I felt my loins begin to throb as I kissed her long and deep on my doorstep. The idea of two weeks without sex was a real killer for me. I can't remember the last time I'd gone that long without feeling the warmth of a woman's thighs. Probably not since my late teens.
She clearly didn't have sex in mind anyway. Even if I'd been raring to go, I don't think she'd have reciprocated my advances. In fact, she'd become more and more sexually closed off over the last few months. I guess the honeymoon period that I'd heard people rattle on about was a real thing. I always thought it was bullshit. If I had it my way we'd have been screwing every night.
She turned off down the hall and walked away from me with a promise that she'd be there, ringside, in two weeks time. I watched the curve of her ass closely as she walked away. It was the last time I'd see it in a while.
I turned back into my apartment and closed the door. Now I needed to set my mind to the one goal currently dominating my thoughts.
Agulla. The fight. I had to win. There was nothing else now.
Chapter 10 - Gemma
Present Day
Gemma
I sat in the bright sunshine nursing a cappuccino. Annie sat opposite me, her red hair tied up into an impressive bun. She wore an outfit that I would never dream of considering, a multi-colored striped dress and red tights that made her look like she'd just been thrown out of Santa's grotto.
As a fashion journalist she often came into work wearing clothing that you'd only ever see on the catwalk, and seemed oblivious to the added attention it gave her whenever she was in public.
Now was one of those times, with people staring over at us as they walked past. How I noticed just about every glance, and she didn't seem to see any, I would never work out. I suppose over her lifetime she'd grown accustomed to it all. It was all new to me.
Of course, some of the stares might have been directed at me. People now knew that I was Cade Logan's girlfriend and I was beginning to notice people looking in my direction more than I ever had. It was disconcerting and something I really wasn't comfortable with.
It had been a few days since I'd last seen Cade now. We'd had some sort of farewell dinner over at his, to which he seemed to have put a good deal of effort into. The food was great, but the conversation and mood not so much. To be fair, that was more to do with me than anything else.
I had been battling with this whole thing with Cade for a week now, and hadn't shared it with anyone. Mrs Banks was adamant that I dig into his past and find some sort of skeleton that we could put to print. OK, so it could be printed under another name, moving the spotlight away from me, but still, how could I possibly do that to him?
She told me that anything I could find was bound to come out at some point, and that he'd have to get used to people prying into his business. If he was to climb to the top of the tree, he was always going to find himself exposed to the shitstorm coming his way. So many celebrities and well known people lived under the spotlight, and that's exactly where Cade was headed.
Mrs Banks had a way with words, a way of trying to convince me to do what she wanted. I'd never visited her office so much as I had over the last week or two, this story clearly front and center of her mind. Quite why she was so interested was beyond me.
But, whatever her motives, I was being put into an impossible position, and it was eating away at me. I'd either have to find some dirt on Cade and his family or I'd lose out on the promotion that would see my career begin to soar.
Worse than that, however, was that Mrs Banks had made it clear that I wasn't only going to miss out on the promotion, but that I'd lose my job. She never said it in so many words, but she'd suggested, on more than one occasion, that my job would be at risk, alongside my prospects of finding work elsewhere.
The weight of it all had become suffocating when I'd had dinner with Cade that night. He'd been quite sweet, putting that effort in, and had grown uncomfortable when he told me that we couldn't see each other for a while and that the interview he'd said he'd do for me was no longer possible.
I mean, I might have been perhaps a little angry with him if that interview was still on the cards, but Mrs Banks had made it clear that a simple story about his career so far was not what our readers were looking for. No, she wanted drama, she wanted scandal, and nothing else would be good enough.
It was actually a relief when Cade told me he couldn't give me an exclusive. It would help me stay completely away from the blame if I did choose to bow to Mrs Banks' demands. Whether I would was dominating my thoughts, making me lose sleep as well as my appetite.
I needed someone to talk to, and she was sitting in front of me right now.
….
“Jesus Christ, that's a tricky one honey. You really are caught between a rock and a hard place right there,” Annie had said when I'd first told her.
“Tell me about it. What do you think I should do?”
Annie was a good ten years older than me and had been around the block a few times. She had a good ear for listening, and a good tongue for advice. I really needed some right now.
She thought for a moment, processing everything I'd told her, before speaking again.
“OK, first thing you need to ask yourself is this – how much do you care about Cade?”
“Um, I dunno, quite a lot most of the time.”
“And the rest?”
“Well he can be a dick sometimes, but so can any guy. Most of the time we have a lot of fun together.”
“OK, so what we're asking here is whether you're willing to betray him.”
“Well, no, not really. I mean, I don't love him or anything. I don't think I do anyway. But even if I didn't like him much at all, I couldn't do that. I couldn't do that to anyone, it's not me.”
She smiled consolingly. “I feared that's what you'd say.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, Gem, you're one of the nicest girls I've ever met, and certainly the nicest I've worked with. To be a journalist you've gotta be pretty ruthless sometimes. Now, don't take this the wrong way, but I don't know if you have that side to you.”
