“Maybe, but it doesn’t matter. I’m with you. It doesn’t matter what happens in my dreams. I love you and my future forever is with you, Eden. This is crazy to be fighting about a damn dream I can’t help.”
“I know it is. Let’s just go to sleep. We have to drive back to New Orleans in a few hours anyway,” he says as he lies back down.
I lie back. “I told Kyle we would stay here a while with them.”
“Well, I hope that was before the jet and the dogs, because if it was after them, then you are both not thinking straight,” he says.
I need to stop talking now. I am really making my husband mad and that is never good.
“I love you, Eden. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Alyssa,” he says, then pauses. “I love you too. Now go to sleep.”
I close my eyes and wonder why I was dreaming like that. I love my husband with all my heart. I love Kyle too, but not like the way I love Eden. I don’t want a day to go by without Eden in it.
What is wrong with me?
CHAPTER 62
KYLE
“You sure can eat now, Ally,” I say, as we leave a café, then walk down a sidewalk downtown.
“Kyle, be nice,” she says as she bats at my arm.
I reach out to touch her ample stomach. “How’s Junior treating you, Al?”
“I really wish you’d quit calling her that,” I say. “Your daughter is treating me like a punching bag. I think she’s going to be a kickboxer.”
I laugh. “Well, thanks for walking over here to go to lunch with me. Are you going back to work now?”
“Where else would I be going, Kyle? Pregnant or not, we have bills to pay and baby things to buy,” she says with a tired voice.
“I know, Ally,” I say. “It’s almost summer break. I can work full-time hours at the bowling alley once school lets out. I might have a gig this weekend and that’ll bring in some extra money.”
She smiles. “We’ll make it, Kyle. I’m not worried. I won’t be off until midnight tonight. When will you be home?”
“Since you have to work, I’ll probably go hang out with the neighbor until you get home. I only have to work until ten tonight. I’ll bring pizza home for you,” I say.
“No! Not pizza, Kyle. It gives me indigestion. I’ll eat at the restaurant when I get a break. If I get a break.”
I stop and give her a stern look. “You better eat, Mrs. Stevens. Promise me.”
A frown covers her face. “I promise, Mr. Stevens. And stop calling me that. I call your mother that. It’s weird.”
I put my arm around her shoulders and say, “You could call her mom if you wanted to. It might soften her up some, to have you act more like a daughter.”
“I don’t think she wants me to act like that at all after her freak-out when you told her we went to Vegas and got married. I have the feeling she thinks you’ve made a bad mistake with me. Then we got pregnant right away and fueled her fire even more.”
“Once she sees that little baby, she’ll come around. We’ll have to get up there more often, once the baby comes,” I say.
“I don’t see how we can afford it any better than we can now. We haven’t been home since we left,” she reminds me.
I give her shoulder a nudge with mine. “You’re grouchy, Ally. You need to sleep more.”
“I wish I could, Kyle. I wish I could. Here we are. I turn right here and you turn left,” she says.
I let her go. “I love you, Ally. See you around midnight,” I say, then kiss the top of her head.
“Bye, Kyle, I love you too,” she says as I walk away.
I turn to look back at her, feeling like she’s sad about something. I see her accidentally bump into someone with her stomach. Then hear her say, “Sorry, I don’t always realize how big I am.”
“No need to apologize. It’s my fault. Have a nice day,” a guy with wavy brown hair on top and short sides says as he almost bows.
I turn and watch him walk down the sidewalk past me. He shoots me a smile and I look back to see my wife checking him out.
* * *
“I can’t believe these people,” I hear Eden say as he stands just outside the bedroom door. His voice woke me up and it becomes apparent I’m dreaming about Ally. That’s not good.
I rub my eyes and blink. My dreams come flooding back to me. I close my eyes as I see Laura has spotted me awake.
“Hey, sleepyhead,” she says with a smile.
“Good morning, babe.”
Eden’s voice comes from the hall again. “Get dressed, Alyssa,” he tells her, then shuts their door.
