Whispers of Forever: Mending Christmas (Canyon Junction: Hearts In Love #1)

by Mary J. McCoy-Dressel

  “Uh, this song?” he mumbled. “Hmm.”

  It didn’t matter to her. The pleasant memory of the beginning of that night came back every time she heard it. “I remember it enough for both of us.”

  “I’m sure your husband must’ve liked that.” Jake pulled onto his road, and the outside lights in the distance beamed over the layout of his home. He drove to the side before going up to the house, switched the truck lights off, slid the seat back as far as it would go, then took her arm and yanked. “The words in that song describes how I felt when you strutted into detention.”

  She sat the cheesecake on the floor then raised the console, straddling him, her rear end pressed up against the steering wheel. “You remembered.” Almighty hell! What had gotten into her? She attempted to remove herself from his lap. Omigod!

  “Yeah, but I didn’t expect this. You’re a bold one.” Jake held her tight without letting her go.

  “Why are you surprised? Let me move.”

  “I’m not surprised. Not with a familiar naughty gleam in your eyes. Don’t blow the horn with your ass like you did that night.”

  Cupping his hand around the back of her head, he pulled her face down to kiss him, recklessly, a wild kiss without end, but it did end, leaving her lips scorched. She tugged away and backed up against the door on the passenger side.

  “Yes, I remember.” Turning toward her, Jake took her hand, whispering with his lips against her fingers. “Our first time could be here, now. Right here behind the wheel. Nobody’s around, sweetheart.”

  “No, Jake.” She leaned forward to kiss him, tilted her head and smiled, but he drew her closer, kissing her again and blocking out the years past. He no longer kissed like he was seventeen, eighteen or nineteen. Neither did she, and she opened her mouth to accept his sexy, wet kisses moving like hot honey over her lips.

  It was too late, for she was already lost in the kiss, in him, where she almost wished she hadn’t said no to their first time being right here. But it was too soon. Too soon to be taken away on a blissful ride with Jake Lawton.

  He leaned away and unbuttoned the top button on her shirt. Reality sank in. “Uh uh. The cheesecake is getting warm.” Jake removed his fingers from the next button. Blowing out a breath, he closed his eyes and gripped the steering wheel. “Let’s go so we can get this cheesecake chilling and the steaks to grilling.”

  Beth sat forward, careful not to step on the dish, but left her button opened. Cheesecake wasn’t the only thing needing chilling, and steaks weren’t the only thing that needed grilling. Her center burned hot for him. That bulge in his jeans pressing against her while sitting on his lap said it all. If she hadn’t known herself better, she would’ve sworn her cheeks burned, but blushing had never been in her nature. She was ready to experience him. It’d be beautiful between them. She peered at him as they drove up the road. My God. What a rush. “Jake? I never stopped loving you. I went on because I had to.”

  “It’s written all over your face. Probably mine, too. I suppose that’s why I wanted to, well, you know.”

  “I sense it in your kiss.” She lowered her hand to his when he took the truck out of gear. “We’re both unable to deny this. Love is written on your face.” Which made being with him twice as hard.

  “There’s no one to stop us now from the impossible. We’re both adults to live our life as we please. Only we can decide the next step.” Jake chuckled. “We have the first step out of the way now. What we felt from years back isn’t gone.” He gave a smirk. “Weird how it all came back.”

  Beth nodded, and Jake brought her hand to his mouth, which excited her when his lips closed over the knuckle of one finger. The heat of his lips sizzled against her flesh and traveled down her body like a streak of lightning had zapped her.

  “All right, darlin’. Ready to do this dinner thing?” Jake strummed his thumb over her hand and smiled. “It’s best I don’t keep touching you.”

  She peered at his fiery eyes in the twilight. Allowing herself to admit it now, she had missed this guy so much. Outside, she’d have to check her feet. Her socks had been knocked off by that lopsided grin she’d never forget. “I’m ready for dinner and dessert. Cheesecake.” A fan blowing against her hot skin would’ve been nice. Or an ice cube melting over her body.