“So you don't think I've got what it takes?”
She hesitated a touch. “Well I wouldn't say that, no. I'd just say that you've got to be willing to go to your dark side, you know, step out of your comfort zone.”
“So, screw over my boyfriend to better my career? Are you serious?!” My voice was entirely indignant.
“No, that's not what I'm saying at all. I'm just speaking more generally. This case is obviously different because it's personal.”
“Hell yeah it's personal Annie. He's my boyfriend for fuck's sake, I can't screw him like this.”
Annie was nodding. “Well it looks like you've already made up your mind then.”
I could feel my blood beginning to boil a little bit. Why the hell was Banks putting me in this position. She was such a manipulative bitch. Maybe I'd be better off out of this fucking industry.
But no, I'd wanted to be a journalist all my life. It was my dream, always had been, and I couldn't give up on it so easily.
“Look Gem, I know how important this job is to you, so how about this. Find a story that won't affect Cade, you know, something he won't care about. You know him, just find something that won't be a big deal to him, but that Banks will love. Cade might be a bit pissed that something's come out about him, but he won't suspect you. Trust me, if he's going to become a bigger star then he's going to have to get used to people snooping into his private life.”
“Yeah, that's what Banks has been telling me.”
“Well she's right there. Cade might hate it at first, but he'll get used to it. Everyone in the public eye is in the same boat honey, so you won't really be doing much wrong.”
“OK, so what do you think I'll find? What sort of story could I possibly write that he won't hate me for.”
“Honey, he won't find out.”
“OK, that I won't hate myself for then? I can't do
that to someone I care about Annie. Put yourself in my shoes, could you?”
“Gem, Cade's gonna come in for all sort of shit if things go well in the ring. It's a symptom of fame. If you don't do it, someone else will, and they won't be as merciful as you. You might be doing him a favor at the end of the day.”
“Somehow I doubt it.”
“Well what's the alternative honey? Lose the promotion, lose your job? Then what? Your dream will be stuck in the mud. Martha Banks has a lot of sway and can easily stop you finding work elsewhere if she really wants. I've worked for her for years, and when she sets her sights on something she can be a ruthless and callous witch. Look, all I'm saying is have a snoop around, it can't hurt to look.”
Jesus, she was making it sound like everyone had skeletons in their closets, with easy evidence just lying around to reveal them.
“OK, so say I do have a 'snoop', as you put it. How exactly should I go about doing that? Not everyone has secrets they are trying to hide, Annie, and even if they do, why would they have any evidence of it?”
“Well that's why you've gotta start digging girl. There's no harm in having a look. Computer files are a good place to start, or any paper files and letters he might have in his apartment. Do you have a key?”
I nodded, not liking where she was going with this.
“Then go take a look while he's out training. Just take a look and see what you can find. If you find nothing then you can at least tell Mrs Banks that you've tried. If you do find something you can use, you can go from there. Babe, this is what it's all about, you've either gotta sink or swim here.”
Annie was showing me her own ruthless edge, something I'd never previously noticed. I guess after so many years under the employ of Martha Banks a few things would begin to wear off.
“Oh, and you know who else is going after your promotion, don't you?” she continued, leaning closer towards me across our table.
I shook my head, but I could guess.
“Tara Bradley.”
“Yeah, that doesn't surprise me at all.”
Tara Bradley was one of the biggest kiss-asses I'd ever known and I knew she'd do whatever it took to get ahead. If she was in my position she'd happily sacrifice everything to get the best story she could.
“Well, she may be an insufferable bitch but she's going places. She'd sell her own mother to get a good story.”
“Yeah, well, I'm not sure that's something to be emulated or admired.”
“No, but you need to know what you're up against. Banks clearly wants something on Cade and the Logan boys but you can be sure that Tara is going to come up with something pretty juicy as well.”
Now that did add an extra dimension to this whole fucking mess. The last thing I wanted was that sneaky little bitch creeping ahead of me.
Fuck it, maybe I should just take a look. What could be the harm?
“All right,” I said, “I'll take a look in Cade's apartment. I mean, what's the worst that can happen, really?”
“Good girl. That's the spirit.”
I sat back and looked up at the bright sky, the sun beating down onto my uncovered shoulders. I could see Cade's apartment in my head, silent and empty. He'd probably be down at the boxing club now, sparring and preparing for the biggest fight of his life.
He'd never suspect I'd been there, I wouldn't leave a trace. All I needed to do was walk through the door. It was the easiest thing in the world, and no one would ever know.
I just needed to find out exactly when he'd be out, and I knew just where to go to find the answer.
Chapter 11 - Zack
Present Day
Zack
My office had begun to grow more and more cluttered and messy over the last few months. I used to be so clean and tidy, taking pride in the club that I ran, but now those feelings had grown numb.
Nightshapes was one of the most popular dance clubs in town, although our figures had been waning in recent months. Frankly, I didn't care, and felt myself lucky that Crash was so preoccupied with other business concerns to notice.
