by Leanne Davis
“Yeah?”
“Be careful. We adore little Lillian, but we don’t need another grandchild, or at least, not yet, not from you.”
He shuddered. “Erin… Stop. Besides I’m not…”
She turned and left, sparing him any further words of warning. He glanced around the large, open room. His niece was just three and he doted on her, but it still threw him that his dad and Erin were freaking grandparents at the tender ages of forty-five and thirty-six. Erin had no kids of her own and was substantially younger than his dad, but still, it was hard to think of them as grandparents.
Throwing his tux back onto the rental bag, he sunk down on his bed. His room overlooked the flowing river. He reclined and stared up at the ceiling. Had tonight really happened? Had it finally happened? He couldn’t believe it was real. He half expected Cami to change her mind about him either tomorrow or the next day. What if she thought it could work out, but the reality was she realized they were nothing more than friends? That could happen. He rolled over, trying to ignore the loud voices and all the what-ifs in his head. That’s why he restrained himself from doing anything about his feelings toward her for so long. Now, all he could do was move forward and hope what she said tonight described how she truly felt. Sighing, he tried to force his eyes to remain closed, but they kept flipping open. Excitement? Uncertainty? All of it felt so surreal.
****
The next morning, Charlie slept in and only got up after reading a while in his most current fantasy story. After downing a whole box of cereal and drinking a huge glass of milk, he got dressed and walked out towards where his dad was working in the barn.
Charlie glanced further up the road at the gigantic, towering arena that was recently completed. It was designed and built according to Ben’s idea and inspiration. Well beyond where their original house stood, it seemed so far from the homes and Charlie. He felt ambivalent towards it. Sure, it was good for the family and provided jobs for them, along with members of the valley community. And it also supplied them with enough money to keep their operations running, including a multiple-acre, organic apple orchard, and a surfeit of horses they trained and boarded year-round. There was also the twenty-cabin resort, and the new restaurant, which was housed in the arena. Uncle Shane had an auto body shop on the ranch where he restored anything mechanical and also built custom motorcycles. There was a little bit of everything now on their once exclusive horse ranch. Only a decade ago, it was so much smaller and simpler. For Charlie, that was how he preferred it. His dad felt the same way too.
His dad handed the reins of running the resort and arena to his brother, Ian, and his wife, Kailynn. That allowed his dad and Erin to begin working on something entirely separate, different, and totally theirs.
Just like it used to be.
That also seemed to bring his dad back to life, back to being the man Charlie always remembered. So much larger than life. Strong. Dominate. Capable. Yet his dad was also very kind and generous to a fault. He returned to the barn he originally used to train his horses. Along with Ben and several hired hands, AJ took care of the new stalls and the magnificent, new barn that was attached to the arena.
However, none of them dared to approach Jack’s personal barn. It was a much smaller and simpler outdoor arena attached to his much smaller barn. Charlie found plenty of comfort in seeing his dad working like he used to during Charlie’s early childhood. “Dad? Erin?” he yelled inside the gloomy interior.
“Hey, Charlie, over here.”
He followed his dad’s voice into the bowels of the building. His dad was currently setting up a new operation to occupy his time. He planned to take abused, neglected, and wild horses to train and rehabilitate for new homes. He hoped the operation would eventually pay for itself and perhaps provide some kind of profit for them as well. He already made arrangements to rescue and adopt the horses rescued by the BLM (Bureau of Land Management), who captured wild horses for training until they could be re-homed. It paid a nominal amount, but if done in great volume, and being led by such a skilled trainer as Jack, it could theoretically support the cost of feeding and training the horses Jack intended to rehabilitate.
Hot horse breath filled the barn with humidity as they nickered and neighed when Charlie entered the barn. Charlie enjoyed inhaling the earthy scents and hearing the familiar sounds, which were the backdrop of his entire life. A lot had changed during the last decade, but seeing his dad smiling and whistling while he worked with his own horses again elated Charlie. It reminded him of elementary school and when Erin first showed up there.
