by Fields, MJ
I lean against the door frame.
“Patrick Steel, I’m serious.”
“You’ve taken keys to my building without permission; do you really think I’d leave keys lying around again?”
“You’re doing this because you want me here.”
“And why again did you come to Boston?”
She crosses her arms. Definitely braless.
“You said—”
“I was drunk.”
“And I’m done playing games,” I seethe.
“So, sell me the building.”
“Tell me again why you came to Boston.”
She sits down in my chair and spins in a circle. “You told me it was nice.”
“And …?”
“And”—she stops spinning—“I agree. It’s nice. Which is why I was going to buy a shop and settle here.”
“And …?”
“And what do you want me to say? I could never go back to Jersey? I could never face you directly after leaving you like I did? That coming here made me feel close to you? That I wish you knew that you were not the only one whose heart broke that day? That I wish I didn’t have this gene that gives me a greater chance of getting cancer and dying when I’m young so I never can be normal? I can never give you what you want?”
“Fuck what I want. What do you want?”
“All that. I want all that. Are you happy now?”
“Not that you think you can’t have a good life, no. Not that you think I didn’t love you enough to not give a shit if you didn’t have tits, no. If you remember correctly, I was pretty fond of your pussy, too.”
She scowls.
“I want you to make an appointment with your doctor, and I want to go with you.”
“Why?”
“Because, Savvy—”
“Sutton. Savvy’s dead. She died two lifetimes ago.”
“Fine, because, Sutton, it appears to me that you settle nicely into shit unless I’m not holding your fucking hand, so make the appointment.”
“I’m not having babies with you.”
“If the doctor says it’s okay, then you will, and we won’t be waiting. I’ll be pumping my cum into your pussy three times a day.”
It’s not as if I didn’t expect her to walk out after that. I did.
What I didn’t expect was a text immediately after.
3:01 p.m. – How about you do you, and I’ll do me?
3:01 p.m. – Perfect, and when we’re not doing ourselves, then we can do each other.
3:02 p.m. – OMG! When will you stop objectifying women?
3:03 p.m. – We both know how far past objectification this has gone.
And I certainly didn’t expect her to come back through the door.
“Fine, okay, you want to know what hurts the most? Knowing you can do so much better. You could be loved by someone who isn’t all broken. I mean, most of the time, that’s how I feel. But not when you send texts like that and not when you buy the one thing that I was really looking forward to.”
“Shut up, Sutton.” I walk toward her. “Just shut the fuck up.” I grab the back of her head and drop my lips on hers. Then I wrap an arm around her waist, lift her up, and carry her toward my bedroom. Against her lips, I tell her what’s up.
“You’re done running. I don’t care if you have three tits or none. The shit you think is gonna happen to you, because you seriously still don’t see how fucking worth it you are, may not. But if it does, we’ll pick a set out together from the Titties “R” Us catalog. Or, better yet, we’ll mold yours and put them in fucking storage in case we need them. At some point, I’m sure”—I drop her on the bed—“you’ll be pissed at me over something fucking ridiculous and make me go without, so they’ll come in handy. I’ll press them together and fuck ’em to get myself off.”
I pull my shirt off and toss it aside. “We’re gonna fuck. And I’m gonna come inside you. From what I understand”—I pull my leg out of my sweats, and then the other—“the chances of you getting knocked up once a month are about the same as you getting cancer, because you have ‘the gene’. Newsflash: my grandmother doesn’t have the gene and she has cancer.”
“I’m so sorry,” she whispers as I pull her up, tug her shirt off, and get annoyed as fuck that she’s wearing a bra as I unsnap it, and then push her back gently.
When she opens her mouth, I bend over and thrust my tongue inside it to shut her up … and because I want to see if she still tastes so fucking good.
She does.
I pull back, breaking our kiss. “I’m so fucking hard right now that I’m a little nervous that, when I do come inside your pussy, my barbell will end up permanently lodged in your throat, but it will get better as time goes on.”
I yank her pants down. “You want me to stop”—I stroke myself—“say it now.”
She says not a word.
“Perfect. Now, I’m gonna fuck you hard, fuck you fast, and fuck you raw, because, Sutton, I love you.”
“I love you,” she whispers.
“I fucking know that,” I hiss as I run my crown up and down her soaked seam before thrusting inside her fully.
“Whose pussy is this?”
“Yours.”
“Whose heart is this?”
“Yours.”
“Whose lifetime is this?”
“Ours.”
“Fuck yes, it is.”
* * *
We fucked and fought for four days straight. We didn’t leave the apartment for anything. I missed classes, she missed classes—she’s only enrolled in two because she planned to cut her tits off and thought she would wait until she healed to go full-time, at Harvard.
I dropped my classes knowing I was going to be too busy dealing with what I now had in front of me—Grandma Patrick, the apartment building, and school to keep me busy. Now with the ceramic shop and her, I don’t need to keep busy to fill empty space. She’s already consuming it all.
She admitted to following me on social media. I was pissed I didn’t know she had accounts so that I could do the same, so I had a fucking clue where her head was at, so I didn’t think I was alone and crazy because I couldn’t get over her.
Day four was the worst.
She started demanding I tell her everyone I had slept with. When I admitted I really wasn’t sure, she flipped her shit some more, then locked herself in my room for five hours … with my phone.
