The bouncer opened the door for her. “Good night.”
She turned to thank him and cold dread flooded her. Following her through the door was none other than her sexy landlord, Professor Russell.
Her cheeks flamed like a barbecue grill as she realized her landlord had seen her panty display.
He grinned at her. “Red happens to be my favorite color. See you tomorrow, Marianne.”
“Hey, Mom, where do you want this box to go?” Her daughter called out to Marianne as she entered the small garage apartment.
Marianne’s heart gave a little squeeze. When Katie called this morning and said she wanted to visit her, her heart had swelled with love and relief.
Maybe the summer apart had helped her daughter get over the divorce. All she knew was the sight of her gorgeous daughter driving up and offering to help her move had thrilled her. She’d missed her so much.
“There are only three rooms. Just sit the boxes down wherever.”
Katie dumped the box in the middle of the living room. “Only three rooms?” she asked, standing in the middle of the living room, looking around. “Wow, you’ve really come down in the world, Mom.”
Marianne shook her head. Her daughter didn’t understand. Sure the place was small, but it was her place and she already loved it for that reason. But she wanted to mend her relationship with Katie. “Depends on what side of the world you’re looking from. This is all the room that I need.”
Tonight she’d spend her first night alone in her very own place and she was excited. Paige had not returned home until this morning and Marianne had felt like she cramped her friend’s style.
“Yeah, but it’s so small. Dad’s new place has a hot tub and a pool.”
And no lack of pool bunnies, she wanted to retort.
“Your father is not a full-time student either,” Marianne responded, checking the kitchen cabinets to make sure that they were lined with paper.
“You know he would take you back,” her daughter said softly.
Marianne glanced over at Katie, her stomach tight with apprehension. She didn’t want to spend the day arguing with her daughter, but she had to remain firm. “But that’s not what I want.”
Katie frowned and opened a box of dishes. “So what if I want to stay the night? Where am I going to sleep? And what about next summer? Where will I go?”
“We’ll make do. You can sleep with me or take the couch. You’re always welcome here, but I thought you would want to go back to Texas to see your Dad.”
She doubted that Katie would ever want to move in with her, but she had a place if wanted to stay here.
“I don’t know. Dad’s not home very much. It was kind of lonely being there all by myself. Has he always worked a lot?”
Marianne stared at her daughter, unsure how much to tell her, and decided to be honest. “Not when we were first married. When you were about ten, things started to change. He got a big promotion at work. He began to travel a lot and worked late a lot of nights.”
Even then she’d had suspicions that he was cheating on her, but just never sought out the truth. Not until she came down with the first STD.
“Remind me when I get married to make sure the guy is going to be around.”
What could she say? Most marriages started out happy until life and work intruded.
“Were you terribly disappointed your Dad didn’t come up with you to college?”
Katie didn’t say anything for a moment. Finally, she frowned. “Yeah, I was. Everyone’s family was there but mine.”
“Oh, Katie, I’m sorry. I would have come if you asked me to.”
Marianne felt bad, but she’d waited until her daughter reached out to her. She would always be here for Katie, but Marianne knew she’d needed time to heal from the divorce. She’d tried to give her some space.
“I know, but Dad’s coming to visit me for parent’s day. That’s coming up in two weeks. I thought that maybe we could all go to dinner.”
Marianne’s insides tightened. The thought of sitting across the table from Daniel was enough to make her lose her appetite. She had to put a stop to Katie’s manipulation to get her parents back together.
“No, thanks. I think you should spend that time with your Dad.”
Katie looked disappointed at her mother’s rejection of her offer, but said nothing.
“Are you still thinking about marketing as your major?”
She shrugged. “I don't know. I don’t even know if I like college.”
“You’ve had a traumatic year. We both have. Please don't make any life changing decisions for a while. Just get through the next six months and then look around and see what you want to do.”
Katie frowned. “You made this a traumatic year. Part of me just wants to jump into my Jeep and drive as far as it will take me.”
Sighing Marianne put her arm around her daughter wanting to comfort her. “I’m sorry. But I couldn't stay married to your father any longer.”
She walked out of her hug. “What if I just got married and had a family of my own?”
Marianne’s heart skipped a beat and she tried not to panic. “You could do that. You're old enough to make that decision. But you would have a really tough time. No college degree. You’d have to find a menial paying job and put the child in daycare. Is that what you want?”
“Right now, I don't know what I want. Nothing feels right.”
Maybe it would have been better if she'd stayed with Daniel, if only so her daughter wouldn't be going through this, but how could Marianne put up with more of his cheating? And sooner or later Katie would have learned the truth. At least this way, she was protecting her from discovering her father was a loser. Or at least she hoped she was.
“It will get better, Katie. I’m sorry, but the marriage had to end.”
“Why?” Katie asked.
“We'd grown apart. We had different interests and we no longer fit each other’s needs.”
Katie frowned and shook her head. “That's not the way I remember our family."
That was because Marianne had sheltered her for years from the way her father was, and now that was coming back to haunt her.
Marianne hurriedly changed the subject. “Come on, let’s get another load of boxes from the car.”
