“I love you, Rebecca Beachy,” he whispered in her ear.
“And I you.”
He kissed her once more and she settled against his side, more content than she’d been for ten years. God had been good to her.
Chapter Fifteen
The first week Rebecca was home, a constant stream of visitors kept her busy. She made a game of trying to guess who her visitors were before they spoke. Emma she guessed because she was with Adam. Sarah, she didn’t know until she heard her voice. Faith she guessed because she walked with a slight limp.
Rebecca wrote the first of several lengthy letters to Grace and was delighted when a reply arrived a few days later. She left the letter lying on the kitchen table when her parents and her grandfather were visiting. It disappeared a short time later and she knew her mother had taken it to read.
Perhaps in time, God would show them a way to heal the breach in the family. Until then, she was happy to serve as a bridge between Grace and the rest of the family.
What Rebecca missed was seeing Gideon every day, but she understood that he had work to do, both for Adam and at his new home. As Christmas drew closer, she grew used to her restored vision. The only time she found she had to keep her eyes closed was when she tried to quilt. Her fingers knew what to do. Her eyes only served to mess her up.
When Sunday finally arrived, Rebecca traveled to Adrian Lapp’s farm with a happy heart. She had so much to be thankful for. She looked forward to lifting her voice in song praising God’s mercy and love.
As her aunt drove the buggy down the highway, Rebecca paid careful attention to the route. Soon, she would try driving again. Gideon’s new home was on the farm adjacent to the Lapps’ property. When his house came into view, she craned her neck to see it. It was small by Amish standards but it had a pretty front porch. The barn was in need of some repairs. He had spoken about love but not about marriage; still she found it exciting to imagine living there with Gideon if they were wed one day.
What was the inside of the house like? She owned a few pieces of furniture. Was there room for her special things, or had Gideon brought a houseful of furniture with him? What she wouldn’t give to turn down the lane this minute and see his home. She didn’t bother suggesting it for Vera was in a hurry. She would have to wait until Christmas for Gideon to show her around the place.
The minute they reached the Lapp farm, Gideon sought them out and Rebecca’s heart skipped with happiness at the sight of his face. He offered to unhitch their horse and to help carry their baskets of food to the house. Vera smiled at him and walked off to speak with her friends leaving the two of them alone for a few minutes. Bless Aunt Vera for her understanding of young hearts.
“I’ve missed you,” he said as he set to work on the harness.
A sweet thrill raced through her. “I’ve missed you, too.”
“Are things getting back to normal?”
Pulling her coat tight against the cold, she raised her face to the heavens. “I can see the sky, Gideon. I see the birds in the air. I see the snow-blanketed fields waiting for the warm sun of spring to awaken them. My life will never be normal. It can only be miraculous.”
He smiled at her. “I’m happy for you.”
She giggled. “I’m happy for me, too.”
He sobered and said, “There are some things we need to discuss, Rebecca.”
“What things?”
“There are things about my past you need to hear.”
Another buggy drove in and stopped beside them. As the family climbed out, Rebecca heard Katie Sutter calling her name. She waved and turned back to Gideon. “What did you wish to tell me?”
“It can wait. Go and visit with your friends.”
She lingered knowing Katie would wait. “Tomorrow is Christmas Eve. Is your family coming?”
“Not until Christmas Day, thank goodness. My house is a wreck. I’ve got to get some cleaning done before my mother arrives. Do you know of a girl who might want to earn some extra wages?”
This was her chance to do Gideon a favor after all he had done for her. “I know just the person.”
“Really? Do you think she could come tomorrow?”
“I’m sure of it.”
“Great. I’ve got a job tomorrow morning in Sugarcreek, but I should be home by ten o’clock.”
“Write out a list of things you want done and leave it on the table. You can settle up her wages when you get back.”
“That’s one less thing I have to worry about.”
“I’m glad I could help.” She patted the horse as he led the mare away. Joining Katie who was waiting for her, Rebecca went into the house to get ready for worship.
