“Okay, let’s get this over with,” he says when he comes back. “I don’t have much time. Everything in New York seems to be falling apart without me.”
My heart skips a beat. I thought that I would have time to explain, to make my case. I glance over at Thurston, who shrugs his shoulders lightly. Someone turns on the camera. They place me under oath.
“I’ve reviewed your case,” Mann says, finally looking up at me from the file. “Carefully.”
“Okay,” I mumble. Thurston nudges me. I’m supposed to be more forceful. Confident. We had talked about this in our prep. But right now I just feel meek and scared.
“If you had reviewed my file, then you should be well aware of the fact that what happened at my apartment was pure self-defense,” I say, sitting up straight. The words escape my lips just as we had practiced them.
“Yeah, yeah,” Mann mumbles. “But you see here, there’s the issue of your online journal where you clearly state that you want to kill Blake.”
“Yes, so what?” I say, shrugging my shoulders. I’m trembling inside, but on the outside I’m calm and collected. Arrogant even. I’m challenging his authority with my gaze.
“You don’t think that’s a little strange?”
“Not at all. That man ruined my husband’s business. He got him fired. He almost forced himself on me, nearly raping me. And then he attacked my husband and put him in a coma, Mr. Mann,” I say. “I’ve had a lot of reasons to want him dead and I vented about that in my private online journal.”
“Don’t you think that’s just a little bit convenient though?”
“Not at all.” I shrug. Nonchalance is my motto. “I’m a writer, as I’m sure you know. We all express ourselves in different ways. I express myself in my writing. That’s all I was doing.”
“I see.”
“I wasn’t planning anything, if that’s what you are insinuating. My only plan was to never see him again and to get him out of our lives forever. But I never wanted to kill him. And then he came into my apartment and attacked me. I did what anyone in my position would do.”
Chapter 25 - Ellie
When I walk out…
Time seems to stand still in this conference room. Every moment is carefully tracked and monitored. Not by any of them, but by me. Every moment lasts a lifetime. Mr. Mann looks me up and down, narrowing his eyes.
“I see that you are not fully convinced,” I say.
“I have my reservations.”
I take a deep breath. I have to try harder. I have to make him understand.
“I killed him with a pen, Mr. Mann.” My cool and collected nature is starting to fade away.
“Yes, it appears as though you did.”
“Well, there are a lot more powerful weapons out there than pens. And if I were planning something like that, I certainly wouldn’t use something like that when he had a gun.”
Mr. Mann considers this for a moment, as if he hadn’t thought about this before. Of course, he did. I know it. We all know it. Nothing new is going to be revealed in this meeting. The only reason we are all here is for him to evaluate me. If he wants to take this to trial then I have to be unsympathetic. A porn-writing temptress as my first attorney saw me. So, it’s my job to persuade him that I am not this person at all and that the jury will not see me this way.
“Mr. Mann, what can I do?” I ask after a moment of silence.
“What do you mean?”
“What can I do to convince you that I didn’t do this on purpose? That I was just acting in self-defense?”
Mr. Mann turns his head toward Detective Egan. They talk in hushed tones. We all wait.
“Mr. Mann,” Thurston says after waiting for one of them to say something for a while without so much as a word. “What we have here is a young woman who was attacked by a man with a gun. A man who had it out for her husband and her. He was unstable. She did what anyone in her position would do.”
“I’m sorry, but given the nature of the journals that we found, I am not so sure that it’s that simple,” he says after a moment.
My heart sinks. I thought that we were making progress. I thought that this might finally come to an end.
“Ellie, may I speak frankly?” Mr. Mann says.
Just as I nod, wetness spreads down my legs. I get a shooting pain in my back. Oh my god. No. What’s happening? I try to stay calm. It’s going to be okay, I say to myself. Everything’s going to be okay. I just have to get through this.
“I know that you had your issues with the victim, but the details of your online entries do not make you a very sympathetic defendant. And that’s before I even tell the jury what you do for a living.”
“I didn’t plan on this,” I say, my voice going up at the end. I’m getting desperate. I’m breaking character. But I’m going into labor and my back is hurting like the worst cramps of my life.
“And what exactly is it that I do for a living that’s so horrible?” I ask. “I write stories about love. Yes, they have sex in them. So, what? Real life has sex and there’s nothing offensive about two people in love expressing that love physically.”
“I’m not sure that’s the way the jury will think about it.”
I’ve had enough. I stand up.
“This interview is not over,” Mr. Mann says adamantly.
