“And now?”
“Since I’ve been away from the day-to-day grind of my job, I realized that I was busy, but maybe not as important as I thought I was. When I’m endlessly sorting books at the bookstore, I miss the intellectual aspect of what I used to do. The technology is fascinating, but now I’m in management. Or I was before they fired me anyway. You know how I am with people. I should never have taken the promotion, but in that environment, you can’t just say no to an opportunity like that. Here, I’ve had a lot of time to think. I love my house and my job, but something has always been missing.”
“What?”
“I’m not sure. I’m wondering if I’ve just been waiting to be happy, expecting it to show up like some magic genie because that’s what happened before with the scholarship and my job. I never had to go out and get those things. They just came to me. All I had to do was just follow along.”
“It sounds like you worked hard.”
“I suppose I did. But I treated it like an equation. If I do X, then Y will happen. But now I have no idea what to do. I have no X.” She turned her palms toward the ceiling. “Well, beyond finding a job. But doing what? My experience is so specialized, I can’t just look in the newspaper. I’ll probably have to move, but I don’t want to leave Tucson. I like it there.”
He smiled. “Well, it is warm out there in the desert.”
“Yes, and sunny! And now I’ve met a bunch of classmates who seem really happy doing things I never would have expected. I thought I had to go to college, get a good job, and then everything would be perfect. But it’s not. Other people made different choices and seem so happy. I mean, Vanessa teaches aerobics! And Carl…Carla? I never would have imagined that.”
“Yeah, she’s staying here at The Moose. We had a long conversation earlier. She’s a heck of a lot nicer than she used to be.”
“I know! She actually thanked me and apologized. I couldn’t believe it.”
Drew gestured toward the window. “Okay. But wait, you didn’t say anything about the guy. You’ve been seeing the same person for six years? Are you living together?”
“No. His house is on the other side of Tucson. He’s a professor at the university.”
“Interesting.”
Beth knew that when Drew said ‘interesting’ it never meant that he thought something was actually interesting. He just wasn’t saying what he really thought. “No it’s not interesting. What are you really thinking?”
“Nothing. I’m just happy for y’all. It’s probably nice to have a long-term thing like that.” He stroked the fur on Dixie’s back. “I wouldn’t know. I can barely handle an eight-pound puppy.”
“And now here I am babbling away, dumping all my ruminations on you, just like I always did.” She squeezed his arm. “I don’t know why, but I can tell you things I just can’t say to other people—even my mom.”
“That’s ‘cuz you know I’ll do something stupid like suggest we sneak off to Los Angeles and go see the Dead at the Coliseum or go skinny-dipping at Gray’s Point.”
“Maybe.” Beth giggled. “But that was fun. And after the raccoon ran off with your shorts—well, I don’t think I’ve ever laughed that hard.”
“I don’t think the lower half of me has ever been that cold.”
Beth nudged him. “And then when the little raccoon stood up on his hind legs and grabbed your briefs off that shrub. I thought I was going to die of laughter. It was like he was mocking you.”
“Nasty varmints.”
Beth looked into his face. “I confess, I really didn’t think you’d want to come back here.”
“I didn’t. But I had a question I needed to get answered and some stuff to do. So I decided at the last minute to come.” He pointed toward the pile of papers and clothes on the bed. “I threw a bunch of stuff in the rig and hit the road. One thing Alpine Grove has going for it is quiet. Like you said, this is a good place to think. I figured I could make an appearance at the reunion and get those cheerleaders to stop harassing me. I don’t know how they got my number.”
“You certainly are an eclectic packer. Are you still doing those wonderful pencil sketches? I still have the one you did of me sitting on that huge rock at the lake. It’s hanging on my wall at home. I got it framed.”
“No.” He shrugged “I don’t do that much anymore.”
“Didn’t you study art?”
He shook his head.
“So what have you done over the last ten years?”
“Did some time at UNC. I was on the slow-boat six-year, off-and-on collegiate program.” He grinned at her. “Go Tarheels! Then I traveled a lot too. You know my Dad used to buy and sell properties. After he sold the marina here, he was moving on to some other ‘big thing.’ I don’t even remember what the deal was anymore. But he had a heart attack and he wanted me to take over the business so he could slow down. I said no. I was about to take off on a trip and there was no way I wanted to settle down and become Mr. Real Estate Mogul.”
“That doesn’t really sound like your style.”
“No kidding. But then he had another heart attack and died.”
