by Lisa Harris
He took a bite of his dessert. “Besides helping my mom with the decorations here, there’s the annual Christmas parade and concert in town, and volunteering for the Giving Tree at church that helps families in our community who are in need.”
“That all sounds fun.”
“It is my favorite time of the year.”
She followed him to the couch and sat next to him before sampling a bite of ice cream and berries. She knew she needed to relax, but her mind wouldn’t stop working on the what-ifs.
“I’m guessing you’re not really in the Christmas mood right now,” he added.
“Not really. I keep thinking about the file we read through. It said that Jinx normally lets his soldiers handle all his dirty work,” she told him. “It’s one reason why the man has never been caught. But it also said that this time was different. He shot that couple himself. That must mean their deaths were personal. And what he didn’t count on was having a witness.”
“What are you thinking?” Griffin asked.
“I’ve been going over and over in my head about what you said about my having information he wants.”
“And...”
“I still can’t remember anything, but my gut tells me you’re right.” She set her dessert on her lap, her appetite soured. “I just can’t pull up the information.”
“My mom was right. Try not to think about it. I have a feeling the more you try to bring those memories to the surface, the harder it’s going to be.”
“Maybe, but it’s the not knowing that makes me feel the most vulnerable. Like I’ve somehow stepped into a gunfight but I have nothing to defend myself. This is something I don’t know how to deal with. I can’t keep my brain from spinning.”
“There is something else to consider.”
She drew in a deep breath. “What’s that?”
“My mom told me it’s possible that memory loss can come from witnessing something traumatic. Like the car wreck and the agents being shot.”
Tory worked to process what he said as she tried digging into the cobbler, not liking the implications. “Meaning I’m too afraid to remember.”
“It’s a possibility.”
“I guess I’d like to think I’m stronger than that. I work in the emergency room, which goes to reason that I’ve witnessed a lot of traumatic situations.”
Whether it was true or not, the thought made her feel as if she were weak. As if her mind couldn’t handle what she had seen and had literally shut down. As far as she was concerned, the lump on the back of her head sounded like a more realistic option. But either way, her memories still refused to surface.
Griffin shook his head. “This has nothing to do with how strong you are. That’s how God created your mind. A kind of protection when having to face something traumatic. Maybe things are different because, this time, the trauma was directed toward you.”
She took another bite of the tart berries with the sweet ice cream. Like, witnessing an agent shot dead in front of her. Was that enough to erase her memories? She might not know for sure, but there was one thing she was certain of. Not being able to do anything about it made her feel helpless.
“Your parents are sweet—and your mom is such a good cook,” she said. “I just hope they know how much I appreciate their taking me in.”
“They enjoy company and are known to spoil their boys every once in a while.”
“I’ll admit I don’t mind being spoiled a bit. And this is delicious.”
“I told you you’d feel safe here. I want you to feel safe here.”
She caught the intensity in Griffin’s eyes and wondered why he was doing this. In reality, he didn’t have to. She was pretty certain that guarding an FBI witness wasn’t anywhere in his job description, and he could have easily passed it on to someone else. But, for some reason, she was glad he had taken the job. Because there was something about his presence that was calming and reassuring. Something about him that made her want to pull back the layers and find out everything there was to know about him.
Especially since uncovering exactly who she was seemed impossible at the moment.
“It’s strange to think I don’t have any family,” she said, giving in to the need to probe beyond the surface. “There’s got to be someone out there who’s worried about me. Someone who knew what I was doing. I don’t even know if I have a significant other.”
Her gaze shifted back to the tree with a dozen presents already beneath it. Had she put up a tree back home? Were there presents underneath it? How could she forget something like that?
“Have any more memories surfaced?” he asked.
“Not really. I went over the FBI file half a dozen times before dinner, certain something would jog my memory, but so far it’s still just a bunch of foggy details, with nothing more than a few impressions.” She took another bite of her dessert. “Though I’ve learned that I like ice cream and berry cobbler way too much.”
“I’d think something was seriously wrong with you if you didn’t.”
“Funny.” She couldn’t help but notice how his eyes smiled and how his brown eyes had flecks of gold in them.
“And I’ve learned a few more things about you,” he said.
“Like?” She sat back and waited for him to continue.
“You’re strong. You have a sense of humor.” Griffin paused. “And you’re beautiful.”
“I’m guessing I blush at compliments, as well.”
He smiled back, but she didn’t like the way he stirred her heart. She couldn’t remember what she ate for breakfast yesterday, let alone if there was someone else in her life. This definitely wasn’t the time or place to be feeling the tug of an attraction. All she was going to end up with was a broken heart. And somehow—despite everything she’d forgotten—she knew she’d had at least one of those.
* * *
Griffin studied Tory for a moment while she dug into her dessert, wondering why he’d said something so...personal. She was beautiful, but to say it out loud?
