Anna had seen that too many times in the last two days.
Obsidian crouched next to his mother, weeping along with his father.
River’s pale skin was already a grayish tone, and her body was covered in bright blood.
“Did we win?” she asked Stalks the Darkness in what was probably supposed to be a private link, but she didn’t have the strength to shield it.
“Yes, my love,” Darkness said as he gathered her in his arms and tried to get her to drink some of his blood, but Anna already knew no amount of gargoyle blood could save her.
“I love you and our children. I should have told you that more often. I couldn’t have asked for a better family. I’m proud to be Lillian and Obsidian’s mother.”
The dryad fell silent then, and Anna thought she’d lost consciousness, but then her voice continued in their thoughts.
“Darkness, I hope you find love again one day. A true love. A female worthy of you as I never was. I’m sorry for my part in keeping you a prisoner for all those years.”
“It is already forgiven. And you are my true mate, and I love you. One day I’ll see you in the Spirit Realm.”
River’s eyes never opened again. A short time later, she exhaled one last time, her chest stilling.
Obsidian cried, rocking himself softly.
Anna went to him then and wrapped her arms and wings around him. “I’m here. I won’t leave you. Sleep now.”
When he stopped rocking, she realized it was because he’d surrendered to the stone sleep.
“Darkness, I have no right to ask this of you, but will you see that your son and I are protected. I fear we can no longer protect ourselves.”
She saw the other male snatch at her request like it was a lifeline. And perhaps it was. Gargoyles were protectors, and now he had something to protect again. “Of course, Kyrsu. Rest peacefully knowing you and my son are safe.”
“Thank you.”
Sighing, Anna cuddled closer to Obsidian and rested her head on his shoulder as she wrapped her tail around him.
“Sleep well, my love,” she whispered before she, too, gave in to the call of the stone sleep.
Chapter 35
Lillian
WAKING WAS MORE DIFFICULT than usual, and Lillian instantly knew something was very, very wrong even before she opened her eyes. There was a hollowness inside her. It was familiar. She’d felt it before. Her soul was gone like the time it had lived in her hamadryad. But this time it was much worse. She couldn’t feel Gregory. Couldn’t sense him.
Gregory?
When she opened her eyes, she discovered she was in a tent. A swift glance around showed she was alone except for a stone statue with Gregory’s likeness. He sat off in the shadows at the other end of the tent.
She stumbled to her feet. Wobbling unsteadily, she made it to his side.
“Gregory?” She called to him again, but he didn’t answer nor did his skin warm under her hand.
“He’s gone,” Thayn said as he appeared in the tent beside her. “I’m sorry. I know the pain of losing a loved one.”
Then he took her in his arms and comforted her, holding her while she sobbed. When she quieted, he told her everything that had happened.
It was hard to speak, but she forced words out. “The Sorceress ensured I would live so I can raise Gregory’s child?”
“Yes. She couldn’t face the thought of losing the child.” He paused and then continued. “But there is a cost for existing without your soul or the magic of the Avatars. You will not live much beyond ten years.”
“Just long enough to see my gargoyle daughter born,” she breathed. “But my child will live?”
“Yes. And I swear upon my soul I will help Vivien raise the girlchild into a woman to make her Avatar parents very proud.”
A sense of devastation overtook her for a few minutes, and yet she understood why the Sorceress ensured that Lillian lived. She wanted to give her daughter a chance at life.
The old gargoyle cleared his throat. “But if you’re up for one more adventure, you might have a chance at the life you and Gregory wanted—that big family with lots of little ones.”
His words breathed new hope into her charred and hollowed out heart. If there was any way to get Gregory back and restore herself to the Sorceress...
Then Thayn laid out his plan with all the risks and the rewards. But if she was successful at reaching the Avatar in the Spirit Realm and could convince it to sever its soul in two once more, she might have the life she and Gregory always wanted.
Darkness joined them then, walking in through the open tent flap with Gran only a few steps behind him.
Vivien ran to her and gave Lillian a fierce hug. “My darling. Thank the Mother Goddess. Thayn said you’d wake. And I knew you would. You’re such a fighter. But knowing something and seeing it with my own eyes isn’t at all the same.”
Gran gave her two more hugs before she stepped back to allow Darkness his turn. It was after her father finally released her that Lillian learned about her mother’s death. That came as a surprising blow, and she wasn’t at all sure how to process that news. She’d only known her mother a short time, and they hadn’t necessarily gotten along as well as they could have, but the news that she would never see her birth mother again brought fresh tears to her eyes.
Then she learned that Jason and Greenborrow were both still missing.
“I know they are alive,” Gran said with passion. “I’d know it if either of them was dead. We just haven’t found them yet is all. They’re probably out chasing escaped enemies.”
Lillian could only hope that was true. And while she wanted to join the hunt for them, she also knew if they’d been captured, the Avatars would be able to find them much swifter than any search party.
She said as much aloud and demanded to know more about what she’d have to do to win back her soul.
