by S. K. Hardy
Hawk looked at the number again then glanced at his watch. It was late. He probably should wait until the morning to call, but he couldn’t. He’d waited long enough. Dialing the number Angel sent him he brought the phone up to his ear and waited impatiently as it rang. Finally, someone picked up on the other end. He immediately heard laughter and loud music blaring in the background. Surprise sobered Hawk. It almost sounded like a party. Not what he was expecting.
Thought she was sitting around pining away, didn’t you? His ego taunted slyly.
“Hello?” Raven’s voice came through the line, sputtering the greeting around a fit of vibrant giggles.
Hawk’s hand momentarily tightened on the phone. Damn, she sounded good.
“Hello?” she asked again, taking a big breath to try to get herself under control. “Is anyone there?”
“Rae? Hey. It’s–”
“Hawk?” she shrieked. The amusement instantly left her voice.
“Yeah. How are you, baby?”
“What are you...h-how did you did you get this number?”
CHAPTER 7
“You had to know I wouldn’t stop until I found you.” Hawk skillfully avoided Raven’s question. Once the shock wore off she’d figure out it was Angel. “How are you?”
“I, um, I’m f-fine,” she stuttered.
“Good.” The tense silence stretched between them. “Rae, we need to talk.”
“I don’t think–”
“Five minutes. Can you give me that?” When she didn’t answer, Hawk took her silence as a yes. “I’ve missed the hell out of you, Rae. You have no idea. Why did you leave like that?”
Her voice came out a hollow whisper. “You know why.”
“You could’ve waited, given me a chance to explain things.”
“I didn’t need you to explain anything to me. Believe me, everything is crystal clear.” Her tone grew stronger, colder, with each word she spoke. “You used me the same as you did Janice and Gwynn. That’s right, isn’t it?”
“No! I never used you. Never. Deep down inside I think you know that. Whatever happened with anyone else happened before you and I started seeing each other. They didn’t mean anything to me, but you? You meant everything. You mean everything.” Hawk swallowed hard when she didn’t respond. “Raven...baby, say something.”
“You have three minutes.”
Hawk bit back a frustrated curse. She sounded more distant than ever. “Okay, look. I admit I should’ve been straight with you, but I am now. No more secrets.”
“But that’s not exactly true, is it?”
“What’s not true?” Hawk asked, truly confused.
“You’re not being completely honest with me, are you?”
“Yes. I told you–”
“Why did you first start pursuing me? And don’t tell me we had some magical connection and you just couldn’t get me off your mind.”
“I wouldn’t be lying if I said that, would I? We had a helluva connection and you stayed on my mind even after the first time we met.”
“Wow.”
“What?”
“You’re good. Even better than I first thought. I see that now. It’s still hard to believe I fell for your bullshit the way I did,” Raven scoffed. “I mean, for years, my job depended on my ability to put people like you on the stand and sniff out their deception. The one time I needed those instincts to be beyond reproach, they failed me. That, more than anything, tells me I made the right decision by resigning.”
Hawk glanced down and closed his eyes. He discovered she had quit her job after she left. He hated the fact that she’d done that. “You were an excellent prosecutor. You didn’t have to resign.”
“Oh really? What were my options? To remain an ADA under whatever corrupt District Attorney the Pattels decided to put there? Or maybe I should’ve taken your uncle and your father up on their offer to be the next DA on their payroll. Is that what you...” Raven abruptly stopped talking and let out a bitter laugh. “Oh my god. You did it again. You found a way to avoid my question, didn’t you?”
“I’m not avoiding anything,” Hawk said, even though she was right. He did it without even thinking. “What exactly do you want to know?”
Raven’s tone told him she was losing patience. “I asked you what made you decide to pursue me. My sister seems to think you and Angel planned this, planned for you to seduce as a way of...of...getting me to stop interfering in his marriage and in both of your illegal dealings.”
Dammit. “Nikki told you that?”
