by C. R Corbin
"What are you going to do? Come on, lay here. I think there's enough room on this branch." I muttered and he shakes his head.
"I'm keeping watch...Tomorrow when we get some alone time we can do whatever you want." he stated in a sweet voice that I have never heard him use before.
It was light and airy, almost like it didn't even belong to him like it had flown into his soul from the air and planted itself in his lungs. This sweetness that was so unexpected from a man such as him was flickering off his lips with the slightest gasp when he gazed at me and I loved it. I loved all of it. I gazed back at him while he stood on the branch above, his hands clenching the wood as his claws sunk into the pulp of the tree and he stared at the moons. He turns to face me a couple of times and tells me to go to bed while my eyes flickered and I was slowly captured by the darkness.
CHAPTER NINE
Dezdrin
I would never get over how the morning accentuated her beauty. This morning however, I didn't have much time to admire her at all. I was stuck in my trance while staring at her, the sun had just risen and the light was flickering over every inch of that beautiful, curvy body and she was sighing. The air brushed her hair away from her face and she smacked her lips while I smiled and glanced her over. My eyes locked with a single beam that was rapidly approaching her though, I could recognize it as a laser sight...
A Jorathian laser sight.
I jumped in the way of it and grabbed her before tossing myself off the tree just in the nick of time as the branch was then burned all the way through by a single laser beam. I pressed the button on my belt and the suit soon appeared around me, my armor enclosing as I gripped my knife and looked around.
"We're under attack?" she asked me and I nodded.
"Seems that way." I remarked and she frowns.
""Well well well. I see why you didn't want to attack now." Kol remarked while glancing at me, I only scowled.
"How the hell did you find us? I was sure that our trail was covered." I stated and he shrugged.
"Oh it was, but we were...persistent. We had been waiting for the right time to strike but it seems like you're fully healed. I won't miss next time." he stated.
"Where's Mephisal?" I asked, my ears were quivering as I tried to get an idea as to where my other former comrade might be.
"With the other humans...." he stated, his red eyes glowed menacingly and his grey skin was darkened in the sunlight that shone onto his back. From the angle all that I could see was a darkened version of his front with his eyes being the only thing that were truly visible. The glowing red eyes glimmered while he tensed his fist up while glancing me over, smiling.
"Well then, do you know who we are girl?" he asked and she nodded.
"Yeah. The guys that attacked and killed my friends!" she cried out, I could see the anger simmering, it was threatening to boil over from the way her face grew flush and her eyes shone.
"Oh don't be so down on us human. After all your friend there was going to attack too until he saw you I reckon. You've never hesitated to kill anyone before but this is the thing that broke you Dezdrin? Really? A human girl? I suppose that a man will do anything for his mate." remarked Kol and she glances over at me.
"W-what?" she asked.
"Oh you don't know? We were bandits girl, we regularly slaughtered and did whatever we pleased but then he sees you and decides that he's just going to go rogue on us this time. Had I known that I would have understood and dragged you along with us forcefully but it seems like old Dezdrin here has gone soft. Doesn't want to see you squirm." spat Kol as he lifted the gun back up while she looked over at me.
She has this look of utter heartbreak that overcomes her. She mutters and stumbles over her words while pointing at me, her eyes widened and she shivers while her face scrunches up.
"You've been lying to us?" she asked.
"Oh how I love it when they're in emotional distress before they die. You want to know more girl? He's killed children, men, women, all in the name of money. There was nothing he wouldn't do along with the rest of us. Whatever he's told you must be a bunch of bullshit seeing as how you're so shocked. Did you think that he was the saint that tried to stop us? No he did it just to keep himself happy." admitted Kol and I can only frown as I tensed my grip around the knife, ready to toss it at any second before this wooden sphere is tossed in front of us before exploding. It was one of the gas grenades that Kelly had been working on.
"We're here! Are you guys alright?" Kelly asked, I can feel Josh grab a hold of me as I cover my eyes and mouth. I hear Kol crying out in the background as he stumbled away through the trees.
"Yeah....we're fine." remarked Amanda as we were dragged away. I stumbled out of that cloud and collapse to my feet, gripping my neck before splashing some of the water onto my face. My vision darkens and I am still in incredible pain but I manage to stumble to my feet.
"We need to lose them. Run." I stated and stumbled forward while assisted by Josh. We run by the river bank while more of the weapons are tossed behind us to disguise our trail. After a long while my eyes begin to clear up and my vision returns and I am confronted with the harsh reality of the situation.
My past had been revealed and now...there was nothing left to do with exception to the possible hope that I may discuss this over with them.
It was a conversation that I did not relish.
We stopped near the river bank and I sighed while listening in on their conversation. They all just about collapsed on the floor after all of that running and I knelt over the river with my fingers dipping into the stream to collect some of the fluid that is then placed on my face. I groaned while the water runs down my neck and I turned back to face them. On our way inland I could hear them conversing, it has already begun it seems
"How do you guys make it out?" asked Amanda, her tone was soft and subdued, defeated in a sense.