  Chapter 6

  A gruff bark met them from behind the door. “Will your dog bite me?”

  “Nah, Kasha’s bark might scare you, though. It’s deep for her size. I’ll get you a treat to give her, and she’ll be your friend forever.”

  Once they got inside, Jake knelt, holding the dog’s head with both hands, staring into her eyes. “Meet Beth, Kasha. Be nice, girl.” He stood and handed Beth a treat. Kasha’s tail wagged as she chomped.

  Jake pulled a bottle of Italian dressing from the fridge, called the dog away from sniffing Beth, and rolled his eyes. The two of them were already in love—the way Beth hugged her neck. Kasha moseyed to a spot over by the table. “How about opening the package for me, so I can get the meat marinating.”

  Beth washed her hands after he did. “Where can I find a dish?”

  He pointed it out. “In the oven. I’m good as long as I remove the pans from the oven before turning it on.”

  “Once I forgot to take a frosted birthday cake from the oven before turning it on. It took about five minutes before I smelled it. You know, melted frosting over a cake is delicious!” She laughed and gave him a sideways glance.

  Her laugh made him smile inside. Jake watched her movements as she continued. Wouldn’t kissing warm frosting off her lips taste delicious? After their kiss in the driveway, he wanted more as he knew he would.

  Beth busied herself at the island as she moved newspapers out of the way. “How long had Paige been gone from here? I hope I’m not sounding too nosy, or bringing up something you don’t want to talk about.”

  Jake went to the other side of the island and leaned his elbows on the counter across from her. “Almost four months. As soon as she got the promotion and found out I wouldn’t move to Baltimore with her, she left the ranch.” He lowered his eyes to stare at the pattern in the granite. “She’d been gone way before she physically left. I’m sure it was her plan all along. Then she got pregnant. Paige knew I’d never leave.”

  Beth nearly dropped the glass dish when she gasped. “Pregnant? Omigod, Jake. You lost a baby in the crash too?” Her mouth remained open, her hands still.

  He raised his palm toward her. “No, no, not mine. It wasn’t my baby.”

  She expelled a breath and took a butcher knife from the knife rack to open the package, holding it against the top without moving forward. A sympathetic frown met his gaze. “Damn. Wow! Some story. You got screwed.”

  He took the knife from her hand and laid it to the side, then huffed, “Yeah, somebody did, eh? If I had agreed to leave with her, we would’ve been gone. The day you and I met at the restaurant was the day she told me about being pregnant with that guy’s kid.”

  Beth halted opening the package and stared blankly at him. “Wow. Wow.”

  Jake turned to the freezer to get a bag of broccoli. Yeah. Screwed. “It would’ve been impossible for her baby to be mine.”

  When she opened the package of meat, she grinned. “In case you never learned the difference between steak and chicken, this is chicken breasts.”

  “Hey, you’re observant as well as attractive. Hope you don’t mind I made a switch.”

  “Not at all. I must say I’m pretty good at cooking chicken breasts.”

  “Be my guest because I’m not, but I was about to give it my all.” At least his kid didn’t complain about his cooking. Trace could even handle a few things like scrambled eggs, bacon, and French toast or pancakes.

  “Do you have a cooking bag for the marinade?”

  Jake tilted his head and blinked a couple times. She’s cooking it in a bag? “Huh?”

  “You know, a cooking bag. It’s not so messy. Don’t you know how to cook?”
<
br />   “Kind of good enough to survive, but not with no cooking bag. Do you mean a Ziploc bag? Check the drawers.” He pointed to the bottom of the island.

  Beth peered at him with a lifted brow. “Yes. You mess with my brain, cowboy. She pulled drawers open, finally finding the plastic wrap, foil, Ziploc, and sandwich bags. “You’ve done wonders with this house. It’s so different. New oak cupboards, granite slab countertops, and this island.”

  Jake moved up behind and wrapped his arms around her waist. “I can’t believe you’re standing here in my kitchen.” He pushed her hair aside, kissing the back of her neck as his hands moved up from her waist.

