Dirty Secret Baby

by Alycia Taylor

  “Uh, not much. I’m just messing around. Having fun with Bobby. He’s the real talent in the family,” she said. She still hadn’t looked up at me.

  I moved onto the floor and picked up her drawing. I could see the look of surprise on her face as I did so. She probably thought I wasn’t going to speak to her again. I hadn’t been very nice to her the night before.

  “I don’t know about that. This looks very cool to me. It’s very unique. I think you’re pretty good.”

  She turned to look at me, and she had a frown on her face. She was obviously wondering what I was up to. This was not the same man from the night before. I smiled at her, and she gave me a sad smile back.

  “Hey,” I said.

  “Hey back,” she replied. “Good day at work?”

  I shrugged. “Could’ve been better. The office is a mess without you.”

  She laughed. “That’s good to hear.”

  “I bought dinner for us all. Chicken curry. I thought it would be nice to eat as a family. It’s Pop’s favorite meal, and it smells pretty delicious if you ask me.”

  “I’d like that.”

  We decided to all eat on the floor this time instead of at the table, much to Bobby’s delight. And, despite everything that had happened, we all made an effort to act like a family again. Bobby kept us entertained and had us in fits of laughter, and this time we all talked to one another, and there were no awkward silences. Savannah still seemed confused by my sudden change, but she kept sneaking glances my way and smiling at me, so I knew I had done the right thing. Pop seemed pleased that I was making more of an effort this time around. The food was delicious and a great hit all around.

  “No wonder you love this place,” I said. “This food is amazing.”

  “I told you. I have spent so much money there in the past few years. I think they’re still standing because of me.”

  “Well, they have gained a new customer. That’s for sure. Thanks for a great family meal everyone.”

  Then I stood up, and I saw Bobby immediately frown.

  “Can we come home too?” he asked.

  “For sure! You and mom,” I said.

  Savannah looked surprised but didn’t say anything. We all said our goodbyes to Pop and made our way home. Bobby was in a great mood and seemed happy to be spending the night at home.

  “I like it at Pop’s, but I prefer our home more. I like my bed,” he said. Then he sighed happily. “And one day I will make space in my room for my dog. I’ll put him in the corner and train him. You’ll see, he’ll be the best dog in the world. You won’t get upset with him. You’ll forget he’s there. I’ll teach him good. Now we just have to come up with a cool name for him. I’m making a list.”

  I laughed. “One day, Bobby. Like your mom said, we’ll think about it. Not just yet though.”

  I raised my eyebrows at Savannah. “He doesn’t give up, does he?”

  “Nope. He’s got a strong character. Just like his dad.”

  “And just like his mom.”

  Savannah got Bobby ready for bed, and then we both took turns reading his favorite books to him. He didn’t want to fall asleep and kept interrupting our story to tell us about his plans for his new dog. But, as usual, he eventually got too tired to stay awake. His eyes kept closing, and then he’d force them open, and then he’d close them again. He was fighting a losing battle. I had a feeling he was too scared to sleep in case he woke up and found himself at Pop’s again.

  “Time to go to sleep now, my angel,” Savannah said. “Just imagine all the cool dreams you’re about to have. That’s the best part, remember?”

  He sighed and closed his eyes. “I’m going to dream about a dog,” he said.

  I resisted a laugh and shook my head. I watched as he fell asleep and then we waited a few more minutes just to make sure that he was finally asleep. A small snore came out of his mouth as he breathed in and out, and I chuckled. It was the sweetest sound ever. We switched off the lights and headed upstairs. Once there, I chuckled again.

  “That boy is so cute. I swear he’s going to get to us eventually with the dog story. One of these days one of us is going to end up saying yes. He’s got a way of doing it that isn’t even annoying. You just end up feeling bad for not agreeing with him.”