When she came out, she threw it at me and told me that she messaged them all. She said she wasn’t sorry.
Then she tried to leave.
I didn’t let her.
She broke down and cried.
How fucked up is it that I think she’s even more beautiful when she cries?
Apparently, pretty fucked up, or so she said when she locked me out of the room for another hour. Then she let me back in, apologized profusely, and fell asleep.
When I came out of the room to order some takeout for when she woke up, the phone was pinging notifications left and right.
When I opened the first, I found it funny. She had told a hook-up that my doctor informed me that:
My itchy anus wasn’t caused by my monthly hemorrhoidal flare-up; it was caused by an STI that I may have passed on to you and numerous others. Please get checked out and learn a lesson from our indiscretion.
Regards,
Patrick Steel,
ex manwhore.
It wasn’t funny when a receptionist at my parents’ company messaged me that she was,
“… sorry about the issues you’re having. I think you sent this to me by mistake. Healing prayers and congratulations on your recovery.
*prayer hands*
And I was even more pissed when I scrolled through and found out she had sent that to every female in my DMs.
I really flipped my shit when Truth sent me a text and told me to look at all my tags on IG, Snap, and TikTok.
I drafted a post saying I had been hacked. It wasn’t a lie.
When Sa
vvy/Sutton finally wakes up, she looks dejected as she holds up her phone, my old phone, the one I gave her, the one she still has, and says, “I’m sorry.”
“I’ll forgive you, but you gotta stop thinking you don’t belong with me.”
She nods as I sit back and she climbs on my lap, running her fingers over my chest. “What’s the number seven on your chest?”
“The ink?” I ask, knowing exactly what she’s talking about.
She nods.
“Seventh girl I kissed, owned my heart. Felt fitting.”
She looks up at me through her long as hell lashes. “Me?”
“Only girl I’ve ever said I love you to, only girl I’ll ever love. Only girl I want forever with.”
She smiles. “Me?”
“Only you.”
* * *
The End
Also by MJ Fields
THE STEEL WORLDS
(Recommended reading order)
The Men of Steel Series
Jase
Cyrus
Zandor
Xavier
Forever Family
Raising Steel
The Ties of Steel Series
Abe
Dominic
Eroe
Sabato
The Rockers of Steel Series
Memphis Black
Finn Beckett
River James
Billy Jeffers
The Match Duet
The Unsocial Dater
Match This!
ImPerfectly Matched!
The Steel Country Series
Hammered
Destroyed
Wasted
Tied in Steel series
Valentina
Paige
Gia
Steel Crew
(Generation 2)
Tagged Steel
Branded Steel
Laced Steel
Justified Steel
Tricked Steel
Busted Steel (January 2021)
Smashed Steel (March 2021)
Marked Steel (May 2021)
Maxed Steel (July 2021)
THE LEGACY SERIES FAMILY OF BOOKS
(Recommended reading order)
The Love Series
Blue Love
New Love
Sad Love
True Love
The Wrapped Series
Wrapped In Silk
Wrapped In Armor
Wrapped Always and Forever
The Burning Souls Series
Stained
Forged
Merged
LRAH Legacy Additions
Love You Anyway
Love Notes
The Way We Fell
The Truth About Love Series
27 Truths
27 Lies
The Firsts Series
Her First Kiss
His First Crush
Their First Fall
27 Truths About Their First Goodbye
Their First Time
The Norfolk Series
Irons
Shadows
Titan
Timeless Love series
Unraveled
Deserving Me
Hearts So Big
Couture Love
The Caldwell Brothers Series
(co-written w/ Chelsea Camaron)
Hendrix
Morrison
Jagger
Visibly Broken
Use Me
Standalones
Offensive Rebound
About the Author
MJ Fields is a USA Today bestselling author of contemporary and new adult romance novels. She lives in New York with her daughter and smoochie faced Newfie, Theo.
When she's not locked away in the cave, she enjoys spending time with her family, listening to live music, watching theatre, singing off key, dancing to her own beat, listening to audio books, and reading— of course.
Forever Steel!
Join MJ’s mailing list:
https://mjfieldsbooks.com/newsletter
Thank you
I am so very blessed to have an amazing support system,
Crew!
Thank you to my reader Crew,
MJ Fields ‘Crew’
Your support and ‘Forever Steel’ kind of love means the world to me.
Thank you Autumn for taking care of everything so that I can write and occasionally breathe.
You are amazing, I hope you know that I appreciate everything you so daily.
Thank you Julie and Kris for not telling me to ‘fly a kite’. This go was rough. You kept me grounded, kept me believing I could, and seriously ladies, I have so much love for your passion in what you do.
Big love to you both!
Thank you Julianna for making the beautiful cover.
Thank you to the amazing bloggers who show me love and support, my ARC team that cheers me on and devours all my books and want more, reviewers who take the time to share the love of my words, through their own, and to all my readers—all over the world— who read my work; without you, I would not be able to do what I love the most,
write about the most important thing in the universe…
LOVE.
And to my real world ‘Steel Crew’,
We work, we do good, we laugh, and we love each other just as much as the characters in these books.
I am Forever grateful and blessed to live amongst you, and raise my girl with you,
So much love
And
Forever Steel!
MJ