by catt dahman
It was a horrible feeling, almost was painful. When she looked at the coals of the fire, she saw that they were dull white and the blood was black; there was no color left anywhere. The forest winked away; it was just gone, and there was nothing there but emptiness. The burning cabin vanished. The other cabin, where they had hidden, disappeared; everything around her was just empty and black.
This reality was going away. Why, she didn’t know, but she hadn’t liked most of it anyway.
Maybe Sam had done it, and this reality was no longer possible, but she didn’t want to be nothing. Nothingness was horrifying.
The air vanished, and she couldn’t breathe. Please, God, let me have my memories, as bad as they are; please let me remember and have that much. I’m asking for only a little thing. She could see through her hand and through Kelly. They were vanishing.
She concentrated.
Let me remember.
Remember.
And the ground vanished with them. Nothing was left in that dimension.
Part 3
Chapter 1
In reaching for the unattainable, one suffers the keenest of tortures.
(J. Ellington Ashton)
Part 3
Chapter 2
“Have you heard anything?”
Charlie shook her head and answered, “They keep asking questions and saying it makes no sense at all.”
“They were best friends, so why would Sam kill Mark? That is crazy and have they found the gun Sam was shot with?” Carla asked
“Nope. Luckily I didn’t show residue and didn’t have a drop of blood on me; I was sitting with the housekeeper at the time. I’m clear, but….”
“I guess Mark had an accomplice. I don’t know.” Charlie pulled Dana away to sit in a quiet spot. “This sucks. Sam’s mother is hysterical as are the rest, and I am stoic as best; the people from the law firm are shaken up to lose them both.”
“Well you just be yourself and forget them.”
“Bev, I have something for you.” Bev opened the envelope curiously, and her jaw dropped. “That 50K should help you out. A little birdy told me you could use cash. No payback. I can afford it.”
“I don’t know how to thank you.”
“I don’t want you to thank me, just be happy.”
Bev nodded.
“Now, be expecting a call from a man named Gary today or tomorrow. He owns a security company that did my system, and I showed him pictures of you, and he’s half way in love with you already.”
Bev thanked her over and over. “With me? Pictures, oh no.”
“Bev, he thinks you are gorgeous and wants to talk and maybe set up a date. He’s a nice looking fellow and has a good job, and well, this is what friends are supposed to do.”
“That was generous”
“She needs the money, but I don’t want her to do something dreadful to get it. The guy is perfect for her and wants to meet her and is crazy for her already. She needs a man; we get all the men we need, don’t we?”
Dana frowned, “You’re acting odd, Charlie.”
“Nothing too odd. I just have had strange ideas lately. I think of things I should do differently, and it doesn’t make sense, but I worry about things. Sam and Mark, it doesn’t make sense, and no one can explain, but it’s made me think about how much it would hurt to lose all of you.” Charlie watched Taryn flipping her flowing red hair over a shoulder as she and Anthea gathered plates and cups to take to the kitchen. Both women were in black but were like bright candles in the room, beautiful and shining.
Carla, in a dark pantsuit, was more feminine than usual as she greeted people at the door for Charlie. When no one was looking, she mouthed an obscenity in Mexican about one of the people, making sure only Charlie and Dana saw.
Leila stood outside by the pool with mourners. She nodded at something someone said to her and patted the woman on her arm. She looked concerned, and Charlie silently thanked her for doing that part. Charlie had spent most of her time either disliking Sam or feeling ambivalent towards him and was only beginning to feel there was a caring, generous side to him that she didn’t know. She wished she could have forgiven him and hoped he knew she had.
Charlie saw a judge, a lawyer, and a relative: all going to get cups of coffee or soda. Holly waved to Charlie that she would see to them.
It was calming to know her friends from college had gathered to help her. She waved and smiled solemnly as she walked outside, past the pool and into the gardens. Frannie, full of energy and excited by all the strangers, ran by Charlie and darted into an azalea bush, waiting to see if Charlie would play chase. Bear, the golden retriever from next door, saw the black cat and bounded over to play, nosing into the bush; both ran out towards the woods, playing.
Charlie felt a chill as she watched them go into the woods, but it passed, and she felt relaxed and free.
Under one of the big trees, she paused, enjoying the shade and little breeze that blew through her hair. She noticed a pretty blonde watching her. “Hi.”
“Oh, I didn’t mean to intrude.”
“I saw you at the service. You’re Ginger, aren’t you?”
“I shouldn’t be here; I am so sorry,” Ginger said, but her eyes were also defiant, clinging to some hope.
At one time, Charlie might have had some biting words, but she shrugged and said, “This is about people paying respect to Sam. People he worked with are here, and people he was related to, and people he loved. You belong here.”
“That’s not what I expected to hear. Thank you.”
“He loved you. There was a kind, unselfish part of him, and he was a man who, in the clench, would do the right thing for people. I somehow know that.”
The police detectives still couldn’t puzzle out how Sam was gut shot and bled out, but that there was no blood to show for it. It was if the shot had suddenly appeared in Sam’s stomach, but Charlie had been positive there was only one shot fired that night. The police hated the case because nothing added up.