  She laughed. “I know. I’ve almost said yes a few times. But now is definitely not the right time to get a dog. I’ll have to keep resisting. Hopefully, he’ll lose interest, but I’m not so sure he will. Uh, thanks for a great night. Thanks for the amazing dinner, it was delicious. And, well, it was good to finally hear your voice again. It’s good to be home. Uh, well, goodnight, Axel. I’ll . . . I guess I’ll see you in the morning,” she said and started to make her way out the room.

  I took her hand, and she turned around.

  “Don’t go,” I said.

  She frowned. “What do you mean?”

  I leaned forward and kissed her.

  “Come to the bedroom,” I said. “I’m glad you’re home too.”

  I was glad when she didn’t argue. We walked quietly to my bedroom, and once inside, I closed the door behind us. It was so good to have her back. No matter how I felt about everything, Savannah was home to me. My house now didn’t feel right without her in it. We were going to have to make this work as a team.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Savannah

  I had no idea what had caused Axel to change the way he did. One day he was barely looking at me; the next day he was buying takeout dinner and asking me to sleep over. I didn’t argue though. I walked with him to the bedroom, and just as we got there, I looked at him.

  “Are you sure about this, Axel? I know you’re upset with me. You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

  Axel shook his head as he looked at me. “Don’t you see, Savannah? I always want to.”

  “I—"

  But I didn’t get the chance to say anything more because Axel walked up to me and silenced me with a kiss. I felt like he was trying to make up for the night before because his soft lips held a thousand apologies without having to say a word. My body melted against his and I felt the stress from the last few days finally disappear. We stood like that for a long time, just kissing and holding onto each other. We had to be quiet because of Bobby, but I don’t think anything would’ve changed even if Bobby wasn’t around. There was something different about being together this time. Something gentler than before.

  Axel slowly took my clothes off, taking his time with each element. When my shirt was off, he spent some time kissing my shoulders, my neck, and my breasts, his lips lingering warmly over every part of my upper body before he moved on to taking off my jeans. I did the same with him, and piece by piece, kiss by caress, we ended up facing one another, both completely naked. He took my hand, warmth in his eyes as he led me to the bed.

  We climbed under the covers and kissed, entwining our bodies with each other. While I was with him, I stopped thinking about my fears, and I stopped thinking about Duke. The only thing I could think about at that moment was Axel and the way he was making me feel. His hands were over my body now, touching me, teasing me, and a small moan escaped me as I felt his fingers slip inside me. He pulled me closer, kissed me, and climbed on top of me. I looked up at his beautiful face and wondered why I hadn’t just been honest with him from the start. I felt sad for the six years I’d lived without him by my side. My life would’ve been a lot different with him around from the start. But I had him with me now, and I was going to make sure that I made the most of every single minute with him.

  I arched my back so that he could get deeper inside me. He rocked gently, and every time one of us was close to letting go, we’d stop and kiss instead. Neither of us wanted this moment between us to end, and we were trying to prolong it for as long as possible. He was leaning down on me now, not thrusting, but kissing me instead. My body ached for more of him, but the moment he moved, I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold on any longer.

 
“You’re so beautiful, Savannah,” he said to me.

  I smiled. Other men had told me the same, but I had never believed it. They had only said it when they wanted something from me. Axel meant it. I knew without a doubt that he meant every single word he said to me. Axel thought I was beautiful, and that was the only thing that mattered to me. He fingers trailed my face, and as he reached my lips, I sucked gently on them, my tongue flicking his across fingertips. I watched the look on his face change to passion, and as I sucked on his fingers, he thrust into me. I sighed, savoring the feeling of fullness within me. He was slow at first, but the more I sucked, the harder he pushed. There was no stopping anymore. I leaned back, opened my legs even wider, and bit my lip. We came together, long and hard and more passionate than ever before. He didn’t pull out of me right away. Instead, he lay on top of me and kissed me gently.

  He climbed off me and pulled the duvet up, tucking it around us to keep in the warmth. We didn’t say anything to each other for a while. It was just nice being together, and there didn’t seem to be a need to say anything else.