He sounds mad.
What is going on in my head? Why am I dreaming that Ally and I are married and having a baby?
A baby girl. We would’ve had a baby girl if she was never chosen to be a bird.
I wonder if she saw my dream somehow and Eden saw it through her. That would probably make him pretty mad.
“I’m making scrambled eggs,” Laura says as she gets up. “Come to the kitchen after you get dressed.”
I hurry to clean myself up and get dressed. I want to talk to Ally before I see Eden and maybe reveal more than I should.
As I head down the stairs, I can hear Laura talking in the kitchen. “How could I not like it, Al? It’s beyond perfect. Breakfast is almost done. Kyle’s coming down any minute. I saw Eden go out the door to the garage. You wanna go get him?”
I put the truck keys the foundation gave me in my pocket. I give my pocket a jangle to be sure they’re in there. Rocketing through the living room, I make it out the front door without Laura seeing me.
Ally’s car is gone, which means Eden went somewhere in it. I jog around to the garage and see Ally running her hand along the side of my new truck.
“Hey, Ally, I was just thinking about you. Thank you for giving me the best present anyone could ever give me,” I say, remembering one of the things I said to her in the dream I had about making love to her.
She blinks in rapid succession, then says, “I didn’t buy it, Kyle. I just told them what you might like.”
I take her hand, pulling her towards the driver’s side door of the tall truck. “Come on. I’ll give you a real quick ride,” I say and then take her by the waist, picking her up into the driver’s seat, just like I used to.
She scoots over, just like she used to, as I climb into the driver’s seat. “It’s so nice, Kyle. I haven’t been in it yet.”
She starts to scoot all the way over, but I grab her arm, stopping her from moving further from me. “Look, Ally, it has satellite radio. How cool is that? What am I saying? Your car has that too. I’m not used to all this yet.”
She begins to fiddle with the radio like she always does. “How did you like driving my car here from New Orleans?” she asks.
I look over her shoulder as she finds some crappy hard rock station. “Oh, it’s a damn cool car, Ally. But it ain’t no truck, girl.”
I start the engine and it’s loud. She looks at me with the excitement of a little kid. I back out of the garage, then drive down a dirt road that runs around the privacy fenced yard to the back of the property.
We come out of the tall pine trees to find a pasture with an old barn and a pond. “Check this out, Ally. We can have horses, and cows, and whatever we want.”
Ally looks down. “Eden told me we would be going back to New Orleans this morning. For some odd reason he went to town to get something first, but he told me to get dressed before he left. I guess we’ll be leaving soon after he gets back.”
I wonder why that is? The plane spotting them, maybe.
I pull up in front of the old barn, then jump out, holding my hand out to Ally. I’m careful not to let her body run down mine as I place her on the ground. I lead her to it. It’s a little dark. There are a couple of large stalls and a few doors. I open one of the doors up.
I pull the door open and we see a quilt lying on the old wooden floor. I look around the dark little room and see a candle half
burned and an empty bottle of bourbon. My mind is reeling now. I feel hot at my memory of Ally in my dream and us on that blanket.
“I just remembered I was supposed to get Eden to come in and eat breakfast. Laura’s going to kill us,” Ally says as she turns and heads back to the truck.
She grabs at the door handle to climb back into the truck, but can’t reach it. I place my hand on her waist. “Turn around, Ally. I’ll lift you up.”
As she turns to me I can see it in her eyes. I send her a scene from my dream and she closes her eyes, dropping her head to rest on my chest.
“You too, huh?” she asks.
I hold her hand, and we share the dreams we’ve had. They’re exactly the same.
“Why do you think this is happening?” I ask.
“I’ve no idea,” she says and looks up at me. “Last night, when I had the first dream, Eden was a physical part of it. It was awful and he was hurt.”
She touches my hand again and I see what happened between them. I feel sick at my stomach. “We need to stop this if at all possible, Al.”
