by Dilloway, PT
He was already sitting in his chair by the time she arrived. “Sorry,” she said, wheezing from the run through the parking lot. “Running a little late.”
“It’s all right,” he said. From his tone, she knew it would be the kind of session when she would have to pull each syllable from him with a pair of tweezers.
“Well, let’s get down to business. How are things going with you and Sarah? Are you still seeing each other?”
“Yes.”
“And?”
“It’s fine.”
“That’s not a very convincing answer. Is there something wrong? Tell me, Max, that’s what I’m here for.”
“I thought you were here to help me fit in with society.”
“Well, I think Sarah fits that description. She’s a part of society, isn’t she?”
“I suppose.”
“You want to fit in with her, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Great. So what’s the problem?”
“I don’t know what to do. I keep trying to make her happy, but everything I do seems to go wrong.”
“What have you done that made her unhappy?”
“It’s hard to explain.”
“Is it?”
“I want to satisfy her, but nothing seems to work. She always ends up even more miserable than before.”
“Satisfy her how? Are we talking about sex, Max?”
“No,” he said a little too quickly. As his cheeks turned red, she was glad he couldn’t see her smile. He was just like her brothers when it came to discussing intercourse. They could brag about it in locker rooms with other guys, but with her the subject became awkward.
“It’s all right Max. You don’t have to be embarrassed.”
“It’s not that kind of problem. You wouldn’t understand.”
“Why not?”
“I just want to make her happy. How can I do that?”
His face and voice betrayed a desperation she hadn’t seen before in their sessions. Whoever Sarah was, she’d clearly put a spell on Max. In her notes, Lindsey scribbled the word “Love?” next to Sarah’s name. “Well, Max, like one of my professors told me, let’s start at the beginning. How much do you know about Sarah?”
He considered the question for a moment, the muscles in his face twitching through a variety of painful expressions. “Her parents and brother died. She works at the aquarium. She likes to watch the fish at night.”
“Is that all?” When Max said nothing, she added, “I think you need to go to Sarah and talk with her more about her interests. Find some common ground.”
“I don’t know, what if we don’t have any common ground?”
“You have to take that chance, Max. Any relationship involves risk. You might look like a fool or get your heart broken, but you have to try. Otherwise you’re guaranteed to get nowhere. Do you understand?”
“I suppose.”
“Good. Now, let’s talk about something else.” They spent another hour going over his progress at the church and Midway House. Lindsey doodled a heart around Sarah’s name on her pad as she listened to Max. He promised again to cooperate more with Mrs. Garnett, but she doubted he would follow through.
After he left, she picked up the telephone and asked the operator for the Gull Island Aquarium. Lindsey told the receptionist, “I’d like to speak to Sarah, please.”
“Last name?”
“I’m not really sure. Do you have more than one?”
“Just a moment, let me check.” A minute later, the receptionist said, “I’m sorry, there’s no one named Sarah here.”
“Are you sure?”
“I checked the registry. I could transfer you—”
“No, that won’t be necessary.” She hung up the phone and drew an X through the heart she’d drawn. Max was lying about Sarah. Now she needed to find out why.
Chapter 23
Max’s watch told him it was eight o’clock at the precise moment he walked through the hospital doors. He needed to find out more about her. Only then could he make her happy.
All night he sat up listening to Beethoven’s “Emperor” concerto while contemplating how he could know so little about Sarah after all this time. He had seen her at every stage from newborn to adult, but he still knew nothing about her heart. All the pain he’d witnessed in her dreams did little to tell him about her hopes and ambitions.
“You’re a little earlier than usual,” Henrietta said as Max reached the nurse’s station.
“I just want to see her. Is it all right?”
“Sure, Dr. Teague won’t be in until later. He’s got to get in eighteen holes before rounds.” Henrietta let him in and Max took his usual position at Sarah’s side. When he heard the door close, he allowed her to pull him inside.
He sensed trouble right away. He floated through a dark sky with fog rolling in from the ocean. Where was she?
He started with the aquarium, but she wasn’t there, nor was her car in the parking lot. He tried her house next, finding her bed still made. Her friend Alicia was still sleeping; he didn’t find Sarah there either.
He began to move faster until he zipped around the island at the speed of light, searching from one end to the other for her. Where was she? Grim scenarios appeared in his mind. Sarah being swept away by the waves like her first dream. Sarah trapped in a burning building, screaming for help. He had to find her.
Then, along Coastal Road, he saw her black Explorer. Its headlights were turned off as the SUV wandered from one side of the road to the other. Ahead of the car, the road bent in a dangerous curve as it wound towards Finley Bluff. Max remembered hearing a story in third grade about a carload of teenagers going off the curb after the prom. He couldn’t let the same happen to Sarah.
He dropped into the car and found Sarah behind the wheel, drinking a bottle of whiskey while singing out-of-tune with the stereo. The song was “The Long and Winding Road,” the same song his mother had often hummed while painting. She had tears in her eyes as she sang; the sadness in her voice transfixed him in the passenger’s seat. He heard nothing but her singing as the car smashed through the guardrail and began to plunge towards the rocky shore below.