  After a while, I turned to look at him.

  “You know, I haven’t had all that much sex in the last six years. And I have to say; I’m more than happy to make up for that now.”

  He laughed. “Oh yeah? Well, I’m more than happy to help you with that. You’re amazing, Savannah. Can I tell you a little secret?”

  “Always,” I said and grinned at him.

  “Unlike you, I have had a lot of sex in the last six years.”

  “Hey, is that supposed to make me feel better or something? Because if it is, you’re definitely going about it the wrong way.”

  He chuckled. “Even though I’ve had a lot of sex, it never matched up to that time with you. I tried not to think about it or compare it over the years, but it wasn’t always easy. That time with you . . . well, it changed me. The only reason I slept with so many girls again afterward was because I wanted so bad to forget about you. But you were a very hard person to forget.”

  I sighed. “I couldn’t stop thinking about that time either. How could I?”

  “And yet, you walked away from it,” he said.

  A tear fell down my face, and he wiped it away. I could tell that he wasn’t angry at me anymore. But this wasn’t something that he could easily forget or forgive, and I couldn’t blame him.

  “Yeah, I did. I honestly thought it was the right thing to do. I know it’s hard to understand, but back then, I honestly didn’t want you to get involved. That club . . . they’re not great people. I thought I was doing you a favor, and I thought I was protecting Bobby from everything too. I was wrong, though. I should’ve told you. I should’ve told you then, and I should’ve told you now. I’m sorry. I’m so used to being on my own and fighting my own battles.”

  “Don’t say sorry. I know that you were only doing what you thought was right, and maybe you were. Maybe things would’ve turned out differently if you had told me in the beginning. All I can do is be there for you now. You’ll see; I’m going to protect you. You don’t have to worry about anything again. I’m here, Savannah.”

  “So, does that mean I can stay in your room again?”

  He chuckled. “You better. I hate sleeping here without you.”

  “Bobby is going to be happy when he wakes us and sees us together like this. He’s a clever boy. He knows that something is going on. I think that’s why he’s going on about the dog so much. He’s trying to create a family for us,” I said.

  Axel nodded. “Yeah, he’s a smart one. Think we should get him a dog?”

  I laughed. “You see? He has you already. I’d love to get him one, but not yet. Not with all of this going on. And you and I are still trying to figure things out. I think we should wait until things settled own a bit more and we know what we are doing.”

  “You’re probably right. Well, I know what I want to do now at least.”

  “You do?”

  “Round number two?”

  I chuckled. “I think you’re right. Let’s stop worrying about the future or the past even. Let’s just concentrate on right now. And your plan is absolutely perfect.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Axel

  I lay in bed feeling good about my decision to give Savannah another chance. She wasn’t the bad one in all of this, and I had to keep reminding myself that she’d had to make some tough decisions in life. She needed someone on her side, and I wanted to be there for her. The night before had been wonderful, and just what we needed to reconnect with one another. As I lay there, with her sleeping peacefully by my side, I tried to come up with a plan. It still didn’t feel right that Duke hadn’t been in touch with us yet. Either he had moved on, or he was planning something. And, unfortunately, I was sure it was going to be the latter. I decided that the only way to move on would be to confront him. I would have to go and talk to him. Savannah was not going to be happy with my decision, but it felt like the right thing to do in the situation. I looked down at the sleeping beauty beside me, and I knew that I had to do it for her. She looked so beautiful and peaceful lying beside me. I couldn’t let anything happen to her.

