Well, that had done two things for him. In her anger, she had revealed how she really felt and finally cut the love out of their relationship completely, and she had driven him to work harder and want more out of his family. He would prove to everyone that he was an alpha and he would prove to her that she was wrong. But it had been a long time coming. This hadn’t been the first conversation about manhood that he’d ever had. His first realization had happened many years ago, far from this place.
***
Thirteen Years Ago
Upstate Connecticut Boarding School
Just past midnight, a small group of teens gathered in Gabriel’s dorm room plotting to get off the school grounds to celebrate their win in the soccer tournament earlier that day and his roommate’s 16th birthday. It supposed to be a joyous occasion, one that called for extraordinary celebration – something that couldn’t be done in the dorms.
“We have a small window to do this, guys. I paid the security guard $400 to turn his head long enough for us to get off the grounds. Then if we get caught after that, it’s on us,” Kelsey said, flipping her red ponytail off her shoulder. “If we’re going to go at all, we better do it now.” She eyed Gabriel, who sat across the room on his bed with his fingers laced, still in his pajama bottoms and slippers.
“Is he going or what?” one of the other students asked in a frustrated, nasally whine.
Gabriel hated to be the party pooper, but this wasn’t the smartest plan that he’d ever heard. “I’m simply saying that we stand a very good chance of getting caught tonight.” His mossy green eyes glared at the young Kelsey Whitten with sudden contempt. “Some of us can’t afford to have any more run-ins with the headmaster.”
Kelsey gaffed at his guarded response. “Since when have you ever been called to the head master’s office except to receive another ass-kissing award?”
The teens giggled under their breath.
Gabriel rolled his eyes. “I wasn’t talking about me.” He was, however, talking about his roommate, Kline, who was one demerit short of being kicked out of the boarding school and sent back home to parents who already couldn’t afford tuition and depended heavily on academic scholarships and Klein’s talent for rugby.
“I don’t need a babysitter,” Kline said defensively, slipping on his black pea coat. “It’s my birthday. I want to go out and get a beer. Rebecca knows a place that will serve us.” He looked over at the teen like she held the keys to the city. If nothing else, she definitely held the keys to his heart.
“She might know a place that will serve her,” Gabriel corrected. “I’m sure some bar keep with a taste for young pussy doesn’t mind slipping her a drink every once and a while, but when everyone shows up trying to get in and looking like a trust fund field trip to observe the financially disadvantaged locals, no one is going to give you anything but a swift kick in the ass.”
“What does he know?” Rebecca said, looking at her watch. “Leave him, already. He’s a loser. Taking him with him is only going to cause us bad luck.”
Gabriel rolled his eyes. It had nothing to do with luck. “Why because I’m the only guy who hasn’t banged you?”
Rebecca wasn’t the least bit moved by his response. “No, just the only guy I wouldn’t screw.” She opened the door slightly to make her point. “Who’s going with me and who’s staying here with dear old dad?”
“Count me in,” Kline said, disappointed that Gabriel had led the revolt against his birthday plans.
Gabriel stood up. Even at sixteen, he stood a towering six-feet, six inches tall. “Klein, don’t,” he warned. “You know what the headmaster said.”
Klein looked around at the small contingent focused on him. “Headmaster Wilson can kiss my ass, man.” He turned and headed out of the door; the others following suit.
“Your loss,” Rebecca said, intentionally the last one to leave the room. She smiled and winked at him as she closed the door behind her.
Alone in the room, Gabriel stood looking at the door and feeling like maybe he had made the wrong decision. It felt uncomfortable being one who was so risk adverse.
The connecting bathroom door swung open and his father emerged. “That was…pathetic.”
Gabriel’s eyes grew big. “What are you doing here?”
“Wasn’t today the big game?” Ivan asked, walking around the small bedroom.
“Yeah, we won,” Gabriel said, sucking his teeth.
“Yeah, I know,” Ivan answered sarcastically.