"Using the weapons that we made. These gas things really came in handy." remarked Kelly.
"Luckily we got there on time. But I think Dez would have taken care of it easily right?" asked Josh with a grin splattered across his face. Amanda continued to frown and that's when they started to pick up on it.
"Amanda. What's wrong?" Kelly asked her, I decided to interject before she could begin.
"I can answer that question." I remarked and walked over to them.
We had all gone further inland amongst the trees and were sitting on a small patch of grass. The trees swayed around us and the sunlight was barely peeking through as it was the afternoon. I stopped near the circle that they had formed and Josh moves over to give me a spot but I shake my head.
"What's wrong?" he asks.
"Yeah you guys are really quiet." remarked Kelly.
"He's not who you think he is." said Amanda quietly while pointing over at me.
I stand there with the sun beating down on my back. The golden sky of this planet shines and I see the silhouette of two moons in the air, their momentous stone forms clamoring together into a cluster that was next to the sun. I hear the streams running and smell the mist before I looked over at her.
Might be the last time I see this so I took in everything.
I glanced over that soft brown hair and glanced at her blue eyes while she looked back at me. Her lips part and I sense that she was about to speak but she closes them and continues to wait. I frowned while looking at her, my body shakes and I feel my hand quivering. Her curves were perfectly illuminated in the light, her legs crossed beneath her while she looks back, a frown creeping its way onto that face that I adored so much. As soon as the tear fell from her eye I felt a knife pierce my heart, the flesh of my soul felt like it was being cleaved into two and burned.
"What do you mean? You're working for them?" asked Kelly while an angry expression began to creep onto Josh's face, his black hair dancing over his forehead while he grimaced.
"I was...we weren't mercenaries. We weren't contractors. We were criminals, bandits, that's the truth. We
happened upon your encampment and I stopped short of attacking it because...because I saw Amanda. Because she's my mate. After that they left me for dead and well...here I am in front of you." I stated and Josh gritted his teeth.
"Why would you even lie about this? Why did you keep this a secret?" he asked
"Because if you thought me a criminal and a man capable of such malevolence you wouldn't have trusted me enough. I needed her to trust me and I needed your cooperation to win this battle and well...I had it until now." I remarked with a melancholic expression.
"We would have....why did you keep this from us? What else are you keeping from us?" asked Josh as he nearly lunged at me. He grabs me by the flaps of my armor and pulls me in, shaking me and growling while I could only glance at him blankly.
"So you really were going to kill us...you really were a horrible criminal just like them and the only reason you halt the attack was because of her....It wouldn't have been a problem should you have told us in the beginning!" remarked Kelly and I frowned.
"I was afraid if you knew of my past then I thought that..." I trailed off before I feel Josh release his grip and try to push me back.
"Well....looks like we're still stuck with you even if you're scum. Tomorrow looks like the day to finally do it, we don't have a choice. God this is just....I don't know. I really did start to like you, I really did but I guess that's all a pipe dream now isn't it?" asked Josh as he turned away and began to walk while Kelly only stared at the ground with a frown.
"So you never felt anything at all? You never really did want to help us but you're just in it for her...I guess I can understand. What I can't understand is how you could have tolerated evil like that for so long, been a part of evil such as that for so long and still....I don't know." remarked Kelly as she turned away, her blond hair dashing over her cheeks as she turned and looked out into the forest.
And then finally Amanda.
"Amanda." I remarked and she looked up at me, turning away and frowning.
"I don't want to talk to you right now." she remarked.
"I'm sorry that...I'm sorry that you were tricked into believing that I was something I wasn't." I stated.
"So that story about you and the Kasorians...everything else you've told me about who you were was a lie?" she asked me and I shook my head.
"That was all true, I swear." I remarked and got on my knees in front of her. She shares a glance with me, just a brief moment when our eyes locked and I can hear the breath scratch her lips while I keep my eyes on her.
"I don't know what to think...I'm just angry that you would lie to us like that. That you've done this so many more times before and the only thing that snapped you out of that is...i'm not angry at what you were, i'm angry about what you told me you were." She said and turned away, walking into the forest and shaking her head while I remained in place, shaking my head and resting it in my hands while I tried to think of a way to make this up to them, to her.
I wandered the woods for a while longer and headed towards the river. I stare at the stream and contemplate all that has just occurred in the last day, the revelations and the violence that had been inflicted upon our tiny little family, a family that I had a part in building up was now crumbling before my very eyes.
The person that I was flashed before me, the flickers of violence dash across the waters as I see the man I used to be. The amount of people I killed and the violent acts that I committed was astounding. I see the dead children, the women, the men, all of them crumbled beneath our might and we didn't stop, we continued until all had perished and we could claim what we had coveted so much. We could claim the riches for ourselves without any care in the world as to who might else be there.
And then suddenly the images turn into a blur as I see her gazing back at me, she smiles and suddenly all of those horrid memories fade and I am left in a new light, a hope that hasn't been present since my childhood. She was the chance that I had the chance to cease the life that I had been leading.
And now she was possibly gone forever.
