by May Peterson
I plunged down to the waist of his trousers, fumbling with the buckle. Lapping up his body heat like blood, I ripped the belt open. A satisfying clatter followed. “Oops. Almost broke that. If I damage any of your clothes you can send me the bill.”
He only chuckled.
He felt good. All but completely naked against me, skin smooth and inviting, his delicate frame vibrating. The tips of his fingers stroked my back, hair, dotting me with pleasant cold. His breath flared with urgency.
“Turn around.” My request rumbled like a growl.
He obeyed, my hands all over him, positioning him so his hips fit against my groin. I had no intention of hiding my erection, instead making sure it was centered on his firm, round ass. Sweet fucking ripe peach.
No teeth. I didn’t want even a suggestion that I might want his blood. Easy enough, because I didn’t, but it might have usually been exhilarating to nip him a little. Instead, I gently fisted one hand in his hair, holding just enough that his head was tilted up. A shivering gasp escaped his mouth. My tongue trailed down his neck, shoulders. And with my free hand, I slipped into his pants, peeling them down his thighs.
A mirror would have been perfect just then. Hei, stripped bare-ass naked except for a band of rolled cloth, my fingers underneath to keep control of my motions. His hair in my grip, breath heavy and trembling. From my vantage, I traced an amazing flush down his cheeks and the hollow of his décolleté.
I spoke so he’d feel the purr in my throat. “I want you too.”
He arced, that pretty bottom rubbing harder on my cock. Fuck. That was just about perfect. He took hold of my hips behind him, used them for leverage as he ground his backside into me. He was practically mewling. “Please. Ari.” Gasps punctuated his speech, and honestly—hearing him say my name was delicious. “Please fuck me. Fuck my ass. I want you inside me.”
Goddamn. He might as well have been grating my mind into ribbons, slowly reshaping it into a knot of desire. Fuck, fuck. “All right.” I had to control my breath, keep it even enough to speak. “I want to fuck you too. But I didn’t bring anything to...ease the way.”
He tried to turn around, as if to face me, but the motion was relaxed enough that I accepted an impulse—seizing his neck like a puppy’s, reverting him back into position. Naked ass against me, the sweet curve of his spine just under where my mouth rested. He whimpered. “I—I...please. I’ll do anything.”
Holy shit. Think, Ari. I couldn’t risk hurting him. Maybe we could get close. With quick efficiency, I opened and slid down my own leggings. The underpants followed suit, and I kicked both off, enjoying the rush of nudity.
That first instant of unclothed contact was like dipping my senses in liquid sex. His ass was so smooth, tight, radiating so much heat. My sensitivity jumped, the suddenly throbbing flesh of my cock slipping into his cleft and finding purchase there. It took no time at all for a wet streak to form, my pre-come slicking between his buttocks. The feeling of my cock bare seemed to push him to the edge. He began whimpering more loudly, his body humming with tension.
Fuck. I craved him so badly it was painful. I wanted to hear him squeal with delight. I wanted my whispers to leave a mark. “Hey. Hold still.”
He did, though it was impossible to fully obey, as severely as he was shaking. But it was easy enough to spit a few times in my hand, then massage the saliva between my member and his cleft. Soon I was sliding back and forth with ease, and the flash of heat and quivering flesh told me I was grazing his asshole. Mm. Perfectly smooth. I wanted to bend him over, take a good look at that tight little ring. But then I’d have to stop fucking against him, and it didn’t seem worth it at the moment.
“Will I see you again?” My voice didn’t seem recognizable to me, it was so low and thick with lust.
Hei hesitated, maybe trying to think through his arousal. “If you want to. Ari. Please, I—I want to see you again.”
A vibration rolled from my chest. “Good. Then we can save the penetration for later. For now, just follow my lead. No reason we can’t enjoy this as it is. All right?”
