Chapter 10
Nigel was very careful with her once Coco let him back into the house. He was walking on eggshells, and she was hypervigilant. He took her to see the results at the house in Sussex, and it was as beautiful as he said. They still had to furnish it, but everything was done, and the grounds were larger than she remembered.
It took her two weeks to admit to Leslie that she had let him come back. Leslie looked leery about it, but wished her the best. Her business was growing, and Coco had become an important part of it. Their clients loved her, and Coco had discovered that she had a knack for decorating, like her mother. Leslie said she had real talent, and great follow-through. Every client had been satisfied so far.
Two weeks after he moved back in, Nigel begged her to give a Christmas party, to christen their new home. She still felt tentative with him, and she wasn’t feeling festive, but she finally let him talk her into it, as long as they kept it down to fifty or sixty good friends. She didn’t want to give a big showy bash. He was disappointed, but he agreed. They chose the guest list carefully. It was made up of the people they were closest to. It grew to seventy-five easily, but Nigel said that some of them wouldn’t show up.
She turned twenty-four a few days before the Christmas party, and she didn’t want to celebrate her birthday this year either. It was taking her time to feel close to him again, but she was getting there, and was slowly starting to trust him again.
Sam had been worried about her ever since she’d told him that Nigel was back. He thought it was a terrible mistake. In his opinion, Nigel was not going to change.
She called to wish him a happy Chanukah, and he asked her how things were going.
“A little wobbly, but basically okay. I feel like the KGB watching him. I don’t know if it will ever be the same again. I guess people go through worse. What about you? Will everyone come home for Chanukah?” They usually did, but she could hear that he was down.
“My mother won’t let either of my sisters come, she’s so mad at them. Rebecca converted, and Sabra and Liam will be married in April in a Catholic church. So it’s just me and Jacob this year, and my parents. They’re putting the heat on me pretty heavily about Tamar. We’ve been dating for a year and a half and they say I’m disrespecting her. They think that I owe it to her to marry her after this long, and I’ll humiliate her in the community if I don’t. I’m not even sure why I go out with her, except she’s a nice girl and a good person. She helps my father with our books. My mother loves her. Tamar wants to have a million babies, and will keep a kosher home. I feel like I’ll turn into my parents if I marry her, and she’ll become my mother. It’s everything I said I didn’t want.” He sounded tortured over it. “But I keep seeing her because it’s easy and she’s always there.”
“So?” The answer seemed obvious to Coco. He didn’t want to marry her and he wasn’t in love with her.
“I feel so damn guilty if I don’t marry her. She’s so willing and accommodating and I’ve been lazy. I should have stopped dating her a year ago, but I didn’t. My mother says they’ll be disappointed in me if I don’t marry her. Classic Jewish guilt.”
“Don’t disappoint yourself,” Coco said firmly. “That’s more important. You have a right to marry who you want.”
“I don’t want to marry anyone right now. I’m not even sure I’ve ever been in love.”
“Lucky for you,” she said, and he laughed. She always made him feel better, even from three thousand miles away.
“My father says that marrying her is the honorable thing to do, after dating her for all this time. They’ve probably guessed I’m sleeping with her, so I’ve defiled her.”
“It’s only a year and a half, not ten for chrissake, and she could have stopped seeing you.”
“She’s in love with me. And I’m comfortable with her. But is that enough?”
“No, it’s not. If you want comfortable, get a dog, or have lunch with your grandmother. Don’t you want someone more exciting?”
“Exciting doesn’t last. It’s not real. You’ve proven that twice now. And even if Nigel is back, how long do you think it’s going to last? Not forever, that’s for sure.”
“I don’t think forever lasts either. It’s just a word. But you need to feel a thrill when she walks across the room, you need to feel it in your gut, your heart should melt when you see her.”
“Maybe only girls feel those things.” He laughed.
“That’s bullshit. So do guys.”
“I don’t know. She’s a good person, she’d be a good wife and mother. She’ll keep a kosher home, which will make my parents happy.”
“And you miserable,” she reminded him. “Think of it. You’ll never eat bacon and shrimp again.” He laughed. “You’re too young to settle, and do what your parents want. Sam, think about it. This is your life, not theirs.”
“It’s hers too. And they’re nagging me day and night.”
“They’re brainwashing you to marry the girl they want.”
“Sometimes that works,” he said, sounding depressed about it. “A lot of Jewish families had arranged marriages. My grandparents did. I think they were happy.”
“This is the twenty-first century. You can’t let them do this to you.”
“I’m twenty-five years old. They think I should be married and having kids by now.”
“My parents got married at twenty-two. They’re the only people I know who pulled it off. Today that doesn’t work. Look at the mess I just made, and I was in love with him when we got married.”
“But you go for the exciting ones. That’s a big mistake. The exciting ones never last. The boring ones probably do. She won’t cheat on me. She’ll be pregnant all the time.”
“Sam, wake up! Don’t do something stupid. This is your future you’re talking about. Sixty years maybe. Possibly seventy.”
