“Oh good grief, Mom. Dad is probably cursing St. Peter right now for not letting him return to straighten you out.”
“Maybe so. But I’ve joined a camping club and on Saturday, the “Gypsy Coach” and I are on our way to Florida for some sun, sand, and bikinis. Male bikinis, that is.”
The visual made Marianne cringe. “Mom, that’s just gross!”
“Look, Marianne, I understand why you’re changing your life. But I’m not going to sit here and wait to die. I’ve always wanted to do this and nothing short of a heart attack or a stroke will stop me.”
“Mine or yours?” Marianne smarted at her mother.
Brenda gave her a long look. “Funny,” she said, sarcasm stretching the word.
Right now, the heart attack option almost sounded good. “Mom…”
“Thanks for stopping by, but I need to get back to my sale. If you see anything you want, take it.”
“Mom…”
“A moving van is picking up the few things I decided to put in storage. I’m leaving town Saturday and I’ll be stopping in Baton Rouge to meet up with Naughty Nana.”
“Who?”
“That’s her online name. Kind of reminds me of the 70’s when CB handles were the rage.”
Marianne held up her hand, “I don’t want to know this.”
“I thought of going with Bedroom Brenda, but I feared I’d give some eighty-year old a heart attack. I considered Brenda Ball Buster – that had such a nice rhythm – but I settled for Broadway Brenda.”
Marianne gave a sigh of relief, for a moment she’d been concerned. She’d always known her father tamed her mother, but now, Mom had lost her mind. “And what are you and ‘Naughty Nana’ going to do?”
“She’s meeting me in Baton Rouge and we’re driving to Florida.”
Marianne didn’t know what to say. One moment, her mother had sat in her kitchen semi-calm and now she had sold the furniture and became an RV gypsy.
No way was she going to win this skirmish. Better to wave the white flag and walk away unscathed.
“Be careful, Mom. There are predators out there.”
“I may be sixty, but I’m not stupid. Besides, I keep a Colt 45 real close and I’m not afraid to use it.”
“Call me at least twice a week to let me know you’re okay.”
“I’ll try, but I may be too busy.”
“Let me rephrase that. I’ll send the state police looking for you if I don’t receive a call once a week,” Marianne warned. No matter how much they argued, she still loved her mother.
A lady strolled up her hands full of Brenda’s knick-knacks.
“All right, I’ll call you,” Brenda said reluctantly before she turned her attention to her customer.
Marianne stared at her mother, not knowing whether to wish her well or commit her to a mental hospital. What could she do?
Slowly she walked to the car. All these years and still the two of them were like oil and water, never mixing well, never communicating like a normal mother and daughter, and now that problem included her own daughter. Funny, how history repeated itself.
A month later, Katie lay out at the pool near her father’s apartment in her pink string bikini, working on her summer tan.
Her best friend, Emily, lay on the chair next to her.
“Hey, what if we go to that new club on sixth street tonight?” she asked Emily.
“We have a slight problem,” her friend said, without moving in her chair. “We’re slightly underage.”
The only good thing about her parents’ divorce had been her father’s willingness to give her anything she wanted. Shopping had become her past-time and you’d think she was training for an Olympic Competition. A closet full of new clothes, a new Jeep, and all the money she needed to hang with her friends, but no father and no mother.
“Yeah, I know, but we could give it a try, you know slip in somehow. I’m bored. All I’ve done all summer is lay around by the pool and shop.”
“What a life. I’m working my ass off at the supermarket every day and you have the awful privilege of laying out by the pool and spending your father’s money. Gee, what a problem.”
Sure it sounded like a fun life, but every night, her father worked late, which was a big disappointment. She had imagined when it was just the two of them, he would come home early and they would cook dinner together. It was what she’d done with her mother for years. But his job was important and the hours long.
During the day, she pretty much did whatever she wanted. She’d never experienced this kind of freedom and yet she hated it. She felt more alone than if she’d been drifting on the ocean on a life raft.
“It gets monotonous after a while. I’m so bored I even considered calling Matt to see if he wants to try again.”
“Give up trying to lose your virginity already!”
“Don’t you want to lose yours? I bet we’re the only two girls going to college with our hymens intact.”
Katie didn’t like not doing what everyone else was talking about. It was like being the last person to learn how to tie your shoe or ride a bike. She didn’t want to be that kid who came in last.
“Gross,” Emily drawled. “I bet we’re one of the few who don’t have HPV.”
“Gross,” Katie echoed.
“But honest.”
Katie was bored, unhappy, and impatient for classes to start.
Her mother called her at least once a day, but Katie didn’t answer the phone. She wanted her mother to realize what she’d lost and come home. She’d been in Colorado for weeks and while Katie would never admit it, she missed her mom.
Katie gazed up at the hot Texas sun. Her life was slipping away and she was stuck bored out of her mind in this apartment complex with nothing to do. Having sex would at least be taking a step to becoming a woman and an adult. Yet, Emily didn’t seem eager to jump into bed with a guy.
“Are you still planning on waiting until you’re married before you have sex?” Katie asked with disbelief. “That just seems so yesterday.”