His nod seemed almost desperate. But I began grinding on him with even more force. As I did, my slicked hand snaked around to cup his cock and balls. Ahh. The warmth and softness of his genitals, the way they were so completely surrounded by my palm and fingers—fuck yes. Except for his member, extending past my wrist. His cock was somehow elegant, slim but long. Impressively long. And the shape of his bulbous tip was incredibly satisfying. I just rubbed, front and back, as I mounted toward orgasm.
I was going to make him come until he was breathless, and leave his cleft so wet he’d be dripping. God yes.
“Bend over.” My words crawled over him before I realized I’d said them. But in time with my motions, he tipped forward. Bracing against the wall over the bench, one hand steadying him. I held him around his chest, my legs bracing us. I kept working his groin, having slicked his cock enough that my fist glided around it. And I fucked his hot cleft, reveling in how close I kept hitting to his hole. So fucking wet and ready and smooth—
Hei gasped so intensely that it shocked me. The sound dissolved into a chain of moans, pleas, half-breaths. “Ari, Ari, please, oh, ahh—” In the next instant, his cock became almost too wet to hold. His semen all but burned, squelching between my fingers, down into his thighs. I fucked against his perineum, the come lubricating me even more. The sensation would eat me alive if I kept this up. It was so much, so strong—
Tension wracked me, and I hurriedly took his earlobe in my mouth, sucked on it. He yelped. That threw me like a stone over the edge of my climax. Pleasure drowned me, turned everything white and clear.
Then I was panting raggedly into his shoulder, saliva oozing down his neck from his ear. His come and mine soaked the place between his thighs and buttocks. Like I’d claimed it, covered it in me.
Hei’s breaths bordered on sobs now, but he held on to me. Fingers wound with the hand that was on his chest.
We didn’t need to separate right away. The force of the orgasm had cleansed my senses somehow, left everything feeling damp and gentle. Carefully, I guided him down, sat and maneuvered him into my lap. I was being presumptuous, too, it seemed—but it felt right. And his responses were relaxed, welcoming. I held him, enclosed in my embrace. Trying to ease the sense of vulnerability that was probably filling him.
He rested his head on my chest. “Thank you.”
I smiled into his hair. “Don’t think I was being too selfless, there. Was I too rough with you? Did you like it?”
His sweat and come smelled good. He squirmed a little, turned to tuck more easily in my arms, and the scent surrounded me. “You’re sweet. I...very much liked it. Every second.”
Sweet. Hm. May be the first time I’d been called that. At least in Serenity. I smirked, then drew my spattered hand to my mouth and began licking his come off. I didn’t always fancy this, especially not with so much at once—but the intensity of it all, the salty taste, made my head swirl pleasantly.
Hei covered his face as if in embarrassment, laughing softly. “Oh, god. That’s...arousing.” He looked up again, the sunshine back in his smile.
That was good to see. I watched him for a few moments. “Did you mean what you said? That you want to...meet again?” I couldn’t quite force myself to phrase it more nakedly than that. Do you really want me?
His bright aura dimmed slightly, becoming more serious. The nod he gave was slow, deliberate. “Yes.”
My breath was speeding up again. “All right. We should decide a time and place to meet, maybe?”
Hei cast a gaze around the empty building. “What about here again? Especially if it’s usually this empty. Let’s say midnight, tomorrow night.”
That was soon. I couldn’t restrain the grin that rose on my face. “Midnight it is, then. But I can think of a few more amusing places we could go, if you�
�re up for it.”
He purred agreement. We began gathering up our clothes. This felt like a natural end to the encounter. He got up to put his trousers back on, and I snuck glances at the sinuous curve of his back while he moved. Those arms, the lines of his body, still struck me. I gulped, and followed one more impulse. “Why did you come here? If you’re willing to say.”
He turned, mouth opening and then closing again. Consideration furled his brow, and he paused to pull his shirt on. Wow. Maybe I’d actually caught him off guard, for once. When he lifted his eyes to me, a wry expression lit them. “Maybe I’ll tell you, the next time we meet. Something to keep things interesting. Along with us fucking.”
I took his hand and squeezed it. “Yes. That part, definitely, will be interesting.”
But eagerness soared through me at the possibility of his answer.