Still, there was something different about her from most women he met—something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Despite the alarming situation she was being forced to deal with, she was managing to hold herself together better than he’d expected. With her medical training, it made sense. She was used to making decisions in the middle of a crisis situation, but having a man who was wanted by the FBI after you brought things to a whole other level. Those feelings of fear and vulnerability were amplified with her memories suppressed. Being attracted to someone who couldn’t remember who they were seemed ridiculous.
He needed a distraction and he had a feeling so did she.
“How about a movie?” he said. “It might keep your mind off of all of this for a while.”
And keep his mind off the woman sitting next to him.
She took another bite. “For some reason, I don’t think I’m a huge movie fan, but I think I’d like that tonight.”
“Good. My parents have a huge selection of DVDs. What’s your favorite?” He sat back, wanting to take back the question. “I’m sorry.”
“Forget it. Why don’t you choose?”
He set his dessert on the coffee table, grabbed one of the movies he knew his mother loved and slipped it into the DVD player. Why did he keep forgetting he wasn’t there to get to know her? This was a job, nothing more. Besides, how was he supposed to get to know her when she couldn’t remember her past? Even if it did eventually come back, his job was just until the FBI detail got here.
Halfway through the movie, they added a big bowl of buttered popcorn. When the final credits rolled, he realized she was leaning against his shoulder.
“Are you still awake?” he asked.
She nodded then yawned “I saw the ending, but think I missed part of it.”
“I learned you have a cute snore.”
<
br /> “Very funny.” She laughed. “I learned I like romantic comedies. Especially Christmas ones.”
“I figured something intense wasn’t going to be a good choice considering that the point was for you to forget everything that’s going on, so I guess we accomplished that.”
“Agreed.” She scooted a few inches away and turned to him. “But to be honest, forgetting things hasn’t exactly been an issue since the accident.”
Griffin frowned, wanting to kick himself for his insensitivity. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”
“It’s okay.” She shot him a smile. “I’m teasing.”
He let out a low chuckle. “You might have lost your memory, but like I said earlier, definitely not your sense of humor.”
“What I really should be saying is thank you.”
“For what?”
“For helping me get my mind off all of this, even if it was just for a couple hours—and even if I fell asleep. I have a feeling that the next few days if not weeks are going to be tough. But in the meantime, I can’t imagine a homier safe house.”
He turned off the TV and the Christmas lights, grabbed the half-empty bowl of popcorn and headed toward the kitchen. “I can’t guarantee that the FBI is going to treat you to a movie and popcorn every night, but while you’re here we can afford to indulge some.”
He stopped midsentence, realizing what he was thinking. For some crazy reason he wished she were staying here—not just until the storm was over, but until he knew she was completely safe. And he wanted to be the one to ensure she stayed safe. But that wasn’t going to happen. She’d only be here until the storm passed and the FBI could get her out, then he’d get back to his normal life.
And reality.
He turned off the kitchen light and started upstairs with her.
“The house is beautiful.” She ran her hand across the wooden banister as they walked up the stairs. “When was it built?”
“My grandfather built the original structure back in the early 1900s, but my father continued to add on. He put in the second story back in the seventies, added a back porch and most recently put in a gun room for safety.”
She glanced at the vaulted door at the end of the hallway. “So he’s a serious hunter?”
“Hunter...collector. He had the vault put in a few months ago. His first grandchild—and any future grandchildren—was his main motivator, though he’s been talking about doing it for years. If you’re interested in hunting, he’s the man people come to. I might be biased, but he and my grandfather are experts on not just hunting but survival and really anything outdoors. He loves this land and knows how to adapt to whatever comes.”
She stood quiet for a minute in front of the guest room.
“You okay?”
“Yeah. I’m fine. Just tired. I love hearing you talk of family, but it makes me wonder about mine.”
“The memories will come.”
She nodded. “I hope so.”
“Do you need anything else?”
“I don’t think so. I have my bag from the agents’ car and your mother helped me get settled.”
“Good. But if you end up needing something—anything at all—during the night, I’m just down the hall.”
“I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
A moment later she turned around and slipped into her room.
He stared at the closed door a few seconds then made a tour of the house, ensuring all the doors and windows were locked. His parents had gone to bed an hour ago, but he had a feeling he wasn’t going to get much sleep.
The wind was still howling outside and the snow continued to lay a thick blanket on the ground, which meant he couldn’t imagine someone coming after her now. Not in this weather. But he still wasn’t going to take any chances. His brother Caden and the ranch hands were already on alert to anything out of the ordinary. And the local sheriff’s department had their deputies on call, as well.
If Jinx did manage to track her down and come after her, they were going to be ready.