“I’m not making any promises, but I’m not searching for some guy to give it away to, either.”
“I just feel so restless.”
Emily sat up and glanced over at her. “You know since your parents’ divorce you’ve gone from being this girl who knew what she wanted and how to get it, to someone who seems so lost.” She paused. “You’re not the first kid whose parents have gotten divorced.”
Her family had been happy right up until her mother decided that being a single woman, going to clubs, and hanging with her divorced friend was more fun. Yes, she said she was going to college, but Katie doubted she’d make it all the way.
“My parents were in love,” Katie shot back, a little too vehemently even to her own ears. “Divorce was not supposed to happen to our family.”
Emily shrugged. “It never is, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen.”
“How would you react if your mother just up and decided to leave your father?”
Emily held up her hand. “You’re talking to the girl whose mother already left her father.”
“Yeah, but you were two years old.”
She shrugged. “At least your father is still around. Mine barely remembers to send me a birthday and Christmas card. He only telephones when someone on his side of the family dies or to let me know he’s being transferred. I haven’t spent time with him since he remarried when I was ten.”
Katie paused for a moment. She’d forgotten that Emily’s father figure was really her step-dad. What if her mother or father got married again? What if one of her parents no longer wanted her in their lives?
She sat up, needing to do something besides bake in the hot Texas sun. She picked up her sunscreen and towel. “Come on, let’s go in the house and make margaritas. We can raid my father’s liquor cabinet. He won’t be home for hours. You could spend the night.”
“I have to go to work at seven.”
“Call in sick. S
ay you have the cramps.”
Emily considered it for a moment. “We haven’t had a party all summer…what if we called some of the crowd from school?”
Katie thought about it for about ten seconds. “Sure, maybe I’ll get lucky.”
Emily shook her head. “You’re obsessed with losing your virginity. Why?”
“Why not?”
Until a month ago, she’d known what path her life was going to take, but now suddenly nothing felt right. At this age, if she were to get married and have children, her mother would be so disappointed in her. But was that what she wanted? At this time everything was changing and nothing felt stable. Nothing.
“And maybe your father would catch you this time. He wouldn’t have been nearly as understanding as your mother.”
“God, no, he wouldn’t. But he’s not going to be home for hours. Pizza, margaritas, and video games. I bought that new game Blaster.”
“And you’re sure your Dad won’t come home?”
Most of her days were spent by the pool and her evenings were spent alone. She tried to remember if he worked this much when they were all together and didn’t know. Had her mother been alone this much?
“Last night, it was after midnight.”
Emily frowned. “Did your father come in this late when he was married to your mother?”
Katie shrugged, not wanting to doubt her father. He was a good man. If he was to blame for her parents’ divorce then everything she'd believed was true about their relationship would be a lie. It couldn’t be true. “He works hard. I was usually in bed before he got home.”
“Have you ever considered that your father might have been cheating on your mother and that’s why they split up?”
Katie felt a rush of anger so intense, she gripped the bottle of the tanning lotion tightly in her trembling hand to keep from hurling it at her friend.
“My father is not a cheater. He would never have stepped out on my mother. He loved her. He was devastated by the divorce and begged my mother not to leave him.”
“That doesn’t mean he’s not an adulterer. Maybe she caught him.”
Katie’s gut tightened and she raised her voice. “My father did not cheat on my mother!” She grabbed her towel from the chair. “Forget the party. I’m not in the mood. It was a sucky idea anyway.”
Emily started packing away her stuff. “I need to go to work. Look, I didn’t mean to make you mad. My mother caught my father with someone else and that’s why she left him. I’m sure your Dad isn’t like mine.”
“I know he’s not like yours.”
Katie turned from her friend. “I’ll call you.”
“Sure.”
She returned to the empty apartment alone. She couldn’t be that wrong about her father, could she? Her mother would have told her if she’d caught him with another woman. But what if she hadn’t?
Chapter 3
Marianne sat in her friend’s apartment in Fort Collins, Colorado. She’d been there a week, sharing Paige’s small, cramped apartment.
“To your new life,” Paige McLane exclaimed, clinking her glass of wine against Marianne’s. “Without the dominatrix and Daniel!”
In some ways, she felt relieved that her daughter had remained in Texas with her dad until she went to college, though Marianne had made Daniel promise no girlfriends around Katie. Not yet. Not until their daughter accepted their divorce. Of course, he’d looked her straight in the eye and told her there was no one but Marianne. Right, and she’d just won the Nigerian Lottery.
“Yeah, well my ex-husband could act out his wild fantasies with other women, just not me. Not that I would paddle him, but…” Marianne took a sip of wine. “Am I really that dull, Paige? I’ve been so focused on raising Katie that now I feel older than dirt and about as interesting. Even my mother is more exciting than me.”
Marianne couldn’t repress a smile. The pain of the divorce had eased with time, though Daniel still called, trying to woo her home. He considered this her rebellious period and assumed she would soon beg to come home. The man indulged in a great fantasy life, not to mention an ego. Marianne was holding tight to her divorce papers.
“Oh, Marianne, honey, you’re just you. You’ve always had that down home, Betty Crocker look going. Daniel has no idea what he’s losing.”