“You don’t think I’m sympathetic, Mr. Mann? I am a newlywed whose fiancé was attacked and put into a coma by the same guy who attacked me. He had a gun and I had a pen. That’s all. I could’ve died, but I didn’t. I fought for my life then, just like I’m going to fight for my life if you decide to take this to trial. I write romance novels because I love the idea of love. I believe in true love and that’s exactly what my husband and I have. We are destined to be together and I have no doubt in my mind that not only will he stand by me through this whole ordeal, he will also bring our baby to court with him. So, why don’t you think about that? Why don’t you think about what it will be like for you to put an innocent young mother on trial to defend herself against nonsense charges? Maybe your bosses won’t look at that too keenly. Maybe they’ll think that you should go out there and prosecute real criminals, not an innocent woman who should be at home taking care of her infant.”
I push my chair back and walk toward the door.
“And now, gentlemen, you will have to excuse me, but I have to go have this baby.”
Chapter 26 - Ellie
When I have a baby…
My cool and calm and everything is going to be okay attitude goes out of the window as soon as we get to the parking lot. That’s when I realize that I’m about to have a baby and I freak out. To be honest, I’ve been terrified of giving birth. I know that many women look forward to the experience and want to feel every last bit of it. Well, not me. I’m really a wimp when it comes to pain. Especially, the kind of pain that I don’t have much control over.
With all the drama surrounding my arrest and the wedding, I was able to put it out of my mind at least a little bit. Or at least, put it on the back burner. Well, not now. Now, Aiden is rushing me to the hospital as my stomach seizes in pangs of pain. I don’t know what labor is going to be like, but I’m terrified. When I first got pregnant, I got a little Google-happy and read a lot of forum posts about what different women’s experiences of labor were. Well, let me tell you, if you want to appease your anxiety about something, do not read about other people’s experiences on an online forum. The issue is that women with good experiences of labor and delivery, you know, the ones that go smoothly and ones where nothing exciting happens do not take time out of their day to write their birth stories. The only ones that do are the ones with real stories to tell.
“I don’t think I can do this,” I say, tears running down my cheeks. “I’m so scared.”
“It’s going to be fine, Ellie. Everything will go well.”
“Aiden, I have to tell you something,” I whisper through the pain. “I don’t want to feel anything. I know that this may make m
e sound like one of those not super enlightened mothers, but I just don’t. I don’t want to feel any pain. I just want it to be over.”
“Well, if you want, you can get a C-section. Remember, you were telling me about that?”
I nod.
“There will still be pain afterward though,” he says.
“Yes, I know, I know. But I’ll be in recovery. It will be over.”
“Ellie, this is your experience. I don’t want you to suffer more than you have to. Whatever you want, honey. I just want both you and the baby to be fine.”
I take a few deep breaths. Just knowing that this is an option is making me feel better. Okay, okay, if everything goes to shit and I don’t want to do this anymore, I will have a C-section, I decide. It’s my choice. I’ve read plenty about it. Planned C-sections take about twenty-five minutes and you don’t feel a thing. They give you an epidural and you just lie there as they take the baby out. The recovery isn’t bad either. You can even go home the next day if you want.
I take a deep breath as we walk into the hospital. They immediately place me into a wheel chair and wheel me into a room with my doctor and nursing staff. I realize that C-sections aren’t for everyone and emergency ones can be hell, but somehow the idea of having one instead of facing an unknown number of hours in labor puts me at ease. If I want, this can all be over very quickly. And then, right before the doctor says anything, I make the decision.
* * *
Two hours later, they wheel me out of the recovery room into my own room. My husband and our son are already there. The procedure took about twenty minutes, not counting the epidural and all the setup. Then they took me into the recovery room for forty-five minutes where they wrapped and unwrapped my legs and stomach, while I lay there unable to feel anything. Once they transfer me to the hospital bed, they hand me my son. I’ve seen and felt him on my chest in the operating room, but it’s not the same thing as actually holding him now. I take him into my arms completely overwhelmed with emotions. Tears start to flow down my face.
“I love you, Ellie. You did so good,” Aiden says. A little tear glistens in the corner of his eye as well.
“I love you, too,” I whisper.
We stare at our baby, who is sleeping soundly in our arms.
“I have some news for you,” Aiden says, without looking away from the baby. He’s talking about the possible trial. I should have some sort of reaction, but I can’t really elicit one. It’s almost as if all of that is background noise now.
“Please don’t tell me bad news right now.”
“I won’t,” Aiden says.
Wait, did I hear that right? I look up at him. He shrugs.
“I won’t tell you any bad news,” he repeats himself.
“What do you mean?”
“Thurston called. They are dropping all charges.”
“Really? Are you serious?” I gasp. “What made them change their minds?”
“Apparently, Mann’s boss had it out for me. His family was family friends with Blake’s family. He kept pushing them to file charges, but Mann only agreed to meet with you. The police told them that it was a very flimsy case, if that. Finally, after the sit-down, he just decided to not go ahead with them after all. They’re dropping all charges.”
