by C. M. Albert
I’d just decided I had time for a catnap when I slammed into a man rounding the corner, his arms full of fresh flowers. He dropped them to the floor to steady me, his hand clasping my upper arm.
“Are you okay?” he asked at the exact moment I yelled, “Hey! Watch where you’re going!”
I took a step back and rubbed my upper chest where our bodies had collided. It was then that I realized his arms hadn’t been full of flowers, just one arm had—because he was missing the other one. “Oh,” I said, feeling like a complete jackass. “I’m sorry. That was my bad. I must’ve been daydreaming.”
“No, it was clearly my fault, and you obviously thought so, too, from your knee-jerk reaction. Don’t go changing your pissed-off tune just because you notice my arm is missing,” the man clipped out, bending over to scoop up his flowers.
I squatted down next to him, setting my own basket on the floor as I helped him pull his large assortment of fall foliage back together. “That’s not exactly what happened,” I said as I scooped up sunflowers, mums, and roses in various shades of yellow, orange, and red, an unexpected pink snapdragon peeking out at me. I quickly handed them back to him, surprised when he nestled them in the crook of his arm and turned to walk away.
“What? That’s it?” I asked, not understanding why I was suddenly infuriated.
He turned to look at me, his dark brown eyes piercing my façade. He ran his gaze up my body, taking in every inch of my tight black jeans, body-hugging tank top, and black leather moto jacket. “Not from around here, are you?” he asked, a grimace lifting his sensual-looking mouth into a half-smirk. “What more do you want? How about, ‘Have a nice day now, ya hear?’” With that, he turned and stormed off to the nearest register.
What a complete jerk! I fumed as I made my way down the aisle, threw every last glue stick into the basket, and wove my way to the checkout lanes. Luckily, Mr. Chip-on-his-shoulder was gone by the time I got there since I pit-stopped in the candy aisle first. A girl needed chocolate when she was this good and mad.
Why I was so discombobulated, though, I wasn’t sure; but a knot had lodged itself in my chest, and I knew I’d be working out instead of napping this afternoon. Maybe go for a jog around the lake to clear my head, if my knee cooperated.
After checking out, I made my way to the parking lot. I’d taken one step toward my car when the loud blare of a horn honked at me for the second time that day, making me jump back onto the sidewalk. I looked up just in time to see the same candy apple red Cherokee that had tried to run me off the road earlier. It slammed on its brakes to avoid hitting me again—this time while I was walking.
I’d had it with being nice today. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I hollered, throwing my middle finger in the air again at the driver. “Jesus,” I muttered as I stomped around his SUV to get to my car. “That guy has a death wish.”
As I walked by, I turned and sneered at him, even though I still couldn’t make out his face through his tinted windows. My heart thudded as the glass slowly rolled down and I was once again face-to-face with the man from the market.
“We need to stop meeting like this,” he said.
DESPITE THE NERVES causing my hands to shake, I made it back to Tranquility in record time. As I plopped my bags onto the kitchen island, I heard footsteps coming up the back stairs. I turned to see Celeste as she entered the kitchen, her cheerful disposition drooping when she took a good look at me.
I held up a hand before she could say anything. “I swear I’m fine, Celeste. I just need a quick jog and time to get ready.”
Her eyes narrowed as they focused on my shaking hands. “You still rattled from that car that almost ran you off the road?” she asked, frowning. “I cleared your energy as soon as it happened.”
Normally, a good dose of Celeste’s energy would have been enough to soothe my jangled nerves. But this was different. “I’m sure it helped—or would have helped. Except the same jerk almost ran me down again. This time while I was carrying my groceries back to my car!” I shook my head, remembering the man’s dark, piercing gaze as he stormed away from me in the market. And how he’d been amused when he rolled down his window and peered back at me in the late afternoon sunlight, causing the intensity of his eyes to soften just a notch. I ignored the butterflies that flittered in my stomach as I took in his hard, bearded jaw and the dark waves of his hair. Attraction was easy, but he didn’t even deserve that from me.
“What?” Celeste said. “You’re kidding me, right? What happened?” she asked as she grabbed a mason jar and filled it with cucumber water from a pitcher she always kept in the fridge for guests.