“And they’re my parents. I’m supposed to honor them too.”
“You’re breaking my heart.”
“Now you sound like my mother. She says that to me twenty times a day.”
“Go out and get laid, or drunk or something. Have a ham sandwich.” He laughed but she could feel that she was losing the battle. “One of us has to marry the right person. And I think you’re it.”
“Maybe she is the right person.”
“For someone else,” Coco said, pleading with him, but his parents had beaten him down, and he sounded confused. They talked for a long time and then he had to go to dinner with them. She wished him a happy Chanukah, and promised to call him in a few days. Her heart was aching for him when they hung up. He deserved so much better than Tamar.
* * *
—
The Christmas party Nigel and Coco gave in their new home was beautiful. They got a Christmas tree and their florist decorated it for them with antique angels. Nigel hired carolers to sing as the guests came in. Now that he was back, he was billing everything to Coco again, which was lucky for him. He’d been down to his last few hundred pounds when she relented and let him come home. The buffet was delicious, with plenty of caviar. People showed up in good spirits, and were vastly impressed by the house. In the end, they had sixty people, which felt right to Coco, although Nigel was disappointed that more people hadn’t shown up. But it was snowing and freezing cold, so some guests stayed home, or had other parties to go to.
Coco and Nigel were getting along better than they had in a long time. He was very careful not to upset her. He gave her a gold bracelet for Christmas that he had paid for himself with a credit card.
He hadn’t started looking for a job yet, but promised her he would after New Year’s. And she promised not to nag him about it until then. They went to midnight mass together on Christmas Eve, and she gave him the espresso machine he had wanted, and an Hermès sweater. They planned a ski weekend for their anniversary in January, and a week
before that, something occurred to Coco that she hadn’t thought about before. She stopped at the pharmacy on her way to work, bought a test kit, and wanted to do it at the office, so he wouldn’t be around. It had just dawned on her that she hadn’t had a period since November, before Nigel had moved back in. She didn’t know what she wanted while she waited for the test to give her the answer. She didn’t feel ready for a baby yet, but maybe that was what they needed now, to stabilize their marriage. It had been a tumultuous year. She was shocked when the test was positive, even though she suspected that it might be. She was happy and terrified all at the same time.
She didn’t say anything to Leslie. She wanted Nigel to be the first to know. She knew it was what he wanted, and would bond them to each other for life, a child. It was a sacrifice she was willing to make for him, even if it seemed too soon to her, and she felt too young. She sped home in her car between appointments, and told Leslie she’d be right back. She didn’t want to wait until that night to tell him.
She let herself into the house as quietly as she could, and raced upstairs to surprise him. She could hear him in his office, talking to someone, presumably on the phone. She knocked gently on the door and walked in, and a naked blond woman was sitting on the desk, while Nigel made love to her. She was moaning, and so was he, and saying how much he loved her, which was the conversation she had heard from the stairs. He looked at Coco with horror, withdrew immediately, and held his jeans up in front of him. The girl didn’t know what had happened, and then turned and saw Coco. It wasn’t someone she knew this time, but it didn’t matter.
“I can’t believe this,” Coco said to him, but she did believe it. She had been afraid of exactly this happening again. “I came home to tell you that I’m pregnant, you son of a bitch,” she said, picked up a book and threw it at his head, and narrowly missed him.
“Coco, please!” he said with a tortured look.
“Not this time,” she said in an icy tone. “You can both get the fuck out of my house. Now!” The girl scurried off to the bathroom with her clothes in her arms, and Nigel stood staring at her.
“Are you really pregnant?” He looked shell-shocked. Again.
“It doesn’t matter now. Just go. Both of you. I’ll come back with the police if you don’t.” And he knew she would. Then she turned around and ran down the stairs. She went back to the office and didn’t say anything to Leslie, she was too upset. And when she went home at six o’clock, he was gone. He had taken his computer, and some clothes. He knew she meant business. She didn’t cry this time. It was over. She was dead inside, except for a baby she didn’t want now. And she didn’t want him either. He had killed everything she had ever felt for him, and he had made a fool of her again for loving and trusting him.
She lay awake that night, and called the lawyer in the morning, to file the papers. She didn’t know what she was going to do about the baby, but she could figure that out in a few days.
* * *
—
Two days after Nigel left, she was sitting, staring out the window at first light, when she heard a text come in. She thought it might be from Nigel, but it wasn’t. She hadn’t heard from him this time. He didn’t know what to say, and was smart enough not to try, and make things worse for himself. The text was from Sam.
“I just got engaged” was all it said, and she was almost as sad for him as she was for herself. It was a dark day for both of them. Her mistake had just ended. And his had just begun. She didn’t have the heart to answer and congratulate him. She was always honest with him. She finally texted a single phrase. “Mazel tov.” His parents had won. He was throwing his life away with a girl they both knew he didn’t love.
The man she had loved and done too much for had thrown her away for another blonde.
Chapter 11
Coco had called her attorney before she did anything else the morning after she found Nigel cheating on her. It had been four months since she had spoken to him and she apologized for the time lapse and not following through before.
