by Will Blue
"I am just grinding, baby." He said as he continued. It all felt so good that I just continued to go with the flow. When Nari's dick began to slide in me, I didn't try to stop him. I grabbed the sides of the chair for support.
In retrospect, I don’t know why I was letting this man go this far with me. There used to be a time when I felt that I couldn’t make the grade, but here I was juggling two famous, gorgeous men while letting another one have his way with me.
Pleasure and guilt both took turns in my mind. It was too late to stop now. “Might as well enjoy the scandalous ride that I was on”, I said to myself. I pushed the negativity out of my head and let go.
He was banging me into delirium when I felt him climax. I busted my nut at the same time. We were both breathing hard at the end. At first, I felt good. It had been amazing, but that was before reality set in. I had just let Nari cum inside of me. What had I done?
Chapter 25
"You caught gonorrhea?! From Nari?! Didn't I tell your ass to…"
"I know, I know. I fucked up… big time. And YES, I know that you have warned me about shit like this and I didn't listen. Now, I have made my bed and now I gotta lie in it. Is there anything else that you want to add?"
"You nasty ass nigga." I had called Curtis for a little comforting or guidance. Clearly, I wasn't going to get either one from him. The doctor had given me some medicine for my “situation” Believe me when I say, I can't wait for this fucking gonorrhea to be gone!
"Are you going to do anything, but remind me about how fucked up this shit is?"
"Yep. I am gonna ask you what you plan to do about Morris. You know he gets in today from his trip. With him only being there for the weekend before being whisked back off to film in Toronto, you know he is gonna want some booty. What you gonna do? Give the shit to him?"
"No!"
"Then what's your plan, Superhead?"
If Curtis had been there at that moment, I would have smacked the shit out of him for that Superhead comment. But then again, he would hit back HARD! Next thing I would know, I would be looking up at the ceiling of the emergency room. I don't think that would be a good look. However, that would excuse me from having sex with Morris or facing him before I ridded myself of this damn STD.
"I have everything under control. Trust me. I know exactly what I must do."
As soon as that comment came out of my mouth, I heard the front door open. Morris was back. "Oh shit, I gotta go. I will call you later. I hung up the phone and walked towards the door. Morris was struggling with his luggage. He had been away for a week and of course he had to drastically over pack. He took like a months’ worth of clothes and shoes with him and who knows how much he bought while being away.
"Hey baby," he said as soon as he saw me. He walked over and gave me a quick peck.
"Miss me?"
"Of course I did. I have been lonely here without you."
"Anyone interested in your songs yet?"
"I know that they have been shopped around. I know Nari mentioned something about Trey Songz and Mario‘s camps getting hold to them."
"Oh, Nari must be wearing your ass out, huh?”
"Not more than usual." I think my discomfort level must have been apparent in my voice. But then again, if it was, Morris did not seem to notice. He just walked back to his room to put his stuff away.
"So babe, I was thinking we could just order in today and have a day alone. Just me and you," he called back from the room. "Sounds good?"
"Yeah. I think that sounds like a plan. I will order some Chinese takeout."
"Great! Remember to get a two liter of something to drink too because I know you have drank up everything in the house while I was gone."
I made the phone call to the Chinese place and we had our food within thirty minutes. We sat on the floor in the living room to eat and talk. One thing that I could always say about Morris and I, was that we enjoyed each other’s' company. We could sit around and talk about absolutely nothing for hours and not get bored. Today was no exception.
"What's Love Got to Do With It or The Color Purple?"
"What? How can I choose between the two of them?"
"Come on," Morris egged me on. "You made me pick between Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Martin."
"Yeah and I do believe your answer was A Different World."
"And? I liked that show more than either one of those shows you named."
"But it didn't answer the question."
"Fine! Fresh Prince. Now answer my question!" I thought for a minute about that one. I mean, come on. Those are two classic movies. To properly answer the question, I had to pull out my acting skills and do my best imitation.
"I 'members that day in the store with Miss Millie. I's feelin' real down. I's feelin' mighty low." I tried to hold in my laughter as I recited Oprah's lines from The Color Purple. Morris joined in as I finished the scene. "And when I seed you, I knowd they is a God. I knowd they is a God." We both bust out into laughter. Once our chuckles subsided, Morris excused himself to fetch something out the room. I knew that this was the time to carry out my plan.
I quickly fetched a bag from behind the sofa and pulled out a bottle of red fizzy liquid. I popped the bottle open a grabbed Morris' drink. I had gotten strawberry soda for us to drink so that Morris wouldn't notice a difference in taste or color. He had almost finished his present cup full of soda so I filled it back up, half with soda and half with my secret weapon, cherry flavored magnesium citrate. For those who don't know what that is, I put it like this. My mom used to always keep a bottle of this stuff in the refrigerator for whenever she felt a little backed up, if you know what I mean. She would give some to me too and I swear it would feel like I was dying. I would be in the bathroom all fucking day on the toilet. This was not just a diuretic. This shit would have you letting go of shit you ate when you was two years old. I figured that if Morris drinks this, he would have no time to try to sex me up or down. And just in case one bottle didn’t do the trick, I bought two bottles worth which should have him all tied up for the weekend.
