And that just can’t happen. If he dies, Maria gets everything, something my husband and his business partners won’t allow.
There are a few details we’ll need to let him in on before we turn him loose.
Tony
We sit, facing the door. I sat outside, giving her space, till I saw two sets of headlights coming up the road. Now I’m here.
When Frankie walks in, I’m startled. I didn’t realize I’d been staring at her, mesmerized by her beauty. My wife. She tolerates it. Her head high, she looks anywhere but into my eyes. Won’t give a fucking inch my way. I want to scream at her, plead with her, fall to my knees and beg her, but it won’t penetrate her icy exterior.
I’ve tried it all. Over and over again.
Now, all I’m left with…is this. So I watch her as she greets her penance. Frankie, the one to solve all of Blue’s problems. She’s the epitome of Southern hospitality, shaking his hand. Her blonde curls shake with the movement, as the light catches her highlights. A halo of light radiates from my angel I usually see her wet in the pool with the tail. She’s always loved to swim, so I make sure to get a mermaid Favor at least four times a week.
I’ve always been a sucker for the Scarlett O’Hara types, the Southern belles. I think that might even be the reason she chose the accent, the clothes, this persona.
For me. Gretchen’s from the Bronx. Had never been anywhere near the South till we branched out here, to the south. Of California.
This whole act screams look at me. So I do, giving her my undivided attention for as many precious seconds as she’ll allow.
She lived this hell for ten years, two months, fifteen days. So excuse me if I linger. It’s been a while.
Gretchen lives by the fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, get the fuck out of my life code.
All I want is to get the fuck back in. By any means necessary.
Her mouth moves, introducing me. I take one last look, studying her profile before I stand and shake his hand.
He’s bigger than I thought. Weathered-in leather jacket and denim, he looks like he could use a drink. I offer him one and go to refresh my own. So that’s Gretchen’s idea of muscle? Beefy and windblown? Doesn’t even look like he brushed his hair today.
Gretchen stands and hugs him, the perfect picture of sympathy in a pink dress and white gloves. Look at me!
She gives him a sad smile as she looks him over. Looking for something? Like a flaw, some defect. I don’t know.
When she’d got in the front of the limo, that’s the same look she had on her face. She’s always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I linger in the kitchen while they talk. She’ll explain the doll bullshit. I can’t even stomach it anymore. So I stay in here and drink a fresh beer.
I want her to see me. Not my twin. Me. I won’t stop trying.
When I walk back in and hand him a beer, my eyes are on her. As I recount the facts to Frankie, I steal as many glances as I can. I’m high on just a look. One smile could get me through another ten years. Would ease my suffering. But she refuses, won’t even blink my way.
Denying me, giving me no warmth. And that’s okay. Maybe I deserve it. If I could kill my piece of shit brother, I’d beat him to death. Again.
Kill him twice for what he did to my girl. Me.
He left me alive so I could look but not touch. I could beg and get no relief. The rest of my life lived out watching her on a screen. Paying for Favors like I’m some asshole and not her husband. Yes, Adrien took everything, stripped her of every feeling, leaving only with the intense desire to feel safe.
And she doesn’t get that with me. I let her down twice. That’s the last look, I swear to myself, and turn to the biker who’s earned her trust. What does he have that I don’t?
He looks over my shoulder at my guys in the kitchen. “There for her protection, not mine.” He’s smart, pinned them to the microscope and marked them.
Good, so we all know where we stand. He knows I don’t trust him, and I’m sure the feeling’s mutual.
I look at Gretchen. She never returns the look, just gives a slight nod, eyes downcast. I feel drunk from the attention.
Gretchen says, “Blue is here, and she’s sleeping. She’s had a hard go these last few days. There are a few things we need to talk about, and then she needs you.”
Frankie looks up at that words. “I need her, too,” he admits with a nervous look around the place.
Gretchen smiles. Like rays of sunshine. “That’s what we were hoping you’d say.
“I’ll just check in on Blue.” I know she doesn’t want to hear this part, but I can’t help feeling like she’s running from me. She doesn’t need to be here. Before I go into what she wants me to say, I give him a little advice.