“It won’t be an easy task, my daughter,” Darkness cautioned. “The Avatar always prefers to be one and only separates at the Divine Ones’ command. This time there is no danger to the three realms to move the Divine Ones into giving such an order.”
She sucked in a breath. “I understand.”
“The Avatar may not wish to experience the pain of separation again so soon, even if such a thing is possible,” Darkness continued to explain. “And the soul might be too weakened for what you ask even if the Avatar is willing. But if you wish to go, I will carry you to the Spirit Realm since that is within my power to do.”
It was a risk. A great one and the outcome uncertain. But if she didn’t go, she would always regret not trying.
“How soon can we go?”
Chapter 36
Lillian
THE REALM OF SPIRITS was nothing like what Lillian envisioned. She looked out over a long, flat prairie. A silvery magic floated around her like mist. Her father had explained that this was a transition place, not the true afterlife and that the mist could be used to shape anything the heart desired.
He’d taken her as far as his own bodily limits had allowed. Unlike her, his body wasn’t designed to house the soul of an Avatar. As a result, he couldn’t travel as far as her into the Spirit Realm. But before she’d left him to continue on, he’d cautioned her not to shape the mist into anything.
It would be far too easy to conjure up Gregory and live here until her body gave out from lack of food and water. Then she’d die without ever reaching the Avatar. Her father had also told her as host to the soul, she would be able to sense the Avatar and track it.
Though likely the Avatar would sense her long before she found it.
That was what Lillian was hoping for when a white equine shape came galloping out of the mist. At first, she thought her subconscious mind had summoned the unicorn. But then as he pranced his way closer, she doubted she would summon anything so silly acting.
“Hello, my friend,” she called to him.
“Lillian, I came as soon as I heard you had arrived. I knew you were
a brave one.” He lowered his head for a scratch just like he had when he’d been alive.
“Are you okay?” she asked him.
“As good as new. Better actually. Though, I miss my friends back on the mortal world. And I don’t know what that dour pooka will do without me.” He bobbed his head and nuzzled her. “But enough talk of me. Would you like a ride to your Avatar?”
“Please!”
The stallion nickered in humor and then presented his side for her to mount. She didn’t have to be asked twice. Then they were galloping toward her future.
WHEN SHE FINALLY LOOKED upon the Avatar—ethereal silvery-blue power floating from its elegant body like mist rising off the ocean—she was humbled by the being’s beauty and strength. Graceful wings trailed behind the being like a cloak, and from the shimmering mists, a long, powerful tail appeared, its tip flicking in a familiar manner as it swirled the surrounding mist-like power slowly.
Even over the distance, she could feel the immense flows of magic the Avatar commanded burning along her skin. As she watched in absolute silence, barely daring to breathe for fear she would distract the Avatar at a critical moment, the spirit being injected a substantial flow of magic into a section of the Veil Between the Realms.
Strengthening it? Repairing it?
After a time, the Avatar shifted, moving to a new section of the Veil, closer to Lillian’s location. Nearer now, she had a better view and could more easily study the spirit’s beauty. Its surprisingly human—or sidhe-like—face now in profile, she noted the hard line of a jaw contrasting with the softer curve of a cheek. A hint of full lips. A broad brow. The more she studied it, the more androgynous it appeared.
But one thing was certain, its features held an otherworldly beauty that stole her breath.
The sublime being was a strange mix of the Gargoyle Protector and his Sorceress. The two halves of the soul truly were one being. It was one thing to be told but something else entirely to see it. This was the true Avatar of the Divine Ones. One being made whole at last.
What right did she have to ask for such a great sacrifice? To ask for it to split itself in two just so one mortal gargoyle-dryad hybrid could live out a dream that was never meant to be?
A sob built in her throat. She closed her fist in the unicorn’s mane.
“Let’s go. I don’t belong here. I’ve intruded enough.”
“You want to go now? But we only just arrived, and the Avatar will want to see you before you return to the Magic Realm.”
“I can’t face the Avatar. I never should have come. And I certainly have no right to ask it to make such a sacrifice for me.” Tears rolled down her cheeks. “Please go.”
“My Lillian, do not go so soon.”
That beautiful voice sent a chill down her spine. She looked up toward the sound, craving to hear more. And she recognized something of her beloved gargoyle in its rich tones.
The mists swirled around the titan’s legs as the Avatar moved toward her; its strides too graceful to be called anything other than a slow prowl. Lillian took a dozen steps back before she could stop herself. The being didn’t react to her show of fear, merely kneeling gracefully before her.
Had there been sun or shadow in this place, she would have been shrouded in darkness, dwarfed by the titan’s immense size.
Her heart, already pounding in her chest, beat harder as the Avatar reached out and touched her, caressing one finger along her entire right side.
“It has only been a short time, but I have already missed you, my Lillian.”
Strangely, the Avatar sounded more male by the moment. As she watched, she saw a gradual shift in the spirit creature’s appearance and suddenly it didn’t just sound more like a ‘he,’ it looked it as well. One specific male. Her gargoyle.
And then that powerful mind reached out and touched her thoughts with the kindness she’d come to expect of her beloved mate.