Since dad died he'd become the head of the family and was responsible for overseeing all of our businesses and assets, yet recently he'd been so consumed by his new hotel and casino project that the club had fallen off his radar.
For me, the fun I used to have running it and the enthusiasm I had for the job had begun to fade. I used to feel proud in my role, like I was some sort of big fish in town, someone to be looked up to, someone who was running a top club at so young an age.
Yet it was all false, and I knew that now. I hadn't achieved anything myself. It was all handed down from my father, and I had nothing to be proud of. Cade, though, could be proud of what he was doing, and a deep feeling of envy and jealousy towards him had begun to invade every cell of my body.
He was the new local hero in town, capable of bedding any girl he wanted. But no, the girl he wanted was Gemma, and that pissed me off more than anything. The irony of it all was that he had no idea I knew her, no idea I harbored these sorts of feelings. If he did, I wonder what he'd do?
I took a drink of whiskey from the cabinet next to my desk and snuffed out my cigarette. I knew I wasn't meant to smoke in here but I didn't care anymore. It was another part of my life that had been getting worse recently, and now I was up to a pack a day.
It was a Tuesday night and that meant one thing – student night. We'd brought it in recently to try to get our numbers back up on what was traditionally a pretty slow evening. Now that word was beginning to spread, however, it had become our most popular night of the week outside of Friday and Saturday.
I'd see Kyle come down sometimes. Ever since he'd started dating Alice he would tag along to some of their student evenings. I knew she was underage, along with her friends, but I still let them in. Frankly, most of the students coming down here probably were too. As long as it kept our profits up, it didn't bother me.
The thud of the club and the relentless sound of chatter and shouting girls invaded my ears as I sat there. It was distant, but endless, and the night was just getting started.
Another 6 hours of this shit. I was growing sick of it.
I reached for a set of earphones and stuck them as deep as possible into my ears, putting on some relaxing chillout music to calm my aching head. I lay back and shut my eyes, the noise of the hectic world around me beginning to fade away.
Peace at last. Fucking bliss.
But, of course, it didn't last long.
A mere 20 minutes into my personal chillout session I felt a large hand shake lightly at my shoulder. I slowly opened my eyes to see Brick, my head bouncer, looming over me. He was a monster of a man, but had this hangdog expression on his face. I guess the way my mood had turned recently, I couldn't blame him, especially since I'd fired another guy just the week before for no good reason.
I could see his mouth moving but had no idea what he was saying. I mean, clearly I can't hear you Brick with these fucking earphones in.
I casually leaned back up and pulled the wires from my ears.
“Brick, do you see these funny looking things in my ears? It means I can't hear you.”
“Err, sorry Mr Logan.”
“Now what's going on?” I asked, semi-irritated to have been disturbed. “This better be good.”
“Yes, sorry Mr Logan, but there's a girl here, says she's a friend.”
“A girl? Do you have a name?”
“Um, yes, it's Bella, I think.”
“Bella? I don't know any Bella. Tell her I'm busy.” Just another girl looking for Cade Logan's twin brother probably.
“Um, yes Mr Logan. I might be wrong, though, about the name. She said she's dating your brother Cade.”
I sat up straighter. “Gemma?”
“Oh yes, sorry boss, that's it. I'm sorry for the mix up.”
Jesus, he was acting timid. Had I really become such a dick recently?
“That's all right Brick. Send her in here.”
&n
bsp; Brick nodded his head down obediently and turned towards the door. The boom of the bass and the chatter of drunken students immediately grew louder as the door widened, before being shut off once more as he stepped into the corridor beyond and shut the door behind him.
I glanced quickly around the room and cursed myself for leaving it in such a state. I grabbed a mirror from my desk and checked out my hair, swiping it back and neatening it up a bit. I could feel my heart-rate beginning to rise at the thought of seeing her again. I wish that didn't happen. I wish I didn't have these fucking feelings for her. I wish we could just be friends like we once were. But no, things had changed now, and there was no going back in my head.
The last time I'd spent any time alone with her was 3 months ago at my birthday. It was that night when my feelings for her were fully reignited and ever since then things had been extremely awkward whenever I saw her and Cade together.
I even felt awkward when he spoke to me about her, something he'd done recently, asking for advice on how to deal with an argument they'd had. My heart had sunk when he'd told me he was serious about her, and I felt myself being torn between the love for my brother and my growing feelings for her.
I could see, as any fool could, that my own personal downward trajectory had coincided with Gemma's reappearance in my life. The irony wasn't lost on me: that this girl who I cared for deeply could have so negative an effect on me.
But it was a problem I had to deal with, and deal with alone.
The door opened ahead of me and the noise of the club spilled once again into the room. Gemma's face appeared, wearing a wide smile.
She stepped in and closed the door behind her, taking a quick look around and sniffing the air.
“You still smoking then Zack,” she said with half judgement and half concern. “Those things will kill you, you know.”
I smiled. “So could lots of things. Live fast, die young, right.”
She laughed and walked around the side of my desk, coming close towards me. My pulse continued to jump.
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