“You don’t have to do that, Ed,” she said gently. “I’m okay. I’ve just been very sad.”
“That’s understandable. But now we need to get you un-sad, or at least feeling better. Do you like the ballet?” he asked, and she nodded. “I have season tickets and no one ever wants to go with me. Marielle hates it. I waste the tickets most of the time. We’ll do that one night. And maybe a play.” It sounded above and beyond the call of duty to her, and she felt guilty taking up his time. It was already nice enough that he stopped in to see her every day on his way home from the office. She was familiar with her father’s will now. He had left everything in such good order that there were very few decisions to make, except about where she wanted to live. She was still living at home, and had never had her own apartment, and didn’t want to, especially now. She wanted to live in theirs forever. But she felt lost and alone in the big apartment. She was grateful that Sam still stayed there with her most nights, but eventually he would get tired of that too, or his parents would complain. They had been sympathetic so far, and hadn’t objected. But Sam hadn’t had a date or a night off in two months, except when she’d had dinner with Ed at La Grenouille. He asked her about it the next day.
“Did it go okay with Ed last night?”
“It was very nice. We had a good dinner and came home early. It was kind of nice to be out.”
“We could do that too, you know, start eating at restaurants.” They’d been eating the meals Theresa left for them for two months, and sometimes Sam brought in burgers or pizza. Coco didn’t care what she ate. She nodded at his suggestion, but he could see that she didn’t really want to go out for dinner. She watched movies with him at night now, which was a good distraction.
On Friday, Ed’s secretary called her again, and said he would come by for her at seven-thirty. She said they were going somewhere informal this time, and Coco felt awkward refusing, so she didn’t.
She sent Sam a text that she was seeing Ed again. She wore black jeans and a sweater, and Ed took her to a small cozy Italian restaurant. She had a nice time with him, and he called her on the weekend afterward to see how she was. She was sounding better, and more like herself. She went for a long walk in the park with Sam both days. The weather was still warm and it felt good to be out in the air. She felt like an invalid who was slowly recovering from a terrible accident.
Sam had to have dinner with his family on Sunday night, and he’d been home for Shabbat when she had dinner with Ed on Friday. She was surprised when shortly after Sam left on Sunday, the doorman rang and said that Mr. Easton was on his way up.
“Is everything okay?” She looked surprised when she let him in.
“Fine. I was just thinking about you, so I thought I’d drop by. Is Sam here?”
She shook her head and smiled. “I gave him a night off.”
“He’s certainly a faithful friend,” Ed commented. He was wearing a black turtleneck sweater and jeans, and looked years younger than he did in a suit. He had a good haircut, and smelled faintly of cologne. She was wearing jeans and a sweater too, with her long dark hair down her back. She looked startlingly pretty, and as usual was unaware of it.
“We’ve been friends since I was nine and he was ten,” she said about Sam. “He’s like my brother.”
“You’re not in love with him?” he asked and she smiled.
“No, we’re just friends.”
“I shouldn’t be,” he said as they sat down in the small den her parents had loved to use, lined with books, with a fireplace. “But I have to admit, I’m relieved to hear it. I thought maybe he was your boyfriend.”
“Not at all. Why are you relieved?” she asked innocently, and he moved slightly closer to her on the couch, and put an arm around her casually. She didn’t feel threatened by it. He was a familiar figure to her now, more than ever, like Sam, except there was something subtly different about the way Ed looked at her, and she wasn’t sure what it meant. He had been very attentive to her ever since her parents’ death, and taken his role as trustee and advisor very seriously. He looked into her eyes then before answering.
“You haven’t noticed anything, Coco?” he asked gently, speaking softly. “I didn’t want to crowd you while you were getting over what happened. I’m falling in love with you, more every day. I have a hard time staying away from you, and not showing up here every night.” She looked stunned, and before she could react, he kissed her, and felt her body with his strong sensual hands. No man had ever touched her quite that way, or made her body come so alive at his touch. She was breathless when he stopped kissing her, with his hand still on her breast.
“I didn’t…I didn’t realize…” She didn’t know what to say. She had never thought of him that way, and suddenly she didn’t want him to stop. She felt both safe and aroused at the same time. He kissed her again, and then they were lying on the couch together. She’d had sex before, but not often, and it had never felt like this. She felt drunk from his touch. “What are we doing, Ed?” she asked in a small voice. “Marielle?” He was a married man.
“We’ve been over for years. We stayed together for the children, and now we have an arrangement. We have an understanding. For all intents and purposes, I’m a free man.” She felt better when he said that, and only mildly guilty when she abandoned herself to him. He smelled wonderful, he was so handsome, and he knew exactly how and where to touch her. She had never thought of him this way before. Even before he took her clothes off, she could sense that he was an expert lover. And then suddenly, they were making love, and she felt as though she were flying through space with him. He drove her to the edge of ecstasy and then pulled her back, then led her to the edge again, he played her body like a finely tuned instrument. When it was over finally, she knew that something extraordinary had happened between them. She lay in his arms smiling at him, and he kissed her again, more peacefully that time.