  Her body stiffened when he settled his hands beneath her breasts, enough to feel their weight fall over his fingers. He needed to back off.

  Instead of backing off, he moved close enough beside her that their bodies touched. He placed his finger against her chin and turned her head toward him. “I’ve missed you since the day you left. Having you here makes me think things I shouldn’t.” Jake brushed his knuckles over her cheek and leaned forward to kiss her again. “Stay with me tonight.” So freaking much for backing off.

  “Please,” she said, taking hold of his wrist. “Don’t ask.” Beth whispered, “It isn’t the right time. We can’t pick up like this space between us never happened. Don’t get me wrong.”

  Jake gulped and moved away. “All right. Forgive my forceful ways. It’s a habit I can’t break. Being in control of things, I mean.”

  “Well, I can forgive your forceful ways.” She added the chicken breasts to a Ziploc bag. “Pour Italian dressing in here. Do you have wine?”

  “Somewhere around here. Don’t put wine in there.” Leaving the kitchen through the opened archway toward the dining room in search of a bottle of wine, he damned himself for asking her such a stupid question so soon. He never should’ve assumed she’d want to jump into bed with him. Idiot! What the hell had come over him? He knocked his fist against his forehead.

  “I meant wine for drinking, Jake.”

  He returned with a bottle of Cru Beaujolais. “I remodeled this house about seven years ago. It needed it, but it was bad timing with a toddler running around.” Jake opened the bottle and poured them both a glass. “This was given to me as a gift from Dane’s girl, a sommelier.”

  Beth took a sip. “Mmm, delizioso. Salute!”

  With a tap against her glass, he grinned. “There’s the Italian girl I used to know.”

  After they both enjoyed a drink, she cocked her head in question. “An Italian? Red hair? Green eyes?”

  Jake couldn’t resist a kiss on her wine-soaked lips. “I know you were adopted, but you’re Italian even if not by blood.”

  “My mom will be proud you think so. She tried all my life to make me into an Italian. At least I picked up the cooking and some of the language.” Beth paused. “You know, I did find out about my biological parents. They had been killed in a boating accident. Seems I was born in California.” She put her glass down and held the bag open. “Do you mind?”

  Wow, how tragic. “I’m sorry to hear they’re dead, Beth.” Something got into him tonight that he had a hard time controlling—controlling his sexual reactions to her. Albeit, it wasn’t only about picking up where they had left off. A deeper longing for what had slipped away in the past, wore on him tonight. He covered the chicken with the dressing, willing himself to straighten up, or do whatever the hell he had to do.

  Beth closed it up and set it in the dish. “I can see why you didn’t want to move away with Paige, what with your ranch and business. Is it all right to put this in the fridge?” She already headed toward the refrigerator.

  Jake held the door open. “You know I didn’t want to stay in this town after high school, but sometimes things don’t work out. For two years after we split, I followed a rodeo circuit saddle bronc riding, maybe hoping to kill my damn self—”

  “Dang! How’d you learn to bronc ride, cowboy? Ooh, I’d love to see you in chaps.”

  “I wear chaps all the time around here when I’m working with horses. Bronc riding started here on the ranch when I was a teenager, before I even met you. I went to riding school to learn saddle bronc riding.” Jake wiggled his eyebrows. “If you want to do something bad enough, you’ll do it. I was good at it. Earned some money. Won buckles. I made a name for myself, Beth.” Along with a reputation he may never live down.

  “Good for you. Cheers!” They tapped glasses together again.

  “After I…” He hesitated and glanced away, unsure of how much he wanted to blab, but he was known for being outspoken. “After I found out Paige was pregnant with Trace, I got myself together. I considered starting some kind of business—a job where I didn’t have to work my ass off.” He slapped his thigh and snorted. “Turns out, I work my ass off on the business and ranching. Not as much as before, though. Ranch hands take over most of it now, and I have a foreman, but it was a tough go for a while.”

  “That’s great. I’m proud of you.” Beth sat at the round, wooden kitchen table to the side of a patio door and observed the room. “Did you knock the wall out between these two rooms? Add this door?”

