couldn’t get out...I saw Roscoe enter the house and sometime later, I saw a man ran out the back, disappearing into the woods. Roscoe came back with a cut on his arm. He shoved a metal box in my hands, the one my father kept our papers in along with a few personal items, and said that I needed to run. He urged me on that I couldn’t go over his head and tell the sheriff about any of this. I have no clue why but he just said it wasn’t safe for anyone...not for me, not for you. I believed him, Zeke. He’s never lied to me, and the look on his face...I was so scared and in shock, I didn’t know what to do. I lost everything that night and I don’t know what happened when he went back into the house, or why, but I believed him...like how I believed it when I got his letter a few weeks ago. It was strange how he found me,” Her eyes bounce around as if she’s searching her mind until her gaze snaps back to me. “I was arrested weeks ago...does that go on file? Can he track something like that? Is that how he found me?”
Cross Ties (Swamp Heads, #5) Page 3