Why had he come here, if he had a life of his own? What was he running from?
And would it give me any idea of what I had been running from myself?
Chapter Four
I had no business being so excited to see Hei again.
It seemed like a simple thing to treasure. Remembering the smell of his sweat. His self-conscious smiles, eagerness, ambiguity, and boldness. I never seemed able to shake the embarrassment at the intensity of my feelings, and in this case it felt especially juvenile of me. But it felt good for once to look forward to company.
Until I tried to sleep, and the reality of it settled over me like dust. If he really had been hoping to find me last night, he’d risked much to do it. And while I’d helped him, it didn’t fundamentally change who I was. I was a creature of Serenity, no matter my intentions, and that I’d helped him didn’t make me safe for him.
But I had taken a stand. One I would have to pay for. And maybe that would earn me something like restitution.
It was shortly after midnight. I’d actually managed to pile up some sleep for once, and so naturally overslept. I flew to the agreed on spot; when the empty bar entered my sight, lit as if signaling that Hei was in wait, I descended. And it felt like my insides were full of stones. I was this attached already to someone I barely knew.
Who are you, Hei?
My tongue felt stuck to the roof of my mouth as I landed and nudged the door with one wing. The excitement at seeing him again was now wrapped around a belly-deep dread.
The shadows moved, and I turned to catch Hei’s head lifting—he was crouched in the corner. This time, an ecru wrap draped his limbs over a pair of black trousers, and a pouch hung from one shoulder. He sat with arms around his knees, eyes wide and defenseless as they fell on me.
“Ari.” He pronounced it just a little shakily, with a timid smile. “I—I was afraid you may not be coming.”
Fuck. How long had I kept him waiting? I swallowed. “No. I promise I didn’t forget, but it’s no excuse. Can you forgive me?”
A slight, abashed chuckle escaped his lips. He swept one hand over the back of his neck, looking down. “There’s no need. It’s fine.” When he met my eyes again, a faint flush colored his cheeks.
My breath felt tight, caged in my chest. I wanted to touch him. Just make contact for now, run my fingers where his were. Over his nape, in his soft hair, watch his eyes flutter as I stroked him.
He rose tentatively, fingers pawing at his belongings. “Ari, I didn’t mean—I can leave you be, if you need that. No commitment was intended.”
“No.” I sighed. I’d had more than enough time alone. Stepping forward, I opened my hand. “I was looking forward to this. But we don’t have to do anything in particular. Is there anything you prefer doing?”
The last bit seemed to draw a faint smile across his lips. It was happening again—the sudden awareness of Hei as strangely above all the detritus of this place, and yet shockingly vulnerable. Fear seemed to lurk in his eyes, one I wouldn’t have seen had I not already witnessed him at the height of emotion. I wondered what might have happened had I arrived any later. If I’d ever have seen him again.
But he carefully took my hand.
“I want you to show me the city.”
His eyes were as wide and round as celebrant moons, as if he knew he was being a little wily and daring me not to find it adorable. What was it that gave him such magnetism?
“I realize you only caught me jumping from a mountainside about a day ago,” he said, grinning so big his teeth shone. “But like I said—I’ve decided I like you. And as charming as it is to wander the ghost-haunted back streets of Serenity alone, I would love to have your dashing winged shoulders by my side. If you’re interested, I mean.”
A smile crawled across my lips involuntarily, making me feel teenage and eager and unable to hide my jumpy emotions.
“I think I made my interest clear last night.” A blush rose in my face; I was trying to be so cool, but I may have been more embarrassed about our bare-assed fucking than he was. I usually wanted my play partners to have a little more distance from me emotionally, because Serenity seemed to call for that. Very few people here were really friends. We were all too busy forgetting. “I should say though, it may be a little risky going about town if Kadzuhikhan is pissed at me. Avoiding another scene seems like a good plan.”
Hei lifted one shoulder. “So take me somewhere we can avoid a scene.”
A breath of laughter puffed from me. “I think a good word for you might be ornery.”
