To Night Owl From Dogfish

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To Night Owl From Dogfish Page 3

by Holly Goldberg Sloan


  I pack this way too because he’s taught me that it’s the most efficient way.

  Question: Does your dad organize first in piles?

  Avery

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  No. We don’t pile pack.

  We’re last minute people.

  Very random: Do you or don’t you wear lip gloss?

  Bett

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I have a lot of different kinds of lip gloss and ChapStick and lip balms which I keep in a zippered pouch that I bought at a Saturday outdoor market here in New York City, and which has little lips all over it. Most of my lip gloss is medicated because I’m susceptible to lip licker’s dermatitis. (I don’t know if you’ve heard of that, but it’s a real thing.)

  Where do you stand on lip gloss?

  Avery Bloom

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I’m still figuring out lip gloss.

  Another random question: Have you got your period yet? My friends Summer + Angel wanted me to ask you. They don’t know you (+ never will) but they are curious.

  Bett

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  That’s a very personal question. But the answer is yes. I was ten years and eight months old (which is on the young side) when it happened. Even though we had watched a movie (animated) in school about the changing body, I didn’t realize that was what was going on. I thought I was dying of a blood disease.

  We were in Sagaponack, which is in the Hamptons, and we were about to go to the beach, and I was getting changed (not into a swimsuit because I wasn’t going to swim, but into different shorts) when suddenly: blood.

  I almost fainted.

  People say that and don’t mean it, but I have actually fainted before. Three times. What’s really going on is that I have a sudden drop in blood pressure and lose consciousness. I’ve had all the tests necessary to make sure I’m fainting for emotional reasons and not from a brain tumor, like Mr. Harrison our (former) mailman.

  So I saw the blood and thought I was going to faint, but I didn’t. I started to cry (I cry pretty easily, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, because it helps you “unbottle” your emotions). My dad saw me run down the hall. He heard the door slam when I locked myself in the bathroom. He came over and he was on one side of the door and I was on the other. I sent him a text message: “Papa, I’m bleeding to death.”

  He said, “Honey, what? Where is there blood?”

  I said, “In a privacy zone.” Then I added, just to make sure he understood, “Between my legs.”

  He was really great because right away he figured it out. But we didn’t have any “supplies,” if you get my meaning.

  There is a general store in Sagaponack run by this elderly guy people call Old Gus, who has a big jar of horehound candy for sale on the counter, which children used to eat in the nineteenth century. It tastes like boots. Not that I have eaten boots, but as a future author I can imagine what they would taste like. I stayed home and Dad had to ask Old Gus, “Do you have sanitary napkins?”

  The guy didn’t hear well and thought he just wanted regular napkins, and gave him those.

  By then a line started to form of weekend people wanting to buy things like rosemary crackers & goat cheese. Dad had to ask again about the sanitary napkins. Old Gus shouted, “Oh, you mean you want pads! Feminine hygiene pads!”

  Dad said it was awkward. Ever since then, whenever we go to the general store I stay in the car.

  Did you get your period yet?

  One of my piles of camp stuff is labeled “personal hygiene supplies.”

  Avery

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I haven’t had my period yet.

  The longer it takes to get here the BETTER. I sometimes look at big groups of people + I think: I wonder how many of the women out there are bleeding. It’s not that great of a thought.

  Also, I surf + getting my period means that I’ll have more shark risk. You don’t read about that in surf magazines. Or maybe you do. I buy the magazines for the cool pictures. I cut a lot of them out for my wall.

  My dad said that you + your dad are vegetarians. Me + my dad are big meat-eaters. I LOVE animals, but I eat meat because those animals would not be alive at all WITHOUT A FARM that was raising them to take to market. So you aren’t saving an animal by not eating meat. You are keeping one from being born.

  If you think about it then it makes more sense, but a lot of people don’t do this.

  My favorite meat is bacon.

  Bett

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I feel like I should tell you that people who eat bacon have a much greater chance of getting cancer than people who don’t, because the nitrates are really bad for you.

  Also, bacon can clog your arteries. Not now, but a long time from now, way after you’ve eaten the bacon and thought it was so delicious.

  Avery

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  Don’t worry about me eating bacon, because doctors will have figured out how to fix any bacon problem by the time we are old.

  Me + Dad go to a clinic when we’re sick. I like Dr. Nguyen. He once flew Air Force airplanes. He has a bowl of fun-size candy bars right on his desk that’s for everyone.