  She wouldn’t think it was so great when she learned what “getting himself together” meant. Leaning against the counter, he folded his arms. “Yeah, I did knock out walls.”

  “How’d this get started? The business, I mean?”

  “Ranchers had to drive quite a distance to get their supplies, me included after I bought this place, and I only have a little spread, not big ranches like some of them. I had a brainstorm—”

  “You used to have a lot of them,” Beth teased.

  Jake grinned. “I still do. My business does real good.”

  She folded her hands on the table and peered outside at the supply barn in the distance “I’m glad you did this. You fit here. Cowboy boots, too. You make a sexy adult cowboy.”

  Do I? He glanced down at his feet and shrugged. Jake put the bag of broccoli back into the freezer until later. He handed her a denim jacket. “Come on, let’s sit outside under the awning. I still haven’t put Christmas lights up outside for the kid. I need to get a tree up, too, so I can keep some kind of normalcy in his life.” He slid the patio door open. Kasha rushed out ahead of them. They sat in red Adirondack chairs. “I had a hot tub addition added, enclosed in an attached adobe building. Want to get in it?”

  “Right now?”

  “Nah, we’ll wait.” Having her in a hot tub would kill him for sure.

  Beth placed her hand over his arm. “You’re such a good father to your son. I’m proud of you for that, as well.”

  “I don’t have a choice.” Her pride in him made his heart thump faster. He gulped a drink of wine. Without his kid, who knows where he’d be today. A dead drunk in an alley? Busted up from fighting? Broken back or neck from bronc riding? Those memories from his past didn’t sit well with who he had become today. “How about you come over and help us decorate the tree?”

  “All right. It’ll be delightful. I’ll make cookies for the event.”

  Kasha took a minute to squat, then walked around sniffing everything that she’d already sniffed a billion times. She glanced at Jake and wagged her tail, then hightailed it up the steps to lay her snout on Beth’s lap. Beth patted her.

  It was quiet around this place when all the ranch hands left and the supply barn closed to the public. This was the time of night he liked to ride the property, work in his weight room, or workshop, with the sun on the horizon. Jake glanced at Beth. “You can make cookies here. We love cookies. I don’t know why, but it feels right that Trace gets to know you. You fit.” Before long his ears would turn red from embarrassment. He pulled his collar away from his neck a little. “I’m not usually this—”

  “Romantic?”

  “I was going to call it stupid. Something happens to me when I’m around you.” When he was younger it’d been understandable and acceptable, but now fully grown, it still happened. Jake clasp
ed her hand. Like her fitting here, it also felt right to have her warm hand in his. Maybe that sounded wrong after losing his wife such a short time ago, but in reality, he had lost her years ago.

  Beth nudged him. “Um, Jake? The barn?”

  A bout of stupidity had distracted him. “Uh, yeah! Do you want to go there?”

  Beth fingered the gold necklace around her neck as she stared into his eyes, but she directed her gaze to the supply barn. “I’m glad you kept it.”

  Jake’s lips shifted to the left. “Hey, it serves a purpose. Remind me to show you what I’ve done with the loft.”

  Beth laughed joyfully, then spoke with a bit of flirt in her voice, “It sure did serve a purpose in the past. I have seen your hayloft.”

  He squeezed her hand and tried not to think about their playing in the hayloft. “It’s my business barn now, except for the loft. A couple horses are for sale over there. I have one in my other barn that I’m selling, and I’ll move it over to the supply barn soon.”

  “My mom talked about us riding together again.”

  “I have a friend who boards horses if you get one. Do you remember Dane Carlson from the Double Dutch Ranch?”

  Beth didn’t answer right away, instead stared at her feet. “He asked me out once when you and I broke up for a week.”

  He tapped his thumb against her hand picturing her with Dane. “No one ever told me. Good thing. I probably would’ve decked him.”

  Beth set her glass down and sat sideways in the chair to face him. She placed one hand against his chest and splayed her fingers over his pecs. “Not to worry. No one matched up to you. He wasn’t my type.”