by J. L. Berg
“Come on. What are you waiting for? The ocean is right there.”
“But it’s so cold!”
“I know. If it weren’t, everyone would be skinny-dipping. That’s what makes it fun.”
I stared at the crashing waves, contemplating my decision. “Okay, I’ll do it. But you have to go in with me.”
A wolfish smile spread across his face. “Done.”
Now came the uncomfortable part.
“So, do I just strip?” I asked, suddenly wondering what I’d gotten myself into.
I could still feel the heat of him as our bodies touched under the moonlight. His arm slightly tightened around me.
“Yep.”
“Okay, but you have to turn around,” I insisted.
His eyes roamed down my body. “Are you embarrassed by what I might think? Because, believe me, you have nothing to worry about.”
I gulped. “I’m a classy kind of girl. No getting naked in front of each other on the second date.”
“Okay.” He nodded. “I’ll cross my fingers for the third then.”
My eyes widened as he stood, walking a few steps away.
I tried to keep my cool.
Dear God.
Crap.
What have I done?
But I was clearly failing miserably.
Killian obviously had no body hang-ups whatsoever because, the second he was turned away from me, he began to strip.
Layer by layer.
I was instantly entranced. My body refused to move as I watched him peel off his long-sleeved shirt, revealing miles and miles of sleek muscles.
I wondered what all that would feel like against my tongue.
He walked a little farther down the beach, wearing nothing but a pair of low-slung jeans. But that didn’t last long.
The moment his feet hit the wet sand, he stopped.
A chill went down my spine as he slowly removed his jeans.
“Holy—” I whispered under my breath.
If his ass was any indication of what had yet to be revealed in the front, I wasn’t sure I’d survive.
“Waiting,” he hollered as his toes met the sea.
No time like the present.
Feeling completely on display, despite the darkness surrounding me, I got to work.
I should have been cold.
Downright freezing.
But, as I lifted my shirt, feeling the brisk air hit my bare skin, nothing but flames ran through my veins, fueling my every move.
Dear God, this was stupid.
Reckless.
Insane.
And completely exhilarating.
My heart raced as I ditched the last piece of my clothing. Looking left and right for anyone who might still be lingering on the beach, I breathed a heavy sigh of relief when I realized we were the only two left.
But it still didn’t stop me from stashing my clothes under a grocery bag for safekeeping.
I’d seen enough movies to know what happened to naked people who had left their clothes out, unattended.
I might be feeling adventurous tonight, but the idea of sitting in Killian’s rental, completely nude, as he drove me home because some idiot had stolen my clothes sounded a bit like hell to me.
“Did you chicken out?” Killian’s deep voice boomed over the waves.
I looked up, realizing I hadn’t moved an inch.
“No,” I answered rather proudly.
For once, I actually hadn’t chickened out.
Now, all I had to do was take the first step.
Here goes nothing.
I’D NEVER BEEN MORE IN tune with the sound of someone’s footsteps in my entire life.
As Kate took each hesitant step toward me, I found myself growing more and more aware of the way the sand crushed beneath her feet and how her breaths seemed to falter as she grew near. Even over the roar of the ocean, I could pick out each and every noise she made, as if I’d been preprogrammed to her individual frequency.
I knew I was playing with fire. I’d been in danger of getting burned ever since I met this strange woman.
But I couldn’t seem to help myself.
Is she scared?
Nervous?
Turned on?
Every time I talked myself into following the rules I’d laid out, I would end up right back here.
Breaking them in spades.
Sure, I could reason with myself and say this was all part of the plan. After all, I had sought out to seduce the woman. But I knew that was just more bullshit I was telling myself.
I was stretching this whole thing out. Making every moment last for as long as possible, so I could enjoy it all.
Enjoy her and everything she had to offer.
And didn’t that make me the biggest asshole of them all?
Because I knew how this would end.
I knew.
And she definitely did not.
Finally, I heard the change in water as she approached. It moved differently as she walked toward me, as if it were welcoming her. Every molecule in my body wanted to turn around, to see her beautiful nakedness under the moonlight.
But I’d promised I wouldn’t, and considering everything I’d done so far in the name of professional growth, I owed her that much.
“This water is really fucking cold,” she said, announcing her arrival.
I laughed instantly. “I don’t think I’ve ever actually heard you curse before.”
She giggled with a slight shiver. “I curse,” she said adamantly before amending, “Mostly in my head, but I do curse.”
I felt her shoulder brush mine as cold salt water sloshed around us. Knowing the depth of the water was enough to completely cover her, I turned.
The tips of her hair were wet as the honey-blonde ends floated weightlessly around her. Without thinking, I reached out, letting several silky strands wrap around the pads of my fingers. It was an intimate thing to do, and I immediately recognized the gesture for what it was, letting my hand fall back to the water.
Awkward silence followed.
“So, this is skinny-dipping then?” she asked as we stood side by side while the waves tried to push past us.