  I don’t know why they try to sell smaller candy bars as being more fun than the bigger ones. That’s just a lie.

  Bett

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I leave on Thursday for CIGI. I’m flying by myself. I’m very nervous about the plane. We aren’t flying over water, but what if we crash-land? Which would be worse: smashing into the ground or hitting a body of water? The water is also a very hard landing, and if you survive you can then die from drowning. One would probably be instant death, and the other could take a little longer. I’m getting a headache from the choice.

  My dad will really regret sending me to camp if either thing happens to me.

  I’m all packed. Are you all packed?

  Avery

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re:
re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  I haven’t even started packing. I know they sent that big list with what to bring but I threw it away. I looked at it real quick before I put it in the garbage, which was enough to know I wasn’t going to bring one “personal attachment item” like a teddy bear, which is the example they gave. Talk about baby time.

  My personal attachment item would be one of my dogs + that wouldn’t work. Are you bringing something? If some of the girls show up with their old ratty blankets I’m going to just fall over.

  All I know that I’m FOR SURE BRINGING is my iPad. (My whole school got them, donated.) It says they “strongly discourage personal technology” (isn’t it partly a science + technology camp?) but I told my dad that I’m NOT LEAVING HERE WITHOUT MY iPAD. So I think he is going to ask for a technology waiver.

  If you have one, you should bring it. We may need to communicate. But we both agree that we will NOT SPEAK TO EACH OTHER AT CAMP. So not that kind of communicating.

  I’ll be wearing a skirt + an orange T-shirt in case you have trouble figuring out who I am. Orange is my favorite color.

  Bett

  P.S. I just checked my dad’s email account before I pressed send. (He’s out of the house.) I have a SUPER-BIG NEWS FLASH! I think you should sit down before you read it, because of your fainting problem:

  MY DAD + YOUR DAD ARE GOING TO CHINA TOGETHER WHILE WE ARE AT CAMP!

  That’s right, CHINA. They will be traveling for 8 WEEKS, IN A FOREIGN COUNTRY + PROBABLY TOTALLY OUT OF REACH IF WE HAVE AN EMERGENCY.

  I hope you didn’t feel too dizzy reading that.

  Bett

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  China? Really?! I’m having trouble breathing, and I just used my inhaler and it’s not working. Uncontrolled emotions can constrict the smooth muscles of the lungs and cause chest tightness. It’s called nervous asthma. It’s happened to me before and it’s happening to me right now.

  I really try not to use my inhaler because you can get dependent on them, and that can lead to a bad situation.

  When I get very upset (like right now) I go to one of my books. I’m always reading several at the same time. They are all over the apartment, but with bookmarks to hold my place, not open facedown, because that breaks their spines. This is how much the news has upset me: I can’t even concentrate enough to read.

  Our fathers are going to China and we’re being sent to a sleepaway camp and our lives are spinning out of control.

  A

  * * *

  Hello, Avery! Hello, Bett! (In alphabetical order!)

  WELCOME TO CAMP! We each hid a copy of this same note in your bags. We have no idea if CIGI is the most awesome program out there, but we figured it would have enough outdoor stuff for Bett, and enough indoor stuff for Avery.

  We want you to get to know each other without us around to interfere, because we think this is the start of a friendship that will last for a long, long time.

  As in forever.

  So have fun, you guys. Find fossils. Study robotics. Open your hearts. Go in new directions. And in 8 weeks maybe we’ll be on our way to having 2 families of 2 become 1 family of 4. Or, as they might put it in the Rockin’ the Numbers class at CIGI: (2x2)=4 or (-2)2= (-2) x (-2) = 4

  We love you so much,

  Papa + Dad

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  A—

  Good thing we both got the technology waiver. Even though we agreed that it makes sense NOT TO TALK TO EACH OTHER AT ALL, there’s still stuff to say, now that we’re here.

  I was thinking you would beat me to CIGI, but Daniel the Camp Director explained that people who come from the farthest away are always earlier than the people who are close by. New York is closer than Los Angeles.

  Plus it wasn’t your fault there was a thunderstorm + your plane got delayed.

  You didn’t miss ANYTHING. All that happened was hearing boring rules (I didn’t listen because it was the same stuff that was in the packet + who would bring a knife or fireworks to camp?).

  I unpacked + found the dad note. I got so mad at the words, “As in forever.”

