by Faith Starr
“Demanding man, aren’t you?”
“I’ve been called worse.”
“I’m sure you have.” She giggled.
“There’s my girl. I knew she was hiding in there somewhere underneath all those tears.”
It was good to see her appetite return. She tore into the bread as if she hadn’t eaten in days, which she probably hadn’t.
“I was supposed to spend Thanksgiving with Casey and her folks next weekend, against my better judgment because her father will be there. Who knows how she’s even going to feel. She has a lot to deal with when she leaves the hospital.”
Before my brain could process the thought, my mouth took it upon itself to respond. “I have a proposition for you. How about you spend Thanksgiving with me and my family instead?”
“What?” Her spoon stopped midair, the broth vibrating with the shaking of her hand. I slid a napkin underneath because I knew it was only a matter of seconds before the soup spilled onto the table. “I’m not imposing on your family on a holiday.” Just as I had expected, the napkin was now full of liquid.
“Holidays are about being with the people you care about. Besides, my aunt and uncle are crazy about you.”
I was so caught up in trying to comfort her I had completely lost myself and invited her to spend the holiday with me and my family. They were going to have a field day with this. I had never brought a woman home for the holidays. Not even Abby. Bringing one to that kind of function meant the R word.
What’s done is done. I sighed. I could deal with my brothers teasing for one night. Jordin needed me, and I had to be there for her. It ate me up inside to see her look so sad.
“That’s sweet of you. Do you mind if I give you an answer in a few days? I want to see how she’s doing before I make a decision.”
“You can tell me the day of, but you’re not spending the holiday alone. Besides, my Aunt Jenny makes the best pumpkin pie.” Just thinking about it had me licking my lips.
“You’re tempting me, Mr. Dorian.”
“Good. Are you ready to take off?” The bread was gone. The bowl was a quarter full. We were good.
“Indeed I am. Let me just change out of pajamas first.”
65
Jordin
The fresh air smelled and felt wonderful blowing against my face during our drive to the beach with the top down. Noah was right. A ride was exactly what I needed to refuel. We listened to music, and he held my hand the entire way there.
He found a spot next to the boardwalk. I watched him walk around the car to open my door for me. He was such a gentleman. And tonight he was so much more. My heart melted from his kindness. He acted so attentive and caring toward me, yet I still wanted more. More than I believed he could give me.
I clicked the release of my seat belt and got out of the car, his warm hand providing more support than he could ever imagine.
Breathe. It was all I could do while standing with my feet pressed into the warm sand beneath me. With my eyes closed, I allowed the fresh salt air to fill me, the crashing of the waves calming the tense muscles in my body.
The shaking of a towel startled me from my semihypnotic state. Noah sat on it, his hand extended out toward me. I took hold of it and sat between his legs, his strong arms immediately wrapping themselves around me. I let my head rest against his shoulder. “This is beautiful.”
“So are you.” He kissed my head, his hands caressing my arms.
As much as I hated to, I crawled out of his arms and sat next to him, my legs crossed in front of me like a pretzel. “Noah, we need to talk.”
He gave me 100 percent of his attention. “I’m listening.”
“When we’re together, you make me feel special.”
Please let the energy in the waves give me courage. I took a deep breath and studied them for a minute, trying to absorb it.
“But when you leave, I don’t know how to feel. The other night you couldn’t leave my apartment fast enough. I can’t continue this battle in my head every time you walk out the door.”
Come on, waves, give it to me. I can take it. My breath picked up speed in anticipation of his answer.
“I don’t know what I’m capable of giving you. You asked me to call more often, so I am. I don’t do the boyfriend thing.”
No. Stop crying. Look at the ocean so he won’t see the tears filling my eyes.
“I’m not asking you to. It’s just that I trust you enough to share myself with you, and I need some kind of reassurance that you’re doing the same with me.”
Whatever you do, do not make eye contact. I couldn’t let him see me weak. He had already seen enough.
“Isn’t that called a relationship?”
“Let’s forget semantics for a minute since you obviously don’t like that word for whatever reason.” Reel in the sarcasm. “Are you with anybody else right now other than me?”
“Do you not want me to be?”
Ugh! Classic avoidance behavior. “You didn’t answer my question.”
“Now who’s being demanding? Fine, I’ve been with one other woman, but she doesn’t mean anything to me. I actually stopped it before anything major happened because I didn’t feel right about it.”
My mouth would probably be filled with sand from dropping so wide open, but I didn’t care. “You were with another woman during the time we’ve been seeing each other?”
Oh my God! Could my heart be shattered any more?
No tears. No more tears, dammit!
The waves seemed to suddenly be crashing against the shore with a bit more force. Maybe they too heard Noah’s horrific confession.
“In my defense, we never had a conversation about being exclusive.”
Was he kidding me? That deserved my evil eye.
“I guess I assumed that since we were together physically, I was enough for you. I guess I was wrong. Can I please ask you something?”
It was now his turn to study the physical movements of the ocean.