“Gregory?”
“Yes. I was known as Gregory. Your mate.” The creature frowned, his mobile ears emerging from his thick mane and flicked hesitantly, as if he was deep in thought. “It is strange to think of myself as male in this place. I am not male or female here and yet somehow your presence has triggered a change in me. I wonder why that is?” He paused again and a gentle smile played across his lips. “Come, my love. Let me hold you.”
She reached for him eagerly, climbing on the titan’s large hand, then uncaring if she appeared foolish or weak or weepy, she clung to one of his fingers.
He held her in that gentle cage of spirit and shimmering power for what might have been hours as she poured out her grief at losing him.
Eventually, she finished sobbing, her tears drying.
“I came here because I wanted you back,” she said at last. “I wanted the Gargoyle Protector and the Mother’s Sorceress to be able to have the family you’ve always wanted. I wanted you to see your daughter born, to teach her and guide her. And then I wanted the same for Gryton if he still lives.”
The Avatar laughed, his grin stunning. “That one is far harder to kill than anyone knows. Our son still lives and will return to us one day.”
“I am glad.” A fresh flood of tears spilled down her face. “Damn it. I can’t stop crying.”
“Do not worry,” he crooned softly. “Tears are never a weakness. But you say you came here because you wanted me back and yet now you sound as if you’ve changed your mind.”
“Because seeing you as you truly are, seeing you complete like this, made me realize how selfish I was to want you to sacrifice so much just to return to me. You have sacrificed enough. You deserve to be happy here where you belong.”
“I remember what it was like to love you. I would return to the living for you even without the promise of children and a family.” He grinned again. “Though, of course, I want a family if you are willing. You are offering me, offering us, the one thing we have always wanted.”
“You want to return with me?” She stood straighter as eagerness and hope pumped through her blood.
“Yes. More than anything. But it is not without great risk. You will have to carry both halves of the Avatar soul back to the Magic Realm. And once there, you will need to convince the male half to release you and return to his own body.”
“Thayn told me as much.”
“Yes, but that is the greatest hardship for the Avatars. And I’m not sure if my male half will be strong enough to do what he must. Lillian, you may need to be strong enough for us both and convince him to give up the most perfect of bonds for another type of bond that is less perfect but has the chance to be even more rewarding. Are you willing to risk this? If you fail, I will remain with you until your life is over.” The Avatar paused as if remembering something. “Hosting both halves of the Avatar soul will bring you a swifter death. Your body isn’t designed to carry both halves of my soul.”
“For a lifetime together, to live in peace and raise our children, I would risk far more.” She paused as something else occurred to her. “What about our daughter. If I die before she is born, will it bring about her death as well?”
“Normally it would, but I can share enough magic with the hamadryad tree to last many, many years. That way, even if we fail, our daughter will live on.”
Grinning as a weight lifted off her chest, she held her arms out wide. “I eagerly accept you into my body.”
The Avatar shimmered, losing form and then he came to her, entering her body with a great gentleness and care, as if he was making love to her.
All that shimmering power flooded into her, sinking into her skin and pumping through her blood where it finally came to rest just below her heart. It was the most glorious feeling, as if he touched her everywhere, filling up every lonely corner of her mind. It was divinely perfect. Then it was over. She was now full, brimming with power and knowledge.
For the first time since waking in the tent, she felt complete.
But the Avatar soon guided her back the way she’d come. Th
ere was a rushed urgency to the journey this time. Fleetingly, the memory of the Avatar’s warning, of how her body couldn’t contain both halves of the soul for long, surfaced and she understood the reason for the rush.
Slowly Lillian’s surroundings faded. She surrendered to the Avatar, trusting the spirit creature to know what to do.
Chapter 37
Lillian
SHE AWOKE WITH THE sense she’d slept a few hours, though her body was still exhausted. The sun was rising, a new day beginning as she opened her eyes and looked around. The walls of a tent again met her gaze.
Both the tent and her lack of magic were familiar. There was something else too. She still lacked a soul.
The Avatar in the Spirit Realm—was it all a dream?
Please, no. Not a dream.
“It was real. This is real,” said a most familiar and beloved voice.
A moment later strong arms encircled her and pulled her out of the cot where she’d been sleeping.
“There was no way we would both fit on that tiny bed, so I took the floor. However, I think I’d prefer to be your bed.” Gregory nuzzled her and then started giving her sloppy gargoyle kisses before settling her on his chest.
“Gregory! You’re here!”
“Yes.” His happy rumble was accompanied by a few more licks. “And you are the bravest, most determined mate in all the realms. I don’t deserve you.”
She snorted. “You’re going to get exactly what you deserve; a very long vacation and then a future filled with many children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Is there anything else you’d like before I accept your surrender?”
“No.” Purring, he ran his hands along her sides. “Do you wish to get started now?”
Grinning, she turned her head and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “As tempting as that is, I think I need a bath first and then maybe a bigger bed. Though I’d like to know one thing.”
The Complete Gargoyle and Sorceress Boxset (Books 1-9) Page 198