“Where you here?” Gabriel asked, hoping that his father had been there to see him win the game. Today, more than any other day, he had played his best game, so much so that he had shocked himself.
Picking up Gabriel’s dirty jersey, Ivan looked at the letters stitched on the back of it. MEDLOV. Quietly, he felt a tinge of pride. With his eyes still on the jersey, he responded, “I wasn’t there physically, but I was around.”
“I should be grateful,” Gabriel said, locking the bedroom door. “Mom didn’t even call. She’s in Uganda saving lives. She can’t exactly be burdened with raising one.” He was eternally sore about her life’s work, only because it conflicted with him having a real one.
Ivan snickered at his son’s self-pity. “You feel sorry for yourself, eh?” He threw the jersey on the back of the wooden chair, pushed up to the desk, eyeing him with disapproval.
Gabriel knew his father well enough to know that he didn’t feel any pity for him or his situation. He had spent his entire childhood hearing him preach that the world didn’t care about him or his petty little problems. Eventually, Gabriel began to believe it.
“No, I just wished that she gave a damn,” Gabriel pounced down on his twin bed, gangly legs hanging off the side.
“That’s the price of getting older. People give less and less of a fuck,” Ivan said, reaching for his side. He winced. “But you know, this is part of life. You will do better if you just accept it.”
“Accept that she doesn’t give a damn?” Gabriel asked, hoping that his father might for once give a comforting word.
Ivan turned up his lips and looked at his son, a spitting image of himself. “Accept that maybe she never did.” He shrugged thinking of how his relationship had played out with his mother. “It’s okay. This happens. It’s not the end of the world.”
The way that Ivan tried to argue the situation made Gabriel smirk. “God, I hope I don’t grow up to be as cynical as you.”
Ivan smiled wide, showing his perfect white teeth. “I’m not cynical. I’m…disinterested in teenage drama.”
“So you were listening the whole time in the bathroom?” Gabriel asked, noticing that his father was obviously in some pain. He wanted to ask if Ivan was okay, but he knew that even if he was not, he’d never say.
“Yes. I was listening. Are you surprised? I was five feet away. It’s pretty hard to ignore.”
Gabriel felt embarrassed. His father heard him being a wimp. Great. “What would you have done? I mean, the headmaster is expecting us to sneak out and expecting Kline to be one of the main culprits. He is going to come looking for us in another hour or two. It was the right thing to do.”
Ivan frowned and put up a finger. “Are you asking me for advice?” That was new.
“I’m asking what you would have done, knowing very well, that I would not have done the same?” Gabriel explained quickly.
“So this is just a comparison question?” Ivan asked.
“Yeah, you could say that.”
Ivan raised his brow. “I would have gone, enjoyed myself and fucked the redhead in the bathroom right up the ass.” A smile crossed his lips.
Gabriel cringed at his father’s crassness. “But what if you knew that you were going to get caught?”
Ivan shrugged, “If I am you, who cares? Like the girl said, you’ve never been in trouble. The headmaster would let you off with a slap on the hand, especially since you won the game by eight points.”
Gabriel sat quietly thinking. So his
father had been around for the game.
Ivan sat on the opposite twin bed and looked over at Gabriel, scanning through one of Klein’s Playboy magazines.
“What about Klein?” Gabriel asked, truly concerned.
“What about him? His life. His choices. Every man for himself,” Ivan said, resting back on Klein’s bed and grunted. “When are you going to learn that, boy?”
“Maybe never,” Gabriel answered, disappointed in himself. He rested his head back on the pillow and looked at the ceiling. “I’ve been doing some reading.”
“You’re always reading.” Gabriel reminded Ivan of Dmitry in that way. When they were younger, he always had his head in a book.
“Evidently, I’m a beta male even though I come from an alpha male dominated family.” His voice cracked in pubescent displeasure. His brow furrowed. “I’m like a born loser or something.”
“Beta male, huh?” Ivan’s voice was calm and even. “This means you don’t rock the boat, right?”
