I blew out a big breath. I wanted one frigging night with my kid, and now I needed to find someone to watch him. God, how did Natalie do this by herself all those years?
“Listen to me, Billy. Do not let Penny out of your sight. Do you hear me? I need to find someone to watch Quinn, and I’ll be right there.”
I pushed END CALL before he could respond, and then walked across the yard to see if Lila was home. She could watch Quinn. Knowing her, she’d love it.
But she wasn’t there.
I was definitely not calling Natalie’s mom. That woman scared me, resented the air I breathed, and if I showed her how incapable I was, it would become worse.
I had no one else to call other than Trish. Crap, that girl was spending more time with my son than anyone else. Seeing as how her place was the size of a matchbox, I invited the sitter to come to my house, spread out, and have some fun with my boy.
Then came the hard part. Explaining—lying—to Quinn about why I had to run.
AGAINST MY better judgment, I took my bike, wanting to speed over to the Tunnel as fast as I could. It was summer and as I throttled the bike forward, the heat rose from the pavement, circling around me, fueling my own rising temperature. There wasn’t even a welcome breeze as I pushed on faster. Arriving at the club in one piece was a small miracle, and I scolded myself for not bringing the SUV, but now I had much bigger problems than my transportation.
After flying around back and leaning the bike up, I walked quickly toward the front where Mike was pacing by the edge of the sidewalk.
“Mike, what the hell are you doing? Penny’s in there, harassing Nat,” I yelled at him.
He looked up, dazed, confused. “What did you just say?”
“I said, Penelope—you know, red hair, the source of all my recent problems? She’s inside the club, starting trouble with Natalie. What the hell are you doing out here?”
He stood still, staring at the ground as he said, “Shit, Ash. I didn’t know.” He let out a long sigh and kept going, looking up at me to say, “We have another problem on our hands. Petey was here.”
“Yeah, I heard that from Billy, who called shitting himself, not knowing what the fuck to do with Penny. I’ll have to worry about Pete later, Mike. Natalie’s my first priority.”
I started to walk toward the back entrance of the club when Mike caught up with me, grabbing my shoulder, stopping me.
“Pete’s only got your best interest at heart, Ash. You have to know that. He’s a good dude. Your dad was here with him, looking for you. He’s sick of waiting. He wants to talk with you about the connection. Petey told him you have a son. I guess he heard from one of the girls, and decided to share that info with your father.”
“Christ!” I screamed. “I can’t catch a break today. First, I try for the millionth time to do something nice for Nat, only to be fucking rejected. Then I figure I might as well spend the night with my son, which gets interrupted by Penny and her theatrics. And now this shit. You know what? I know the damn connection—Petey’s my brother. Half brother, and he obviously had our dad when I didn’t, so he can keep him now. I’m trying to make a go of the only relationship with family I may ever get—Quinn.”
I pulled past my currently ineffective head of security and stomped toward the back door, trying to salvage what might be left of my relationship with the mother of my son, Mike hot on my tail. Fucker grabbed me again.
“What the hell, Mike? Why do you keep stopping me from getting any shit done?”
He shook his head like he was clearing cobwebs from his brain. “What did you say? You were spending the night with your son? Where the fuck’s he now? At the sitter’s?”
“Well, I didn’t leave him alone, shitface. I may not know a shit ton about parenting, but I didn’t just leave my kid and run out. I got Trish to come over and stay with him until I get back. He’s sleeping over for the first time, and I want to make this quick so I don’t miss the whole night.”
“Fuck!” Mike roared. “That’s where Petey and your asshole father were heading to find you. I was convinced they’d find an empty house. Tried to talk them out of it, but your old man’s a stubborn one, and I let him go, thinking you were on your way in to work. How was I to know your goddamn kid would be there?”
I smacked my hand into the back door, the sound of my skin hitting the steel reverberating into the night. It was a thunderous, loud crack, like the one silently making its way down the middle of my chest.
