by Anne Mather
‘So—what are you saying?’ she breathed, running the tip of her finger along the roughened edge of his jawline.
Joel flinched at her touch, but he didn’t move away. ‘Look at me,’ he said instead, gripping the back of his neck with agitated hands. ‘You’ve been back—what? Barely a month. And already I’m a nervous wreck. I can’t eat; I can’t sleep. And any illusions I had that I was content with my life have all crashed and burned. Does that answer your question?’
Olivia gazed at him. ‘You mean that, don’t you?’
‘Damn right, I mean it,’ he declared savagely, and, abandoning any further attempt to restrain his actions, he slid his hands over her shoulders and pulled her against him. ‘You know I love you,’ he said huskily. ‘You must know I want to be with you.’ His eyes darkened. ‘Does your being here mean that you might forgive me, after all?’
Olivia uttered a breathy little laugh. ‘It might,’ she said tremulously. ‘I’m thinking about it.’
‘Well, don’t take too long,’ said Joel unsteadily, burying his face in the scented hollow of her throat, and Olivia trembled all over.
Her fingers clung to his shoulders, glorying in the taut strength of the arms that encircled her so possessively. Even now, it was hard to let herself believe this was actually happening. She’d been so depressed when she went to London, so unsure of what to think, what to do.
But this was Joel, she thought incredulously, the man she loved and who loved her. Had loved her for fifteen long years, years they’d wasted because of a jealous woman’s lies.
And like a dam breaking, emotion flooded her body. There was no need to keep him in suspense. She loved him too much to let this moment slip away. ‘I’ve thunk,’ she said huskily, pressing herself against his hard body. ‘The answer’s yes.’
Their journey up the stairs was only punctuated by moments when Joel divested himself and Olivia of what they were wearing. Her shoes barely made it past the first stair and her dress slipped silkily off her shoulders a few moments later.
The fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra caused a few minutes’ delay as Joel’s hands found her breasts and stroked them into painful arousal. But when she slid her hands beneath his T-shirt, he was compelled to discard it and go on.
She found the drawstring of his sweats only seconds later. The soft fabric skimmed down his narrow hips and he had to kick himself free of them before he tripped. However, her lacy thong did make it to the landing, where it adorned the newel post, like some erotic symbol of their desire.
Their lovemaking was hot and urgent at first. They were hungry for one another and there was no time for foreplay before Joel spread her legs and plunged into her slick sheath. Her moan of satisfaction was stifled by his mouth, and Joel’s head was swimming as the blood rushed wildly into his groin.
He felt Olivia climax only moments before his own release, the instinctive tightening of her body engulfing him in flames. ‘God, I love you,’ he groaned, when he lay shuddering in her arms, and Olivia stroked the damp hair back from his temple with a trembling hand.
‘I love you, too,’ she whispered. ‘So much. As soon as I saw you again, I knew I’d just been kidding myself that I’d got you out of my life.’
They made love again then, gently this time, sharing every delicious moment, stroking and caressing each other in an emotional demonstration of their love and renewal.
But then, Joel propped himself up on one elbow and looked down at her. ‘Tell me about Garvey,’ he said, not wanting to spoil the moment but he had to know. ‘Did you love him?’
Olivia gave a rueful smile. ‘Yes, I loved him,’ she said. ‘But not like I love you,’ she added huskily. ‘I couldn’t understand why at first. He was young and very good-looking and I don’t deny I was flattered when he asked me to marry him and move to New York, but there was no real—connection, if you know what I mean?’
‘I’m trying to,’ said Joel gruffly, and Olivia giggled.
‘You’ve no need to be jealous,’ she assured him gently. ‘Our relationship was anything but passionate.’ She paused. ‘I must be incredibly naïve. When he insisted on waiting until we were married before consummating our relationship, I thought he was doing it for me, because he knew I’d had one disastrous relationship—ours—and he thought I wasn’t ready for another.’
Joel’s brows drew together. ‘What are you telling me? That he was—gay?’
‘See, you got it in one,’ said Olivia ruefully. ‘Yes, he was gay. But it took me months before I found out. And because he convinced me that we were good for one another, that it wasn’t necessary for a relationship to be a sexual one to work, I went along with it. For what seems like such a long time now.’