“We’ve got Blue, her body. Her soul? A different story. Gretchen says she’s different…understandable. She needs someone strong to take care of her. That’s you.”
He nods. “Yes sir.” Like I’m his fucking father or something. But it’s respectful, I’ll give him that.
“I’ve been taking care of the Gustavez family for years. Even back when Senior, Javi’s dad, was still alive.
“My twin brother, Adrien, brought me in, right about the time Senior was separating from his wife, Maria.
“Had me look in on the kid, Javi. When I saw how his mother treated him, well, who could blame the kid really? Maria was bat-shit crazy, everyone knew it. What no one could figure out was why the hell the kid stayed.
“It was just a matter of time. When Gretchen told me how she found Maria, Javi’s mother, the state she was in, I wasn’t the least bit surprised. Thought it’d be a butcher knife sticking out of her chest. Sadistic bitch. And I don’t want to even think of the time, the fucking wasted time, she put into some of her revenge fests.
“She had this box, bigger than a shoebox, smaller than a stereo box, but not by much. Filled with feces. Absolutely overflowing with it. I mean, the time, can you imagine? To accumulate that vast amount of shit. The dedication to collect your, uh, sample and open the lid on the fetid box every morning. And was she making the kid shit in the box, too?
“That’s what Senior wanted to know. Fucking giftwrapped with a giant black bow. I mean, what the fuck, right? I just remember his secretary clicking in and dropping it on the floor with a grimace. She wiped her hands on the front of her skirt, and all I saw were dark, wet tracks.
“Instinctively, I checked the bottom of my shoes, making sure that smell wasn’t coming from me. As she held back a gag, she still kept it professional. ‘This one’s leaking.’
“Senior turned, his eyes alight. ‘She remembered. Probably a fruit basket. Maybe some birthday vino. Hey Tony.’ I just remember the pride in his voice. The fucking hope.
“He ripped into it, and suddenly I didn’t want my wedge of birthday cake anymore. I slid the china plate onto the edge of his desk. ‘Whatever you say, Senior.’
“Where was that fucking smell coming from him? Was he passing gas, is that what it was? With utter disgust, he reared back, dropping the wet package with a splat on his alligator shoes.
“I jumped up, thinking someone’s trying to whack him, trying to look every which way at once.
“His shoulders sagged. He pointed to the wet, putrid pile. At first I couldn’t see it, it looked like it was inside of a piece of feces. A diamond? Her ring, a symbol of their everlasting unity and love, swimming in a sea of shit.
“I pulled a white folded hanky out of my pocket. I smelled my wife’s perfume as I offered it to him.
“‘Thank God she didn’t want you dead, I’m sitting right next to you. Jesus, man. I’m shaken up, I can only imagine how you feel.’
“After the shit-o-gram, things changed. Senior tried to fight, but only so hard. He had a bad ticker, didn’t feel he was fit to take care of the rebellious teen. Javi had some major issues, even then. Signs that all was not right in the belfry. He got kicked out of school for shoving a steaming
plate of lasagna into another kid’s face. Caused scarring, and there was absolutely nothing that my family could do to make these problems go away. Our influence only goes so far when a cafeteria full of teens saw the whole thing.
“He was ‘homeschooled after that.’ All that meant was more manipulation time with his mother. That kid never had a chance with that woman. Her and weird kink. Strange ideas about sex. I wouldn’t call her a nympho, no more like insatiably unbalanced.
“The only name on my watch list: Maria, his wife. Up until the poop in the box, I’d thought everyone was overreacting a bit, to tell the truth. She was a tiny little thing, looked a lot like Sophia Loren, demure. Maybe a little too flirty with the help. Wasn’t shy about making her needs known at all times of the day and fucking night. Breakfast was interesting in that house.
“I didn’t see a whole hell of a lot of what went on, Senior chose to stay away. Never ate anything she cooked, he’d found a case of rat poison under the stairs, and after that, let’s just say he didn’t even brush his teeth in that house.
“He stayed away longer and longer, until well, the shit bomb. Then he never went back.