Early the next morning, she took her aunt’s horse and buggy and drove for the first time since recovering her sight. It was scary, but when Gideon’s house came into view, her spirits soared.
True to her suggestion, he’d made a list of things to be cleaned. Rolling up her sleeves, she set to work in the kitchen and thought about the meals she might one day make here. The morning passed quickly as she cleaned and dusted the furniture in the living room, aired out the sheets in the guest rooms and put a shine on the linoleum floor of the bathroom. It was past ten before she was done with Gideon’s list and the extra things she found on her own.
After taking a short break to have a cup of coffee, she couldn’t resist a peek into the one room Gideon didn’t have on his cleaning list. His bedroom.
She eased open the door and smiled. Gideon wasn’t a slob. The room and its contents were neat enough. His clothes hung from pegs on the wall. A straw hat for summer sat on top of the bureau along with a comb and brush. The plank floor was bare except for a rag rug at the side of the bed. A beautiful star-patterned quilt covered the bed itself in shades of gold, greens and muted reds.
She blushed at the thought of lying beneath the quilt in Gideon’s arms. If their love was real and they took the next step in their relationship, this was where she would spend her wedding night, where her children, if they were so blessed, would be born. She ran her hand over the workmanship of the quilt and admired the fine stitching.
As her fingers traced the pattern of the squares and triangles they seemed familiar. She closed her eyes. Her heart started pounding. It wasn’t possible. How could Gideon own one of her quilts?
She kept her eyes closed and with trembling fingers, she searched for the corner block, the last block sewn. Relief made her knees weak when she found nothing in the first corner. There was no earthly reason for this quilt to be the one she had given to Booker, yet it felt so familiar. She had worked for weeks on one just like this.
She moved to the foot of the bed and untucked the second corner and then the third. Still nothing.
It was just a quilt. Most likely his mother had made it for him. At the top of the bed, she folded back the last corner. When she did, her fingers brushed crossed the tiny rows of dots. Dots of Braille that spelled her name and the date she had finished her work. November 2.
How was this possible? Booker had said he would treasure it forever. Could he have sold it or given it to Gideon? Did they know each other?
Another possibility took the strength from her legs. Rebecca sank onto the bed. From the moment she met Booker there had been something familiar about him. It was as if she had known him forever. Booker was a pilot as Gideon had been. Gideon returned home only weeks after she said goodbye to Booker.
If only we’d met in another time and another place.
She recalled Booker’s whisper and the touch of his fingers on her cheek.
Please, God, I don’t want to believe that he lied to me, that he played some kind of game at my expense.
From outside, she heard Gideon calling hello. She couldn’t answer. She remained on the bed, hands folded, praying there was a logical explanation.
The door opened and Gideon poked his head in. “I saw your buggy outside. What are you doing here? The house looks great, by the way. Where is your clea
ning girl?”
“I’m the cleaning girl. I’ve been admiring your quilt, Gideon. The craftsmanship is very good. Where did you get it?”
He didn’t say anything, but she saw the change come over his face and she knew. Her heart sank. “All this time, I thought I’d given it to a friend.”
“You did.” He crossed the room and sank to his knees beside her.
She shook her head. “How you must have laughed at the blind woman stumbling around. It must have seemed so funny that I didn’t recognize the man I once planned to marry. Did you really have a cold or was that an act? You did a great job. I never suspected it was you.”
“I wasn’t laughing at you, Rebecca. I was getting to know a remarkable woman who was forbidden to me. Please, let me explain.”
“You’ve had weeks to explain yourself. You deceived me. You lied.” She stood and tried to walk past him but he grabbed her arm.
“I didn’t tell you I was Booker because he no longer exists. I gave up that life. I knew I could never have you unless I did.”
“And the money for my surgery, that came from you, too?” A headache began pandering behind her eyes.
“Yes.”