“Betty Crocker?” Marianne exclaimed making a face. “You’re not making me feel younger, Paige. If you’d said Rachel Ray, at least I would have felt young and attractive.”
Paige, with her blonde hair, blue eyes, killer smile, and Barbie doll figure had men practically dripping from her fingers, instead of diamonds. A year after her third marriage ended, Paige was once again in the game, acquiring marks on her bedposts.
They were polar opposites, yet they’d been friends since college.
“Rachael knows how to make even the most boring dish look scrumptious.”
“How about sexy or attractive?” Marianne asked, desperate to hear that a wife and mother could somehow be sexy.
“Rachael? Definitely.”
Well duh, what about me? Marianne wanted to shout as her ego plummeted like the Dow. She pursed her lips and kept her wounded feelings to herself.
“Now, Marianne, nobody is saying that you aren’t sexy.” She paused for a moment, studying Marianne. “It’s just that you’ve got more of a soccer mom appearance.”
“My daughter is enrolled in college.”
“See, you still look young enough to be a soccer mom,” Paige declared, like she was giving her a compliment.
“Right. And the next thing you’re going to recommend is that I get some ‘work’ done.”
“Well…not yet.”
“Paige!” Marianne exclaimed. Her friend looked like she’d stepped out of the pages of a woman’s magazine that catered to young, hip women, while Marianne looked like she should drive a mini-van and had for several years.
“I think you need to expand your horizons. Change your looks. Get a new style and dive into the dating pool.”
“Are you crazy? I haven’t dated for almost twenty years. I wouldn’t know where to begin.” The thought sent a shiver down her spine and almost left her nauseous.
Paige sipped from her wine glass. “You’re a quick learner.”
“My mother is meeting men online,” Marianne confessed, still shocked that she’d been trolling for men to meet and was now traveling across country. The very thought of her mother dating curled her toes. Why, all three of them would be dating, and that made her shiver.
Paige laughed. “Your Mom was always way cooler than most women her age. You could be meeting men online too.”
“No. Tell me how else you meet men in today’s world.”
Marianne really wasn’t interested in dating, but knew her friend thought she was teaching her the single life, so she’d let her for now. But that didn’t mean she was going to seriously pursue a relationship. Her focus had to be on college, her daughter, and her mother – if she could find her mother.
“They’re everywhere.”
In disbelief, Marianne stared at Paige. “I just walk up to a man on the street who isn’t wearing a wedding ring, and say, ‘How about it? Would you like to go out sometime?’”
This new world of college and dating scared Marianne. She really wanted to crawl back into her shell and just focus on learning.
“Yes, women ask men out these days.”
“No, thank you. Besides, I’m just not ready.”
The idea of dating was frightening. Dating meant sex. She’d rather hunt rattlesnakes than show her body to another man, right now.
“Like I said, you need to jump into the dating pool.” Paige raised her brows like a schoolteacher advising a student.
“I know I didn’t help my marriage by focusing more on raising my daughter and not enough on Daniel. Now that she’s eighteen, maybe I do need to add some excitement to my life. To get out and see how the rest of the world lives. I always imagined I would do that with Daniel,
but now…”
Damn him for screwing the plan. She’d done the ‘mommy thing’ and had anticipated the two of them traveling when Katie attended college. She’d imagined cruises, with the two of them dancing in the wee hours of the morning, lingering in bed, and exploring the world together. Instead…he was getting a beating from his dominatrix. And she was starting her life over.
Her daughter was going to college, her mother was traveling the highway, and she felt lost. She had a path, but until school started, she didn’t know what to do with herself.
“Maybe I need to make this time of my life all about me.”
“That’s the spirit,” said Paige, raising her glass of wine in the air. “You need to let yourself go wild.”
Marianne laughed, the three glasses of wine she’d consumed leaving her woozy. “Right,” she drawled. “I’m going to college to learn how to support myself. Somehow it doesn’t sound wild.”
“No, Sweetie. That’s not wild. You need excitement. A night life. Dancing ‘til dawn. Champagne breakfasts and naked daylight.”
A giggle escaped Marianne. Isn’t that what she’d wanted with her husband? Now Paige concluded she should share it with some man she’d yet to meet.
“Let me show you how to experience the single life. Let me put some pizzazz in your style. Just like when we were in college. Carousing the town, searching for men, wild and single.”
“I don’t remember those days.”
“That’s because Daniel and you were too busy checking out the backseat of his Mustang.”
This was a new town, a new day, and a new beginning.
Excitement filled her with the possibilities of the future she could create. From this day forward, she could achieve a new life. Maybe her friend was right. Maybe she should start with an updated look. “Okay, Paige, I’m open for some lifestyle changes, a makeover and maybe even a little partying. Just don’t expect me to have sex with a stranger.”
“Oh honey, you’ll soon be begging for sex and then you’ll wear out some poor man.”
“Yeah, right.” Marianne knew that wasn’t going to happen. Sex was not on the agenda. Not for a long time. She lifted her wine glass to Paige’s. “To new beginnings.”
Secrets, Lies, and Online Dating: Three Generations Learn to Love Again (Women's Fiction) Page 4