“The stories Javi told Gretchen. The worst kind of shit, twisted shit, with his own mother and a cop. Just wrong shit. Maybe he was into that kind of shit, who knows. All I know is the kid stayed.
“It took his dad in a box for him to wake the fuck up. Or at least, I thought he did.
“For the next six months, after Senior’s funeral, I lost track of him. Had my, uh, own shit to deal with. My brother, he hurt Gretchen.”
I take a sip of my beer, studying him. He’s leaning forward, in my space. This little tête-à-tête must be killing him. He looks to the hall, where Gus stands. Probably wondering if we kidnapped her and are shaking him down for a ransom.
I wipe my lip and get back to the mess.
“That’s how that fucking crazy bitch was able to get a soaked box of shit by me. Right under my nose. Things were on their way to becoming disastrous in my family home.”
Frankie’s leg taps, anxious. But his eyes remain focused on me. Wary, like I might bite. His patience will only hold for so long. His control is ebbing as he waits to hear what it is we came here for. “We’ve all got a load of shit stored up in our gut, Frank. Don’t let revenge make you start looking for a box.”
His jaw ticks, but he nods. “Thank you.” He stands, and I stand with him, patting his shoulder and pulling him in with a firm grip. “He has to stay alive…even it’s breathing through a tube. You got me?”
Gretchen returns from the big house just as we finish. I know she was listening outside the door. I love my crazy wife.
Gretchen
I leave them. I just make Tony nervous anyway. I look down at the sleeping girl, the red bracelets of pain around her arms and feet.
Hoping to cheer her, I drop the new headband on a stack of clothes by the door.
As I get prepare to go, Gus grabs my suitcase. I’m leaving. Back to the safety of the house. I pray that what Frankie brings her will help her to heal. Her heart must have broken at Javi’s betrayal. And then hardened.
I ask for a minute and go in to wake her. We won’t see each other again. Unless they kill Javi… No, not even then. Then Tony will be the last face she sees.
Her eyes follow me around the room, already awake.
I tell her one last fairytale, about the man I met tonight. A man that would walk through fire just for a glimpse of her. I tell her about the love that shines in his eyes at the mere mention of her name. I know she has a problem believing any of this, but reassure her. He’s been waiting days to be here. For you, Bluebelle. Frankie’s actions speak louder than words. I tell her that’s he’s here now, just waiting. All she has to do is ask.
She nods. “I feel like I’m using him, Gretchen. He wanted happiness, I wanted Javi.”
I smile down at her. “He looks like the kind of man that takes care of his lady, at all times.”
Her voice is low, so I lean in. “Something’s broken, in here.” She points to her chest. “It’s leaking hate, I don’t know how to stop it.”
I can hear the tears in her voice. “Blue, we talked about this. Revenge may not heal that crack in your heart, but it’s a hell of a Band-Aid.”
And I can’t help it, I’ve wanted to know ever since Brad told me. “Blue?”
“Hmmm?”
“Why didn’t you give him a chance? Frankie. Brad told me, well, you and Frankie had a date, the best date. Yet you took Javi back”
She thinks about it. Pain fills her eyes, remorse, then blankness. “I didn’t think I deserved any better. Frankie was better. Frankie was every possibility I never dared to dream for myself. It’s like eating mushy oatmeal when you really want crispy French toast. Yet you’re too lazy. It’s too much work to get up and cook. The oatmeal’s here. So you choke it down, the whole time wishing for something better, sweeter, more to your liking.
“I was so beaten down by life. Javi was easy. He was already down in the dirt. I just had to roll around in the muck to find him.
“I wasn’t ready to step off the crazy train. Actually pick a destination and just go. But I am now. When this is all over, it’s happening, Gretch. I’ve got a place in mind, and the train is slowing down. I’m ready to step off at a place I’ve envisioned. It’s what kept me going, these dreams, even when they were filled with monsters, I could dive deep and find serenity there.
Her voice lowers in a conspiring tone. “It’s a beach. Dreams of sea lions and Transformers kites, and I know, in my heart, it’s all real. I don’t know where it is yet, or how I’ll find it, but I know it’s out there somewhere, and I’m going to get there.” There’s a fierce determination about her, that floods her cheeks with color, and her beauty is there. Weak and beaten, but still fighting to rise to the surface.