“Well, look who finally rolled out of bed. Late night?” His dad’s tone was warm and good-natured.
He rolled his eyes. “Been up for a while. Just reading. Eating. Why? Did you need me out here?”
“Nope. Erin and I got it already.” He paused, rolling his shoulders back. “God, I love saying that. She and I tending our own horses. They are all actually ours, belonging strictly to her and me and no one else.”
“Finally. An improvement that turned out to be good for you and what you always wanted.”
“Finally.” Jack’s eyes gleamed as he leaned against the stall near them, peering at Augusta, his favorite horse. He trained her to do all kinds of tricks that were unnatural for any horse to accomplish. Augusta was nearly twenty now.
Jack leaned on the stall next to him, putting his head through the slats to touch Georgie’s neck. “You had fun then last night?”
“Yeah.”
“I still can’t believe you already attended your senior prom.” His dad shook his head. “You ever see the picture of your mom and me from our senior prom? It’s in that old photo album in my desk. Check out your mom’s bangs. They were so thick and long, but definitely the hottest style at the time. Hard to believe it was almost thirty years ago now.”
“I remember that picture,” Charlie chuckled. “You looked just like Ben but wearing a bad suit. Seriously odd how much you two resembled each other. Just like identical twins when you and he were both eighteen.”
“But you did have a good time?”
“Yes. But I won’t miss anything from that useless school.”
“Yeah. I’m sorry about that. The school experience around here was never right for you.”
Charlie shrugged his bony shoulders. He was several inches shorter than his dad and skinny. His collarbone projected from his too white and very freckled skin. He had a shock of red hair, brighter than either his dad’s or Ben’s. And he had the most freckles. He looked like the bookworm and nerd he’d always been accused of being, although he wasn’t a nerd and resented that classification. “I probably could have tried harder. I just didn’t care too much. Didn’t like most of the other students anyway. Luckily, I had Cami, Jacob, and Brianna right here. They were enough for me.”
“I didn’t need a lot of people for friends either. That’s how I always was. I had my brothers and you guys, so I never bothered with any outsiders, but well, you see how I lost…” he waved towards the enclosed arena and made a face. “Anyway, Joe told me Jacob and Brianna will be arriving here in a few days. Right after you graduate. I still can’t believe you’re graduating.”
His dad had begun many of those sentimental discussions throughout Charlie’s senior year. Nostalgia seemed to hit Jack pretty hard. “I can’t wait.”
“Neither can I. I think your smarts are totally wasted around here. You, Charlie—you’re going places. I can’t tell you how proud I am of that. I mean I love you unconditionally, no matter what you decide to do in life. But with that huge brain and your work ethic? Yeah, I’m really proud of you.”
Charlie rolled his eyes at the flattery, but the shot of pleasure that jolted through his system was real. No matter how hard he tried to pretend that he found his dad’s pride in him utterly lame, he didn’t. It meant everything to him. He knew his dad was severely disappointed in Ben’s path in life and where it led. After eloping with a girl that no one liked only a year afte
r he graduated, Ben couldn’t even give their dad the pleasure of witnessing it. Then, on the night of the fire, Ben cheated on her before he ran away. His wife, Marcy, died in the fire. But a baby was also conceived and eventually, Ben and long-time friend Jocelyn worked it out, and chose to stay together. Now Ben had a child to raise and he still worked at the ranch. That was his sole future. No choices about it. No dreams to try to fulfill. No experimenting with other lifestyles. No acting out. Ben went from one immature relationship to another.
His dad had often expressed his hopes privately to Charlie, doing so many times over the last two years, begging him to be different. He told him to wait to get married and have kids. To experience the world first. But most of all, Jack wanted both of his sons to attend college, and take advantage of the freedom and independence he, himself, was never offered. It was something he could provide for Ben and Charlie. Ben’s subsequent rebellion in many ways was the reason why he was now stuck on the ranch and living the same lifestyle that Jack lived. Jack often explained that it was the best route for him, and he had no regrets, not even now, but he wanted his sons to have so much more. To experience something new and different. Sure, he would welcome them back to settle here later on, if they were sure they wanted to after experiencing what the world had to offer.