“Nothing. Forget about it. I’m not wasting another ounce of energy on that man. Here,” I said, tossing a grocery bag to my friend. “Glue sticks.”
I pulled out the fresh fruit I’d purchased and set it aside with the wine and brandy that I’d need later when I made my signature drink for the party.
Celeste snorted as she riffled through the bag. “Holy shit, Dez. How many did you buy? There has to be at least fifteen in here!”
I couldn’t help but grin. “I don’t know. I was pissed. I forgot to mention that the same man who likes to run me down with his car also likes to run me over in person. So yeah. Collided with him in the market too. Flowers everywhere. Complete asshat. I was so flustered by the time I got to the glue sticks I just pulled every one of them off the shelf and shoved them into my basket. I didn’t actually count them,” I admitted. I leaned over and peered into the bag, chuckling when I saw the stash that was in there. “Okay, so I might have gone a little overboard.”
“Hmm,” Celeste said, narrowing her eyes at me.
“What?” I knew that look. Her wheels were spinning. “Stop overanalyzing the situation, Celeste. It was just shitty luck. It’s done. I’m going for a jog now. Get some of this bad juju off of me.”
Celeste smirked. “You know there are no coincidences, right? We’ve talked about this before.” I watched as she fidgeted with the angel wing necklace she was wearing.
“That’s exactly what it was, Celeste. Coincidence. Now I’m going to throw on some T-Swift, lace up my ASICS, and go shake it off,” I said, taking a healthy bite of an apple.
“Wish I could join you,” Celeste said, rubbing her tummy. “But I think we’ll stay here and snuggle up by the fire instead. I want to go over our class plans for tomorrow. You all set with your part?” she asked.
“Yep! Got all the magazines you could ever want. A whole box of old photos to choose from. And some really cool paper I outsourced from a wholesaler on Etsy. Made these custom-designed graphic patterns you’ll absolutely swoon over.”
Celeste hugged me as best as she could with the girth of her blossoming belly between us. “I can’t wait to dive into the workshop tomorrow! Thanks for being here, Dez, and for being a part of my dream team. It wouldn’t be the same without you.”
Celeste looked on the verge of crying, and I couldn’t tell if it was hormonal or happiness. Either way, I wasn’t sticking around. I squeezed her hand and pulled back. “Wouldn’t be anywhere else,” I told my longtime friend. “If I’m not back in an hour, send Egan out after me.”
I headed downstairs to the spare bedroom that I shared with Celeste’s office on the basement level. Celeste and Egan’s master bedroom was down there, too, along with their new nursery and large French doors that led to the walking trails around the lake. Wellness center guests stayed on the top floor in beautiful, sunny suites that overlooked the generous mountain range that rose up in the distance on both sides of the property. Tranquility was nestled on the outskirts of Arden’s Glen, but was still in the heart of the valley.
I quickly threw on some running pants and a long-sleeve mesh shirt before lacing up my sneakers. Thanks to the asshole from earlier, there was no way I’d be able to settle down and actually take a nap now. God! He’d been so aggravating. As if my opinion had changed after seeing that he’d only had one arm. Pffft! Who did h
e think I was?
It did make me curious though. I couldn’t help but wonder how he’d lost it as I wound my way down the steep walking path, taking in deep breaths and releasing the frustration that was brewing beneath the surface. I wasn’t sure why I was so on edge all of a sudden. It was probably because every time I saw his face in my mind, I couldn’t help but see it with an artist’s eye. He would look damn good in black and white, I mused as I warmed up with an easy pace. The air was cold, but not unbearable, as I ambled along through the trees. I let the infuriatingly sexy image of the man’s rough, sexy jaw go from my mind as I trotted around the lake. I couldn’t even really call my pace jogging anymore. Not since the accident.
But I was lucky to even be walking again without a limp, or so they said. I didn’t feel so lucky when my knee tweaked as I came down wrong on a limb that crossed the dirt-covered trail. I stopped and leaned down, my hands propping my weight up as they rested on my quads. I took a deep breath and looked around at the hemlocks and sycamores that surrounded me. I could see why Celeste and Egan loved this place. The town of Arden’s Glen was too small for me, but Tranquility was the perfect place to come when I needed a break from the city. Usually the noise and the crowds were energizing, but lately they seemed to be closing in on me.