Joel turned her face towards him. ‘God, Liv, if he hurt you—’
‘He didn’t.’ Olivia sighed. ‘I hurt him, I think. But it took me some time to realise that, although I was living this celibate life, Bruce wasn’t. I was just his cover, the wife he could escort to functions and display on any occasion when a wife was needed.’
‘Hell!’
Joel stared down at her with impassioned eyes and she reached up to press her lips to his. ‘Don’t look like that, darling. It wasn’t all bad. Bruce was a generous man. He was kind. Selfish, perhaps, but kind. I had my own bank account, a string of credit cards. He liked me to spend his money. He encouraged me to fill my wardrobe with expensive clothes, expensive accessories. There was nothing I couldn’t have—financially, at least.’
‘And then?’
‘And then I discovered that he was leading a double life. The nights he was supposed to be working late—he was a merchant banker and they often work late into the evening—he was visiting his lover. Well, a series of lovers, actually,’ she appended, her cheeks turning pink. ‘He was a member of this club and—’
Joel laid his finger across her lips. ‘You don’t have to go on,’ he said. ‘I get the picture.’ He paused. ‘So you told him you wanted a divorce?’
‘Mmm.’ Olivia’s lids drooped. ‘He wasn’t pleased.’
‘I can believe it.’ Joel snorted. ‘You were in danger of exposing his deception.’
‘Right. And all our friends—his friends, and work colleagues, all thought we had an ideal marriage.’
Joel nuzzled her cheek. ‘So, what happened?’
‘I moved out of our apartment. I got myself a small walk-up in Brooklyn and started divorce proceedings.’
‘I gather they took some time?’
‘You better believe it.’ Olivia nodded. ‘Bruce fought me every step of the way.’ She bit her lip. ‘He—he even went so far as to tell anyone who’d listen that I’d moved out because he wanted children and I didn’t. I’d been stupid enough to tell him about—about the miscarriage, and he chose to use that against me, too.’
‘But God, you could have made him suffer. Not to mention taking him for every penny he had.’
‘I didn’t want his money. I didn’t want anything from him. OK, maybe I was stupid, but I just wanted to be free.’
‘Oh, Liv!’ Joel gazed at her with agony in his eyes. ‘I wish I could take back every one of those years and make it up to you.’
Olivia looked up then, a smile tilting the corners of her mouth. ‘Hey, this is going a long way to achieving it,’ she assured him huskily. ‘We all make mistakes, Joel. Me more than most.’
‘And now?’
She wet her lips with a nervous tongue. ‘I suppose that’s up to you.’
‘OK.’ Joel didn’t hesitate. Getting up onto his knees beside her, he said, ‘Marry me. Marry me, Liv. Again. As soon as I can get a licence.’
‘You really want to marry me again?’
‘How can you doubt it?’ Joel groaned, taking one of her hands and raising her palm to his lips. ‘I’m crazy about you, Liv. Say you’ll give me a second chance.’
Olivia didn’t hesitate either. She wound her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her. ‘Oh, I’ll give you another
chance,’ she whispered. ‘And I will marry you. Whenever it can be arranged.’ She hesitated. ‘I want to have your baby, Joel. We can’t replace the one we lost, but we can ensure that Sean has more than one brother or sister, hmm?’
* * *
They were both sound asleep when the doorbell rang.
Olivia, her bottom curled spoon-like into the curve of Joel’s thighs, was the first to hear it. The sound echoed unpleasantly through her subconscious, and, although she didn’t want to move, she was obliged to open her eyes and shift a little restlessly against him.
Joel, getting exactly the wrong impression, pressed closer, and she felt the unmistakable stirring of his erection. ‘Hey, you’re insatiable,’ he muttered huskily, parting her thighs, but Olivia pulled away from him, turning onto her back as the doorbell rang again.
‘Hear that?’ she said, unable to prevent the smile that touched her lips at Joel’s obvious disappointment. ‘You’ve got a visitor.’
‘Shit!’
Joel scowled, but when the bell rang for a third time, he had no choice but to slide out of bed and reach for the dressing gown hanging on the back of the bedroom door.
