by S. K. Hardy
Raven’s lips parted to respond, but instead she looked away without speaking. Hawk knew she was scared of what was happening between them. Hell, he was scared too but he was working on a time crunch. The week she promised him was almost up. Sooner or later Raven had to admit how she felt about him.
When she remained silent and tight lipped, he turned back to the elevator and stabbed the button with more force than he intended. What was he doing wrong? He just couldn’t seem to catch a break. A higher power had to be testing his faith because he’d never had to work this hard for a woman in his life.
He knew he’d made mistakes with her in the past. He readily admitted that. His father used to always tell him that as long as you learn from them, mistakes were proof that a man is trying. Well, he was. He’d already made a fool of himself in front of a room full of people at the charity event, chased her all over got damn New York City like a dog sniffing out clues, and lastly, fought over her like a high school jock battling for the head cheerleader. Nothing he did seemed to be working. Was all of this worth it?
As they rode the elevator up to the restaurant in silence, Hawk glanced over at her and reluctantly answered his own question. Damn right it was. Raven was worth every moment of emotional energy he had put into this so far, because quite honestly? She was it. He couldn’t see himself with anybody else. Period. Whether he liked it or not, he was going to have to jump through whatever hoops blocked his path until he got what he wanted. Anything else was not even worth thinking about.
CHAPTER 21
As the tour of the restaurant upstairs progressed, the tension between Raven and Hawk eased a bit. She tried to remain aloof and uninterested, but it didn’t last long, especially when she met Ryan. They hit it off instantly, laughing and bouncing ideas off the other as if they’d known each other most of their lives. Before Hawk realized it, he found himself trailing behind the two of them as they discussed the restaurant in animated voices as if they owned the place and he was just along for the ride.
As Hawk watched the excitement bubbling from her, he couldn’t help but smile. He knew she didn’t realize it, but Raven had a talent for this sort of thing. He noticed it last night. Today only confirmed it. If he could give her this after being responsible for her losing her career, it would go a long way towards helping her forgive him.
As if sensing that his thoughts were on her, Raven turned her head and caught him staring. Hawk half expected her smile to slip away, but it didn’t. The look between them lingered. Raven’s expression softened. Her eyes lowered momentarily, as if checking on her internal emotions. When she looked up at him again, the corner of Hawk’s mouth lifted in an answering smile. At that exact moment, Ryan excused himself to take a phone call. Hawk took a step towards Raven, but paused when he heard someone call her name.
“Raven? Is that you?”
Hawk’s eyes narrowed when they fell on one of the laborers helping to finish the installation of the commercial kitchen. The man had just walked out of what would be the second of two large walk-in freezers when he spotted Raven and stopped in his tracks.
“Raven, it’s me. Benny,” he said with a wide grin stretching across his redbone colored face. When it seemed like Raven drew a blank as to his identity, he prodded her memory further. “You know, ‘Chief’. From the old neighborhood.”
But Hawk had been watching Raven’s face. She instantly remembered the man, but it was obvious she didn’t want to acknowledge it. Her gaze darted to Hawk. When she found him staring at her, she quickly looked back at the man with a smile that Hawk noticed right away was forced.
“Benny, of course I know who you are. How are you?”
“I’m great! Damn ma, it’s good to see you!” He hurried towards her with arms outstretched to give her a hug, but stopped at the last minute and looked at his hands and clothes with a grimace. “Sorry. I’m dirty from workin’. Don’t wanna mess up that pretty white suit of yours.” His eyes slowly travelled over her, lingering at her breasts on the way down and snagging over her hips on the way back up before settling back on her face. “Girl, you lookin’ good. Even more beautiful than you were when you were younger, if that’s possible.”
Giving Hawk another nervous glance, she ignored Benny’s last comment and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “So, um, are you working here or...?”
“Yeah, yeah. At least until the place is finished. But, hey...” He lifted his chin towards Ryan with a sly grin. “If you got any pull with the boss man over there maybe you can get me hired on permanently after it’s open.”