Let’s get back to the house. I really don’t want Laura to be upset with us for missing her first breakfast in her new house,” she says.
I lift her up and place her on the seat of the truck. She slides all the way over.
I look over at her and can’t help but to feel awful. “Eden knows it’s not really happening, Ally. I’ll have a talk with him.”
Ally’s car is still not back when I pull into the garage. “Laura is probably fuming by now,” I say.
I take Ally by the hand again. “Come on, All. Let’s face the wrath of Laura together. Maybe that way it won’t be so bad.”
“I know we’re in trouble,” I tell Laura as we enter the kitchen.
“No, you just missed breakfast,” she tells us, rinsing the dishes and putting them in the dishwasher.
“Let me help you, Laura,” Ally says.
“No, Ally. Where the hell did you go?” Why didn’t you take me?” she asks us.
I realize I still have Ally’s hand in mine. I let go and move towards Laura, holding my arms out. She isn’t having any of that, though. “No hugs!” she snaps as she moves away from me. “Not right now. I’m mad at you two.”
“I guess you had better get a dog today. You’ll need company in the dog house,” Ally tells me.
“Oh, he’ll have plenty of company because you and Eden will be in there with him,” she snaps at Ally.
Eden opens the front door, holding a box. “I found baby ducks,” he calls out happily.
Ally almost bounces over to him. He lifts a little black duck up out of the box. “I’m naming mine Daffy,” he says as he cradles the little duck.
“That’s where you were? Buying ducks?” Laura asks.
Eden looks at her. “Yeah, why?”
“I made my first ever breakfast in my first ever house and no one showed up for it. Just me and the garbage disposal had any,” she whines.
Eden sets the box down on the bar, then reaches in to get a cute little yellow duck, taking it to her. “Please just hold this little duck, Laura. It’ll make you feel better and I promise we’ll never ever miss another one of your meals again. If you should ever decide to cook for us again, that is.”
Laura holds the little duck for a minute. A smile spreads over her face finally. She reaches out to hug Eden. “Thanks for the duck, Eden. I love it already.”
Eden brings the box over to Ally. “Would you like to choose a duck, Alyssa?”
There’s one yellow one and one black one left. “I like the little black one,” she tells him as she picks it up and holds it close to heart.
My eyes roam over her breast for a mere second before I regain my control.
We have got to get this shit under control, before we hurt everyone who’s important to us.
CHAPTER 63
EDEN
The girls wait by the fire we built near the pond so we could let the little ducklings swim. Kyle and I are in the woods, searching for more wood for it. My mate and I had a conversation about the two of them earlier and I think it’s time I had a talk with him.
“Alyssa told me about your dream,” I say. “Seems the two of you are having some fun.”
Kyle looks up at me as he reaches for another log. “Fun?” he asks. “I’d not call it that, Eden. I’d call it torture.”
“So making love to Alyssa is torture to you?” I ask.
Kyle turns his back to me as he reaches down for another piece of wood. “It’s not real, Eden.”
“My mate tells me it felt like it was,” I say. “Please, Kyle, I’d like us to have an honest relationship.”
Kyle stops looking for more things to pick up and looks me in the eye. “What do you want to know, dude?” he asks. “You want the truth?”
“Of course,” I say.
He shakes his head. “No, man, you don’t.”
I look away and watch a silk spider’s web blow in the breeze.
He’s right.
“So are we supposed to pretend it’s not happening?” I ask.
He finds a pine cone and picks it up. “Don’t ask me. This is new to me. I can promise you only one thing. I’ll never be able to get physical with your wife. Not in real life.”
“Can I ask you something?” I ask.
He nods.
“If you could and if it wouldn’t hurt anyone, would you?” I ask.
He puts down his arm full of wood and comes to me. His hand lands on my shoulder. “I love her, Eden.”
His words feel like a hammer to my heart. “I know you do.”