“Obviously,” Gabriel said, rubbing a hand through his hair. “I could be having fun, but I’m here, because I’m too afraid to get in trouble and piss anyone off.”
Ivan chuckled. He liked that about Gabriel. It meant that the boy was still innocent, something that he had never been.
“What?” Gabriel asked. “How is that funny?”
“Enjoy it. It won’t last…this beta thing that has you so worked up. It’s just a phase. Like when you used to piss sitting down as a baby. It was because your dick was too short. That’s all. Eventually, it grew. Eventually, you will grow.”
Gabriel cringed at the comparison. “You don’t just stop being a beta one day, Dad. It’s a lifetime curse. I’ll always be just a yes man, one of those people who go with the flow and never do anything adventurous or courageous.”
“Look, you might know books, but I know my family line. I know where we come from and there is no room for beta boys in it. Give yourself time. One day, you’ll wake up and the time for reason will be gone. You’ll strike first and ask questions later. Eventually, you will be the alpha male in the room.”
“Does this metamorphosis happen soon?” Gabriel joked.
“I’m no scientist. I can only tell you that it will happen…eventually.” Ivan’s cell phone rang. Pulling it out, he looked at the number and threw the phone over to Gabriel.
“Who is it?” Gabriel asked, holding the phone.
“It’s your mother,” Ivan said, popping three oxycodone for the pain and taking a swig of the water on the table. “What? You thought she forgot?” He snickered. “She never forgets.”
***
Pulling himself from thoughts of his dead father and his unremarkable youth, Gabriel snapped to attention as the large iron gates to the Medlov compound opened and the armed security waved the convoy inside. The processional broke off, with the bikes and other vehicles veering off toward the garages, while his vehicle moved toward the circular drive in front of the palatial white mansion where two armed guards stood on each side of the large limestone porch.
Life was odd. He had spent his youth thinking that Dmitry Medlov was the devil incarnate. Now, he was a surrogate to him and the men responsible for his father’s death. How was that being the alpha male in the room? If his father could see him now, he’d probably roll right over in his grave. But that was a thought for another time, when he was not here. He couldn’t think about it all too much, living in the same place that his father had been killed, swearing allegiance to the man who was once married to his grandmother. It brought up too many emotions and made him feel too distant from everyone around him.
The SUV stopped in front of the mountain of steps that led up to the front doors, and Boris quickly jumped out and opened Gabriel’s door, but he sat in the back seat, eyes frozen on the entryway.
Oblivious to Gabriel’s melancholy mood, Boris cleared his throat. “You okay, boss?” he asked with a frown, waiting for him to get out of the truck. He looked back at the house to see if there was something wrong.
“I’m fine,” Gabriel said, locking his emotions away. Inhaling a deep breath, he stepped out onto the cobblestone drive and straightened his suit. “Take my things up to my room.” Handing off his computer, he made his way up the steps and in through the large entryway.
As he approached the doors, they opened and a maid stepped out of his way and dipped her head to greet him.
“Welcome home,” she said in a Hispanic accent.
“Gracias,” Gabriel said, whisking past her. His feet echoed on the marble floor as he crossed the foyer and was met by the butler.
“Boss Anatoly would like for you to read this first,” the butler said, passing him a note.
“Really?” Gabriel took it and opened the small piece of paper. IF THE SHIPMENT IS JACKED, WE HAVE TO COVER THE COST AND HAND DELIVER A NEW SHIPMENT TO UKRAINE.
Fucking great, he thought to himself. More complications. Crumpling the paper in his hand, he stuffed it in his pocket with a balled up fist. “Where is Anatoly?” Gabriel asked, nostrils flaring.
“Outside with the others on the veranda, sir.” He saw the sweat forming on Gabriel’s forehead. “Shall I take your coat for your and fetch you a glass of water?”
“I need something a little stronger than water, Aesop. Thank you.” Easing it off, Gabriel passed his suit jacket to the butler and headed for the back yard to see Anatoly and find out why suddenly they were responsible for a free shipment of $2,000,000s’ worth of product with an $8,000,000 profit. If he had known that, he would have agreed to the private escort in the beginning with Allan Roman. After all, he was trying to cut the work for them, not create more.