“God-fucking-damn it. Come on, let’s get rid of Penny and then you have to drive me home. I already almost wrecked my bike once tonight.” I gripped my hair tight as I walked through the door, pain reverberating through my scalp, bleeding into the constant hum of anxiety pumping from my heart.
Rushing up the stairs to my office, I did my best to rid myself and the club of Penny before hurrying the hell back out, hopefully with Nat being none the wiser about who her son was probably meeting as I scurried around the Tunnel, fixing the current redheaded mess.
What Really Happens in the Back Room
Natalie
MY ASS was in some suit’s face in the back room. He was sitting up against the dark blue banquette, trying to remain wrinkle-free in his designer clothes, and I was leaning over, hands on the floor, placing my crack right at eye level, bouncing my goods at his nose. I could smell sex on the guy; he was primed and ready to go. Dude would probably pay me the big bucks to head back to his place and simply tug on his dick. But this wasn’t the Leop or the Kitty, and Ash would freak the fuck out if he knew I was even thinking in those terms.
I wouldn’t do it, though. There was Quinn to think about, and I had personal limits. So I just continued to dance for him, working him into a full-on lather, hoping he would find a nice, willing, friendly woman when he went back to his hotel. Or maybe he had a wife waiting at home, and he was simply hanging at the Tunnel getting worked up, living out a fantasy.
Every so often, my gaze wandered to the security detail, making sure they did and didn’t have eyes on me. One eye would be fine; no need to have two or four or six eyeballs on me. I only needed a tiny bit of protection, but definitely required a wide range of space. Noticing Billy was back, I figured he dealt with Penny, because he knew I certainly wasn’t heading back out onto the main floor until she was gone.
Bringing my full attention back to Mr. Designer Duds, I flipped around, front to front, and slithered along his body. It was hard; obviously he worked out, probably at a gym with some fancy trainer, but he had zero character. No laugh lines around his bland eyes, soft hands instead of rough, heavy cologne masking his sweaty smell. He was just too clean and smooth and prissy for me, but he wasn’t paying for my opinion.
Just my tits and ass.
And the guy was paying big-time. I was a top biller at the club now that I was back in town, five hundred bucks per half hour in the back to be paid to the club, not including tips, which were slipped directly to me. With the man spread in front of me, my wad of cash was growing and I had mentally gone to where I went when I danced—no-man’s-land, a place where my thoughts ceased to exist.
With my mind totally devoid of anything significant other than the beat of the music and dollar bills, I remained mentally distant while my body did not.
Allowing my tongue to come out and lick my lips, I stared down my night’s prey, also known as this week’s meal ticket. When I lifted my knee and brushed it along his inner thigh, I felt a shiver run through the man in front of me, his erection visible now through his expensive suit. He shifted, adjusted, and I kept slinking around his firm body.
His hand lifted, caressed the side of my breast. That was okay. Then he was quick and moved in to tug on my piercing. I was quicker and lifted my hand, gently removing his, and wagged my finger at him.
He wrestled with my hand a bit, trying to make his way back to my nipple ring. Obviously, the outlines of the piercings were doing it for the guy. I leaned back, brought my feet to the floor, and stood.r />
“I think we’re done for the night.” Like I’d been telling everyone for months, I knew how to handle myself in the back room.
“Wait. I’m sorry, Nataleigh. Let’s stay and play,” he begged.
“Sorry, buddy. Time’s up. Time for my break, anyway.”
I started moving out, making sure one of the young buck bouncers had stepped in to get payment, before clearing the curtain separating the back of the club from the front.
I should have stayed back with Mr. Nipple Piercing Lover because as soon as I hit the floor, I ran smack into Penny…with Asher hustling right behind her.
“Penny, get the hell over here,” I heard him yell.
I couldn’t worry about the redheaded slut at the moment because like a lightning bolt in the dark sky, thoughts of Quinn burst through me. Shoving Penny to the side, I said not so quietly, “Asher, where the fuck is my son?”