They hurried down the stairs and were standing at the trunk when her landlord roared into the driveway on his sleek Harley. He gave a quick wave and drove the bike into the garage. Katie’s eyes widened at the man on the Harley.
Marianne dove into the trunk of her car, lifting a box and handing it to her daughter. She knew the time would come when she’d have to face her landlord again, but not now, not here with her daughter. Not with her panty display at the club last night unspoken between them.
“Cool bike.” Katie said, eyeing the professor.
“That’s my landlord, Professor Russell.”
And yes, he was hot. Very hot, but she didn’t want to think of him in that way. Her focus was on finishing school, not finding a man.
“Your landlord drives a motorcycle? Way cool, Mom. Can I ask him for a ride?”
“Not today. We’ve got at least two more loads of boxes to get out of storage and then we have to wait for the furniture to be delivered.”
Luke took off his helmet and ran his hand through his dark brown hair. His shirt stretched across his chest, outlining his six-pack. He dropped the keys to the bike in his pocket.
“Wow! I wish my professors were hunks like him.”
God, her daughter was saying the thoughts that filled Marianne’s mind. “Why don’t you take that box up and I’ll bring this big one.”
“Okay.” Katie lifted the smaller box and headed toward the stairs.
Marianne heard his boots before she saw him.
“Hi. Let me get that for you,” Luke took the oversized box out of her hands.
“Thanks.” She glanced at him an awkward silence. This big, hunky, good-looking guy had seen her underwear. She pulled
one silly stunt in a bar and he witnessed her bizarre behavior.
“Did you have a good time last night at the Monkey Library?”
“Yes,” she said, in a clipped voice. Why did she feel ashamed? She had enjoyed herself, she’d wanted to try new experiences, and it wasn’t like anyone had seen her naked. She took a deep breath, resolved to squelch that unwanted feeling.
“Good,” he laughed. “I admit I would never have guessed red panties. I figured you more of a pink lady.”
At least he didn’t say white granny underwear. They walked up the stairs. “Pink is Friday’s color.”
She swung open the door to the apartment for him and they stepped in. A quick glance at Katie confirmed her worst fear.
Katie stared at her mother, her mouth open, and her eyes wide in stunned disbelief. Marianne noticed the open window and realized…she’d heard every word.
Luke dropped the box in the living room. “I hope this is where you wanted it.”
“That’s fine. Professor Russell, I’d like to introduce you to my daughter, Katie. She’s attending the University of Colorado at Boulder this semester.”
“Nice to meet you. Boulder has a great university.”
Katie shook his hand politely, but gazed at him like he was the evil archangel about to steal her mother away. She stared at Marianne like she was seeing her for the first time as a woman and not just a mom.
“How many more boxes do you have?” Luke asked, ignoring Katie’s cold reception.
“I think there is one more load this trip.”
“I’ll help you bring them up.”
Marianne dropped her box down to the floor and hurried out the front door, careful to avoid looking at Katie. She didn’t want to deal with her right now. Later, once the professor was gone, she would explain.
Luke followed her out to the car. “Did I say something to offend your daughter?”
Marianne laughed the sound anxious to her own ears. “She’s still dealing with the divorce.”
And now the fact that she’d shown her underwear in a bar. That was an image a daughter didn’t want to have of her mother.
“Divorce is tough on kids of any age. I was fortunate that I didn’t have any children during my marriage. I would have liked to have had kids, but we could never find the right time.”
She handed him one of the last boxes out of the trunk of the car. “I only have Katie, and she hasn’t given up on getting her parents back together, though a snowstorm in hell has a better chance.”
There were so many issues with Katie, and now she’d just added two more: her gorgeous landlord and exposing her underwear. How could she explain to her daughter that neither were life threatening when everything at Katie’s age seemed so final and dramatic?
Luke smiled knowingly and headed toward the apartment. He walked into the space and set the box on the floor.
“If you need help unloading the next carload, just knock on the door. I should be home the rest of the day.” He glanced at Katie who leaned against the kitchen counter with her arms crossed and a mutinous expression on her face. “Nice to meet you Katie, and good luck at school.”
“Thanks,” she replied, her voice cold.
What happened to the young girl who had been commenting on the professor’s good looks? Who wanted to ride his bike?
Marianne walked him to the door. “Thanks for your help.”
“No problem.” He shut the portal and she could hear his footsteps on the stairs.
A long moment of silence stretched in the apartment. Marianne decided she was not going to bring up the elephant in the room. If Katie had heard anything, she was going to have to start this conversation.
“You’re sleeping with your landlord?”
“What? Of course not!”
Why in the world did Katie think her mother was having sex with her landlord? Sure he was a gorgeous temptation, but ice cream was her only temptation at night.
“Then how did he know the color of your underwear?” her daughter demanded.
Marianne took a deep breath. How did you explain this to your teenage daughter and then encourage her not to follow your example?
“Paige and I went to the bar everyone on campus goes to and they had a contest where people guessed the color of your underwear. If they were wrong, then they had to donate money to a local charity. Professor Russell happened to be there.”
Marianne refused to feel guilty. She should have told her it was none of her business.