“Wheeee!” Sarah shouted as though this were some kind of roller coaster ride. She threw the bottle over her shoulder and began to laugh as the car tumbled through the air.
Too late to prevent the accident, Max jumped from the vehicle and surveyed the ground below. He replaced the rocks with a layer of mud to cushion the Explorer’s fall. At the last moment before the SUV struck the ground, he tipped it to land on its tires, hoping they would absorb most of the blow.
The Explorer bounced several inches into the air before coming down hard in the mud. Smoke rose from the wrecked SUV. Max hurried back to the Explorer to find the rear of the vehicle in flames. Sarah fumbled with her seatbelt, blood gushing from a cut on her forehead. “Help! I can’t get out.”
He yanked the driver’s door open, tore apart the seatbelt, and scooped her up. “Who are you?” she asked.
“You can see me?”
“Of course I can. Who are you?” Her voice sounded sleepy, as if she had just woken from a dream.
“My name is Max. I’m here to help.”
“Max? I used to have a dog named Max.” He clutched her in his arms and floated up to the road. Once he’d set her down on the pavement, he placed his hands on her face to heal the gash on her forehead until it was only a scratch.
After he finished, he tried to move away from her, but she grabbed his arm. “I have a boo-boo!” she said in a falsetto voice. She stared at the blood on her hands and laughed.
“You’re going to be all right, Sarah.”
“You know my name?”
“I know a lot about you,” he blurted out, and then regretted it.
Before they could say anything else, the Explorer on the beach exploded. Sarah crawled over to the edge of the road to stare down at the flaming wreck of her SUV. “Oh my God,”
she said. “You saved my life.”
“It wasn’t anything.”
“How did you know?”
“I saw you go off the road.”
“How’d you get me up here so fast?”
Max didn’t know what to say in response to that question. “We should get you to a hospital,” he said instead.
“I’m all right,” she said. Then she stood up, took a few wobbly steps, and sank to her knees on the ground. “Maybe not. Do you have any aspirin?”
He produced a vial. Sarah downed three of the aspirin and then put a hand to her forehead. “I don’t feel so good.”
“I think we’d better go. My car’s right over there.” He created a silver BMW 525xi Lindsey had described to him from a catalog. The sedan’s blue headlights cast a glow like moonlight over the scene. In the light, Sarah’s face looked as beautiful as the first time he’d seen her, more so now that she was smiling at him. For a moment he forgot about the accident, forgot they were living in a dream world, and focused only on that smile meant for him. “I guess we’d better go.”
“I think you should drive. I’m still a little tipsy.” She staggered towards the car until he took her elbow and guided her into the passenger’s seat. “This is a nice car.”
“Thanks,” he said. He strapped her in and then hurried around the front of the car to take the wheel. Since he’d never driven a car before, he thought back to his childhood and how Mom and Dad had driven. He tapped the long pedal on the right, but nothing happened. Then he tried the one next to it with a similar result.
“Have you driven before?” Sarah asked.
“Not in a long time.”
“You have to shift into drive first. Push the button on the stick and pull it back to the ‘D’ there.” Max did as she instructed and the car rolled forward. “Now hit the accelerator.” When he tried the pedal on the left, it stopped the car’s forward progress. By process of elimination, he released the pedal and tapped the other one. The engine revved and the car began to move up the hill. “Are you getting it now?” she asked.
“I think so.”
“Good. I need to pass out.” Her head lolled onto her right shoulder and he worried for a moment she was dead until he saw her chest still rising and falling as she breathed.
He took almost an hour to get to the hospital. When he pulled into the parking lot, Sarah woke up and smiled at him. “Now push that lever over to the ‘P’ and we can get out.”
“Thanks. I’m sorry it took so long.”
“No rush. Gave me a chance to catch up on some sleep.”
“Oh.” He helped her from the car and held her elbow all the way through the front doors of the emergency room. A nurse rushed forward to examine Sarah’s injuries.
“What happened?” the nurse asked in Henrietta’s voice.
“She had a little accident,” Max said.
“We’ll have to have a doctor look at those. Are you her husband?”
“No, I’m—”
“He’s my guardian angel.” Sarah winked at him before the nurse led her away to examine the wounds. Max went to the waiting room and sat in one of the chairs. He should go now. If he left now, she might attribute his presence to the head injury and could go on with her life as usual.
His legs wouldn’t move. He thought of her standing in the predawn light against the water, smiling at him as her savior. Her guardian angel. This was his chance to get to know her in a way he’d never thought possible. He could be with her every moment to make sure she was happy. Never again would she have to feel despondent or frightened or sad.
She returned a half hour later with Band-Aids over the cuts on her face and a bottle of pills. “I just have to keep them clean and take these antibiotics,” she explained.
“Make sure you use up the entire bottle,” Dr. Lee said.
“I will. Thanks, doctor.”
“It was good to see you again, Sarah. I wish it had been under better circumstances.” Dr. Lee gave a hollow laugh before sauntering off to help someone else.