Raven shook her head helplessly. “Well, I...um...”
“Any pull she would have is with me. I’m the owner.” Seeing how uncomfortable she was Hawk moved to her side and slipped a steadying arm around her waist. He didn’t miss the way Benny’s eyes followed the possessive gesture.
Good. He didn’t know who this mu’fucka was but he needed to step the fuck off. When Benny glanced up, Hawk pulled Raven closer and visually sent a message to the other man that he would have to be blind to miss: She belonged to him.
Continuing to study Benny closely Hawk stretched a hand out and introduced himself. “Hawk Pattel.”
Benny’s eyes rounded wide, telling Hawk he knew who he was. His gaze bounced to Raven then back to Hawk. “I, uh, wouldn’t wanna get your hand dirty, Mr. Pattel.”
Hawk’s shoulder lifted in a lazy shrug. “Getting dirty has never bothered me.” Again, another deliberate message–or warning. However Benny chose to look at it was fine with him. “And call me Hawk.”
Benny wiped his hands on his dusty shirt then shook his hand. “Benny Thompson. Good to meet you, Hawk.”
“So how do you and Raven know each other again?”
“We used to –”
“Live in the same neighborhood.” Raven quickly cut in before Benny could finish. When Hawk turned to look at her, she pressed her lips together and averted her eyes.
“Yeah,” Benny nodded slowly, giving her a sidelong glance. “We from the same ‘hood. Knew a lot of the same people. What has it been, fifteen years since we seen each other, Rae Rae?”
“Yes. About that, I guess,” Raven answered reluctantly.
Hawk didn’t miss the way the nickname easily slipped past Benny’s lips. “So you knew each other when you were teenagers...”
“Well, Rae was a teenager. I was a little older. Used to run with her brother.”
Hawk felt Raven’s body stiffen beside him. His hand tightened until she relaxed and leaned into him.
“Speakin’ of which,” Benny continued. “How’s your mom and pops doin’? Haven’t seen them or your sister in a long time.”
“They’re all fine.” Raven deliberately kept her answer brief.
“Great, great. So how long you gon’ be in town. Maybe we could all go for a drink or somethin’.”
“No!” Raven answered. Then, as if realizing how abrupt that sounded she tried to clean it up. “I...I mean...”
“Maybe another time.” Once again, Hawk stepped in and came to her rescue. “We’re leaving tomorrow and already have plans for tonight. But it was good meeting you.” His tone made it clear that the conversation was over.
Surprise then anger flashed briefly on Benny’s face at the slight, but just as quickly, his lips pulled up into a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “You too, man. And maybe you can give some thought into hiring me permanently if you don’t mind? I could use the work.”
“I’ll talk to Ryan about it.”
“I appreciate that. Good seein’ you, Rae Rae. Now that I kinda know how to track you down I’m sure we’ll see each other again real soon.”
For some reason Benny’s words sounded more like a warning than just idle conversation. Giving them a brief wave, he turned to go back to work, looking over his shoulder at Raven once more before he rounded the corner.
Once he was gone, Raven’s body weight bowed against Hawk for a brief moment before she straightened and moved a
way.
“You okay?” He asked.
Her face turned expressionless as if an invisible door slammed shut. The distance present earlier returned. “I’m fine. Why do you ask?”
“Because you looked like you were ready to jump outta your skin when you saw that guy. You still do.”
Raven’s brows lifted as if she wasn’t sure what he meant. “I don’t know what you think you saw but I wasn’t upset. Just surprised.”
“Rae...”
Ryan chose that moment to walk back over to them. “Sorry about that. That was one of our suppliers. I needed to speak to him or I would’ve just called him back later.”
Half listening, Hawk kept his eyes riveted to Raven. She wanted him to think the fear he’d seen on her face was just his imagination, but he knew better. Hell, he could still feel the imprint on her body when she pressed against him as if using him as a shield against Thompson. Her pretending that wasn’t the case only made him more determined to find out what was really goin’ on with that guy.