I reach for her hand, and she stiffens. I settle for a pat on the back of it.
I’m careful not to trip over the case of water next to the bed. Her own necessary insurance. I understand.
There’s also a loaded weapon in the side table drawer. I’ve got men in the woods watching. It’s not enough. She’ll never feel safe again.
I step on something that cracks under my shoe. I bend and pick up the new headband giving her a quizzical look. “You dropped this,” I say, moving to hand it to her.
“No, I fucking threw it. I never want to see a blue flower again. Ever. Goodbye, Gretchen.”
That’s different. Exhilarating, actually. I’m a bad guy. Blue thinks I’m the bad guy. And that’s okay, just so long as she realizes, “Sasha had nothing to do with any of this. She didn’t know.”
“Gretch, what would you have done if I didn’t sign the papers? What if I didn’t sell Javi’s Chubby Chaser’s shares to you? What then?”
I don’t smile. “Let’s just be glad we never needed to find that out.”
I won’t see her again. “Goodbye, love.”
The cynical laugh sounds like a crow’s caw. This is what I’ve done. The price, paid in Blue’s innocence. I used her. I’ll never forget that. Yet I’d do it again. My freedom is worth it.
She gives me an even glare that makes me swallow. Whatever she needs to say or do to make this easier for her, I’m all for it. “Love isn’t here anymore. If it ever was in the first place. Don’t talk to me about love, Gretchen. It bores me. Talk to me about revenge. That’s the only thing that excites me now.”
Her eyes judge me. I can take it. I’ve been judged before.
“That’s funny, Blue. We’re more alike than you care to admit. I built my whole world on revenge.”
My heart softens. Blue, never saw it coming. You’d never think of a jelly donut as a threat.
Whether it was with a whip or a waffle, he hurt her. “I’m sorry, Blue. For—”
She holds up her hand. “Don’t.”
So I don’t.
Her eyes don’t meet mine. There’s a frost to her tone. “Just get the c
heck for my divorce settlement ready.
I nod as I close the door. I will. It’s a small price to pay, a pittance really, to get what I’ve wanted all along. Control of my own life. No more favors to repay. Money to launder, sure, I’m not crazy.
I walk past the closed door. The room where she almost died. It’s all there. She wouldn’t let Gus change a thing. I’d almost feel sorry for Javi if I could feel anything other than disgust. He may never have forced himself on her, hit her, berated her, but he did something worse.
The vilest thing. He took her innocence and turned it against her. Her naivety blinding her to the monster he is. He took all that was good in her and shattered it. I hope she’ll make it back to Dr. Timlan and find her way out of this. Frankie will help with that.
Even with all the shit that’s going on, I can’t help but feel a twinge of excitement. It’ll all be mine; I’ve got big plans for the business. Well, once my business partner’s locked away. This was the final push that was needed.
Frankie
Heartache and joy feel about the same way. I could feel your presence; it was like my sail’s caught a heavy gale, full speed ahead, and then just as fast as it blew in…it was gone. The sails fell flat. No breeze in sight. The letdown of rowing home starting to sink in.
That’s about how I felt when I found you, Blue.
I’d been going out of my mind, wanting to kill someone. No, not someone, him. That piece of shit that took you.
……
Gretchen
One final stop before we leave this place. The guesthouse. It’s my turn to talk to Frankie. “See, Blue and I have a deal. I promised her one night with her husband, after that, he’s mine. Goes back into the hospital. But this time it’s a locked involuntary hold.”
I point towards the Manilla envelope between us. “This right here is insurance. Evidence of his crimes. His doctor already has a copy. He will be punished, about that, there is no doubt. I want you to think of that and keep your anger in check. She needs payback, not permanent retribution.” I look to the crew in the kitchen. Headed by my husband and nod. This is the final piece; Frankie has a right to know what exactly it is he’s in for.
Black and Blue (Chubby Chasers, Inc. Series Book 3) Page 16