Or maybe it was just the reality of my life that was. Life without Will.
I checked my Fitbit as I neared the end of the trail, loving that I could do a full loop around the lake in less than an hour, even at my turtle’s pace. I massaged out my knee before taking the steep path back up to Tranquility. I would never take my body for granted again. Even though it had been five years since the accident, every day felt like a blessing. A new beginning. Which is why I couldn’t wait for tomorrow’s manifesting class with a new group of students. Tonight was to celebrate friendships, but tomorrow was for making magic!
I trudged up the back steps to the kitchen, not caring that I was a hot, sweaty mess. I couldn’t wait to make the sangria, get a big glass of it in hand, and then sink into a hot salt bath with a Lush bath bomb for about twenty minutes. If I couldn’t nap, this would be the next best thing. I rounded the corner and stopped cold. My heart lurched when I saw Egan and Celeste snuggled on the couch in front of the fire. As happy as I was for my friend, the hole in my heart still constricted, gasping for air. Even after five years, the pain took my breath away some days.
I shoved it back down where it belonged, buried with the images I tried to erase of Will’s young face, his electric blue eyes, that dark, wavy hair—not unlike the man’s hair from earlier. Except Will hadn’t been a jerk. He’d been my everything. Until he was nothing.
I couldn’t breathe. I raced to the fridge and grabbed the pitcher of water, needing the cold liquid to bring me back to the present, to remind me that God hadn’t been punishing me when he took Will away from me. That he wasn’t punishing me now.
Celeste turned to look at me, her nest of peace and quiet disturbed as I fumbled around in the kitchen.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you,” I said, piling my ingredients in the center of the island, biting back the tears that were threatening to spill.
“Oh, hey, Dez,” Egan said, standing. “No worries. I need to go light the fire pit table on the back deck anyway.” He bent over and offered an arm to Celeste, who took it gratefully as she stood. She still had a month to go, but she looked ready to pop. She rubbed her belly as she lifted her lips up to Egan’s, getting a quick kiss in before he disappeared onto the back porch that overlooked the lake in the distance. It would be a nice night for a fire under the stars.
“Dez,” Celeste said quietly as she made her way to the kitchen.
I chopped the apples with a fury I didn’t understand. Apple bits were everywhere by the time I was done, but I kept the tears back, and that was something. Apples could be cleaned up. My mess of a heart was a different story. “I’m fine, Celeste, really. I don’t know why I’m so damn emotional today.” I lifted a spoon of my concoction to my mouth, the brandy a nice punch to the Pino Grigio that slid effortlessly down my throat. Heaven, I thought, chewing on a bit of pear that floated in the drink.
I savored the tangy blends of apple and pear, appreciating the evergreen trees beyond the huge bay window still clinging to hope as they blossomed even in the chilly winter months. I appreciated their stubborn insistence on staying covered all year long and not dropping their protective layers. “Damn,” I said, pouring a healthy serving of the drink into an old mason jar. “I sure wish you could try this,” I said to Celeste, who still looked concerned. I rubbed her protruding belly, amazed that she was really growing a miniature human in there.
“Dez, you have to give yourself some grace. It’s a hard time of year for you, with the anniversary and all. And you were rattled today. You don’t have to join us tonight if you just need some alone time.”
She knew me well. But maybe, just for tonight, I would come out of my cocoon and socialize. Gather in the beautiful energy from the retreat participants and friends from town that Egan and Celeste had made since building their life here together. I swallowed hard. “No. This is a special night. I’m excited to meet your friends. And I’m here for work, too, so I need to buckle up, shut up, and let it go. It’s been five years, Celeste. I’ll be fine. I promise. So,” I said, taking in a ragged breath, “tell me who’s coming.”
I continued to chop apples and dice pears, making a second batch of the sangria as Celeste filled me in on the different people popping in later. It would be a smaller fete, one last celebration before the baby came.
