by Robinson, M.
I didn’t dare say his name.
It hurt too fucking much.
His body was so wrapped up in me, we were tangled together on the black silk sheets. He kissed me deeply, headily; I knew he was savoring the new sensation of our skin-on-skin contact. I started to move my hips forward as he thrust in. Our bodies moved in time with one another, getting faster and harder with each second that passed.
It felt like I was on edge the whole time.
About to jump off a cliff.
Into my death.
Where I wouldn’t be with him, but with his brother instead.
I was literally trying to fuck Romeo out of my mind.
My heart.
My body and soul.
“Fuck,” Tristian growled, rotating his hips more demandingly.
I was close to losing it…
All of it.
My sanity.
My truths.
My future.
The past wanted me.
It all intertwined, mixing with the pleasure and the pain. I couldn’t take it anymore. In one swift motion, I let go.
“I’m coming…” I panted against his mouth.
Kissing me passionately, he sent me over the edge, and I took him right along with me. He hid his face in the crook of my neck, kissing my sweaty skin.
Making a single tear roll down the side of my face when I heard him repeat…
“Mine.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
“I am the product of my circumstances. I am the product of my decisions.” —Bane
Eden
Now
One hundred and sixty-eight hours.
Seven days.
One week had passed since Romeo had discovered me in his office.
Since then, he’d kept to himself, which was very unlike him. Especially since he made himself at home in my house.
What was he trying to keep from me?
“Mama, are you okay?”
“Hmm…” I replied, caught off guard as I pulled into Naz’s school.
“You have that face.”
“What face?”
“The one where you’re thinking. Uncle Romeo says you scrunch your nose and bite your lip when you’re thinking really hard about something.”
My hands trembled. How did he know everything? Why? “Is that right?”
“Yep. He says that your eyes get glossy when you’re upset, and they kinda are right now too. Am I in trouble?”
“No. You’re the best boy.”
He smiled.
“What else has Uncle Romeo told you?” I searched for answers I would probably never get, but I craved the information. Or maybe I just needed to know who I was to him, not that it would change anything. He gave me away, which means even if he could have me—he wouldn’t attempt it.
“That you love with all your heart, but I already knew that one because Daddy said it too.”
I winced. I couldn’t help it.
“Do you miss him, Mama?”
I nodded, unable to form the words to lie to him. Visions of Tristian holding that gun, of him claiming me when I asked for him to love me filled my head to the point of dizziness.
“Do you think he misses us?”
“Of course. He misses you the most, though.”
His eyes widened. “How do you know?”
“I’m your mom; I know everything.”
“Do you think Daddy is back to being himself in Heaven?”
I parked the car, waiting for the lane to begin again as my brain whirled with questions. “What do you mean?”
“Daddy. Do you think he’s himself with God?” Such an innocent question, such a difficult answer. How did he even notice the slow shift Tristian had taken? It was so subtle even I had trouble digesting it.
“Naz.” I looked over at him. “I don’t understand what you’re asking me.”
“Well… Daddy was different. He changed a lot.” He shrugged. “He didn’t want to play with me that much, and when he was home, he was always so grumpy. And he yelled at you a lot. I don’t know why. You were always a good mama. Uncle Romeo says that he was stressed, and sometimes that changes people.”
I jerked back, never expecting him to share that.
“Naz, why haven’t you ever said something to me before?” My heart cracked in my chest. I’d failed as a mom, hadn’t I? This entire time I thought I was shielding Naz; instead, he felt and saw everything.
“About Daddy?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t want to make you sad. Your eyes were glossy a lot with Daddy, so I didn’t want to make you sadder. I’m a good boy, right?”
“Always, baby.” I got teary-eyed; there was no helping that either. “Your daddy didn’t make me sad.”
“No?”
“No, bud.”
“Okay. That makes me happy because I miss him a lot. I hope he doesn’t forget about me.”
“That could never happen. You’re too unforgettable.”
His eyes lit up. “That’s what Uncle Romeo said too, Mama.”
Of course, Romeo said that, and I knew in my soul he meant it. “See… everyone knows.”
He smiled wide, the worry residing from his gaze.
“You have a good day at school, okay?”
“I will, Mama. You have a good day too.”
I ruffled up his hair, pulling my car up to the teacher who was on car duty that morning. She opened the door, and Naz jumped out as happy as could be. He waved back and was on his way, running toward his friends who’d been waiting for him.
I sat there in a haze for a few seconds until the blare of the horn honking behind me brought me back to the present. Still mulling over my conversation with Naz, I pulled into traffic shaking my head.
How long had Naz noticed a change in Tristian’s personality?
I thought I was doing a great job at hiding the truth from him, now I felt as though I had failed him as well. The guilt consumed my core while I drove out of the school parking lot. Trying to control the shame I was suddenly overwhelmed with.
When my phone rang, I reached into my purse and answered it. “Hello.”