“Yes. She confronted Angel about it when she first became suspicious, but of course he denied it. Or no, not really denied it, avoided answering her questions. Like you’re doing now. For once, be honest with me without all the smoke and mirrors. Did you and Angel put all of this into motion?”
Hawk glanced around, but instead of seeing the bustle of activity around him, he weighed his options in his head. If he sidestepped the question, Raven would probably hang up. If he told her the truth, hell she’d probably still hang up, but he might have a better chance of getting through to her before she did.
“Yes. Angel and I initially planned for me to get involved with you for the reasons you stated.”
“You son of a bitch. I should’ve known.”
“But I called it off. I wanted to see what this...this thing between us was and where it might go. Maybe it would end up being nothing or maybe...” Hawk paused, reluctant to say too much. However, Raven wasn’t a woman he could bullshit. Plus, they were way past that now. “Maybe it would end up being everything.”
“You’re such a got damn liar.”
“Hand to God I’m telling you the truth.”
“The truth? Really?” Raven spat out. “I doubt you even know what the truth is. Every time you open your mouth to speak you inhale oxygen and exhale lies.”
“I know you don’t believe me but for reasons I still cant explain, you were in my blood and I didn’t like it. I’ll be honest with you. I figured that if I just slept with you, I could get you out of my head or something, but it didn’t work.” Hawk’s face grew firm with resolve. “You belong to me, Rae, and I’ll be damned if I let you go.”
A sound half way between a gasp and a ragged sob flowed through the phone and hit him right in the chest. “I hate you so much.”
“No you don’t,” Hawk replied quietly. His voice deepened an octave to a level so intimate it almost felt as if he were standing right in front of her “You might hate what I did but you don’t hate me. Your body doesn’t hate me. Even now I’m willing to bet its reacting to just the memory of my touch. My kiss. The two of us making love like we can never get enough–”
“Stop! Just...stop...” Raven let out a sound similar to a person drowning and gasping for divine intervention. She took several deep gulps of air before continuing in a noticeably calmer tone. “This is so typical of you. Reducing everything to sex.”
“If that’s all I wanted I could get it anywhere. Right?”
Hawk started walking back to the restaurant. He knew she was scared and trying to downplay the connection they shared but it had an iron clad grip on her that refused to let go. Even though they were thousands of miles apart, their bodies still had a bond that no amount of distance could ever break.
“And you did, didn’t you. Get sex anywhere you wanted, I mean.” The sharp edge shadowing Raven’s voice bordered on disgust. “Maybe I should try it. Indulging in sex whenever the mood strikes me. Maybe it’s the secret to easing my pain, erasing the hurt. What do you think?”
Hawk stopped in his tracks. He knew she was deliberately trying to rile him, and as much as he hated to admit it, she was accomplishing her goal. Hawk would indulge her anger if that made her feel better, but as far as letting her think he was okay with her even entertaining the idea of being with another man, that shit wasn’t happening.
“Listen to me Raven, and listen well. I know you’re upset with me–”
“Upset?” she sn
eered.
“And I know I hurt you,” Hawk continued. He knew his next words would set her off but nothing on earth could stop them from being put out into the universe. “I swear to God, if I find out that you let another man touch you, I will kill him.”
“You have more gall than anyone I’ve ever met, do you know that? Do you?” Raven screamed in outrage.
“I sure the fuck do so that’s how you know I’m speakin’ nothin’ but truth. If you still doubt that, try me.”
The silence on the phone was filled with Raven’s harsh breathing, but by that time, Hawk was just as furious. The very thought of her with another man drove him over the edge. Maybe he should’ve expressed himself in a different way, but he couldn’t help it. Raven was his.
By the time she spoke, her voice was calm, but still not quite in control. “You’ve gone well past the five minutes I promised you, so I’m going to hang up now. Hopefully, this has given you a chance to unburden yourself and ease your conscience.”
“Rae–”
“Before I hang up let me give you a bit of advice. Live your life, Hawk, because I intend to live mine. To the fullest. This is the last time I’ll allow you to take up space in my head. From now on you’ll be just a memory of someone from my past–and not a very pleasant one.”