Ryan glanced from one of them to the other when neither acknowledged his presence. “Am I interrupting something because if I am I can give you some privacy...”
Raven gave him an overly bright smile. “No. Not at all.”
It took Hawk a beat or two later to pull his attention away from Raven and swing it to Ryan. “I think we’re finished showing Raven around for now. Tell ya’ what, give me about thirty minutes then you and Mateo meet me in my office.”
“Will do,” Ryan answered. He gave Raven a quick smile as Hawk placed a hand on her back and guided them out of the restaurant.
Instead of getting back on the elevator, Hawk led her out an exit that opened up to a long hallway. When they got to a set of double doors, he took out his keys and unlocked the door to let them into his office. After turning the lights on, he closed the door and leaned back against it with folded arms.
Raven slowly walked in further, looking around the elegantly decorated office with eyebrows raised in surprise. “This is beautiful, Hawk. Very sleek and stylish.”
His eyes scanned the room, taking in the light grey walls and floor to ceiling windows that let natural light flow inside. Except for his desktop computer and brown leather notebook, his black and stainless steel desk was neat and uncluttered. Bookshelves lined the wall along with black and white pictures hung in silver frames. On the opposite side of the office sat a conference table, sofa and matching chairs.
But he didn’t want to talk about the décor of his office. Pushing away from the door, Hawk walked to the middle of the room to stand beside Raven. “Are you going to tell me what that was all about downstairs? I’m not crazy, Rae. I saw how uncomfortable you were around that dude. Did you and he used to date or somethin’?”
CHAPTER 22
“No!” Raven’s expression bordered on repugnance. “I barely know him.”
“Then what is it?”
“Nothing! I mean...it’s just that he represents a painful time in my life that I’d rather forget.”
“Why? Because of Jacoby?” Hawk knew about the violent manner in which she lost her only brother when she was a teenager. “Thompson said the two of them were friends?”
Staring at a point over his shoulder, Raven hesitated before answering. “They ran the streets together. I would hardly call them friends. Jacoby was so much better than Benny. I just wish he had realized that before he...” As if catching herself from going too far, she blinked away the past and brought Hawk back into focus. “It was a shock seeing him, that’s all. Brought back a lot of unpleasant memories that I’d rather had stayed buried.”
Hawk sensed she wasn’t telling him everything. He wanted to question her further, but the pain reflected in her eyes told him that her brother’s death still affected her deeply. It probably always would, which was something Hawk could relate to. He hadn’t lost his mother in a violent manner or anything, but he still missed her. Not a day went by that he didn’t wonder what his life would be like if she were still alive. He had a feeling the same thought plagued Raven about her brother.
Mistaking his silence to mean he was upset, Raven reached for his hand and threaded their fingers together. She looked up at him pleadingly through a sheen of bright tears that blurred her vision. “Please don’t be mad at me. I’m not trying to be deliberately secretive or anything, it’s just that...”
“I know. You don’t have to explain. I understand.” And he did. The pain of loss was something the two of them had in common. They both had unresolved hurts from their pasts and were seeking something that remained out of their grasps, taunting them with its elusiveness. Again, it was something he understood.
Hawk lifted his hand and wiped a tear away from her cheek with his thumb. “I’m not upset, okay?”
“I’m sorry.” Raven’s voice was thick with emotion.
“You don’t have to apologize, Rae.” He cupped her cheek with his hand and lowered his head so that he could look into her eyes. “Don’t ever apologize for the way you feel. I’m here for whatever you need. I’ll always protect you no matter what.”
Raven nuzzled into his hand and nodded. She lifted her lips in a gesture that was an unmistakable invitation. Hawk’s lips touched hers gently. The kiss started off as a way for him to soothe and reinforce the promise he just made, but when she moved closer and responded so sweetly he almost lost the little bit of control he had.
“Rae...” Her name whispered past his lips in warm caress. He deepened the kiss, wanting desperately to reassure her in a way she understood and banish her hurt away until she never felt another moment’s pain.