“I’m glad you’re all right,” Max said.
“Thanks.” They looked at each other for a moment before she said, “I hope it’s not too much trouble, but I could use a ride home.”
“Of course, I’d be glad to give you a lift.” He took her elbow again, savoring her closeness: the smoothness of her skin when he held her arm, the silkiness of her hair when it tickled his cheek, and the warmth of her body as she leaned against him. Never had he felt such happiness just being next to someone.
The drive to her house went much smoother now that he’d learned the rudimentary concepts of driving. “So where are you from, Max?”
“Here. I grew up on the island.”
“Really? I don’t remember seeing you before.”
“I’ve been away for a few years. I just moved back.”
“So what are you, a doctor or lawyer? Somebody important to have a car like this.”
“I’m a—” He scrambled to think of something. She would never believe a church pianist could afford a BMW that listed at a base price of $45,000. “I’m a concert pianist.”
“Wow, so have you played Carnegie Hall and all that?”
“I’ve been all over the world: New York, London, Paris, Vienna. I’m planning a tour of South America next.” He waited for her reaction, hoping he hadn’t overplayed his hand by trying to impress her.
“So why’d you come back here?”
“This is my home,” he said.
When she reached over to touch his right arm, his entire body stiffened. “I didn’t mean anything by it. This just seems a little out of the way.”
“I like the peace and quiet.”
“So do I. Where do you live?”
“I’m moving into Gullcrest Heights. I’ve been staying in a hotel until the papers are finalized.”
“Really? I live in Gullcrest Heights too. Maybe we’ll be neighbors. Then we could see each other all the time.”
“I hope so.” He regretted saying that, not wanting to sound desperate, but she didn’t seem to notice.
“It’s a pretty nice neighborhood. You have a really great view of the water from the bluff and some wonderful sunsets, at least that’s what my mother says. I’m usually not home by then. Too busy with work.”
“That’s too bad.” They reached her driveway and she got out of the car under her own power, meeting him at the tip of the BMW’s nose. Before he could say anything, she leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek.
“Thank you for everything. I’m not sure what would have happened if you hadn’t come along to save me.” He couldn’t move or speak, too shocked from the sudden kiss to do anything. “Would you mind if I took you out to dinner sometime? It’s the least I can do after all you’ve done.”
“Sure.”
“How about tomorrow night I meet you at your hotel? Let’s say at eight o’clock? Do you have a cell phone or should I call the hotel?”
“You can call the hotel, I guess.” Everything was going so fast now; his mind was still trying to process the feel of her lips against his cheek. No woman since his mother had ever kissed him.
“I’ll have to borrow Mom’s car, but it shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll see you tomorrow, Max.” She kissed him again, this time on the other cheek before disappearing into the house. Long after she closed the door, he stood in the driveway, not believing what had happened. Then he got behind the wheel and trundled away; he had a lot of preparations to make for his new life in Sarah’s world.
Chapter 24
Max sat on the balcony of the Gull Island Regency’s penthouse with a pad of paper. He had so many things to do before Sarah came over, a whole life to invent. He couldn’t afford to leave anything up to chance; any inconsistencies could destroy his relationship with Sarah.
The first major question facing him concerned his parents. Should they still be alive? At some point if their relationship progressed enough, she would want to know about his pa
rents, possibly even meet them. If they were alive, where would they live? He’d already told her he was from Gull Island, so wouldn’t it make sense if they still lived here? Or perhaps they’d moved somewhere after he became a famous pianist.
The possibilities began to unravel before him. He had a chance to do for himself what he’d already done for Sarah. He could bring his parents back from the dead and create an alternate reality where he’d never gone blind and they’d never died. An alternate reality where he, Sarah, and their parents could all live happily.
Mom would have pictures hanging at the local art museum—a whole wing!—while he and Dad would play a series of concerts at Wainwright Hall. Sarah would sit in the audience with her parents and Mom to watch the performance. What piece should they start with? Dad loved Beethoven, so they should start with something of his. “Fur Elise” maybe, a familiar tune that would provide a good warm-up for the rest of the concert. Why not feature Beethoven for the entire concert? He and Dad could perform all their favorite Beethoven piano sonatas.
He sketched all the pertinent details of his new life in the notebook. Before Sarah came over, he would have to memorize every date and place. Nothing to give her the impression he was being anything less than truthful, though none of this was actually a lie. Or perhaps it was all a lie, depending on how one looked at the situation.
“Max? Max, it’s eight-thirty. Visiting hours are over,” Henrietta said, her voice a distant nuisance. He did not move from the balcony. “Come on, Max, it’s time to go.”
He finally pulled himself out of Sarah’s mind and back into his world of darkness. “I don’t want to go,” he said.
“I’m sorry, but those are the rules. You can’t stay here all night.” She put a hand on his shoulder, but he batted it away. He didn’t want to leave, not now. There was so much to do, so much he needed to create before the date with Sarah. They couldn’t stop him now just for a stupid rule!