“I’ve never felt for any woman the way I feel about you,” he said with raw emotion in his voice, ran a finger down her belly again, and touched her irresistibly. And then it all started again.
They made love until midnight, and then wandered into the kitchen naked, and ate ice cream. It was odd being with him that way, but he made it seem normal and natural. And then he led her to her bedroom, and made love to her one more time.
“I’ve wanted you for so long, Coco,” he said, admiring her afterward. “Sometimes I think your father wanted us to be together, which is why he made me your trustee. It’s almost like being married to you,” he said. “Maybe one day that could happen too. I may be old enough to be your father, but I don’t have fatherly feelings for you, most of the time.” She wondered what her father would have thought, if he would have been pleased, or shocked. He wouldn’t have made Ed her trustee if he hadn’t trusted him completely, which gave some sort of benediction to their union, and made it almost sacred, with her father’s blessing.
“I don’t care how old you are,” she said in a soft, sensual voice. She was dazzled by him, and totally at ease with him. He had introduced her to things she had never done or felt before.
“When can I see you again? I’ll come by for lunch tomorrow.” She nodded, and he finally tore himself away from her at two in the morning, and kissed her longingly again before he left. There were stars in his eyes too.
He came back the next day at lunchtime, and they locked themselves in her father’s office so Theresa wouldn’t walk in on them, and made love on the couch for two hours before he had to go back to the office. It felt crazy and fun and wonderful and exciting. His passion for her was almost frightening at times, and overwhelmed her like a tidal wave, and then gently left her on a beach of softest sand afterward. He was masterful with his tongue and hands.
“I’m so glad you’re not in school,” he whispered to her.
“So am I.” She giggled like the young innocent she was. She wonde
red about his wife at times, but he said it was over between them, and she believed him. He was an honorable man and she knew he wouldn’t be doing this with her if he had a viable marriage.
He lived up to his plan of taking her out to dinner twice a week, and showed up every day at lunchtime. He arrived one night at midnight, after Sam had left, and spent the night with her, which proved to her that he really did have an understanding with his wife, or he couldn’t have spent the night. She never doubted it for a minute. And it was convenient that Sam had recently stopped staying with her at night.
She told no one about what they were doing, although Sam questioned her a few times. But she was careful not to let anything show to him. She didn’t want Sam to know. He had been odd about Ed since her parents died and suspicious of him, almost as if he was jealous.
“Are you okay? You seem so distracted sometimes,” Sam commented. He assumed it was part of the grief process but it worried him.
“I’m fine, I’m feeling better,” she said matter-of-factly, and she looked it. She wasn’t happy again but she seemed healthier and more alive, but she didn’t dare tell Sam what she was doing. He was always uneasy about Ed, and she knew he wouldn’t approve. Either jealous or possessive, or overprotective, like a big brother. And he was young, he wouldn’t understand.
She and Ed had been lovers for two and a half months by Thanksgiving, and she felt as though her whole life had changed. He was the most exciting man she had ever known. He still showed up on Page Six occasionally, which he said was to keep people off the scent. He thought they should remain discreet for as long as possible. He said people would be envious of them, and their thirty-year age difference would cause comment and criticism, which he didn’t want to expose her to.
“It doesn’t matter to me at all,” she reassured him. He was so much more exciting than any boy her age.
“One day, I hope we’ll be married, and we won’t have to explain it to anyone,” he said with a hopeful expression.
“Are you really going to get divorced?” She looked impressed. He had mentioned it several times. She didn’t feel guilty because he was so clear that their marriage had been over for years. And the idea of being married to him was exciting and made her feel safe.
“I was going to get divorced anyway. Tell me when you’re ready, and I’ll file.” She felt too young to be married, and she didn’t think it would be proper to marry less than a year after her parents’ deaths, and he agreed when she said it to him. “We’ll talk about it next summer then. I can hardly wait,” he said, pulled her close to him, and kissed her to seal the deal.
She spent Thanksgiving with Sam and his family, while Ed was at his Connecticut home with his. In the December issue of Vogue, there was a handsome photograph of him with Marielle at their country estate, which he said had been taken in the summer before he got involved with Coco. He said they had agreed to the interview to keep up appearances for their children’s sake. The photograph meant nothing, he said, and Coco believed him. She had no reason not to. He had never lied to her. He and her father were both honest men.
Their dinners at La Grenouille became more and more regular. They went to the Italian restaurant often too. He came by frequently at midnight, when he said he couldn’t bear the night without her, and Sam always left around eleven. Sam still came by every evening after work, but didn’t always stay for dinner now. When he did, he left before Ed showed up, but he had no idea she was seeing Ed. She kept it a secret. Ed went to the country on weekends and said he did work there, and could get more done than in the city. For Christmas he gave her a Cartier love bracelet set with diamonds, and a matching ring that looked like a wedding band. When Sam questioned her about it, she said it was her mother’s. Ed had put the bracelet on with a little golden screwdriver that came with it, so she couldn’t take it off. And he said the ring was her promise ring, with better things to come in future, once people knew about them. They had no set plan about when to tell them.