“Yep,” I replied, feeling like a total loser.
I’d coaxed her out here on a dare, and she’d taken me up on it. Now, I was failing the job.
Why was I being such a pussy?
“I thought it would be more…”
“More what?” I asked.
“Exciting,” she answered with a shrug. “Is this how you’re supposed to do it? I mean, maybe I should just go back.”
I could see her retreating into that shell she’d created for herself. The shell that divided Kate from Laura.
I couldn’t allow that.
“Nope. Sorry, that won’t do,” I said a split second before I grabbed her and threw us both into the oncoming wave.
I hadn’t thought this through.
I hadn’t thought about the way our bodies would twist and twine together under the crashing waves of the ocean.
How her skin would caress against mine.
Her deliciously naked skin.
Fuck.
Every neuron in my system fired to life as her legs wrapped around mine. My feet touched the sandy bottom, and I pushed to the surface, our collective breaths gasping for air the instant we broke free.
I expected a giant slap across the face.
Instead, I was met with boisterous laughter.
And a face dunk.
With a mouthful of water, I came back up, sputtering and coughing, but thoroughly amused.
And intent on revenge.
Moving quickly, I reached underneath her and cut her off at the knees. She instantly went down, a look of pure shock as the water engulfed her.
Now, it was my turn to laugh.
“You jerk!” she squealed as her head bobbed back to the surface.
“When you dish it out, you have to be prepared for the consequences.” I chuckled
.
“Consequences, huh?” A wicked gleam sparkled in her eyes.
“Don’t,” I warned as I watched her hands form a pyramid along the calm water.
She gave me a smirk, lifting her hands a few inches before splashing me square in the face.
“Cute,” I remarked. “Are you having fun yet?”
“Oh, yes, this is definitely meeting my expectations.” She laughed. “You?”
“Not quite yet, but I can remedy that.”
Confusion marred her beautiful face mere seconds before my hand found her waist. A quick gasp escaped her lips as her body went flush against mine.
“Perfect,” I whispered.
And it was. I could feel the swell of her breasts against my chest, the delicate curves of her waist as it pressed against my throbbing erection.
Yes, definitely perfect.
Looking up at her, I expected to see that mixture of timid excitement I always found so enticing whenever I pushed her past her limits, but what I saw was mostly fear.
“I’m sorry,” she apologized, turning away from me.
Stepping back, I gave her some space.
“It’s not you,” she promised. “I just…I haven’t done this—I mean, is it okay if we take it slow?”
“Of course,” I agreed instantly, seeing the insecurity in her eyes.
It was the first time since the night in the bar that I saw no trace of Laura behind those eyes.
Just shy, sweet, vulnerable Kate.
I’d thought that side of her was dull and boring.
But, seeing the pain in her expression, I knew she was anything but.
Kate or Laura—it didn’t matter. I was falling for this woman.
“What kind of work assignment requires wine and cheese?”
My eyelids had barely cracked open. “Are these early morning phone calls going to be a regular thing, Liam? Should I pencil you in? Same time every day?”
“Can’t a brother check in every once in a while?”
“You? No.”
“That hurts, Killian. It really does.”
“What do you want, Liam? And, seriously, stop hacking into my shit. Put your skills to good use and get a fucking job.”
“I’m working on something,” he replied, making my eyes instantly roll.
“Jesus, are you doing illegal shit again? The answer had better be no.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “Back to you. Who’s the girl? And don’t change the subject.”
I huffed, knowing he’d deny anything I accused him of anyway.
The little fucker was using my money for one of his illicit money-making schemes.
Again.
“She’s no one,” I replied.
“Do you always fly across the country for no one?”
My eyes squeezed shut as my temples throbbed. “It’s complicated. She’s complicated.”
“Holy shit. You like this woman!”
I sighed. “That’s the complicated part.”
“You’ve got it bad, too. I didn’t think I’d ever see the day. I mean, there were a few near misses when you were young and stupid—or drunk.” He laughed.
“Shut up.”
“Sorry, I’m enjoying this moment.”
“Well, get over it. I need to go,” I huffed, looking over at the small alarm clock next to the bed. It was barely eight o’clock, but for Liam, it was nearly eleven in the morning.
Fucking time change was kicking my ass.
“Hold up, I’m not done with you yet.”
Sitting up, I tried to keep my eyes from closing. “What else do you want? You’ve already raided my bank account, and you’re living in my apartment. Do you want to borrow my clothes now, too?”
“Hell no,” he replied. “I’d rather walk around the city naked than put on your shitty excuse for style.”
I shook my head. I’d almost forgotten what a stuck-up snob my brother was when it came to fashion. “Right, I forgot. You’ll just take my money and buy your own stuff.”
He didn’t have a flashy comeback for that one.
“Look,” he finally said, “there’s a reason I called.”
I waited.
“Do you even remember what today is?” he asked hesitantly.