He gives me a quick pat and turns away. “There’s no reason to go into scenarios where we get to have our cake and eat it too,” he says, then turns back. “I mean, even if you gave us your blessing to screw the hell out of each other, we could never do that. It isn’t in any of us to hurt each other in any way.”
“I could never give my blessing for that anyway,” I say.
“Of course you couldn’t. I’d wanna whip your ass if you did,” he says with a chuckle.
“I’m sorry, you know,” I say. “I’ve told my wife plenty of times how sorry I am about not following advice which was given to me to have her brought to me when she was thirteen. Yet I’ve never told you.”
“Sorry?” Kyle asks. “What in the world is there to be sorry about? What you see as a mistake, I see as great luck for me. I’m something I could have never been, thanks to you.”
“You don’t feel mad about this in any way?” I ask.
“I did,” he says. “At first. She’s in my life forever, yet I can’t have her physically and I long to. Then I think about people who have it worse. Real victims, real disabilities, real sorrow, and real pain. What do I have? Super powers, no worry over money ever, and great people who have my back while I have theirs.”
“You’ve found the bright side,” I say as I pick up a piece of wood. “It’s a hard life I’ve made for us all.”
“No, man, it’s a great life, Eden,” he says. “Look, we can’t help what happens in our damn dreams. I’m sure plenty of other shit will be worse than Ally and I leading a dream life together. Hell, I don’t even sleep eight hours a day. So you get her all the waking hours.”
I laugh and he laughs too. “Well, at least I have her more.”
“Yeah,” he says. “And what about me? Sure, Ally and I are having a dream baby, but you and she will have actual babies, ones you can hold and watch grow up. Our dreams could end today. Your life together is real and tangible, dude.”
I nod and look up at the darkening sky through the tall pines. “Our Creator must be quite the jokester.”
The bay of a hound dog sounds out in the tall, piney woods which surround the pasture. I look at Kyle as he picks up another piece of wood for the fire. “They sound close.”
He nods. “We better get back to the girls.”
CHAPTER 64
ALYSSA
The sound of dogs p
rompts Laura and me to gather up the ducklings and put them in the box in the back of Kyle’s truck.
“We need to cover the box with something, like a rag or something. It’ll make them stop quacking and go to sleep,” Laura says as she reaches into the truck, retrieving a small towel.
I wink at her. “Such a good mother you will make.”
She laughs. “I can’t have kids. I have to take care of you two.”
My jaw drops. “Laura, you can have kids. When I get pregnant, you should too. That would be perfect.”
Her eyebrows go up, as do her hands. She speaks with them often. “Ally! I’m not married. I can’t promise you that.”
The tilt of my head lets her know I know better than that. “That boy would make an honest woman out of you, Laura.”
She gives me her no-nonsense look she’s so good at. “Al, I don’t know for sure that he and I will end up married. I won’t marry him just because of our commitment to you two, or if I managed to get knocked up by him either.”
“I see. Looks like this guardian thing has both of you feeling the same way. Kyle said just about the same thing to me earlier. I’ll tell you what I told him. I don’t want you two to feel like you have to be together because of this situation. Be together, or don’t. It will change nothing.”
She tucks the ducklings in and pushes the box up into the bed of the truck. “I’m glad to hear you say that. Kyle and I had a talk earlier this morning. We might give our physical relationship a break for a while.”
My eyes go wide, because who would agree to that nonsense? “Why in the hell would you do that? Whose idea was that? What are you thinking?”
“Okay, Ally, slow down on the questions,” she says as she turns to face me. “We both came to that conclusion. Kyle told me about you knowing he had trouble choosing between the two of us all the way back when he was fifteen.”
“That should help you to see he’s liked you from way back. That shouldn’t make you question how you feel about him or he feels about you now.”
Her foot kicks at the dirt as she looks down at it. “The problem is the physical aspect of it all. He never thought about me in any other way except the physical way. He wanted my body, not my mind.”
Taking her by the shoulders, I say, “He loves your mind now, though. It takes a little while to find things like that out, you know.”
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