“I should be grateful for that. I am grateful, but I can’t love a man who has deceived me to such a degree.”
“I was under the ban when I bid on your quilt. I was afraid you wouldn’t use the money if you knew it was from me. I didn’t tell you about the money because I didn’t want your gratitude. I wanted you to love me, to love Gideon Troyer, an Amish handyman, not Booker, the man who gave you back your sight.”
She stared at his hand until he let go of her arm. “I did love Gideon Troyer, Amish handyman. Sadly, he isn’t what he claims to be.”
Gideon raked his fingers through his hair. “That’s not true. This is who I am now. I promise you, this is the truth. I believe God brought me to my senses and brought me home so that I could devote my life to loving you. I know I was wrong to keep it a secret. I should have had the courage to tell you the truth, but I was afraid. Forgive me, Rebecca. I’ll do anything to make this up to you.”
“You are forgiven, Gideon. But I never want to see you again.”
She fled from the room and rushed down the steps of his home toward the buggy waiting in the yard. She heard him calling her name, heard his footsteps pounding after her. Tears blurred her vision and streamed down her face. She never saw the rock she stumbled over. She fell, striking her head with sickening pain against the buggy wheel.
“Rebecca? Rebecca, darling, are you all right?”
She felt his hands on her shoulders as he gently lifted her. Pain sent flashes of light lancing through her skull.
“You’re bleeding. Hold still.”
She raised a hand to her forehead and felt it come away sticky. The smell of blood filled her nostrils. She opened her eyes and a scream ripped from her throat.
Gideon pulled a kerchief from his pocket and pressed it against the gash on Rebecca’s head. “It’s all right. You’re going to be all right.”
“No, no, no.” She began sobbing uncontrollably.
Sitting in the snow beside her, he tried to soothe her. “Head wounds bleed a lot, but it’s not as bad as you think.”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she muttered as she grabbed the front of his coat.
“It’s all right. Do you think you can stand?”
He helped her to her feet but she kept her death grip on his jacket. Her eyes were wide with shock. Tears flowed down her face unchecked.
He gathered her close. This was his fault. He should have found the courage to confess his deception weeks ago. He never should have asked for her love until everything was out in the open.
He disengaged her fingers and put his kerchief in her hand. “Keep this pressed against the cut. I think the bleeding has slowed.”
She took his kerchief with trembling fingers and pressed it to her forehead. All the color was gone from her face. He wasn’t sure she could stand unaided. Her prayer kapp had come off. He bent down to pick it up and held out her. “Here is your kapp.”
She stretched out her free hand—six inches to the side of his. Her eyes were unfocused and staring.
Icy fear poured through his body. “Rebecca, what’s wrong?”
“I can’t see, Gideon. I’m blind.”
No, please God, not after all she had endured.
He scooped her up and placed her in the buggy. “I’m taking you to the doctor.”
She trembled on the bench. “It won’t matter.”
Gideon raced around the other side and climbed in. He gathered the reins and wrapped one arm around Rebecca. He slapped the reins against the horse’s rump, setting the animal in motion. Once they reached the highway, he urged the animal to a faster pace.
It was reckless driving at such a speed with only one hand holding the lines, but he didn’t dare let go of Rebecca as she slumped against him. She was so pale. There didn’t seem to be any strength in her body.
Please God, why are You doing this? Don’t leave her blind. She doesn’t deserve this. Take my sight instead, I beg You.
The trip into Hope Springs seemed to take forever. Finally, they hit Main Street. Heads turned as people stared at his breakneck speed through town.
One more corner. If he didn’t overturn them here the medical clinic was on the next block. His wheels skidded on the snow-covered street as Vera’s mare made the turn. The buggy stayed upright. Gideon hauled her to a sliding stop when they reached the front of the building.
“We’re here, Rebecca. Dr. White is going to fix you up. Don’t worry about a thing.” He was babbling, but he didn’t care. He helped her out of the buggy and gently led her to the clinic door.
