"I love you very much Brent," I said when we were finally alone in bed that night. "I know that we don't usually talk like this but I wanted to say it. And I wanted you to see that I could both love you and share you, even with my closest female friend."
"I love you too, darling, but I didn't think it was something you really wanted to get into," Brent replied.
"I don't know exactly how to put into words what I want but I know I want you. I guess I want to think of you as my boyfriend and not just a friend with benefits, but I don't want either of us to feel like that has to tie us down."
"That sounds marvelous," he said, sounding genuinely pleased.
"I wanted to see if I could handle not just knowing that you were with other women, but actually seeing it for myself. I've had some jealousy issues in the past and I wanted to know if that would be a problem for me now," I explained honestly.
"I'm really kind of blown away and flattered by all of this. I don't see why we couldn't have an open relationship."
"Then let me ask you this. How would you feel about seeing me getting fucked by another man?"
CHAPTER 17:
People can be awfully silly when it comes to relationships, I guess. Labels probably didn't mean a thing but I really liked the idea of calling Brent my boyfriend and thinking of myself as his girlfriend. We were really good together, in bed or out of bed. And I felt kind of proud of myself for being able to compartmentalize the sex we had into one thing and the sex we had with others into something else. I just wondered whether Brent would be able to do the same.
Brent had agreed to do whatever I wanted without hesitation. That left the question of exactly how the deed would be done. I could fuck some guy while Brent watched, or I could fuck some guy and tape it to show to Brent later, or we could have another threesome, but with two guys this time instead of two girls.
Brent actually seemed to prefer the option where he participated rather than just watched, which surprised me a little. Kate and I had already fooled around, but if we hadn't I don't think either one of us would have been shy about hopping in bed together. Brent was obviously not going to have sex with the other man, unless he had that whole latent homosexual business going on too and decided it was time to do something about it, but in any case he'd be in close proximity to another naked man. As a man that would have totally freaked me out, I think.
I left the choice of the "guest" fucker up to him and I was surprised once again when I discovered who he had picked. It was a good friend of his from work, a guy named Jarvis Fisher. I had met him a few times and we had sort of hung out in Brent's pad before so I knew him rather vaguely. I had always thought that he was attractive, and I was reasonably certain that he was checking me out, which I suspected that Brent could tell, so that all just sort of compounded my surprise.
If I had been forced to be in a three-way with another man and my girlfriend when I was male I think I would have wanted it to be a total stranger. Someone who could do what had to be done and was never seen or heard from again. But Brent was going to have to go to work every day and see a guy that he had seen naked with a hard on. And worse than that he would have seen that hard on stuffed inside of his girlfriend.
We had a quick drink, and a little small talk, then we all headed for Brent's bedroom. The guys just started stripping out of their clothes immediately, which actually put the crazy idea in my head for a moment that Brent really was bi-sexual and that he had chosen Jarvis because they had already been lovers. They just looked so comfortable the way they casually got naked right next to each other without any sign of discomfort or embarrassment.
Then it was my turn to strip and the boys handled that pretty much the way Kate and I had handled it with Brent, except that they weren't kissing or touching each other, they were totally focused on my body.
And speaking of bodies I'd have to say that Jarvis had a pretty damn fine one. Nowhere near as ripped and muscular as some of the guys from work, but really fit and athletic-looking. I might also add that he had a pretty damn fine cock too. Probably about as long as Brent's but definitely a little thicker.
My first thought had been to drop down and start stroking and sucking both of their pricks while we all stood there at the foot of the bed but the boys made the first move. Brent got behind me and started kissing my neck and my back and squeezing my butt while Jarvis stood in front kissing my lips and breasts and fingering my pussy.
I realized that Brent sort of "got" what I was trying to do. I had shared him with one of my best friends and now he was sharing me with one of his. And it was working, as far as I was concerned. Jarvis was attractive and pleasant enough but I had no intention of running off and marrying him even if his cock was thicker than Brent's. And I didn't feel like Brent didn't care about me because he wasn't being possessive. If anything it made me love Brent even more for being so confident, and secure, and understanding, and open-minded.
Having the girlfriend title bestowed upon me was probably pretty irrelevant, but I liked it and I took it seriously. I really felt like I was his woman now, even while I had another man's finger in my cunt. I felt like I could be an asset to him in so many ways that went beyond getting his rocks off. And I guess what I really wanted was a little romance in my life. That feeling of being loved and appreciated.
The feeling I was about to get at the moment was the feeling of being double-penetrated for the first time as Brent and Jarvis took me to the bed and placed me on all fours. I waited to see who would get in front and who would grab the seat in the back. The question was quickly answered as Brent got on his knees in front of me and I felt Jarvis grab my hips as he lined me up to receive his manhood.
As Jarvis slowly let me savor every inch of his rod on the way to the bottom I looked up at Brent and smiled.
"I love you so much baby," I moaned softly.
"And I love you too, darling. Are you a happy girl right now?" Brent asked.