Raven’s arms circled his waist, pressing her body close as if to absorb his strength. The moment escalated like a smoldering flame doused with an accelerant. Fire licked at their bodies, devouring them with a heat so intense it threatened to burn them alive.
Hawk moved without even realizing it, walking her back to his desk and lifting her on top of it. Kneeing her thighs open, he slipped between them like a thief creeping in the darkness determined to escape with the goods. He palmed her ass in his hands, scooping her forward and attaching the most intimate part of her anatomy against the beast she’d succeeded in awakening.
Lifting his head he stared down into her face, his eyes probing and intense. “I don’t want us to play games anymore, Rae. We’re way past that. ”
Raven slowly nodded. “I agree. But–”
“No buts, Rae. Do you want to be with me or not?” Hawk heard the sharpness in his voice that reflected his impatience. Her lashes swept down as if dissecting his question, which only made him more anxious. Did it require that much thought? “Raven...”
“I thought you were going to give me a week?” Lifting her eyes, she watched him while waiting on his answer. “It’s only been a few days.”
Hawk’s muscles tensed. Fuck! Again, he asked himself why in the hell had he made ‘no sex’ one of the conditions! He honestly didn’t know how much more of this he could take, but dammit, he gave her his word. As painful as it would be for him to hold out, he had to do it.
He looked down and saw that his fingertips were digging into her thighs. Hawk forced himself to relax his grip. “You’re right. I’m not trying to rush you into a decision, so...” He stopped talking when he saw the corner of her mouth twitch. “Is something funny here? Because if it is, I missed the memo.”
The grin she struggled to keep contain burst through and took over her face “You’re right, it’s not funny. Just...”
Hawk’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Rae, please tell me you’re not fuckin’ with me right now because if you are the shit is not funny.”
“I’m sorry,” she squeezed out in between a giggle. “It’s just that your words are saying one thing but your expression is so damn threatening, Pattel.” She reached up and tried to smooth out his brow. “To answer your question, yes. I want to be with you. I don’t want to wait anymore, either.”
It took a second for he
r words to sink in, but when they did the tension slowly left his body like a deflated balloon. Shaking his head, a smile slowly formed on his lips until it matched hers. “You do know you’re gonna pay for that, right?”
Raven tilted her pelvis forward, grinding against his erection. “I’m looking forward to it.”
Hawk slipped a hand underneath her hair and stroked her neck with the tips of his fingers. Raven’s body entire body shivered from the light caress. The corner of Hawk’s mouth curved up at the corner when she arched against him. A groan rumbled from his chest as his lips hovered over hers. Their warm breaths mingled for several heart stopping moments before his lips locked over hers in a kiss that was hungry and passionate.
Hawk’s tongue navigated inside her mouth demanding full surrender, something Raven freely gave. His mind was a blur as everything else faded. She did that to him. Made him forget everything and everyone but her. His entire focus was Raven. Nothing mattered in that moment but loving her. Pleasuring her. Fucking her.
Whispering her name, Hawk’s lips travelled down to her neck, exploring the area right where it curved to her shoulder. He knew what she liked. The vulnerable spot got her hot every time, took her level of arousal up a notch. This time was no exception. He ran his hand through her hair as his teeth grazed along her skin. Raven writhed against him, pulling him closer until there was no space left between their bodies. Her words came out disjointed but Hawk got the gist of her meaning: she didn’t want him to stop. Wanting, needing more, Raven’s hand squeezed in between them and covered the bulge in his pants.
Hawk’s heart rate accelerated. His senses were so dulled by his desire for her that it took longer than it should have to realize that the door to his office opened. When it finally penetrated his lust filled brain, he turned his head and saw Ryan and Mateo entering. The two men were engaged in conversation and didn’t readily notice the heated predicament Hawk and Raven found themselves in until they were several steps inside the office. They both stopped at the same time and stared with wide eyes and mouths agape before apologies came flying out.