His dad didn’t actually say it, but Charlie understood that his hopes were now fully invested in Charlie.
That’s why Charlie hesitated before he mentioned the change in his relationship with Cami. At least he wasn’t getting married anytime soon, and definitely not having a baby. For those reasons alone, he hoped his dad would stay calm and sane about the change in their relationship status.
“So, did Erin mention what happened last night?”
“Not really. Why?”
Out with it. Be direct and act confident or his dad would assume he wasn’t ready for a change in their relationship. “Cami and I just started dating.”
His dad gripped the boards of the stall with both of his fists. “Huh? Oh. Wow. Okay. So you’re like…”
“Duh. Dad. Do you want me to draw a picture for you?”
“No. It’s just… I consider her my niece, you know—”
“Well, I never considered her my cousin. I didn’t even meet her until I was twelve years old. And she’s not blood-related.”
His dad ran his hand through his hair. “Right. But what if something goes wrong? We still employ her dad and Kate is my sister. Charlie, it could have real and lasting consequences.”
“I didn’t choose to do it lightly.”
“Do what?”
Charlie rolled his eyes. “No, I’m not sleeping with her. I meant, I told her how I felt about her, and she told me she feels that way too.”
“How do you feel? Can you describe it to me?”
“I’m not Ben, Dad. I know what I feel. I know what I’m doing. I don’t let my emotions control me. But I do love her. I thought long and hard about when to tell her.”
His dad visibly swallowed. “I know. You’re solid as the earth and just as reliable. I just hate to risk the chance that your enduring friendship could become tarnished. And the relationship between AJ and Kate is also important to me and all of us, actually.”
“That’s why I waited so long to admit it. It’s pretty important to me too. I didn’t do this just because she was dressed up so pretty last night. I planned it. For close to a year. But I told her last night because I knew it would make it much more special for her. She hasn’t had a lot of special things in her life, like taking center stage in someone else’s life and being sincerely cared about.”
“Well… I… Damn. Apparently, you’ve already put more thought into this than I did with Erin or Ben did with Jocelyn or even Marcy. I mean, we were—”
“Awful at it? Really, you both were. And it hurt Erin and Jocelyn. You both made them cry and not believe you guys when you said you loved them. Me? I always try to make it special for the one I love and care about. I took her to a dance, and then we went up in the hills above the ranch. Music played, and all the stars were out. The whole valley glowed with all the beautiful lights. It was warm and pleasant and romantic. It was all about her. Exactly what I knew she would like.”
His dad pressed his lips together to stop the bittersweet smile of obvious regret. “Okay, yeah, you got me, Charlie. You way outdid me, and I was freaking thirty-five years old with Erin. I certainly didn’t wait until she was dressed up all pretty and we were in a nice, romantic spot—”
“So give me some credit, Dad. This isn’t any fling, or a whim. It’s also no mistake.”
His dad straightened up and nodded. “You’ve always been light years ahead of me in your maturity at whatever age you were. You only really needed me to provide shelter and food. I swear, you always took care of yourself and did it well. Your emotions were acknowledged and yet, you understand and have the smarts to handle them without being impulsive, stupid, careless, or selfish. I respect your decision because you’ve done it as an adult and you can handle your shit. I have to tell you though, I think that’s what I’m most proud of.”
Charlie nodded his response, eagerly accepting his dad’s unending praise. “Let’s hope AJ sees it like that, but I doubt he will. That’s my next stop.”
His dad patted him on the shoulder. “I was sorry Erin didn’t have parents, for her I mean, although it made it hella easier for me. Good luck.”
Erin came up on the tail end of their conversation and swatted him as Jack slung his arm over her shoulders with visible warmth and ease. “Listen to you two. Handling your awkward stuff with maturity and no yelling.”