"Not as happy as I'll be in just a moment," I replied as I took Brent's cock in my mouth.
Jarvis was still taking it kind of slow, which worked well for me so that I could support myself on one arm while I had a hand free to stroke Brent's shaft as I blew him. How had I ever gotten to this place? I had two cocks inside me at the same time. A year and a half ago I had my own cock. I really didn't miss it at all anymore. Two cocks inside you beat one hanging down between your legs any day of the week as far as I was concerned. That damn thing had never really done much of anything for me except get me in trouble. That wasn't true at all, of course, but it sort of felt that way sometimes these days. I used to count the hours until I would get my dick back but now I was thinking more about how much longer I would get to keep my pussy.
I was certainly glad that I still had my pussy at the moment as it was getting a good workout; first from Jarvis, and then from Brent when we switched it up a bit. I was lying on my side, with Brent lying on his side behind me while I rested my head on Jarvis's stomach while he fed me his cock. In between sucking Jarvis I would turn over my shoulder and kiss Brent, then it was back to Jarvis and so on.
When Jarvis started to cum in my mouth I of course swallowed every drop. I had decided some time ago that I rather enjoyed cum swallowing, and I didn't like to leave any project unfinished. "Getting the Job Done" was the slogan of the company I worked for, and it was painted on the side of all their trucks. It seemed like a pretty good motto to live by in general so whenever I sucked a cock to completion the job was always done completely, I can assure you of that.
That left Brent sawing away at me from the back so I resumed kissing him while I lightly stroked Jarvis's now softening cock. Jarvis didn't seem in any big hurry to jump up so I just continued to use him as a pillow until Brent...my boyfriend...shot a thick load of jizz into my gash.
I wasn't sure if we were going to call it a night or what we would do to pass the time until the boys were hard again but Brent jumped right in and started licking my pussy, even though it was p
robably dripping with his own cum, and Jarvis sort of scooted over so that he could play with my tits and suck on my nipples.
Sex was so very pleasant, I thought, as if I had just stumbled on some fresh new concept that had never crossed my mind before. Even sex with men was pleasant. Hell, probably even more pleasant much of the time. I could admit that. There was no shame in it. I was proud to be a woman. I had demonstrated my ability to hold my own at my old job, even with my reduced physical strength. And I had been far more responsible with budgeting my money, even though it cost considerably more to be female. On the whole I felt more mature, even if I let myself be silly sometimes just for the fun of it.
If I had known at the start how fun it was going to be being a girl I never would have agonized over the decision so much. To think that I was also getting paid for this was just the icing on the cake. In the mood I was in, in the center of my own personal fleshy layer cake, I figured that I'd probably let them keep their money if they gave me another four years.
That's when the wheels really began to turn.
CHAPTER 18:
"So you're asking whether it's possible to extend the test period?" Dr. Farnum inquired for clarification of my rather rambling question.
"Yeah. I mean just out of curiosity has anyone ever asked to be changed back sooner, or wanted a little more time or whatever?"
"I can't really get into the specifics of anyone else's case study. It's all quite confidential, as I'm sure you can understand and appreciate," said the doctor.
"Okay, let's talk about my case specifically. What if I said that I might not want to change back right away when the four years is up? I asked directly.
"But you're not even half way through the program yet," Dr. Farnum reminded me.
"That's true, but one of the drawbacks of starting an entirely new life, basically cutting ties with the old one, is that you might become attached to your new environment. I really like my apartment, I like my friends, and I like my job. What happens when the time is up? I can't just suddenly turn up as a man one day and tell everybody that I wasn't really the woman they thought I was and that this is the real me. It's hard to make any long range plans. How can you think about the future when you don't have one?"
"You must have considered that from the start," the doctor pointed out.
"But I didn't know anything. I had no idea how this was all going to shake out. I figured it would be kind of crappy but something I could stomach for four years to get that payout at the end. But these first couple of years have been great. Probably the best years of my life in all honesty. And I certainly never imagined that I would fall in love with a man."
"Yes, I can see how that might possibly complicate things," said the doctor with no trace of humor or irony in his voice.
"Yeah, it certainly could. I mean I don't know if this relationship will last another two years, but what if it does? What if could last 20 years, or the rest of my life? But even if it doesn't what if I fall in love with somebody else? I mean I honestly tried to avoid this by being the biggest slut I could be and by trying to keep any sort of romantic attachments from ever creeping into my sex life but damn...I'm in love doctor! I really love this man, and I think he really loves me," I cried, starting to get a little emotional. "What if he asks me to marry him? Not that he has, and maybe he won't, but what if he does?"
"What would you say if he asked that?"
"I'd have to turn him down, obviously. I'd have to make up some bullshit lie, which I don't want to do."
"But if you didn't have any time restriction you would accept his proposal?" asked the doctor.
"I might. I'd seriously consider it," I said earnestly.
"That's very interesting," said the doctor as he made a note in my file.
"I'm glad you think so," I said rather dryly.