“Dammit Raven!”
“To sum it all up: Fuck you.” And with that pleasantly worded conclusion, she disconnected the call.
Hawk’s fingers tightened on the phone. He slowly lowered his arm, but didn’t move for several minutes as he replayed the conversation over and over in his head. Once again, he let his temper get the best of him. Great, Pattel. Just great.
Instead of going back inside the restaurant, Hawk walked to the reserved spot where his car was parked. He was supposed to fly out to Miami in a couple of days to check on the progress of his newest project. However, now seemed as good a time as any. He needed to keep busy, find something to occupy his time because if he didn’t he would drive himself crazy.
He needed a change of scenery to put things in perspective and come up with a better plan. Rae couldn’t really think this was the end. No way. If she knew him as well as he thought she knew him–she’d better enjoy her little reprieve while it lasted.
CHAPTER 8
“We’re here, sir. Excuse me, Mr. Pattel?”
Hawk blinked when Danny called his name. Glancing out the window, he belatedly realized they had come to a stop in front of the museum where tonight's gala would be held. Attending the event was the last thing Hawk was in the mood to do tonight. However, this particular fundraiser was one his mother founded before her death, so it was special to his entire family. There was no way he could miss it.
During the ride over, his mind stayed occupied with thoughts of Raven and their last conversation three weeks ago. He'd called her several times since then but of course hadn’t been successful in getting her on the phone. Each time the staff answered they informed him that she was either out or unavailable to take his call. Hawk knew it was intentional; they had a standing order to give him the same bullshit answer whenever he called.
Finally he’d grown tired of it. Realizing that he would get nowhere taking that route, Hawk decided there was only one thing left for him to do: fly to Angel's Cove and speak to her face to face. He would be leaving in the morning.
He should’ve flown to the island the moment he found out it was where she'd run off to almost two months ago. Neither Raven nor Angel would like it, but at this point he could give less than a damn about angering either one of them. His patience was frayed and at its very end. He wanted Raven in New York with him where she belonged. They could fight and argue all got damn day if need be but that's what they would do until things got straight between them.
Danny opened the back door of the Denali and stood to the side. With his expression one of resolve and determination, Hawk stepped out of the vehicle and buttoned his tuxedo jacket. “I don't plan on being long,” he told his driver. “Be ready to come back in an hour, hour and a half at the most, a’ight?”
“Yes, sir,” Danny answered, then added under his breath. “Try not to have too much fun.”
Hawk paused mid-step when he heard the touch of sarcasm in Danny’s voice. Slowly swiveling his head, he glared at the other man over his shoulder. “What was that?”
However, Danny had already rounded the hood of the truck and opened the door. “Nothing, sir. I’ll be waiting on your call whenever you’re ready.”
Hawk took a step towards the truck to follow up on Danny’s little comment, but Danny closed the door and pulled off into traffic before he could do so. His face stretched tight, Hawk stared at the taillights of the luxury SUV for several seconds more.
He knew where Danny’s sarcasm came from. He admitted his temper had been short lately; he snapped at almost everyone in his path. His employees probably thought he’d lost his fuckin’ mind, especially the staff at the new restaurant he was in the processing of opening in Miami. Good thing he didn’t pay them to think.
Determined to get the next hour over with, Hawk turned and headed towards the venue. However, his pace slowed when he saw the red carpet he was expected to stop and take pictures on. For a moment he seriously contemplated turning around and just leaving, but he dismissed the idea as quickly as it came to him. Again, this wasn’t just any charity event. No matter his mood, he didn’t have a choice. He had to show up, for no other reason than to support and honor his mother’s memory. Nothing was more important than that.
After posing for the obligatory photos and doing a couple of brief interviews, Hawk managed to extricate himself from those mandatory duties. Once inside the museum, he glanced around at the sea of elegantly dressed patrons enjoying the philanthropic celebration. The venue tonight was filled to capacity with ridiculously wealthy people. A lot of money would be raised for an extraordinary cause, and that was a very good thing.