“So, tell me a little more about Bridgette and Inez,” I said, munching on leftover apple slices. I grabbed a bamboo serving tray and layered crackers in neat rows. Guests would arrive soon, and I knew Celeste needed help getting some finger foods out. I’d get ready first, then add the cheese squares, veggies, and hummus dip.
“They are amazing women,” Celeste breathed out. “As you know, they started the youth center out on the Vega Farm property. Remember our friend Mitch? You met him last year at my grand opening, I believe,” she said, snatching a cracker from the tray with a sheepish grin. “Sorry, the baby demands it.”
“Mitch? You mean Egan’s new friend?” I asked, swiping apple peels into the sink and running the disposal. “I was at that photo shoot in Dubai then, remember?”
“Oh yeah. This mommy brain thing must be kicking in already!” Celeste said, laughing. “Well, he manages the youth center on a day-to-day basis and takes on a big-brother role for a lot of the kids. It’s a small community, but there are a surprising number of kids with depression, a lack of stability in the home, or who are recovering from addiction. He’s someone I want you to meet. I think he’d make a great addition to your Angels in Action book. Oh!” Celeste said, brightening up. “He’s the one who made the iron sculptures at the front of our property. This used to be his home.”
“What are the odds that he sculpts iron and works with Inez and Bridgette, who also use iron as a medium?” I asked. “Not many artists do.”
“Well, he doesn’t anymore. He used to be quite the bigwig in the art community. He knows Macy and Nash, too. Donated a few smaller pieces to the Feed Hope Foundation in the past. But I’ll let him tell you his story. He’s unforgettable, that’s for sure,” she said, waggling her eyebrows. “Quite the looker. A tall, dark, delicious drink for the eyes.”
“Why, thank you,” Egan said, coming in from the back patio. He walked up behind Celeste and kissed the crook of her neck. She swatted at him playfully. “Oh, you weren’t talking about me, were you?” he teased.
“You’ll always be my tall, dark, and delicious,” she said, grinning up at him.
“Oh my god, you two! Get a room already.” I made gagging noises in jest, but really, it made me happy to watch them tease each other so playfully. It tugged at my heart just a little too roughly as memories snuck their way in. I set them aside and stuck to the single track I was familiar with and like
d to ride these days. “So tell me more about this Mitch guy. If he’s as hot as he sounds, I may just be having a merry Christmas after all!”
Celeste tossed a tea towel at me and laughed. “Oh my God, Dez. Go easy on the poor man. He won’t know what hit him.”
“That’s my plan,” I said as I grabbed my sangria and headed downstairs. Yes, the night was looking promising already. It had been a tiring day, and I was looking forward to soothing my knee in the bathtub. Fantasizing about meeting a dark, sexy man while the water slipped lazily over my smooth skin was only a bonus. I checked my Fitbit and grinned. I had just enough time for a quick physical release of a different kind. Oh, Mitch. I hope you’re as hot in person as you are in my imagination. I sunk into the steaming hot water, the smell of orange blossoms floating up around my naked body as my hand sank beneath the surface and I relaxed for the first time all day.
I WAS EARLY, but I wanted to get the flowers I’d brought for the party into some water and have a few minutes to catch up with Egan in private. I had a new online tool I wanted to talk to him about that would allow kids to chat with counselors anonymously, while allowing us to hit a panic button to dispatch police and medic if we felt as if their life was in real, imminent danger. It would track their current location when the call came in, but that information and the caller’s identity would not be made known to the trained counselor on the other end of the phone for true privacy’s sake. So many kids had stories and feelings they were hiding, and I wanted to give them a safe way to talk without being scared that they’d get in trouble. I just needed someone with Egan’s business savvy and background to help me launch it locally. If it worked as well as I thought it would, I might ask him to be a business partner and help me launch it nationally.
Celeste wrapped me in a hug as soon as I entered the kitchen. Over the past year and a half, I’d gotten to know her and Egan quite well, and I now considered them some of my closest friends. It was nice to have real friends for once. Ones who didn’t give a shit who you used to be, how much money was in your bank account, or what you could do for them. Celeste and Egan were genuine, and I needed a lot more of that in my life.