"Look, four years was an arbitrary figure chosen after running some computer simulations and based largely on our funding. We've been very pleased with the data we've been collecting, and hopefully we'll continue to receive funding, based on the value of that data to various interested parties but there's no guarantee of that. Personally I would be very interested in following a case like yours over a longer period of time, especially if you were to get married and start a family. I just don't know at this point whether there will be any funds to continue the project beyond the original target date. At the end of the four year period you will definitely get your final payment because it's already been allocated in the budget. Beyond that it's hard to say where the project will be or whether it will even be necessary anymore."
"The money's not that important to me. I'm not saying that I don't want it, but if I get to the point where I'd rather just stay this way indefinitely couldn't I do it on my own dime?" I asked hopefully.
"Just between you, me, and the fencepost we can't force anyone to undergo gender changing surgery against their will. I know you signed a release at the start granting us permission to perform the procedure twice, but performing any sort of surgery without consent, even if you granted it four years ago, would be unethical and illegal. Not to mention the potential public relations nightmare. We're dealing with a very sensitive and politically explosive subject here. Nobody wants negative publicity."
"So it's that simple? I could just say that I didn't want to change back and I wouldn't have to change back?" I said in almost disbelief.
"Simple in a sense, but you have to consider that if the program is not around down the line, and the procedure is not yet available to the public, you would have no way of changing back if you suddenly changed your mind. The whole goal of this project is that people will someday be able to change back and forth with relative ease. Everyone's experience is different and people have been known to have regrets about gender reassignment, no matter what procedure is used. We want to move away from that and create a more flexible option. But that's the future. There's still more testing and governmental hoops to jump through. It could be a long time in the future, if ever. The technology may be available but society has to accept it."
"Wow, you've given me a lot to think about...but also a lot of hope. Honestly I've been trying to follow your advice and go with my feelings and not over-think everything, and that's worked out surprisingly well, but it's hard not to think about the future sometimes."
I shook hands with the doctor and headed for the door when I suddenly turned back with what I imagine was a rather strange look on my face.
"Did you say start a family?"
"Yes, I think I did," the doctor replied, checking his notes.
"You mean like getting pregnant and having a baby kind of starting a family?"
"That is certainly one of the more traditional means of doing so."
"But I thought I couldn't get knocked up."
"Well you can't...become impregnated in your current body configuration. Obviously we wanted to avoid that complication at all costs given the circumstances. But it's a fairly simple procedure to enable you to have the full reproductive capabilities of any other healthy young woman if that was called for," explained the doctor.
"Holy cow," I said as I shook my head and walked out of his office.
CHAPTER 19:
My head was spinning so much over the next few days that I was afraid that it might fly off and smack against the wall. I found myself vacillating between a type of giddy euphoria and paralyzing fear. I started questioning my motives, if not my sanity. I'd been playing with house chips for two years knowing that nothing I did as Jeannie Maddux really mattered because that person would cease to exist at the end of four years. At first I was just relieved that it didn't suck as bad as I thought it would, then I started to see some of the benefits of being female, and then I started having a hard time imagining my life as a man again.
Of course since I couldn't have imagined being happy as a woman two years ago there was no reason to assume that I wouldn't be happy as a man two years from now no matter what I was imagining at the moment. I
had been wrong the first time, I might be wrong again.
I felt like I was up on the high wire in the circus and they had just rolled the net away. I might actually be playing for keeps. Concepts like marriage and motherhood were some pretty serious shit. I never had to think about being a wife or a mother because I didn't think that either of those things were possible. Now I knew that they might both be.
I actually laughed out loud when I pictured myself showing up for work one day in my hardhat and a maternity dress, with my stomach sticking out in front of me. Half the guys there would probably have a panic attack worrying that they might be the father!
Marriage was obviously a big ticket item but there were other potentially big decisions that might pop up along the way. Brent had joked recently that since we were spending so much time together in one apartment or the other we'd probably save a lot of money by just getting one place and sharing it. It was said as joke but it was the kind of joke that made me think that he might be hinting at his interest in living together.
The idea of living with Brent was certainly appealing but I had dismissed it because I thought that living with anyone, male or female, would only makes things even more complicated when the time came for me to go back to my old self. Now the concept was on the table for me. Pretty much everything was on the table for me to consider now and that was what was causing me to flip out so much.
With the time limit on my womanhood I didn't have to worry about making any really big decisions at all. It was frustrating not to have a future as a female, but it also let me off the hook. Knowing that I had the option to remain female indefinitely meant that I could make big decisions and long-range plans, but that also required an even bigger decision.
Did I really want to be a woman indefinitely, if not permanently? Dr. Farnum made it sound like they couldn't force me to change back, but also pointed out that if I went past the four year deadline I might not have the option to change back later. That was scary stuff. I'd only been a woman for two years. Was that really long enough for me to know for certain that I wanted to stay a woman for the rest of my life? My heart said it was, but my brain was telling me to be cautious.
Getting the Job Done Page 7