Please, God, let her be okay.
Inside, he gave a hurried explanation to the receptionist. Moments later, Amber and Dr. White came out and took Rebecca with them to the exam room. Gideon sank down on the waiting-room chair and stared at his hands. They were stained with blood. Folding them tightly together, he began to pray.
Twenty minutes later, Dr. White came to the doorway and motioned for Gideon to come with him. Gideon followed the doctor to his office. Impatiently, he asked, “How is she?”
Dr. White opened his door. “Please sit down.”
When Gideon entered, he saw Rebecca already seated in a chair in front of the doctor’s desk. Gideon took the empty seat beside her.
He wanted to take her hand, reassure himself that she was okay, but he could tell from the frozen look on her face that she wouldn’t welcome the gesture. The doctor took a seat behind the desk and faced them.
Gideon braced himself to hear what he feared most.
The doctor steepled his fingers together. “The blow to Rebecca’s head doesn’t seem to be serious. I can’t find a physical reason for her blindness. I see no signs of hemorrhage in her eyes, no evidence of detached retina. Frankly, I’m stumped.”
Rebecca said, “I have a bad migraine right now.”
The weight of worry made it hard for Gideon to draw a breath. “Is this permanent?”
Dr. White met Gideon’s gaze. “I can’t say for sure. In light of her recent surgery, I put a call in to Dr. Eriksson. She’s concerned there may be a complication from the surgery that is unrelated to this bump on the head. She feels it’s imperative that she see Rebecca as soon as possible.”
Puzzled, Gideon said, “I thought she was leaving the country?”
“She is. Tomorrow morning. She wants to see Rebecca today. She suggested she be flown via an air ambulance to New York this afternoon.”
Gideon glanced from Rebecca’s stoic face to Dr. White’s concerned one. “Why do I hear a ‘but’ coming?”
“Rebecca’s condition doesn’t meet the urgent care criteria for an air ambulance.”
Gideon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You’ve got to be kidding! She struck her head and went blind. That’s not urgent?”
“We’re not sending
her to a hospital for intensive care. We’re sending her to an eye surgeon for an examination. It’s a big difference to the air transport companies.”
Gideon nodded. “What are our other options?”
“We can contact a private air ambulance company, but it will be very costly, and they may not be available on such short notice.”
“Can we get a commercial flight from Akron or Cleveland?” Gideon wasn’t going to sit still and do nothing.
“I may have a better option. I’ve contacted a friend of mine who owns a small plane. He’s in L.A. on business, but his wife has agreed to let us use the plane. I understand you’re a pilot, Mr. Troyer. Can you fly a Piper Cub?”
Finally, a solution. “Yes.”
“No,” Rebecca said just as quickly.
Gideon glanced at her face and felt his blood turning to sludge that barely moved through his veins. “You don’t mean that.”
“You told me that Booker is gone. You promised me. You are an Amish handyman, Gideon Troyer. You cannot fly a plane. I cannot ride in a plane. It is against the Ordnung of our church.”
Dr. White said gently, “Rebecca, you can fly if Bishop Zook gives you permission. It will only take a few minutes for Amber to fetch him from his farm.”
“But he cannot give Gideon permission to pilot the plane.”
The doctor said, “This may be a case where it is better to ask forgiveness than permission.”
Gideon swallowed hard. He had the knowledge and the power that might save Rebecca’s sight. If he used that knowledge and went against the teachings of their church, he would lose her love.
He slipped from his chair to kneel beside her and took her hand between his own. “I love you with all my heart, Rebecca. If it is God’s will that you never see again, it changes nothing. But, I beg you, don’t make me stand by helplessly when I can save you.”
She stared straight ahead as a single tear rolled down her cheek. “A vow cannot be discarded because it is inconvenient, my love.”
Patricia Davids Christmas Brides of Amish Country: An Amish ChristmasThe Christmas QuiltA Hope Springs Christmas Page 35