Making his way through the crowd was a slow process. Hawk was stopped every few feet by acquaintances, both business and personal, that he was familiar with. By the time he made his way to Lucas and Lorenzo, more than thirty minutes passed.
Lucas glanced down at his watch before frowning at Hawk. “About time you showed up. What took you so long?”
“Good to see you too, big brother. I’m here now, right? That’s all that matters.” Hawk clasped Lucas’ hand and leaned in for a brief hug before doing the same with his cousin. “What’s up, Lo? Ya’ll were scared I was gon’ leave you here to get through the night alone or something?”
“Yeah right. You’re not that crazy.” Lorenzo replied. They exchanged playful jabs until Lucas cut in.
“Where’ve you been?” Lucas asked quietly, keeping his eyes trained on Hawk. His handsome, chiseled face was a mixture of his mother’s beauty and his father’s sharp lines. “And I don’t just mean tonight. No one’s seen or heard from you since the restaurant two weeks ago.”
The grin Hawk had been wearing slowly faded inch by inch. He didn’t have the patience to deal with his brother’s shit tonight. “I’ve been busy workin’ my ass off, that’s where. The restaurant in Miami won’t open itself, will it?”
Lorenzo chuckled. “I bet everybody there kind of wishes it would. From what I’ve heard, you’ve been hell to be around, cous. Guess I don’t have to ask why.”
Ignoring the way Lucas kept his eyes trained on him, Hawk gave Lorenzo a cool stare that thawed a bit when he remembered someone he’d seen on the way in. The corner of his mouth turned up in a mischievous smirk. He knew exactly how to shut Lorenzo up.
“Seems to me you got other things you need to focus on other than what I’m doin’ at the restaurant.”
“Such as?” Lorenzo asked cautiously. He recognized that gleam in Hawk’s eye. It was never good for the recipient.
“Such as the fact that CeeCee Mills is here. Saw her a few minutes ago. She lookin’ gooood, too, bruh.” Hawk closed his eyes and bit down on his bottom lip. “Mmph.�
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Lorenzo eyed Hawk with wary suspicion before scanning the river of faces around them. “Where?”
“Over there talking to the Winn’s.” Hawk nodded towards the area he’d just come from before continuing in a sly tone. “You never did say much about the time the two of you spent together. What gives?”
“You mean the same way you haven’t really told us anything about Raven Randolph?” Lorenzo’s stormy gaze slid back to Hawk. He knew he hit his mark when Hawk’s expression turned guarded. Satisfied, that he’d scored a point, he went back to scoping out the room.
“Lo’s right,” Lucas added, watching Hawk closely. “I mean, you didn’t tell us much about what happened between you and Raven. Exactly what does she mean to you?”
“Can we not talk about this?” Hawk mumbled. His mood was turning darker as the seconds ticked by.
“Why not? You must have gotten really close to her to disrespect our uncle like you did at the restaurant. Don’t you think you owe us an explanation?”
“I don’t owe you shit, Lucas.” Turning to face his brother, the warning to back off was thick in Hawk’s voice.
“The hell you don’t,” Lucas vehemently threw back. “And while we’re at it, what’s up with you and Angel? You walked out of the restaurant with him and never came back.”
Lorenzo stared at Hawk as well. It was obvious he wanted to know just as much as Lucas did.
A harsh puff of air blew from Hawk’s mouth. This was one of the reasons he had been reluctant to come tonight. The last thing he needed was an interrogation. At times Lucas acted like he was his father instead of his older brother. “I’m not gettin’ into this with you right now.”
But Lucas refused to let up. “When, then? Huh? Like I said, you been ghost for almost two damn weeks. You won’t answer the phone. Won’t return a text. So tell me, just when do you think you’ll have time to talk, Hawk? Later tonight? Tomorrow maybe? Oh, wait. You won’t be here tomorrow will you? You’ll be on your way to the Caribbean. Right?”