  I looked at the time and was surprised to see that not only had we slept in, but that so had Bobby. I listened in case I could hear him walking around, but there was only silence. Since he’d been living with me, he had never slept in. Not once. I wondered if he was now finally starting to feel like this was home. Maybe he finally felt more relaxed. That was good. I had been worried about him with everything going on. I didn’t want him to be affected by Duke. Safe was exactly how I wanted him to feel. I smiled and wondered how best we could spend our day. Either we could all make breakfast together, or else I could treat them and take them out. Perhaps some breakfast followed by a movie or a trip to the park. I’d been promising Bobby that I would take him to the park for some time now. Hell, maybe we could do breakfast, the park and a movie. Why limit our day? I was looking forward to doing more family things together. It was strange to think that only a few months ago, the only things I did on the weekend were working on bikes, racing, and other bike related things. Sometimes I’d go to the pub and see if I could meet a woman for the night. The whole thing seemed so trivial now. All I wanted was to spend my time with Savannah and Bobby.

  The phone rang beside me and was so loud in the silent room that Savannah opened her eyes immediately in a panic.

  “Don’t worry, it’s the phone,” I said and quickly reached out to answer it. Although I wondered who would call at this time of the morning.

  “Hello, Axel speaking.”

  “Axel, it’s Spike.”

  “Spike? What’s going on?” Spike would never call me so early unless something was wrong, and there was an uncomfortable twist in my stomach at hearing his voice. I knew that something bad had happened. I just knew it.

  “Axel, the shop . . . ”

  “What’s happening?”

  “The shop is in flames.” There was panic in his voice.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I wasn’t even going to come in today. But I decided to go in and work a bit on one of the bikes. And . . . shit. Flames everywhere. I don’t know what to do. I’ve called the fire department, and they are on their way. Oh, I hear the sirens. Good, they’re here. Thank goodness. I feel completely helpless standing here by myself. I still can’t believe this is actually happening. Can you get here too?”

  What was he talking about? A fire? The shop? My heart was beating so hard, I was sure that he could hear it through the phone. I sat up.

  “Oh my god, Spike. That’s crazy. What the hell is going on? Of course, I’ll be right there.”

  I put the phone down and looked at Savannah. She was sitting upright and looking at me with a panicked look on her face.

  “What’s going on?” she asked.

  “The shop is on fire. That was Spike. He went in this morning and found it in flames. He’s asked me to come. What the hell is goi
ng on?”

  She frowned. “A fire? Oh no. Okay, I’m coming with.”

  “What about Bobby?”

  “We’re not staying here alone. We can all come with. I’ll go wake him up.”

  I didn’t argue. She was right. So much for spending a nice family day together. This was the last thing that any of us needed at the moment. I climbed out of bed as if I was in a trance. All I could think about was the shop that I had worked so hard to get. In flames. How could this be? I felt sick just thinking about it. I got changed, and the three of us headed out. I called Pop on the way and asked him to meet us just in case we needed him to take Bobby. Pop had a million questions, and so did Bobby, but I had no answers for them.

  When I got to the shop, I gasped. I hadn’t expected the whole shop to be on fire. I thought that perhaps just a small section would be in flames, not the whole shop. I didn’t realize how bad it was until the moment we arrived and I saw it for myself. I looked on as the fire engulfed the shop. I saw my beautiful wooden sign fall down to the ground. People from the neighborhood had all come out to see what was happening. I felt helpless. I wanted to rush in and help, but I knew there was nothing I could do. Instead, I just watched as the firefighters did their best to calm the fire. They knew what they were doing, and I could see that they would have the fire out soon. I felt sick as I watched the scene in front of me.

  “Oh, Axel, your shop,” Savannah said beside me.

  “It’s all ruined,” I said.

  The fire was now out, and there wasn’t much left of the shop.

  “I’m going to find out what’s going on, stay here,” I said to Savannah, and I rushed off to find a fireman that would talk to me.

  “Hey, sorry, you aren’t allowed here,” the man said as he saw me approaching.

  “This is my shop,” I said. What I probably should’ve said was, this was my shop.

  “Oh shit. You’re Axel?” he asked.

  “That would be me. What the hell is going on? I got the call this morning to say that the shop was on fire. Do you know what happened?”