“Oh my God!” I exclaim. A wave of relief sweeps over me. For a moment, it feels like I’m going to drop the baby.
“I’m so…happy,” I whisper. “It’s over. It’s really over?”
“Yep.”
“You hear that, Tristan? Mommy is not going to prison!” I say.
“So, you want to name him Tristan?” Aiden asks, looking at both of us lovingly. I shrug.
“We’ve talked about that name a lot, remember?”
“Oh, yes, of course. It’s one of my favorites as well. I just wasn’t sure it was your favorite.”
I smile at him. “It is.”
“Well, Tristan it is,” he says, giving me a peck on the cheek. We had decided on the middle name a while ago. “Welcome to the world, Tristan Finn.”
Chapter 27 - Ellie
When he surprises me…
To say that the days that follow are easy would be an understatement. We are first-time parents, learning largely as we go. But we get through them. The days and nights all melt into one, but somehow one month passes and then another and Tristan keeps getting stronger and stronger. He weighed eight pounds seven ounces at birth and didn’t lose much in the coming weeks. Much to my surprise, Aiden took time off from work and spent a lot of time with us. He offered to hire help, but I said we should wait on that for some time. Let’s try to do this ourselves.
The best thing about the experience was how much Aiden helped out. Well, no, that’s not the right word. He’s the father. Taking care of his child should not be called ‘helping out.’ But you know what I mean. He connected with Tristan right away and spent a lot of time with him. He took on the responsibility of taking care of him most nights so I could get rest and sleep. After a while, we started splitting the night. I would take care of Tristan until around two a.m., feeding him once or twice as needed. And he would take care of the rest of the night until around eight. After a while, we got into a groove. Things started clicking and slowly but surely, Tristan started to eat more and more during the day and less and less at night.
“I have a surprise for you,” Aiden says on the morning of Tristan’s third month birthday. It’s early afternoon and the day has already been action-packed. We’ve dressed Tristan up in a cute new outfit, took pictures of him, fed him, he spit up all over his new outfit, we changed him into an old onesie, swaddled him, and put him in his swing for a nap.
“Oh, yeah?” I ask, sleepily. I got about eight hours of sleep last night, thanks to Aiden, but going to sleep so late has been taking a toll, nevertheless. I feel tired most days until well into the evening.
“Yep,” he says. His eyes light up with that mysterious twinkle I haven’t seen in a while. He sits down next to me on the couch.
“Is it a nanny? Because I might be more amenable to the idea of a night nurse right now,” I say, stretching out in his lap.
“Yes, we can get a nanny or a night nurse, if you want,” he says. “But that’s not what this surprise is.”
I look up at him. He pets my head and smiles at me.
He pauses for a moment, trying to formulate his words just right. My heart skips a beat. Oh, no, I think. What if it’s something bad?
“Will you, Ellie Rhodes Black, sail away into the sunset with me?”
“What do you mean?” I ask, sitting up, a big wide smile spreading across my face.
“I want to take you and Tristan to the Caribbean where the sand is snow white and the water is crystal blue.”
“For how long?” I ask.
“For however long you want. But I was thinking we can start with six months and go from there.”
My heart skips a beat, again. This time in excitement.
“Really? We can do that? Really?”
Aiden nods and takes me into his arms. “We can do anything we want.”
“When are we going?” I ask.
“The yacht is in Miami. The plane is ready to go now.”
“Now?” I ask.
“Any time we want. I was thinking we’d leave tonight.”
“But what about packing? We have to get everything together.”
“The yacht has everything we need, for us and Tristan,” he reassures me. “All you need is to pack some of your personal things and I’ll get some of Tristan’s.”
“Are you packed already?” I ask. He nods.
I wrap my fingers firmly around his hand and bring it up to my lips. I don’t know what adventures await our little family in the future, but I know that I can’t wait to find out. After giving him a kiss on the lips, I get up and go pack a bag.
* * *
Thank you for reading HIS TO BIND!
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I’m dark, dangerous and powerful. I have to make her mine the instant I see her. Innocent and afraid, she does not belong here.
Yet, here she is. Standing on the podium, being auctioned off to the highest bidder.
I pay good money for her. The contract is unbreakable. She has to do everything I want tonight. But I don’t want just sex. Oh no…I want so much more.
Tonight, there are no rules…
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“Her words make me ache and yearn for more.” - Dancer in the Dark
“Dark and addicting!” - Lexi Rae, bestselling author
I owe him a debt. A big one.
A dark and dangerous stranger paid for my mother’s cancer treatment, saving her life.
Now I owe him. But I can’t pay it back with money, not that I even have any.
He wants only one thing: Me.
His for one year.
Will I walk away in one piece?
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