As he wrapped its folds about him, Olivia pushed herself up against the pillows. ‘Who do you think it is?’ she asked, unknowingly exposing dusky pink nipples to his urgent gaze, and Joel groaned.
‘My mother and father?’ he suggested flatly, seeing the look of dismay that crossed her face at his words. ‘They phoned from the airport earlier. They wanted me to go and pick them up, but, as you know, I’d been drinking. I had to refuse.’
‘I’m glad you did,’ she murmured, barely audibly, but Joel had heard her.
‘So’m I,’ he said, pausing to bestow a lingering kiss at the corner of her mouth. ‘Hold that thought, baby. I won’t be long.’
The bell rang again, more insistently this time, as he went down the stairs, and, although he’d been attempting to pick up all the items of clothing strewn around, the summons was too urgent to ignore. Abandoning his efforts, he dropped the clothes he had rescued onto the chest at the foot of the stairs and strode barefoot to the door.
‘Are you aware that it’s raining, Joel?’ demanded his mother, brushing past him into the hall. ‘So much for us being concerned about you. You certainly took your time answering the door.’
‘Are you aware that I was in bed, asleep?’ retorted Joel, giving his father an apologetic look as he followed his wife inside.
‘In bed?’ Diana Armstrong took off her jacket and shook a spray of water over the floor. ‘It’s barely ten o’clock, Joel. How much have you been drinking, for heaven’s sake?’
‘It’s none of your—’
He didn’t finish. His mother had been about to deposit her coat on the chest when she saw the jumble of clothes Joel had dropped there. Without hesitation, she picked them up, saying with obvious distaste, ‘You’ve got a woman here, haven’t you? Your father was right.’
Joel took the garments out of his mother’s hands and returned them to the chest. ‘Not a woman,’ he said tersely. ‘The woman. Liv arrived just after you’d called. Does that explain the situation?’
Diana’s mouth dropped open in disbelief, but Patrick Armstrong was much less perturbed. ‘I wondered how long it would be before you two got together again,’ he said warmly. ‘I hope it works out this time, son. I really do.’
‘Thanks, Dad.’
Joel shook the hand his father offered, but Diana wasn’t finding it so easy to come to terms with what she’d heard. ‘You mean—you were in bed with Olivia Foley?’ she said incredulously. ‘Oh, Joel, is that wise? What if—what if she hurts you again?’
‘I won’t.’
The voice came from above their heads and Joel turned to find Olivia coming down the stairs towards them. She was wearing an old rugby shirt of his that barely covered her thighs, a momentary peek of scarlet lace proving she’d rescued her thong from its perch.
His heart leapt into his chest as he went to meet her. She was so adorable, so beautiful, and she was his. He could hardly believe that fate was being kind to him at last. He wanted to take her in his arms and howl his satisfaction to the moon.
‘Olivia!’ Diana recovered quickly, moving towards the pair of them with a practised smile on her face. ‘You must forgive me for being anxious. It’s a mother’s privilege, you know?’
‘Well, it’s a wife’s privilege to defend herself, Diana,’ responded Olivia smoothly, realising that the intimidation Joel’s mother had once represented was all gone. ‘Hello, Patrick,’ she added, accepting his warm hug. ‘Did you have a good flight?’
‘Well, it was delayed—’ Joel’s father was beginning, when Diana broke in.
‘What did you say?’ she demanded. ‘A wife’s privilege?’ She turned blankly to her son. ‘You two haven’t got married again while we were away, have you?’
‘Not yet, Mum,’ said Joel comfortably, putting a possessive arm about Olivia’s shoulders and pulling her close. ‘But it’s only a matter of time. I’ve asked Liv to marry me and she’s said yes.’
‘Well, congratulations!’ Once again, it was Patrick Armstrong who made the first move. ‘It’s long overdue, if you ask me. There should never have been a divorce.’
‘I agree.’ Joel bent and bestowed a warm kiss on the top of Olivia’s head, and no one watching them could be left in any doubt that he meant it. He looked at his mother. ‘Aren’t you going to give us your blessing, Mum?’