  Whenever I complain about something, my dad always says “Bett, nothing lasts forever,” so that line came from your dad, not mine. But I really think the WHOLE thing sounded like your dad since my dad DOESN’T EVER WRITE ME LETTERS.

  I’m not saying your dad is more into this than mine. I think they are into it the same amount, which is how we got to be here digging up fossils. I bet the camp hides them ahead of time because I saw that on the TV show Copter Crew: Among the Missing, where the team took dogs to a landslide area. They had to hide real dead bodies for the three beagles or they’d lose interest. At a place like CIGI they probably go bury a bunch of fossils, because otherwise we’d stop looking.

  Anyway, while we’re here fake-fossil hunting, THE DADS HAVE THEIR OWN PLAN. They admitted that they were going to China. But I didn’t know it was to RIDE MOTORCYCLES. I found that out at the airport.

  THIS IS JUST LIKE MY DAD. He gets an idea about stuff + then he just goes + does it. Remind me to write you about the hot-air balloon ride we were taking in New Mexico when it started snowing.

  Did YOU know about the MOTORCYCLES + not tell me? Is your papa a big rider? If he’s like you, I sort of doubt it.

  My dad can do A LOT of stuff, like drive a forklift + parasail + Jet Ski + snowboard + he once owned a hang glider. For a long time he’s said that he wanted to go on a real motorcycle adventure + it was going to be with ME when I’m older. That was OUR PLAN. So this is really wrong.

  Write me back. It looks like I’m sleeping but I’m not because of the time change + because of the motorcycle trip that is happening without me.

  Bett

  P.S. Tomorrow we pick animals to take care of. I’m going to ask for the PIGS. I heard the WORST choice is the chickens because they don’t bond.

  * * *

  From: Avery Bloom

  To: Bett Devlin

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  B—

  It’s 3:02 a.m. You’re asleep. I asked our counselor, Rachel, to show me where you are. She pointed to a lump, but your head is completely under the blanket. Naturally, I was worried that you’re going to suffocate. But Rachel whispered, “Oh, Bett Devlin does everything her own way.”

  So, you’ve been here for only ten hours and our counselor already thinks of you as some sort of impressive rebel. That would never happen to me.

  I’m trying to sleep but I have travel nerves. Added to that I have Papa’s safety to worry about. Motorcycles are dangerous. Everyone knows that. We had a neighbor who was a neurologist! And he was a real talker. Papa is such a hypocrite. Whenever we travel he is all about our personal safety, which probably means that my worries are in my DNA.

  Being in love has changed him.

  A

  P.S. I already decided that I’m going to pick a chicken for my animal, despite what you said. I feel that they are underrated because of having very small brains. I have a plan that maybe I can bulk up my chicken’s IQ using parrot-training techniques. I could then write about it for the National Young Writers’ Contest, which is in September. I hope to enter in three different catego
ries.

  I’ll see you tomorrow, but of course I won’t talk to you. There are lots of people here, so we’ll each make our own friends. If we find ourselves standing around in the same group of people, one of us can just sort of wander off and be interested in plants.

  * * *

  From: Bett Devlin

  To: Avery Bloom

  Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: you don’t know me

  A—

  Just so you know, I did not ask to be moved out of Petunia Pod.

  They just randomly picked me. What happened is a girl named Stella came today, LATE, because she had a sprained ankle until maybe a day ago. She’s cousins with the super-annoying Dyllan. (That’s how it’s spelled. Two l’s. It’s all over her luggage.) She cried because they were supposed to be together + instead she got put in Peace Lily Pod.

  I don’t want to be mean about it, but crying seems like a bad reaction for a 12-year-old who didn’t get the pod she wanted. Also, why are the pods named after flowers? I wish they were animals. I guess this means that’ll be another T-shirt I can rip up + put into the rag box.

  I didn’t really unpack so it wasn’t hard to move my stuff when I was picked to go. Anyway, now we will see each other ONLY AT GROUP EVENTS since so many things are done in pods. Everyone says people don’t make friends with kids not in their group + we aren’t talking anyway, so we really wrecked our dads’ plan.

  We can WRITE TO EACH OTHER ON OUR iPADS, but I think only if we have news to share about our dads.

  Don’t tell your dad + I won’t tell my dad about the pod move. They are on a thousand-hour plane ride to China right now + have probably forgotten about us anyway. I’m not going to write to my dad. This will be a way of punishing him.

 

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