“Shoot.’’
I actually felt like it.
“Is this other woman into the lifestyle your club provides?”
My eye contact must’ve been like a solar eclipse, because he couldn’t bring himself to look at me.
“Yes, she is.”
“This is just great.”
Ugh. I quickly remembered what kicking sand does. Ouch! At least he didn’t have to worry about me shooting any more daggers in his direction, because I was now frantically rubbing my eyes to try and get the sand out without causing a corneal abrasion. “I knew it all along. You need that kinky shit. I feel like such a fool. I trusted you, Noah.”
“You’re wrong. I don’t need all that kinky shit. The truth is I used her as an escape to block my feelings about you.”
“Why would you do such a thing?”
Blink. Keep blinking, and fingers crossed the tears will flush the sand out.
Why didn’t we bring a bottle of water? It would’ve been so useful right now.
“Because I don’t like feeling this way.”
“What way? You don’t like caring about someone? That’s pretty messed up.”
Stop kicking sand! Haven’t I caused enough damage?
“I never claimed to be the picture of mental health. I am who I am.”
“So what is it that you want, because I’m not comfortable with you fooling around with other women while we’re together?”
“For the record, all we did was kiss. If you need me to tell you I won’t see other women, I’ll gladly do so. I can assure you that you’ll be the only one from here on out for as long as we’re together.”
“Gee, I’m sorry for the sacrifice.” I rubbed my head. Between this and Casey, it was too much already.
The next thing I knew I was lying flat on the towel with Noah’s strong body on top of mine. “Listen to me, being with you has never been a sacrifice nor will it ever be. So let’s be clear on that point. You’re on my mind constantly. I wonder what you’re d
oing and who you’re with. I want nothing more than to be with you and be here for you like I am tonight. That’s what I’m capable of giving you. I don’t want to use terms to define us. Can you live with that arrangement?” His eyes had sincerity in them.
“I think I can. It just hurts me so much to know you were with someone else, even if it was only a kiss. But I do appreciate your honesty.”
“I’m sorry about that. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you. I’ve been with a lot of women, Jordin, but until now, all they’ve done is fulfill needs. Nothing more.”
There were so many stars in the dimly lit sky. Perhaps that and his endearing comment were a sign things were going to get better.
“Hey, look at me.” He brought my gaze toward his. “You’re doing more than an effective job in the bedroom.”
“I don’t want that to be all we’re about.”
“I wouldn’t have brought you to meet my family if that’s all we’re about. I don’t bring women to my family’s home. I brought you. That should speak for itself.”
So maybe I was slowly peeling away his layers with tonight being yet another one.
66
Noah
Jordin looked a lot better entering her apartment than she did when we left. Her face wasn’t as drawn, and her eyes weren’t as red.
“Can I get you something to drink?”
Her ass did what it did best as she sashayed into the kitchen.
“No. I’m good.” I would be even better with my hands wrapped around it.
She poured herself a glass of cold water and set it down on the counter. There was an odd silence in the air. I wanted to take her in my arms and carry her to the bedroom, but I knew that wasn’t what she needed from me tonight.
“Do you have to leave for work?” She stood in front of me, eyeing me deliberately. She didn’t have to worry. I wasn’t about to run out on her again.
“I’ve worked all day. I’m good. Are you hungry? Do you want me to fix you something to eat?” Her smile always did make my insides feel kind of weird.
“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question? It is my apartment.”
“Remember when I told you to trust me to take care of your needs? I wasn’t only referring to the bedroom.”
“In that case, I am a bit hungry. Why don’t I fix us both something to eat?”
It was kind of like a standoff.
“How about we fix something together?” Compromise, something I did well.
“Deal.”
She booked it to the fridge and browsed through it. And let me tell you, her bending over certainly didn’t help my dick behave properly. The damn thing sprang to life.
“I usually only shop for one so I don’t have much, but I do have the staples. How about cheese and tomato omelets?”
Down, boy.
“Sounds good to me.” To make sure she didn’t notice my erection, I searched through the cabinets for a frying pan. Her laughing at me with her hands on her hips did nothing to help me find one.
She pointed to a cabinet near the oven and brushed past me to wash a tomato in the sink, the smell of her filling me with many things. Things I couldn’t act on tonight.
We moved around each other with swift grace, each doing our own task while not getting in the other’s way. I set the table in the living room and popped the bread in the toaster oven. She took care of the eggs.
Her apartment was small and basic. She was a woman who didn’t come from wealth and found joy in the simplest of things. I found that to be such an endearing trait. I had grown up having everything. I always had to work, but I lacked nothing. This apartment resembled the maid’s quarters in our guest house. Yet for Jordin, it was her security, and she called it home. I appreciated that about her.
“Dinner is served.” She balanced the plates with ease and brought them into the dining room.
“Allow me.” I pulled out a chair for her.
“Thank you, Mr. Dorian. You truly are a gentleman.”