By the time he came back, I had put away the bottle again. He sat right back down with an envelope in his hand.
"I refreshed your drink, baby. I saw you were low."
"Awww, thank you, babe." He grabbed his cup and took a big gulp. His face scrunched up for a second. Oh shit, could he taste the citrate? He took another swallow and just put the cup down. "The soda taste a little strong."
"Oh, haven't noticed," I tried to say casually. Morris began to smile brightly. Something was up with him. He brought the envelope to the forefront and began to tap it against his chin. "What's that?"
"Umm, just a little surprise for my baby." He got up and took a seat closer to me. He passed me the already opened envelope. I didn't even look to see what the front of it said. I pulled it out and it looked like to be some kind of paperwork. I flipped through them and came upon an official looking document.
"This looks like some kind of certificate."
"Baby, you know I am so proud of you and your career which is taking off. You were always so supportive of me when I started acting and shooting my first movie. Now, I am about to do my second and you are doing your music thing. You are about to blow up in a major way. You are doing it your way, baby. Your star is shining brightly. It’s so bright, in fact, that I got a star named after you." I turned back to Morris with the papers in both my hands.
"Are you serious?" I felt a tear coming to my eye. That was the sweetest thing that I had ever heard of. Morris knew that he had just scored major points. He was grinning from ear to ear.
"I love you, babe." He leaned in and kissed me. I dropped the papers to the side and showed him my gratitude through my tongue. All of a sudden, he drew back. He had a troubled look on his face. He grabbed his stomach and started to moan a little. "Are you okay?"
"Uh, I will be back." He ran to the bathroom and closed the door. I felt bad because I knew that the magnesium citrate had sta
rted to take effect, but I looked at it as a good thing. After getting a star named after me, normally I would have given him some. Now, at least, all temptation was gone.
Chapter 26
"Gina Ramirez?" I screamed as I threw the tabloid in his face. It was the headline on all of the popular celebrity papers. How could this be happening again?
"Baby, I don't know what you are talking about. You know better than to trust what those things say."
"Yeah? Well, let's review what they have to say again. Shall we?" I stormed over to where Morris was standing and snatched the newest issue of In Touch magazine from near his feet.
"Baby..."
"Naw, its all on page 12. Let's see." I began to read aloud. "What is causing that new glow on R&B songstress Gina Ramirez's face? Is it a new face cream or the latest Hollywood spa treatment? Sources say that we will have the answer in around nine months when Ramirez and boyfriend Morris Epson welcome their first child. It is reported that Ramirez is very excited about the pregnancy and is already shopping for baby clothes."
"I can explain..."
"Oh, now you can explain?" I snapped the paper back close and tossed it aside. I watched Morris as his eyes darted back and forth between me and the discarded tabloid. I could tell that he was fishing for something to say.
"It’s not what you think!"
"God! Is that what you come up with? Is that your grand announcement to explain shit? It’s not what I think? Then what is it?"
"Okay, I admit it. I fucked up."
"Fucked up or fucked her?”
"Baby, I am so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen." Tears began to run down his face. My emotions began to get the better of me as well. My heart was beating out of my chest. I did not know what I was feeling more; the pain of being betrayed once more by the man that I loved or anger that I had actually trusted his dumb ass to be faithful to me. I snatched of the necklace that he had given me when we first got together and threw it to the floor.
"I got you, nigga. I got you. You can get yours cause for damn sure I am getting mine!"
"Getting yours? What the fuck you mean getting yours?"
"That's right, muhfucka. You ain’t the only one that can have fun up in here. That's why I been with Breion too." I half didn't realize what I was doing by admitting my secret tryst to Morris. The look on Morris' face made me regret what I had said.
"Hold up. You with that nigga? Like you with me or you just been fucking him?" Now, I felt like the dumbass. I stumbled and fumbled my words.
"Uh, I mean, uh..."
"Uh uh hell! So how long yall been… doing yall thing?"
"It's not like that, Morris." I could see Morris getting angrier with each passing moment. The fire in his eyes scared me.
Why did I open my big mouth? Was it revenge, guilt, or stupidity that had fed that need? Maybe it had been a mixture of the three. Although I was shitting bricks, a part of me was glad that Morris could feel everything that I had felt all this time.
"So does he fuck you good? He lay you on your back and give it to you?"
"Hold the fuck up! Yeah, be mad, but you are going way out of line. Don't do this!" My heart was racing faster than before.
"Alright, I ain't gonna do shit then but leave." Morris snatched off his matching necklace, turned away, and left out the door.
I watched him leave out the door without trying to make him turn around. I couldn't will myself to speak. I could barely breathe. Actually, I couldn't breathe at all. I grabbed my chest as I cried like I had never done before. I started gasping for the air that was not easily going to my lungs. I felt dizzy and out of control. I fell to my knees as I tried to catch my breath or at least control it. I was having a panic attack. I had only had one of these before in life. I thought I was going to die. After a few minutes, I finally got to the point where I thought the worse had past. I looked up at the door wishing that Morris was standing there. Then I looked back down at our necklaces which were now lying side by side on the floor. I grabbed them both and held them to my chest.