***
Gabriel heard a jolly commotion as he approached the sun room that led out to the back yard. Stopping at the sliding glass doors, he watched his family for a minute in their happy bliss. They looked like something out of Southern Living ad, minus the armed guards.
Out on the large veranda overlooking the manicured grounds and the Olympic size swimming pool, the party had been going for quite some time even though it was only a quarter past one in the afternoon. With the Isley Brothers’ Summer Breeze playing on the stereo, beverages flowing and finger foods lining the picnic tables, the grill out unfolded.
Royal sat in her lawn chair in a black sarong and black one-piece swimming suit watching on bemused as her twin boys played together under the large patio fans on the specially-laid soft flooring. Renee sat beside her in a white halter dress that contrasted with her dark brown skin rocking her baby girl in her arms, and Briggy sat on the end in the sun in a hot pink two-piece, working on her tan.
As usual, Anatoly was at the grill, flipping burgers and drinking beer. Dmitry was on his stomach, sprawled out playing with his sons. And Vasily, their former head security man and now member of the council, was sitting down by the pool with his wife watching the older kids swim.
It was all tranquil enough. So much so that he hesitated to even interrupt, knowing exactly how his presence would polarize everything. However, he couldn’t just avoid his family. He might as well crash and burn the party.
Pulling open the door, he stepped outside, instantly grabbing everyone’s attention. “Hey,” he said, walking past a guard, who stood just out of view.
Anatoly waved him over. “Good. You’re here. Come get a beer with me.”
Royal turned and smiled at Gabriel, glad to see him back. “You’re missing the cookout, man.”
“I see,” Gabriel said, nodding at Dmitry. “What got into you guys?”
“It’s a nice day,” Dmitry answered, eyes still on his sons. “Why spend it inside?”
Going rigid as soon as she saw him, Briggy took off her shades as Gabriel approached her. Sitting up, she mouthed hello and pushed her blonde hair off her shoulders.
Kneeling beside her lawn chair, Gabriel looked down at her slightly bulging stomach. “How are you…two?”
“The doctor says that we’re fine,” she said, r
ubbing her stomach. “All the blood work and ultrasound came back normal.”
Gabriel noticed that she was glowing, no doubt because of her condition. Despite their conflict, pregnancy suited her. “Good. I’m glad to hear it.” His brow furrowed when he noticed that she had repaired the diamond bracelet that she had broken during their argument and put it back on her wrist. That had to mean something. “I’m sorry I didn’t make it back in time. Work sort of went longer than expected.”
“That’s okay.” Briggy’s eyes, judgmental with every blink, said that she didn’t believe him, but for once she didn’t verbalize it. Instead, she tried to stay positive. “There is always the next appointment next month and the month after that.” Her voice trailed off.
“I will do my best to make it.” Gabriel felt awkward, having nothing more to say, but over the last few months, he had talked himself to death. Besides, the tension was already thick enough between them to cut with a knife. There was no reason to push their limits with excess conversation that would more than likely lead to an argument. He stood back up and looked over at Anatoly. “Let me go over here and make sure that he isn’t burning up anything.”
“Wait.” She reached out and grabbed his hand. Her eyes pleaded with him not to go, even if it was only a few feet away.
He looked down at her, but didn’t say a word.
Briggy swallowed down her nervousness and pride as she looked up at him towering over her. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about what happened between us.” Her bottom lip trembled, indicating she was close to tears.
Not already.
Gabriel looked around as the alarms started to go off in his head. This wasn’t exactly the place for this kind of conversation. Although everyone appeared to be talking among themselves and ignoring them all together, he was certain that wasn’t really the case. “Let’s talk about it later, okay?” He patted her hand. “I mean, when we are alone.”
Gabriel's Regret: Book 1 (The Medlov Men Series 2) Page 5