Diana’s lips tightened for a moment, but then, as if the realisation that she couldn’t fight against her whole family occurred to her, she came to give them both a kiss. ‘What can I say?’ she exclaimed, and there was reluctant defeat in her eyes. ‘I hope you’ll both find the happiness you deserve.’
EPILOGUE
‘CAN I go in the pool again, please?’
Sean dragged the word out and his father and stepmother exchanged a knowing glance.
‘You’ve spent half the afternoon in the pool,’ Olivia pointed out, deciding to play the bad cop for a change. ‘Didn’t your father suggest you needed a rest? If you want to come with us this evening, you need to have a sleep.’
‘Well, just five minutes more,’ said Sean wheedlingly. ‘Then I’ll go and rest for a while, I promise.’ He gave Olivia a beaming smile. ‘I know you don’t mind, really. And after all, in a year or so you’ll be wanting me to teach Natalie to swim.’
Olivia patted the baby digesting her feed on her shoulder and pulled a wry face at Joel. ‘That is true,’ she conceded, feeling a quiver in her insides when she met his disturbing gaze. She knew what that look meant and he was getting impatient.
‘OK,’ Joel said abruptly. ‘Five minutes, and then you go to your room. And I don’t want to hear you playing that electronic game when you’re supposed to be resting. Or you’ll be keeping Marsha company tonight.’
‘OK, Dad.’
Sean grinned at both his parents and then dived smoothly into the water. Since coming to the United States, his swimming skills had improved tremendously. But then, having a private pool in their garden was such an advantage. Something they would seriously have to consider when they got back home.
It was just over a year since Olivia and Joel had married again, and so much had happened in those twelve short months.
Their wedding had been a quiet affair, with just their families present. Olivia had worn an oyster silk dress, which swirled about her knees, and carried a bouquet of roses and white baby’s breath, that had proved to be quite prophetic in the circumstances.
Sean had acted as both pageboy and best man, his own delight enhanced by the new arrangements that had been made for his care. His mother and father had agreed to share custody from now on, Louise admitting she’d be grateful for a little time to get used to having their new baby.
Meanwhile, Olivia had found part-time employment with an estate agency in Chevingham. It meant she didn’t have so far to travel and she could easily collect Sean in
the afternoons when he was living with them. It worked really well, satisfying both her need to do something useful and her desire for motherhood.
The fact that Sean got on so well with his stepmother was an added bonus. And Joel, who’d been accustomed to working late into the evenings when he was living alone, found himself leaving the university as early as possible, eager to spend time with his new wife and family.
Then, towards the end of the summer, Joel had been offered a year’s sabbatical in the United States. He’d be attached to a prestigious American university, and it would enable him to study their technology as well as giving him the opportunity to lecture to a different student faculty.
It had been a wonderful offer, and Olivia hadn’t hesitated before encouraging him to take it. His wife and family were expected to accompany him, of course, and a house in a small town just outside Boston had been put at their disposal for the duration of their stay.
Naturally, Sean had wanted to go with them, but Joel had explained that it wouldn’t be fair to his mother to take him away for so long. However, a compromise had been reached: Sean had joined them at Easter, flying the Atlantic on his own, to the envy of all his friends.
Olivia’s own news had had to wait until they were settled in Massachusetts. The revelation that she was expecting a baby had filled them both with excitement and apprehension. But, in the event, their fears were groundless. Olivia had had a perfectly normal pregnancy. Their baby daughter, whom they’d called Natalie, had been born in the hospital in North Plains, instantly gaining the love and attention of both her parents and her brother.
Their year in the United States would be over in October, and, although Olivia would be sorry to leave, she was looking forward to going home. They had still to show off baby Natalie to both her grandparents and her aunt and uncle, and, despite Sean’s dismay at leaving the swimming pool and the friends he’d made at his school in North Plains, he was full of excitement at the thought of telling all his English friends of the experiences he’d had and the places he’d seen.
His swim over, Sean went to take his shower and to have a nap, and Joel lifted Natalie out of his wife’s arms and cradled the little girl against his chest. Natalie was three months old and thriving, and Joel had just watched Olivia feeding her, an experience he found both distracting and stimulating.