“We need to talk, Eden. Can you come to my office?”
“Hi to you too, Dad.”
“It’s important.”
“I’m on my way.” I sighed at his seriousness.
He didn’t respond; he just hung up. Which was weird for my father; he was never short with me like that. Fifteen minutes later, I was pulling into his driveway, walking into his office.
“What’s with the short phone call?” I questioned when I saw him sitting behind his desk with an expression I couldn’t place.
He nodded to the chair in front of his desk, and I sat in it. “You’re freaking me out; what’s up?”
“We’re dropping the case for Tristian’s death, and we won’t be pursuing his killer.”
“Wait, what?”
“You heard me, Eden.”
“Not correctly. I think you just told me you’re not looking for my husband’s killer anymore.”
“I did.”
“I don’t understand.” I shook my head. “Why not?”
“It’s none of your concern.”
“None of my concern?” I shot up. “How is my husband’s death not my concern?”
“Eden, calm down.”
“Not until you tell me what the hell is going on!”
“There is nothing to tell you. It’s business.” He was so stoic, like we were talking about dinner, not death.
I pushed him further. “So, his death is related to business then?”
“I didn’t say that,” he snapped.
I put my hands on my hips. “Yeah, you did.”
“Eden, sit down.”
I did as I was told, trying to keep my shit together when all I wanted to do was scream at him. I was tired of everyone treating me like I was a porcelain doll that was going to break.
“What is going on? I have the right to
know.”
“We’re protecting you.”
“From what exactly? Is my life in danger? Is Naz’s?”
“Not anymore.”
“What does that even mean? Can you please stop with the cryptic messages?”
“It doesn’t matter how upset this may get you. We don’t involve wives or children in our business. You were born into this life, Eden. You know how it works.”
I stared, jaw slack. My own father was not only lying to me but brushing me off!
“This is bullshit,” I yelled.
His eyes flashed. “Because you’re angry, I will let that slide, but I don’t need to remind you that I’m your father and won’t tolerate you speaking to me in that manner.”
“Oh my God!” I stood, needing to pace the room. Back and forth I went, reeling in my emotions. “Then I’ll pursue my own case.”
“Excuse me?” his tone was lethal, his expression murderous.
I turned to face him. “I said, I’ll pursue my own case. I’ll find who murdered Tristian. I already saw—”
“—you need to forget about what you saw.” He leaned back into his black leather chair, folding his hands together on top of his desk. “I understand you’re upset.”
“I am more than upset! He was my husband! His murderer deserves to rot in prison.”
He was quiet and then, in a low voice, expressed, “We took care of it.”
I jerked back again; it was like one hit after another. “Then you know who killed him?”
He didn’t say a word.
Not one word.
“Dad! Answer me. Do you know who killed him? My son is going to be raised without a father. I deserve an answer.”
“He has Romeo,” he said, so simply I wanted to scream.
My body flew back as if he slapped me. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Eden, you’re my daughter. I know everything.”
He gave me a look that I was more than familiar with. Making me roll my eyes and take a deep breath. I looked down at the floor, not wanting him to see the expression on my face. I was scared it would give away how I was feeling.
“Is that why Romeo is in my house? You think he’s just supposed to step into Tristian’s shoes, and we’re supposed to be this happy family now?” How dare he, how fucking dare he!
“I don’t know, Eden. You tell me.”
My head was spinning, my heart was racing, my stomach was tumbling.
I couldn’t stop it.
I couldn’t stop this.
My mind and my heart wouldn’t let me as they collided into one terrifying thing. My heart continuing to beat rapidly, hammering in my head and making me feel dizzy.
Lightheaded.
Overwhelmed by everything that was suddenly happening. Everything he was suddenly saying. Feeling like I was being mentally torn in three directions.
His.
Mine.
Tristian’s.
My mind was in overdrive, putting up one hell of a fight with my heart.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” I stated, still not meeting his eyes. Scared it would give me away.
“I never say what I don’t mean. Romeo is in your home to protect you and Naz.”
“From what?”
“Everything.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Your husband is gone; I don’t need to repeat to you what our life is. I will always protect you, and my grandson and the only man I trust to do the job is Romeo.”
“For how long?”
“As long as it takes.”
I was afraid of that. “What?”
“Eden, I’m done having this conversation. I told you what I needed to say, and you needed to know. There is nothing left for me to say to you. You can go.”
“I’m not finished.”
“I have business to attend to,” he informed in a calm voice that basically said, leave as polite as possible.
“Dad… please.” I peered deep into his eyes. “Please tell me what’s going on… I’m going crazy over here.”
I couldn’t breathe.
I couldn’t move.
I could barely even stand.
My eyes pooled with tears, taking in the memories flooding my mind. Each one unfolding in front of me, playing out one by one as I made my way around the room. He wouldn’t answer.
Give me the truth.