Those wide eyes blinked, his face sweeping with performed, but rather precious, shock. “I do not know what you mean.”
“All right. I am beginning to think you just want an excuse to be flown around.”
“You sure figured me out quickly.” He tucked his arms in close and shut his eyes. “So fly me, my wind chauffeur.”
Rascal.
But I had no complaints. Once again, he felt so good in my arms. His body was warm, like a small live star radiating life force out into the crisp air. It frightened me how eagerly I leaned into his willingly offered touch. I barely knew Hei. We had no history together, no basis for sharing our time other than a chance encounter and a curious attraction. But he felt somehow like the mountains on the other side of the world Tamueji and I had talked about. Like his vibrantly pulsing energy was shaping the weather of my life, of my mind, and perhaps had been shaping it for a long time without me knowing it was real.
Moon-souls like me were cold. It was an odd contradiction; we were called the living-again for a reason. We defied death, represented its opposite. But our rebirth grew from the Deep, the cold and sleepy world of ghosts and the dead. The Deep was black and quiet and peaceful as dreamless slumber, and some of its gentle cold lived in our bodies. The touch of every moon-soul I knew had a slight chill to it. We had enough vitality to withstand centuries of time, but lacked the intense heat that our fragile mortal kindred exuded.
Hei thus felt so much more mortal, but so much more alive. The contrast made me realize everything Serenity was to me: constant, persistent, but ice-like and unfeeling. Hei was the opposite—fleeting, but shining like a flower in the sun.
I missed this. Never as a dove-soul had I held a mortal lover in my arms and taken to the sky, feeling his warmth against my skin. But I missed it like it was something my bones remembered, an echo of something I’d never heard. Nostalgia for sensations that had to be new, but touched me like I was designed to receive them.
As we flew, something occurred to me: I’d just thought of Hei as a lover.
I settled for a midair market. These were airy parts of the city built on stilts, walkways, and squares supported by higher towers or ledged to the sides of the mountains. They were made for bird-souls, airborne ghosts, and other mobile cityfolk to access at will, even if no stairs led up to them. Perches lined the walkways just as benches might, creating vertical sub-tiers of sitting places over the suspended avenues. This midair market was on the edge of where the sun hit
by midday, creating a space that would receive light without losing its sense of nest-like coziness. Stars glinted in the darkness on one side of the market; behind us, luminous stones dotted the mountain face, giving the feeling of us being enclosed between the velvet pages of a jeweled book.
Hei found his footing quickly and stayed just under my wing. His delighted expression said he hadn’t seen a place like this in Serenity yet. The walkway boards gleamed like lacquer, and a flow of agile bird-souls—crow and dove—as well as schools of powdery ghosts shimmered by. It lent the place the atmosphere of somehow being underwater while high in the mountain air.
“This is quite a view,” he breathed, rotating to take it all in.
“Bird’s-eye view, to be specific.” I folded my wings against my back. Without warning, Hei reached out and tucked his hand in mine. He did this casually, as if it was the most natural thing in the world for us to hold hands. I gripped back almost by reflex, but there was nothing casual about it for me. My heart thudded in escalation.
Had I ever been infatuated before? I had no memory of it, but like his warmth, it was nonetheless a sensation I recognized and missed. Infatuation was almost certainly what this was. Hei would very likely lose interest in me eventually, and pass on from this place like another ghost, taking his heat and vibrance with him. But it didn’t matter. The sun burned me a little each time I let it touch me. It was still better than an infinity of cold.
“I don’t know about you,” he said, tugging me after him, “but I’m in the mood for a drink. Where’s a good spot here?”
I sniffed out a pleasant little bar that was open to the flow of the market, a cozily lit place with a rock ceiling set with glowing stones. Small round tables sat under the rock clusters, creating the feeling of sitting in an enormous jewelry box. We ordered wine and an assortment of dishes, ranging from fried prawns to vinegared fish, fermented sea vegetables to crispy rice. Hei tucked in with impressive gusto, emptying his first bottle in minutes.