“Mom, I can’t believe you would show your underwear to a bunch of drunk college boys. Paige put you up to it didn’t she?” Katie remarked, anger in her voice.
“Paige was with me, but I’m quite capable of making my own decisions.” Did her daughter see her as spineless? But then again, didn’t her father and even Marianne’s own mother see her as weak?
“Dad said she would get you into trouble, but I told him not to worry. After everything that you’ve taught me, you would never do anything silly. Boy, was I wrong.”
At eighteen Katie, could win an Oscar for best dramatic performance.
Marianne stopped and stared at her daughter. “I made the decision, and honestly, I didn’t think anyone would choose me. I was quite surprised when they did.”
“You were an easy mark, mother. The guys probably thought they could guess your underwear with no problem and I’m sure they did.”
A sliver of annoyance shivered down Marianne’s spine. Even her daughter thought, like her ex-husband, that she was predictable and boring. Did anyone realize that she was a loving human being who enjoyed a sexual side? Just because she was forty didn’t mean she’d dried up.
“As a matter of fact, they had to donate money to the charity.” Marianne declared to her daughter.
“Were you drunk?”
“Of course not!” Marianne exclaimed. “I left and drove home not long after the contest.”
Katie didn’t say anything, though her brow was furrowed deep in thought.
“Is Dad the only man you’ve ever slept with?” she asked, shocking Marianne.
“Katie!”
“Well, I just wondered. I mean you’re divorced. You’re going to college. You’re showing guys your underwear. I’m worried that you’re having some kind of mid-life crisis.”
Yes, Marianne was having a crisis. One that should have happened years ago after the first time that Daniel brought her home a disease.
“I’m not having a mid-life crisis and who I’ve slept with is none of your business.”
“Maybe not. But college life is different from when you attended. Everyone is sleeping with everyone else. Girls aren’t waiting any longer until they’re married. It’s not like when you were younger, Mom.”
Why did every generation think they were different? When she’d gone to college, some of the girls were having sex and some were not. When would it become about personal choice and not what you were being told was happening?
“Just because everyone else is sleeping around, doesn’t mean that you and I have to sleep around,” Marianne said, placing dishes in the cupboard.
“No, but look at your life. With Dad, you had a nice house, you didn’t work, and you didn’t have to worry about catching an STD from someone.”
It was all Marianne could do to keep from laughing. She didn’t have to worry about catching an STD! Damn it, he’d given her one. She’d worried every time she had sex with Daniel that she was subjecting herself to catching something. In fact, the last time she found out he was cheating on her, she’d quit sleeping with him and gone to the doctor.
But she couldn’t tell her daughter and ruin Katie’s image of her father. Even if she wanted to tell Katie the facts, now was not the time. Her daughter might hate her for being the one to destroy Katie’s beliefs about her father. It was best to wait. Daniel would eventually reveal his true nature to his daughter and then Marianne would be there for Katie when she learned the truth.
Marianne looked at the
daughter she loved with all her heart and decided maybe she needed to try a new approach. “What about you? You’re a young, beautiful woman just entering college. Are you going to give it away?”
“Mom! That is none of your business.”
“Ditto, kid.”
Silent, Katie stared at her and then slowly nodded her head. “Okay, Mom, but be careful. Dad would not understand if he found out you slept with someone besides him.”
Marianne didn’t know when her daughter was going to get a clue, but she was going to have to start being blunt.
“Katie, honey, it doesn’t matter what your father thinks. We’re not getting back together. This is not a phase I’m going through. I’m not going to wake up and change my mind. Listen carefully. Your father and I are done.”
Her daughter frowned and shook her head as if she couldn’t comprehend the idea of her mother without her father. “Just watch out for Professor Russell. If he likes your underwear, then he may want to try to get into them.”
Marianne picked up a small pillow and threw it at her daughter, who caught it with a giggle. “Please. I’m almost forty, and as for the professor, he’s not my type.”
“Yeah, well if he’s not your type and daddy’s not your type, what kind of man are you looking for?”
Marianne thought for a moment. She had no idea what kind of man she wanted to marry. Only that she required he be faithful. “I don’t know. But I have years to find out. Now come on, Katie-bug, let’s go get another load of boxes before it gets dark.”
“Damn,” Brenda said as she burned the end of her finger on a log she was pushing into the flames of the campfire. She could cook the steaks inside on the stove, but nothing tasted better than grilled steaks over a fire.
Sandy had gone to Dick’s camp to invite the boys to dinner.
Florida was great this time of year and she had enjoyed the trip from Texas to Florida with stops along the way, but she was beginning to get homesick. Only she no longer had a home. She wanted to see Marianne and Katie. Sure, she and Marianne had cryptic phone conversations at least once a week, but so far neither one was backing down.
If George had been alive, he would have told her she was acting crazy and maybe she was. Marianne was her only daughter and yet the hurt of her decision to leave had barely dimmed. In years past, Brenda knew she’d let life come between them, choosing the Bridge Club and her friends over Marianne and Katie.
Secrets, Lies, and Online Dating: Three Generations Learn to Love Again (Women's Fiction) Page 7