The half empty bottle of Smirnoff in my hand should have helped me forget my problems. Instead it amplified my troubles. I welcomed the taste of the vodka as it burned the back of my throat. I didn't have a chaser nor did I really want one. Like most intoxicated people, I got the urge to drunk call. I knew not to call Morris. Even in my elevated state, I recognized that it would be a wasted call. I needed to vent. I needed to tell someone my frustrations.
"Wassup, nigga!" Curtis did not answer back right away.
"You tell me. Have you been drinking? Naw, better yet the question should be what."
"Just a little vodka, nigga."
"And why?"
"Me and Morris done. He don't want me no more. I told him about Breion and now I am alone."
I was expecting some kind of sympathy from Curtis right about now. Well, that is what I wanted or thought I needed. I wish that is what I had gotten.
"I know you are not surprised. I hope you ain’t. I told you that your fucking around was going to get you in trouble. And now look at you. You know I love you, but you fucked up. I know you don't want to hear I told you so right now, but too bad. When Breion first came into the picture, I admit I did egg it on. It was new and exciting and finally you could give me some juicy stories instead of you living vicariously through the shit I go through. So, no I did not help things at first, but I did later tell you that you had to choose. Morris or Breion. Breion or Morris. But then here comes Nari. I am surprised you ain’t do nothing with Xcell. I aint calling you a hoe, but... I dont know. You haven't exactly been exercising restraint."
"But I don't want Nari! And I sho don't want Xcell's drug addicted ass!"
"Then that leads us back to Morris or Breion. Which one? And are you sad and drinking right now because Morris found out or because you can't play your little game no more. Or maybe the problem is that now you really have to choose. Do you fall into Breion's waiting arms or try to get Morris back? And truth be told, Morris wasn't doing anything that you weren't doing. He cheated. He had other relationships on the side. At least his were with women; almost excusable. But you were creeping behind his back with other dudes and also loving one of them back. You love Breion. I know you do. So now what? What you going to do now?"
I sat there and thought about the question that had just been asked. I took another long drink of vodka as I thought it over. How did I get into this mess? Why did I allow myself to get involved with these guys? I liked the attention, I guess. I think that at first the thought of being desired kinda got me off. It was innocent though. I didn't act on it really. When Morris cheated on me, I felt betrayed and pissed as hell. I began to think that whatever I was doing was okay since it was just karma coming back at Morris. Didn't he deserve to know how it felt to be cheated on, lied to, and humiliated? Didn't he?
"Hello? Are you there?"
"Yeah," I said after Curtis knocked me out of my thoughts. "I need some time to think. I will call you back." Curtis let out a loud sigh and hung up.
I drank more vodka, but the bottle ended too soon. I still had not thought everything through. I need more to drink. There was a liquor store a few blocks away that was calling me. I jumped into my car and headed out.
The road seemed a bit blurry, but I had everything under control. I was okay. I wasn't drunk. I turned off my street and rode the curb for a few yards. I just had to get my bearings. I would be fine. I avoided hitting a fire hydrant by a hair. My heart raced as I jerked the wheel to the left. That was a close one. It had my heart racing. Too bad I didn't notice the stop sign I was coming up to. This time, I wouldn't be so lucky.
CRASH!
Chapter 27
I have done so many things wrong in the past, especially this year. I was weak. I admit it. I was this attention hungry whore who tried to put reason to bullshit. But at the end of the day, bullshit is bullshit. I should have never played with hearts and dicks like I did. I love Morris and I will always w
ill. And I love Breion. He compliments me in every way.
When I first met Morris, I never knew that we would ever be a couple. I was an insecure little grown boy who didn't believe that he had talent or the ability to reel in a man of quality. And despite his faults, Morris was a man of quality. He had romanced me and shown me the love that I thought I always deserved. Actually, I hadn't known that I was worth that much admiration. I often wondered why he loved me. Little ol' me! Who was I to have the love of this Adonis? When he cheated on me, it was like all my insecurities were validated. I wasn't worthy. I wasn't rich and famous like Lailiana. I could never be Lailiana! Maybe he looked at her and saw the mother of his children. That was something that I could surely never give him. And then there was Breion.
Breion was so beautiful! And when I talk about beauty, I mean that he was beautiful inside and out. When I needed a shoulder to lean on, he was there. Sure, Curtis was there for me, but what I got from Breion was different. He made me feel whole again. Like one of those men from a Tyler Perry movie, Breion rejuvenated me. He recognized me as an equal. He was the best listener and soothed my soul. We had a deep connection. I think it may have something to do with us being really artistic. Funny thing is that he brought out that side of me! Before him, I dabbled in writing. It was only a hobby for me. And now look at me! I am a songwriter working with big names in the industry.