Wow. What a presentation. Slices of oranges twisted with a few grapes on top, a picture-perfect omelet, and slightly toasted bread. She could be a contestant on Top Chef. “This looks delicious.”
“You cooked eggs for me at your apartment, so now we’re even.”
“I’m sure yours will taste much better than mine did. I’m not the best cook.” I was right. It did taste as good as it looked. Yum.
“I loved your eggs.”
That stopped me. How thoughtful of her to say that. I smiled then shoveled another bite into my mouth. “This is fantastic.” She started laughing at me. “What?”
“You’re cute.”
No. She was cute. So far she was great in bed, was a sight to be seen, had the personality to charm the best of them, and was a great cook. I was doomed.
We carried on trivial conversation while we ate. Afterward, we cleaned up and sat in her living room.
“Thank you for tonight, Noah. I appreciate you coming over. I feel a lot better.”
And I loved how she snuggled up against me on the couch.
Damn. That fucking Hello Kitty doll made its presence known again. I tossed it to the end of the couch. The fucking thing kept staring at me.
“I’m glad. That was my intent.”
“You did good.”
My cock envied how her hands played with mine instead of it. It always had been a selfish bastard.
She got more comfortable and lay down, her head resting on my lap. I played with her long, curly hair. Hopefully she wouldn’t feel the hard-on I currently sported. Her face was too damn close to my dick, which made the undertaking somewhat of a challenge, but I was determined to remain in control and give her what she needed, which was my presence. My dick would have to learn some patience.
Her eyes began to close, her body beginning to slightly twitch from sleep a few minutes later. I didn’t want to wake her. I knew she had to be exhausted. I leaned my head against the cushion on the back of the sofa and closed my eyes. Then I too fell fast asleep.
67
Jordin
I woke up feeling something underneath me. I lifted my head to discover I’d been sleeping on Noah’s lap. He was still sound asleep. I reached over to the coffee table to get my phone so I could check the time. Shit! It was seven-thirty. I had an early group scheduled at the clinic.
“Hey you.” He rubbed his eyes and stretched.
“Hey yourself, I do have a bed we could’ve slept in. You must’ve had a terrible night’s sleep.” I sat up next to him.
“To be honest, I feel very well rested, how about you?”
“I slept like a baby. You make a comfortable pillow.” Sadly for me, he made a comfortable everything. “It’s late. I have to get ready for work.” I showed him the time on my phone, feeling bummed.
“Shit. I have to go home and change for work too.” He rose and stretched some more.
“Do you want coffee first?” I was already en route to my bedroom.
“No, thanks, just the bathroom, and then I have to head out.”
“I’ll race you.” My walk turned into a sprint. When he got there, I was already sitting on the toilet. “I won.”
“One point for you, Ms. Turner.” He held up a finger to indicate my score, smiling at me in the mirror before checking himself out.
He could’ve simply asked me for an opinion about his appearance, although it would be biased. I thought he was gorgeous, both him and his reflection.
Interestingly, I had never let a guy watch me clean myself on the toilet before but for some strange reason, I didn’t feel self-conscious in front of Noah.
He took his turn at the toilet while I got the shower started. Shit. His ass was so perfect. I had to take a deep breath. And he put the lid down. This man was a freaking godsend.
“You don’t play fair.”
Oops. Was it that obvious I was staring?
“Why’s that? You knew where the bathroom was.” I played it off, pulling some fre
sh towels from the linen closet. I stripped out of my clothes.
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about you undressing in front of me. I’ve been trying to behave myself, but you’re making it extremely difficult for me to do so.”
“Why do you think you need to behave yourself?” I tossed my T-shirt, a little too close to the toilet. It was good he had closed the lid.
“I didn’t want to cross any lines since you were feeling so down.”
“That’s so considerate of you. I’m feeling pretty up right now.”
Could I feel any more vulnerable? I was completely naked in front of Noah Dorian with the lights on.
“I am too. Can you tell?”
We both glanced at his tented slacks.
“Why don’t you join me in the shower?”
“The way I’m feeling right now, I’m sorry to say I think it’ll be a short one.”
“You’re in luck, then, because I’m a very forgiving person.” I smiled over my shoulder flirtatiously and waltzed toward the shower. I tested the temperature. Mmm, perfect, nice and warm.
“That’s good to know.”
His overwhelming presence stopped me from getting inside it. “Let’s get dirty before we get clean. Shall we?” He moved in front of me and entered first. He took hold of the adjustable handheld piece.
What is he up to?
I joined him in the shower. He kissed me, holding the sprayer above us. It was heavenly, like rain pouring down over us.
With the answer to my question about his intent, I relaxed and melted into his touch, snaking my arms around his neck. That’s when I realized that the shower head was slowly moving downward. Oh shit. I had been wrong. But his actions turned me on. What kind of slut had I become?
He stepped behind me so my back leaned against his upper torso and my head rested against his shoulder. He aimed the water between my slightly parted thighs, the pulsing sensations against my sensitized skin causing my hips to buck forward, the darn things begging for more.