“He’s fine, Natalie. I’m his father, like I keep telling you, I’m not going to do anything to hurt him. Get that through your head already,” the asshole said as he put his arm around Penelope and led her to the back door.
The man didn’t offer any other explanation of where he was going or what he was doing. Just walked away with his arm and gorgeous bicep slung around my arch enemy. That was it. My night had gone to shit, and it was basically my fault. I knew I was pushing Asher away and eventually, I would get what I deserved. Nothing.
Walking back to my dressing room, I refused to cry, only violent anger rising in my gut over my loss of control when it came to Quinn. He was my son. I had raised him alone for close to a decade and didn’t want any of this world for him. Now, not only did I not know where he was or who he was with, but he might even be up in Asher’s office.
With vengeance in my heart and a violent pounding in my head, I made my way to the stairs to the second floor. On my way, I held my head up high, shook my ass, and smiled at the clientele. I needed them and couldn’t afford to lay my problems on them.
Bursting through the door without knocking, I found Mike alone in the office, standing behind Asher’s enormous desk.
“Natalie, what’s wrong?” he asked as I made my way through the door, looking wildly in every corner for any small clue or remnant of my son.
“Where’s Quinn? I just saw Asher chasing after his fair redheaded lady of the night, and he was supposed to be spending the night with our son.”
Mike stood still, hands flat on the desk, and said, “He’s fine, Nat. Ash got a sitter…and he wasn’t—” when his phone started blaring.
“He wasn’t what, Mike?” I asked, but the stubborn jerk held up a finger and answered his phone.
“Li—you home? Get my message?”
He listened quietly to Lila as he turned away from the desk, resting his butt on the edge, his face now toward the back wall, making it impossible for me to read.
“Uh-huh,” he said. “Yeah… Right, do that… Yep, I’m coming now. Leaving in five.”
After a few rounds of cracking his neck, Mike turned once again and ended the call, saying, “I gotta go, Nat. Wait here. Asher was trying to get rid of Penny, not chase after her. I’ll send him up.”
As if I was going to do what he said. “No way, Mike. I’m leaving, going to get my boy. I guess Asher dropped him at Trish’s after making a big deal of him not wanting him to be with a sitter. God, he’s a shit.”
“Stop, Natalie. Asher only left because Billy called him to let him know Penny was here bugging you. When are you going to get it through your head that you’re his first priority?”
With that, the big, scary bouncer stormed out of the office, and I went down to my dressing room with my tail between my legs.
After cleaning up, removing my makeup, slipping on my street clothes, and placing my hamsa back on my neck, I decided I needed to give Asher the benefit of the doubt. I would lose my son if I didn’t stop pushing his father away. Throwing my tiny outfit from the evening in my dry-cleaning hamper, I grabbed my bag and headed toward the back door.
As soon as I opened my dressing room door, Billy was there to hand me my take. I’d been so preoccupied, I forgot about my ever-present shadow and my money.
“Thanks, Billy. And thanks for looking out for me.”
I placed a small kiss on his cheek, which kind of shocked the guy, but I was turning over a new leaf. I wasn’t going to be the jaded, emotionally stunted stripper anymore.
Kicking the back door open, I was ready to live my life.
Monkey in the Middle
Asher
GOD, PENNY was really such a queen bitch. It took me forever to get rid of her. She was absolutely belligerent; she kept suggesting that I pay Nat off and shack up with her instead. Whining in my ear about how I didn’t need the responsibility of a kid. Hanging on my shoulder, promising to bring Larken back.
As if that were enticing?
All these years I’d known Penelope, I had always thought she was unbreakable. Sadly, I was the one to do exactly that. I broke her. She was shattered, her feelings scattered throughout my club as she laid them out for me. It was all me. I should have seen this coming, she was always too eager to do what I wanted, she inserted herself inside the Tunnel family, she made a point of knowing Natalie’s comings and goings. The writing had been on the wall for a long time, but my head was too fragmented to put it all together.