I pulled my cell phone away from my ear, checking the screen for the date.
Shit.
“No,” I sighed. “I’m sorry, Liam. I completely forgot.”
Silence followed before he spoke, “I figured.”
My fingers slowly massaged my aching forehead. “You’ll put flowers on her grave?”
“Yeah,” he replied.
“Have you been visiting Dad?”
“Every week.”
“Good. Is he—”
“Any better? No. He has dementia. He’s not going to get better.”
I nodded, knowing he couldn’t see me. “Right. I know.”
“You could still come and see him though.”
“I will,” I promised.
But both of us knew it was a lie.
A lie I’d been using since the day my father entered that nursing home.
My brother might be a moocher, but out of the two of us, he was the better son.
The loving son.
The one who always remembered. The one who put flowers on our mother’s grave, even after my father stopped remembering.
And me?
I was the opposite.
Nothing but an asshole, through and through.
I’d had big plans today.
Well, they were plans at least.
But, instead, thanks to my brother and his ever-faithful reminder of today, I was sitting in my empty motel room, drowning in memories.
“Why do you buy flowers for Mom all the time?” I asked as I paced next to my father with my hands firmly shoved deep in my pockets.
We’d been standing in this florist shop for what felt like an eternity.
He shrugged, his big shoulders rising higher than the top of my head. “I always have.”
“Yeah, but don’t you think she’s tired of it now? I mean, you’ve been doing it for, like, a million years. It’s not like it’s a surprise.”
He looked down at me with an amused expression.
Ever since I was little, I’d sworn, one day, I’d grow tall enough that I’d finally look my father in the eye. So far, in my sixteen years of life, it hadn’t happened. I was starting to believe it never would.
“How long have we been going to that ice cream shop? The one down the street?”
“I don’t know,” I answered. “Probably since I was little. Maybe even before Liam was born.”
He nodded. “Since you were two. Every Sunday since you were two. Are you tired of it? ’Cause we can stop.”
The chip I’d had on my shoulder since about the age of thirteen wanted to say yes. But I knew better.
That hole-in-the-wall ice cream shop was a tradition. It was the only time of the week when the four of us—my parents, my little brother, and me—would all get together and spend a few minutes as a family.
“Get her the yellow ones,” I finally said.
He simply nodded, a knowing smile appearing on his proud face. “Good boy.”
My father had brought her flowers every week until he finally succumbed to the disease that stole his memories and had to move into a nursing home for his own safety. Sometimes, I wondered how he could possibly remember those damn flowers week after week when there were days when he couldn’t find his way home or even tie his own shoes.
But he had.
Even after she’d been gone for twelve years, he always managed to find her.
My parents’ close friends had always looked up to them and the marriage they held so dear. Long after my mother had died of breast cancer, he never stopped loving her. He never moved on. They were meant to be—or at least, that was what everyone had said.
Everyone but me.
Because no one else had been around to see my fat
her’s health slowly decline. No one else had heard him crying out for her when he woke up and realized, every night, that she was gone. There was only Liam and me to help pay the bills when he couldn’t because he’d spent their life savings on hospital bills and funeral processions.
Love had destroyed him.
It’d destroyed them both.
And, after picking up the pieces of my father’s shattered heart, I’d vowed that I’d never make the same mistake.
I’d never fall in love.
It was exactly the reminder I needed.
I’d been staring at the same blank screen for hours when a quiet knock jolted me out of my comatose state.
Wondering whom it could possibly be, I stomped toward the door, ready to ream the intruder. I’d purposely put the Do Not Disturb sign up, forgoing maid service today, so I could be alone in my silence.
“Did you not read the sign?” I yelled a split second before I saw her.
“I’m sorry,” Kate apologized. “The person at the front desk was nice enough to give me your room number.”
“Shit, I’m sorry.” I quickly backtracked. “I thought you were the maid.”
“Do you always yell at the staff?” she asked.
I stepped aside and motioned her to come inside. “No. Sorry, it’s been a rough day.”
As I shut the door behind me, I noticed her taking a quick tour around. I did the same, wondering if I’d left any damning evidence out.
But then again, what did I have exactly?
I’d accomplished absolutely nothing today.
The motel room was small and underwhelming to boot.
After a few seconds, her gaze returned to me. “It’s nice,” she said.
I couldn’t help but smile. “It’s a shithole, but thanks for trying.”
She shrugged. “You won’t be here forever, right?”
I stared at her with a blank expression.
“Your apartment hunt?” she said.
I nodded. “Right. Sorry.”
“You feeling okay?” she asked. “I’m sorry to stop by like this, but I got off work and thought you might want to get dinner.” Her voice faded. “I should have called first.”
She started for the door.
“My mom died,” I finally said.
She swung back around, and her eyes met mine.
“When I was in college. Breast cancer. Twelve years ago today. I didn’t remember,” I confessed.