He checked the mudroom door then stopped and moved closer to the window. Something shifted outside near the barn and he was sure it wasn’t simply the wind. He grabbed his heavy coat and gloves off the hanging rack, along with a flashlight, then put his service weapon in his holster. If Jinx and his men were foolish enough to try to fight this storm, he was going to make sure they lost.
The wind howled around him as he stepped outside and quickly shut the door behind him. Bitter cold slashed his cheeks, sending shivers up his spine. Steeling his breath, he headed for the barn. Shadows moved in the wind, but that wasn’t what he’d seen. Something—someone was out there.
He held out his weapon as he approached the barn. “Turn around slowly and put your hands on your head.”
He shone his flashlight into the shadows. “Caden?”
His brother stepped up in front of him. “What are you doing out here?”
“Just checking things over one last time. I can’t see those guys coming after her tonight, but saw someone moving around and had to check it out. What are you doing?”
Caden let out a low laugh. “I think we’re both a bit on edge. It hasn’t been that long since Gabby’s and Liam’s lives were in danger, and now this...”
Griffin stepped into the shelter of the barn behind his brother. “I have to admit, this situation has me rattled and they’ve crossed my mind once or twice the past few hours.”
Caden shot him a smile. “Gabby fell in love with Liam during all of that. The same thing could happen to you.”
“Seriously? There’s a killer after the woman I’m protecting, and you’re thinking about matchmaking?” Griffin frowned. “I’m not doing this because I think she’s beautiful or charming. I’m just doing my job.”
“If you say so.”
“Caden, you can’t seriously be going there. I don’t even know her.”
His brother let out a low chuckle. “You know I’m just kidding, though it has been a while since you’ve been in a relationship. I’m just thinking of your happiness. Mom told me Tory’s both beautiful and charming.”
Griffin headed into one of the stalls to check the supply of feed, even though it wasn’t his job.
Caden followed him, stopping in the doorway. “I’m sorry.”
“Forget it. That was a long time ago. I just haven’t found what I’m looking for.”
“What are you looking for?”
He headed into the next stall, wanting to ignore the question. Wanting to ignore the entire topic.
“You’re not exactly one to give relationship advice.”
The four brothers had fought like cats and dogs growing up, but in the end they would have sacrificed anything for each other. Caden and his fiancée had broken off their engagement the night before their wedding. He’d never told Griffin the entire story of what had happened, and Griffin had never pushed. Just like he’d never shared with Caden all the details of losing Lilly.
But none of that mattered right now.
“What I just said crossed the line,” Griffin said.
“Forget it. It’s just that you’ve just seemed...lost lately.”
Griffin stepped out of the stall. “I’m fine. Busy at work and church... There’s nothing to complain about.”
“But that’s not always enough, is it?”
“I just...” He stopped. Wasn’t that the same question he’d been asking himself? What was he looking for?
Satisfied the horses had what they needed for the night, Griffin buttoned the top of his coat. He needed to get back to the house to ensure everything was okay there.
“If things were different, I might not mind getting to know her, but she can’t remember much more than her name, which makes it a bit hard.” He stopped just inside the doorway leading outside and rested his hands on his hips
. “I think the stress of all of this is taking more of a toll than I realized.”
“She’s going to be fine,” Caden said, heading toward the door with him. “She’s got you as her guardian.”
He was cold and tired and needed to get a good night’s sleep if he was going to be able to do his job. “We both should get some sleep.”
“Agreed. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Griffin walked back to the house and made another sweep of the perimeter, knowing he wouldn’t sleep tonight. While the chances of Jinx or his men facing this storm seemed slim, he still wasn’t going to dismiss the possibility. That meant he couldn’t put his guard down.
He glanced up at the window of the room where Tory was sleeping then shifted his gaze toward the shadows in the living room. This time he wasn’t imagining anything. Someone had broken into the house.
FIVE
Tory woke with a start. After hours of not being able to sleep, she’d finally dozed off only to be jerked back awake. It was still dark outside and she had no idea what had startled her. She grabbed her phone to check the time. It was only half past twelve. Maybe she hadn’t been asleep as long as she’d thought.
She crawled out of bed, shoved her feet into her thick slippers and then stopped in front of the window. Snow was falling and had already covered the ground with several inches. Griffin had been right. Jinx might have escaped, but he couldn’t find her here. The authorities would catch him and all this would be over.
At least that’s what she prayed would happen. Somehow she was pretty sure it wasn’t going to be that easy.
If she testified, he’d send someone after her.
If she didn’t testify, he’d go free and probably still send someone after her.
There was no way to win.
A memory flickered in the recesses of her mind as she headed out of her room, but she couldn’t catch it. She’d head downstairs to get a drink then try to go back to sleep. Try to not dwell on the fact that her memories were locked up in a place she couldn’t access.
She’d have to read the additional case files the FBI had sent over and, she hoped, uncover clues to what for now had been lost. But there was something unnerving about trying to find out who you were in a government file.