But I didn’t have time to think about that shit because now Mike was driving me to my house. The guy wanted to go in without me, handle my problems for me. He said Natalie was inside my office waiting for me, but she would have to continue to wait. Needing to deal with this on my own, I would explain to Natalie when it was over, and make it right if I still could.
Shit, we’d already been to hell and back. If Natalie and I couldn’t get over this, then fuck it all to hell.
When the car lurched to a stop in front of my place, I jumped out before Mike put the thing in park and ran up the driveway, which was blocked by a silver sedan. They even had the nerve to park in my driveway.
I walked right in the front door, which was unlocked, and ran toward the noise in the kitchen. Lila was trying to reason with the man who’d played a hand in creating my life. He was irate, yelling in her face, saying she had no right to keep him from his grandson. She continued to quietly remind him that she had no idea who he was.
Trish had set up camp in the corridor between the kitchen and the back hallway. I had to guess Quinn was upstairs. Where the fuck was Petey?
“Ho!” I shouted. “Hold up!”
I faced the man with the same silver eyes as mine and said, “Step back from Lila. She has more right than you to be here, and you have absolutely no right to speak for my son. Now. Do it now.”
He did.
I walked forward, approaching the person who claimed to be my father. I didn’t need him to tell me he was my long-lost dad that day I bumped into him. Not only were our eyes the same, but I was built just like him. Although his had grayed a little, he also had wild and unruly blond hair. In a lineup, anyone would determine that he, Quinn, and me were three generations of the same family.
As for the man who seemed to be missing at the moment—Petey—it also didn’t take me long to deduce he was my brother from another mother. It all started to make sense. How often he was told he looked like a mini-Asher; it had been almost annoying at times. Now, I knew why.
I caught my breath, my lungs burning from all the yelling I was doing between Penny and my father.
With me on the scene, Lila moved to comfort Trish, who was a holy mess, obviously oblivious to all the family politics at play. Lila smoothed her hand down the girl’s back, comforting, whispering in her ear what she knew of the situation.
Turning to the older man, I spoke quietly, mindful my son was in the house. “Listen, I don’t know what you’re doing here, but you don’t get to show up here unannounced. It’s not right. I don’t even know your name,” I said while holding my hand extended to the door.
r /> “Nash. It’s Nash. Same last name as you. Peterson,” he said, but stubbornly didn’t make a move to leave.
“Okay, this is crazy. We’re not going to sit here and chat, have coffee talk, fucking get to know each other. You’re several decades late for that type of shit.” Once again, I pointed to the front hallway.
The old man shook his head. “I’m not going. I know I was wrong, fucked in the head, but this whole thing with Pete had me tied in knots. What if that had been you with a crushed leg? Who would be your emergency contact?” he asked as he stepped toward me.
I backed away and put my hand out, motioning for him to stop. “Well, definitely not you.”
Regret disguised as frustration sparked across the old man’s face.
“Speaking of Petey,” I said, “where the hell is he?”
“He’s waiting to deal with your son’s mother. Talk some sense into her,” my father said with confidence, like he was in control of everything.
“What?” I roared into the night, my kitchen vibrating with the power of my voice, glasses clinking inside the cabinets. I felt a wave of violence overcoming me, pulling me under, like I had never experienced before. How dare these fucks take over my life?
We were all cut off by the shrill of Trish’s cell phone. With a shaky hand, she pulled the phone from her back pocket and glanced at it, then looked up at me. “It’s Natalie.”
I shook my head. “You have to get it. Make her understand that I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. Tell her Quinn is fine,” I instructed her, more for my own well-being. Quinn wasn’t just fine. He was up in a bedroom that he only first started calling his own today, and I knew better than anyone how hard it was to claim a new space as a young boy.
“Nat?” Trish said after answering the call.
“Where are you?” I heard my woman yell through the phone.
Unfortunately, before Trish could answer, I caught a glimpse of my son rounding the stairs and pushing his way past Lila. He grabbed the phone and spoke before anyone could stop him.
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