Tell me anything I desired to know.
This was my life…
Men protecting me from the monster who lurked in the shadows. But what happens when the monster lurking is also the prince? The hero? The one you want to save you? How do you even begin to protect yourself from that?
“Please… first it’s Romeo with taking everything from Tristian’s office away from me, then I go to his penthouse to find files of Tristian on his computer. What is going on? Please…”
My request was cut short when my mom started calling for him from the speaker in his office.
He pressed the intercom button. “I’ll be right there.”
“Daddy…”
“I’ll be right back.”
He left, leaving me alone. It couldn’t be any more perfect. My feet were moving on their own, and before I knew what I was doing, I opened one of the drawers, seeing nothing that would be of use to me. I reached in, moving everything to see if I could find something that may answer all my insecurities.
Nothing.
Nowhere.
I couldn’t find one fucking thing.
Staring up at the ceiling, I breathed out, “God, please help me.”
As if answering my prayers, a cellphone dinged with a text message. Not just any cellphone…
My father’s.
I walked toward it, feeling like this was the moment where the truth would make itself known. I didn’t know why, but each step that brought me closer to his phone had me questioning everything. Until finally, I picked up his phone. Swiping it over, unlocking his screen with the code he had used since I was a little girl.
Written in plain sight was the truth.
Never in a million years did I think…
The truth wouldn’t set me free.
Instead, it buried me alive.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
“Stuck in a generation where loyalty is just a tattoo, love is just a quote, and lying is the new truth.” —Mr. Villain Quotes
Romeo
She was late.
And I was turning into one of those annoying as hell people who constantly checked their phone and looked out the kitchen window for her SUV.
Nothing.
Naz’s school had been over for hours, and it wasn’t like her to just keep him out.
He was always starving after school, so unless she took him to eat and then shop, which he hated, something was wrong. I’d called her father only to get a grunt on the other line, which made me wonder if I should put on a cup and pray she didn’t have good aim.
Things had been better.
When I had found her in my apartment, I was more surprised at first that she’d taken the initiative to look into things, and then annoyed that the only thing my brain could focus on was that we’d been alone in my apartment and that my bed hadn’t seen any female in it—ever.
I never brought women back to my place.
The very thought that Eden had been a mere few feet from my bedroom, from christening that mattress, had me both unsteady with need and fucking hard as nails.
Hell, even her yelling at me hadn’t made the lust go away. If anything, I wanted her all the more for it.
I loved her anger.
Missed it.
Missed the fire I used to see behind her eyes, the fight that somehow lessened every year she was married to my brother like he somehow stole pieces of her personality until there was nothing left.
At this point, I’d probably welcome a good kick to the balls. At least then I’d know she still felt, she still cared, she was still my Eden.
Min
e.
Headlights flickered in the distance.
I bolted toward the door only to stop a few feet away from it. What the hell was I doing? With a curse, I turned away and braced my hands against the kitchen counter, counting the seconds until the car’s engine turned off.
I measured the steps she took to get to the door—nine.
I sucked in a sharp breath at the twist of the lock.
Tried like hell not to look up when she walked in and clicked the door shut behind her; she locked it as if she was trying to keep someone out when all she ever should have been worried about was letting me in.
Eden peered up then stopped in her tracks like she was frozen in place; her eyes darted behind me to the living room and then back to me again.
Her keys fell to the ground in a loud crash, and I couldn’t tell if she was angry or terrified.
“Eden?” I tilted my head. “Is everything okay? Where’s Naz?”
“Safe,” she snapped while something flashed in her eyes before she picked up her keys and very slowly walked into the kitchen.
She walked right past me.
Which pissed me off.
Hadn’t things been better? “What the hell do you mean safe?”
I reached out and grabbed her wrist, keeping her from going past me.
“Let go,” she whispered, still not looking at me.
“Eden, what happened?”
A tear slid down her cheek. “Nothing.”
“Talk to me.” I squeezed her wrist then tugged her against me until both hands pressed against my chest. “I can keep him safe. I have been keeping him safe, you too, so why isn’t he here? Why are you lying to me?”
She tried pulling away. I pinned my arms around her body and held her close, so close I could feel her heartbeats, measure her small breaths.
“Let go.” Another tear slid down. “Please.”
“I don’t understand.” I shook my head. “I’m here to protect you, and you’re looking at me like I’m going to murder you any second. I would never touch you or Naz, you know that—”
“Good to know we aren’t on your list of people to kill.” Ice dripped off her words. “I won’t ask again, Romeo, let go.”
“Red—”
“Don’t you dare!” she yelled, her eyes flashing. “You don’t have the right to call me that, to claim me, protect Naz or me. You don’t have the right!”
Desperate for answers, I kept her close, my mind trying to piece together what could have possibly happened to get her to this state. “Eden, I can’t protect you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong. Did someone hurt you?”