This was surely a minor revelation to be sure but the more I thought about it the more I realized that who I was had less power over their opinion of me than the fact that I had lied, that I had deceived them all into befriending a man that wasn't even real, he was a facade. Only then could I understand their anger completely and I turned back to the camp. I had to make my way there and apologize to them, I had to make this right should we be entering battle soon.
I step back tentatively before my gait grew in its confidence and I was soon standing tall once again. I was ashamed of what I had been but I have changed because she has changed me. I was no longer that animal that I was once all of those years ago and I knew it to be true, I would live not as a beast but as a man and if she had felt betrayed enough by the identity that I once had then well....that would be okay too. I would give my life, my heart, everything that I had in order to protect her from these demons that are only days away.
"Everyone." I said as I stepped into the middle of the camp. They were all looking at me with tired eyes, not wanting to fight any longer, but not really in the mood for listening either.
"I...I was wrong to have lied to you. I should have told you the truth about who I was from the beginning. I was no mercenary, no contractor, I was a beast that was unleashed only by malevolence and now I realized that. I realized that because of you, Amanda, after these days of travelling with you and falling in love I know now that I have changed and I hope that you realize that I have changed as well. I know that I can never rebuild the trust that you two have instilled in me but here I am now, asking you to grant me a new chance to live not as Dezdrin the bandit, but Dezdrin the man...please." I pleaded.
I looked up at them, staring at their blank expressions that soon contorted into a series of hurt expressions. I realized that I had no right to be doing what I did, I should have died a long time ago for who I was, but here I was seeking redemption and I was on the cusp of it. I had stumbled with my deception, but I knew that if I came clean completely here and now, then I could be absolved, there was still the chance to and I would take it.
CHAPTER TEN
Dezdrin
Amanda stares at me while I laid my heart bare for all of them to see. My facial expression doesn't change but my eyes do and I can see the sadness begin to creep its way to her pupils while I glance them over. Amanda frowned while looking at me, her lip was quivering already but I steel myself. I had to be strong, I had to draw on the same strength that I had taught her if I wished to be forgiven.
"Would you have attacked if you didn't see her?" asked Josh and without a beat, I nod.
"Yes." I remarked.
They all remained in collective silence, scowling at the realization that this man had only stopped short of slaughtering all of them because I physically desired Amanda. They felt used, as if that emotional bond that I formed with them was simply a ruse to bind me to Amanda, as if it had all been a lie in the end. I really was this cold blooded murderer, I really was as evil as my compatriots were. I had to prove them wrong.
"So you were a criminal....and you were here for what? To kill us?" asked Kelly as the blond hair dances over her cheek and her brown eyes peeked through the curtain of blond hair.
"No. We were here on a trip to hopefully collect some of the ore that we had thought lurked inside of this planet. Unfortunately that was all a lie and well...the next best thing was attacking you. We have done it many times in the past, we have assaulted and raided camps in exchange for wealth but the only thing holding me back this time was you." I admitted and pointed over at Amanda.
"So why did you feel the need to lie to us? You didn't think that we would have accepted your help even if you were only in it for her? So what if you were a criminal? You were helping us so it would've been irrelevant." said Josh and I frowned.
"Back then you would have flipped if you found out about my actual nature. A cold blooded murderer is much less trus
tworthy than a simple merc or contractor so that's why...I didn't mean for things to go on for as long as they have but it seemed more convenient to try and forget who I was rather than tell you about who I was and come clean. I knew that with your suspicions a criminal would be much more difficult to trust and have watch you, especially one that was going to slaughter you had it not been for his hormones getting in the way...But now I know that it isn't' just hormones, I have changed and I know it to be true." I admitted.
"Then prove it to me. Prove it to us." Amanda said to me with tears in her eyes as she leapt to her feet, quivering with indignation and emotional turmoil.
"You could see it in the days that we have spent together. You have seen this side of me that I thought had long perished, rise up once more to be kind to all of you...I know that he has returned but I know of no way to show you with exception to this....I love you more than I ever will love anything else. I will die tomorrow protecting you if need be, I will perish here but know that the love that we shared was no lie, it never was.." I state and reach out to stroke her cheek.
"Well what do you say guys? I think I can forgive him." said Kelly.
"You sure he's changed all that much?" asked Josh and Amanda stands her ground in front of me, her eyes flicker with slight hints of hope before she begins.
"Do you regret who you were?" she asked and I scowled.
"Every waking moment." I said with all the sincerity that I could muster.
"Well we know that you're not working for them so...that's a start I guess. We've all made some mistakes and over these last couple of weeks you've changed....I guess we can turn a new leaf." admitted Josh while glancing over at me.
"A new leaf...What you've taught us over these last couple of weeks has been vindicated since the clash this morning so...yeah. I suppose I can understand your reasons." admitted Kelly.
We all paused for a moment, they seemed to still be rather distant but that was better than a couple moments ago when they were openly distrusting everything that I had done. I needed to hear from one more person to make sure that the plan was a-go for tomorrow, I needed to hear from her.