Jack nodded. “I finally grew up.” He grinned, and she shook her head. “But you know you loved all the drama between us. Remember how exciting us finding each other was…”
“It was something, all right. Anyway, I’m glad you told him, Charlie.”
“Let’s hope AJ and Kate feel the same way.”
“Do you think she told them yet?”
He stopped as he was about to open the door. “Cami? Actually confronting an issue with quiet words and mature conversation? If she’s not rebelling, then she isn’t confronting anything. I highly doubt it. She’ll wait for me to say the word.”
“At least you know her well.”
“I so know her.”
He exited the barn and could hear them kidding around as he left. A wave of relief washed over him because there was a year and a half when his dad and Erin weren’t interacting like that. Charlie started to fear that they might not stay together, and he needed Erin. As his mom. Yeah. She was that. It was meant to be. They didn’t have to make a big thing out of it. They didn’t have to announce it and he didn’t have to call her his mom; she just was.
Cami, however, was the polar opposite of Charlie. Her emotions ruled her actions, roiling waves through her that would often rise up and out of her with no warning or catalyst. She would act and speak in ways that were fueled by those strong emotions, both negative and positive. Sometimes she meant what she said, and sometimes she didn’t.
Prone to erratic behavior and impulsive responses, she tried the hardest to hide who she really was from her dad. She struggled to remain as quiet and serene as she could manage around him. AJ was unusually quiet, strong, and placid. Cami wasn’t strong. But she wasn’t placid either. Yet, she strove to be like that with AJ, trying to become the daughter she believed he wanted her to be. To this day, Charlie never believed that was what AJ wanted, but nothing he said could convince Cami.
Crossing River Road to her house, Charlie knocked and waited. He skipped any phone call or text and just decided to come straight there. Holding his hands in his pockets until the door opened, he saw Cami standing there. She was right back to herself today. Her long, dark hair looked ratty and the jeans she wore hung loosely on her small frame. She was petite, tiny, and nearly doll-like in her appearance. Charlie liked how he felt whenever he was near her. She had a huge smile that lit up her dark
eyes and dimpled her cheeks. Her skin tinged in pink as she stared up at him.
“Hey,” he said, keeping his warm gaze fastened steadily on her. Last night was taking their relationship to a never-before-experienced level. She wasn’t comfortable with the change yet and probably wouldn’t be for a while. That’s just how she was. No doubt, she would follow his lead, and act the same way he did. Therefore, if he appeared shy, uncertain or odd, she would too. No. That wasn’t how he wanted them to start out together. With a confident, easygoing, and generally flippant air, this was how they would have to be now.
“Hey,” she repeated, her husky voice soft and breathy as she stepped out the door towards him. With his hands on her waist, he pulled her forward, leaning down and setting his lips on hers. It was easy at first and very quick. He pulled back to gauge her reaction and look into her eyes. She raised up on her tiptoes and pulled his head down to bring him closer again. The energy and heat rose between them and his cool logic fled as her mouth opened against his. They started kissing in a long and passionate embrace on the porch of her house. In broad daylight. The spontaneity took him, and he sensed, her too, by complete surprise. So new. Wow, all of this was so new.
“Charlie? Cami?”
They froze. Lifting his head, Charlie immediately let go of her. They stared at each other for a brief moment and she pressed her lips together before her eyes flashed. She tightened her lips into a flat line and her neck looked strained, as if… Crap. They’d been caught.
It was AJ’s voice, of course.
Chapter Three
NOT EXACTLY HOW HE planned for this to go, Charlie squeezed Cami’s hand and then turned towards her dad. AJ’s gaze drilled straight into them. Arms crossed over his chest, he demanded, “When did this start?”
“Last night,” Charlie answered. “I came today with the purpose of telling you.”
“But what? You got distracted?” AJ’s eyebrows rose, and his tone was challenging.
Charlie smiled, holding AJ’s gaze with a strong look of his own. “I’m afraid I did.”