He went skiing in Switzerland with his children over Christmas. It was a hard time for Coco without her parents, but since Sam’s family didn’t celebrate it, he spent the time with her, so she wasn’t alone. Ed came by to say goodbye to her before he left for Europe, and Sam was there and after he left, Sam looked at her strangely.
“Is something going on with you and Ed?” It had hit him like a bolt of lightning when he saw them together. The look in Ed’s eyes gave him away.
“Of course not. Why would you say that?” Coco said, looking uncomfortable. They had kissed stealthily when he got on the elevator. He was on his way to the airport. A car was waiting for him downstairs with his bags.
“He looks at you like he owns you,” Sam said, suspicious.
“Don’t be silly. He’s my trustee.”
Sam looked at her intensely. “Be careful, Coco. He scares me. I think he’s a player. I smell it from a mile away.” But since Sam was as innocent as she was, she paid no attention to him. And she was determined not to tell him the truth. It was her secret with Ed. It was the first time she had ever lied to Sam, and she felt guilty about it. Her birthday was a few days before Christmas, and she spent it quietly with Sam. She didn’t want to celebrate it, so they had dinner at home.
Ed called her on her birthday, on Christmas Day and New Year’s Eve, and texted her in between. He had business in London for a week after the holidays, and by the time he returned, she hadn’t seen him for almost three weeks. He barely got through the door the first time he saw her, before they were making love all over the apartment and finally made it to her bed.
“Oh my God, I missed you so much. It was unbearable without you. I can’t go away without you again.” But he did, to Saint Bart’s in February, on a yacht with friends, for Easter in Rome, with his children again, and in June, he mentioned in passing that he had rented a house in Tuscany for two months, so his children and their spouses and his grandchildren could come and go. For the first time, she looked at him questioningly.
“Will Marielle be there too?”
“Who knows with her? She does what she wants and makes her own plans. Although she’ll want to see the children too. I think she’ll be on a boat in Greece in July. Maybe you and I can go somewhere then.”
“Are you still planning to divorce her?” Coco said quietly. She had decided not to go back to school for spring semester either, and she had done nothing in the past nine months except make love with Ed and watch TV with Sam.
“I’m not sure this is the right time. She’s had some health issues. But it’s certainly a possibility. Maybe in the fall,” he said, reaching for her, and she pulled away.
“I don’t want to be rude, Ed, but I don’t want to be your piece on the side. I still see you on Page Six a lot, and you were in W with Marielle last month when you went to Spain to see friends. You didn’t tell me she was going to be with you. I think you’re more married than you’ve told me.” She had thought it for a while, and wondered if Sam was right. Ed had the perfect arrangement in hiding with her. No one had any idea that they were involved, and he could have her whenever he wanted. She had been his willing plaything for nine months. The anniversary of her parents’ death was in a month, by which time, he had said, he wanted to marry her. She was beginning to think he was playing her for a fool, with Marielle’s “health issues,” which made it a bad time to file for divorce, and a house in Tuscany for two months, where his wife would be too. Coco stared at him and he didn’t flinch or falter.
“The only one I love is you. How can you doubt that?”
“I don’t. But I think you are still very married, and possibly intend to stay that way. You’ve had plenty of time to do something about it since September, and you haven’t.”
“I’ll do it in the fall,” he promised.
“I don’t believe you,” she said bravely. Everything about him was exciting. He lived a jet-se
t life, but he shared that life with Marielle, not with her. Maybe Sam was right and he was a player. If so, the joke was on her, and he had taken advantage of the fact that he was her trustee, and she was a naïve twenty-two-year-old girl. She was not in his league. But she was not a fool.
“I’m not so sure my father would have liked this,” she said quietly and firmly. “Or that you’d have done this if he were alive. You were his partner. He trusted you.”
“I think you’re being unfair,” he said, looking sullen, as he got out of bed, walked across the room, and reached for his clothes.
“I don’t think I’m the one being unfair here, or dishonest. I’m not married and staying that way. You are. If you loved me and were honest, you’d have seen a lawyer by now.” She was very clear about it. It had been troubling her for a while, and she had finally said it.
“I have seen a lawyer,” he insisted, but he looked like he was lying now, even to her. “He advised me to wait.” When he said that, she could see what he was, and what he was doing. It was all a game to him, and who knew how many others there were, the women he was in the papers with, whom he claimed were only decoys. She suddenly felt like an idiot and realized that he had treated her like one. He dressed and she didn’t stop him. Then he came toward her, and tried to caress her and she moved away.
“I think we need to stop until you get your life in order. I love you. But I’m not stupid, Ed. This has been easy for you.” She had been constantly available to him for almost a year.
“And you had something better to do?” he said sarcastically, and it hit her like a slap. “Like movie nights with your little friend Sam? I’ve wined and dined and entertained you for the last year, with the best sex you’ll ever have.” There was a mean look in his eyes she hadn’t seen before, and what he said was rude and disrespectful.
“Is that all it is? You abused my father’s trust and mine, and took advantage of the fact that I have no family and no father to defend me now. I trusted you, but maybe I was wrong.” She seemed suddenly very grown up and felt it as she faced him. She was shaking, but he didn’t know. It took courage to challenge him, and she loved him now.
All That Glitters Page 4