“We were trying to work things out again. It’s not possible. He cheated on me again. I want to file for divorce.”
“Remind me how long you’ve been married. It wasn’t long, as I recall.”
“It will be a year next week.”
“That’s excellent, and works well for us. You have to be married a year to file for divorce, as I told you before. So we’ll file next week. All the papers are still in order. I’m glad you’ve moved on this quickly. Even a year is considered a short-term marriage, and won’t impress any judge if your ex-husband makes unreasonable financial demands. And no children.” She didn’t tell him she was pregnant, in case she decided not to keep it. She hadn’t made up her mind yet. “Is there anything else that I should know, that you didn’t mention before?” He was matter-of-fact and methodical, which she liked. And she tried to be as well. She had already given him a copy of their marriage contract, and Ed’s office number in New York for any financial information he needed.
“I’ve caught him having sex with other women, twice. Both times in our home,” she said tersely. There was a brief silence as he considered that, and wrote it down. “I didn’t tell you about the second time before. It happened yesterday.”
“We’ll file on grounds of adultery then. Do you know the women’s names?”
“Only one of them,” the girl from Time magazine.
“And you’re sure you want to file for divorce this time?” he asked her.
“A hundred percent. I gave him another chance. He did it again. I’m not waiting for the third time.”
“That sounds like a wise decision,” he said dryly. “I doubt that he’ll be eligible for spousal support if he asks for it, after less than a year. He’s employed?”
“Not at the moment. He lost his job in June.”
“There seems to be nothing new to add, except that one detail, since we last spoke. I can get the papers over to you today for you to read and verify. The faster you sign them, the faster I can submit them to the court, which seems like it might be a good thing to do in this case.”
“That one detail” was the blonde he’d been having sex with yesterday, she thought as she hung up.
She left the house with a heavy heart, wondering if she should sell it. Even with one baby it would be too big for her, and the house felt cursed. She had never wanted it, and had only bought it to make him happy, which was no longer of interest to her. And there was the house in Sussex. The house in the city had some real value, and had been expensive, but the one in Sussex had been a bargain. She had paid less for it than two weeks on the yacht with ten of his friends. Everything he had done during the year of their marriage had cost her money in large amounts, and allowed him to show off to the people he wanted to impress.
The texts from Nigel started coming once she got to the office. Frantically at first, apologizing and swearing it would never happen again. And with no response from her, they slowed down quickly. Her only text to him stated the name of her lawyer, and to expect to hear from him shortly, and asking for the name of his. She had no other comment on the scene she had walked in on the day before. It hurt less this time. It had been only slightly less dramatic, except for the fact that she was pregnant, and had hoped that he’d be overjoyed, and it might save their marriage. There was nothing left to save now, if there ever had been. She didn’t know anymore. Maybe it had only been about money for him, and had been a setup from the first. He was well versed about what she had from her parents, which he knew from their prenup and had probably culled from the press and gotten off the Internet. Fortunately, their numbers weren’t accurate, but they were bad enough, and a lure to bad guys like him. It was the flash of men like him that always got to her. The dazzle. Of Ed, and now Nigel. Even her own trustee, appointed by her father, had taken advantage of her. In Ed’s case, he had stolen her trust and innoce
nce, Nigel had done the same and upped the stakes by getting her to spend millions for his benefit. At least she had something solid to show for it, and could sell both houses as soon as possible. She didn’t want to live in either of them.
The forms for her to check and sign arrived from her lawyer shortly before noon, and she told Leslie what had happened.
“I’m filing for divorce,” she said matter-of-factly, as Leslie nodded, shocked and sorry for Coco, but no longer surprised.
“I’ve known him since we were kids. I didn’t think he was capable of something like this.” It was highway robbery and manipulation on a grand scale. Coco was young, but she was nobody’s fool. She was onto him now. And Nigel knew it too.
He managed to surprise her again a week later, with an email where he mentioned the name of a lawyer he had hired to represent him. He wasn’t begging to come back this time. He knew she’d never let him, and was turning his attention to more practical aspects now. She read his most astonishing paragraph twice to make sure she had understood it fully.
“If you really are pregnant, as you said, and didn’t just invent that out of whole cloth to hurt me and make the situation worse, bringing up a child is a collaborative venture, and I cannot imagine our being able to cooperate with each other now, given your attitude toward me. I doubt that you would continue with the pregnancy, in these circumstances, but if you do, I would relinquish all parental claim to the result of the pregnancy in exchange for full ownership of our London home. This would be in addition to any financial arrangements and consideration the courts would give me, and not in lieu of.” She assumed that his lawyer had helped him with the language. The idea behind it was pure Nigel, and showed her a total lack of caring and morality. He didn’t even have the decency to refer to it as a baby. Just reading it disgusted her, and she had no intention of giving him anything, let alone an extremely valuable piece of London real estate that she should be able to sell easily. The house apparently meant more to him than his own child.
All That Glitters Page 14