Why Sam had killed his best friend Mark Banner was another mystery. The police knew Sam had pulled the trigger, but there was absolutely no motive for it. That part of the puzzle mystified them as well. And when they added in the fact that Mark and Sam were making enormous amounts of money from gambling, nothing made sense.
“Some say he was terrible for killing Mr. Banner. If Sam did it, then it was for a good reason.”
Charlie nodded and said, “I believe that with all my heart. And I believe that Mark Banner was a vicious, horrible man, and that’s why Sam had to destroy him. His best friend was a monster. I think that anyway.”
“I’m glad we talked. I feel that, too. You are gracious.”
“I think it’s something new for me,” Charlie said, “I learned it on a strange journey, I think. Why don’t you go join the rest? Get something to eat and drink. Grab one of my friends, and she will give you a little support, okay.”
Ginger thanked Charlie again and walked away towards the other mourners. She went towards Holly, who was with Stephanie Banner; no one understood how Charlie and Stephanie had no animosity, and this was a source of a lot of gossip that both ignored.
Charlie felt watched and turned to see a man approaching. Unlike everyone else at her house, all of them dressed in conservative suits, this man wore faded Wrangler jeans, a tee shirt, and hiking boots. For some reason, Charlie stared at the boots and had the strangest images flitter across her mind’s eye. She imagined Taryn screaming, and this man standing in the pouring rain.
Shaking off the images, she looked at him and thought, he should shave his red beard. His hair was red, he was bronzed, and he had beautiful, soulful eyes.
“Hello, I’m Charlie Andrews.”
“Kelly Brodie.”
“Can I help you?”
“I am doing some work for Stephanie Banner. I’m just making sure she’s okay.”
“She’s fine. She’s over there; go talk to her if you wish, and get a drink….”<
br />
“No, thank you.” He stepped away. “I was just leaving.”
Charlie smiled sadly and watched him walk away. Kelly Brodie. Standing under the tree, Charlie cried. She cried for Sam’s foolishness and for his sacrifice that saved her life, but mostly she cried because to her dismay, her last wish, to bring back her memories, had come true.
She remembered everything.
Part 3
Chapter 3
After everyone left and Charlie was left with only her housekeeper and Dana, she relaxed. She lay in a comfortable chair with Frannie purring in her lap; she stroked the soft fur. Everything was reset, and she had Frannie; Bear was alive and back at his house, eating Kibble and not lying in a forest to rot.
Taryn, Holly, Leila, Carla, Anthea, and Dana would be fine. Bev would pay her bills and never have to betray Charlie; however, Charlie would never again be close to Bev and would draw farther away because there was a side to Bev that was selfish and mean.
Charlie had called Kelly Brodie’s office and spoken to Todd who was alive and well. John would be okay, and two teachers somewhere in the world were going to be able to keep teaching and hike in safety.
And somewhere in the world were cruel killers that Mark Banner had employed. Although they wouldn’t come after Charlie again, no doubt they would stalk and hurt someone, and that bothered Charlie a lot.
When the bell rang, Charlie yelled that she had it, setting Frannie in the chair and giving Dana and Lola waves; they were cleaning up in the kitchen. It was probably another delivery of a billion flowers or plants that she didn’t have room for and didn’t need.
Opening the door, she looked at Kelly Brodie.
He had shaved his beard, and his sea-green eyes met her eyes and searched. She could feel his gaze like a spider crawling into her brain, and it was all she could do to remain aloof and not to hold the man she loved. “Mr. Brodie.”
His face betrayed disappointment.
One more prayer, and she said, “Kelly?”
He grabbed her hand tightly, with desperation on his face. “Do you…do you remember?”
She took a step closer. What was he asking? Her head spun. She almost lost her breath when he pulled her close and held her, whispering into her hair, “I remember.”
Part 3
Chapter 4
The river was flooded badly, and no one was going into the water, except a hiker named Bill, who was a teacher on a break, getting back to nature, saw something bobbing in the water. Carefully, he waded out into the shallow water, and using a stick, he pulled a bottle over so he could reach it.
He was like a child, excited to see there was paper in the bottle; it was a message in a bottle, and no matter what it said, it was very cool to find this. He popped the cork and got the rolled paper out. Unfortunately, water had leaked into the bottle, and the ink had run badly. Bill cursed. All he would read was:
I am attempti
can’t change moment.
If Bill had been able to read it all, he would have found it a puzzle and would have wondered if it were a joke or if someone crazy had written it. As it was, he crumpled the paper and tossed it back into the water and set the bottle and cork on a rock.
The paper swirled and bobbed down the river, leaving Bill to ponder the meaning, but some messages are lost forever, and as the paper raced away, the patterns of time went on. Rules were made to be broken, and nothing is ever set in stone.
Many miles away, Charlie and a Red Man lay in a big chair together, and a black cat named Frannie purred happily.
{Fort Worth 2013}