“Oh Drew, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”
“It’s okay.” He shrugged. “Really, Dad always predicted it. He always said he was going to keel over from a massive coronary. Unfortunately, he was right. All that working finally caught up with him.”
“So did you take over the business like he wanted?”
“Nope. I sold it. His partners were desperate for it. I said they could have it. So I took the money and ran.”
“Ran where?”
“Everywhere. I wanted to travel. So I did. Criss-crossed the States. Went to India, Europe—a bunch of places.”
“Wow. I can’t imagine doing that much traveling. I can imagine you doing it, though.”
“Yeah, I kinda just wanted to get away.”
Dixie stood up and stretched deeply, making a little squeaky yawning noise. Drew scooped her up in his arms and stood up. “Okay, little one. We know where you need to go now.”
Beth stood up next to him. “Outside?”
“You better believe it, baby. This animal has a bladder the size of a blueberry.”
Glancing at the clock on the nightstand, Beth discovered it was a lot later than she thought. “I should probably be going. My mother will be concerned. I told her I’d only be here for a little while and she tends to worry.”
He grinned at her. “Talk about a flashback. How many times have I heard you say, ‘My mom is going to kill me’?”
Beth put on her coat. “I know. You’d think by now it wouldn’t be an issue. But I know she’s going to give me her patented ‘I was worried’ glare when I walk in the door. The statute of limitations for maternal worry doesn’t ever seem to run out.”
“Hold onto sleepyhead while I put on my coat. I’ll walk you to your car.”
Beth collected the lethargic puppy in her arms. “Drew, you don’t have to do that. I know the way.”
“My great-granddaddy would roll over in his grave if he knew I let a woman walk alone. The gentlemanly code of the South has a few standards left. Maybe not many, but a few.”
Beth rolled her eyes. “Oh brother. You and your great-grandfather. Someday you’ll have to show me a picture of this illustrious fellow.”
They walked back outside, where Dixie enjoyed some more darting, cavorting, and relieving herself. Beth took Drew’s arm again and let out a deep breath as an overwhelming sense of relief washed over her. He didn’t seem to hate her, after all.
For ten years, she’d avoided any contact with Drew, desperately afraid to hear what he might say to her. She certainly would have deserved his wrath. But it was like no time had passed and she had never said all those horrible things to him. She didn’t know how or why he had forgiven her, but it didn’t matter. Maybe she hadn’t lost the best friend she’d ever had, after all.
Beth stood next to her Explorer and bent to disentangle Dixie’s
leash from her ankles “She’s quite a speedy little thing.”
“Yeah. I keep worrying I’m gonna step on her.”
Beth stood up. “I didn’t ask you before. How long are you staying in Alpine Grove?”
“I’m not sure. Like I said, I’ve got some stuff to do.”
“My mother’s birthday is next weekend and Bea Sullivan is throwing a big party. I know my mom would love to see you.”
Drew looked into her eyes. “Would you?”
“Yes.” She leaned forward and put her arms around him. “I just can’t believe you don’t despise me. I’ve relived what I said in my mind a thousand times.”
He hugged her quickly and let go. “I could never do that, Bethie.”
Beth leaned back to look up into his eyes. “I’m so sorry I called you lazy. I didn’t mean it.”
“I believe you said I was ‘a lazy, puerile underachiever’ who would never amount to anything.” He smiled. “After I got home, I looked up puerile.”
“I should never have said that. I was just so upset at leaving you and my mom and everything that was familiar. I was terrified, and I lashed out at everybody. My mom has forgiven me for the things I said to her.” Beth shook her head and looked down. “She said it takes two to tango.”
“That sounds like something she’d say.”
“I know. She also said that making amends and admitting her own wrongdoing is part of the AA steps. I don’t know, but it sounds like the steps go on indefinitely.”
“I think so.” Drew bent to pick up Dixie. He tucked the dog next to him and wrapped his coat over her body, hugging her with one arm. “I think she’s getting cold.”
“Okay.” Even though she was freezing, Beth didn’t want to leave. “I would like to see you again. Will you come to the party?”
“We’ll see.” He grinned and waved expansively at the parking lot with his free hand. “In the meantime, I’ll be enjoying the ambiance of The Moose.”
Beth giggled. “It’s so good to see you again, Drew.”
“You too, Beth. Drive safely.”
As Beth drove back to her mother’s house, she couldn’t stop smiling. Seeing Drew again had been so much fun. What a wonderful conversation! She went over everything they’d talked about in her mind. He had this way of listening with total attention, but he hadn’t really said much. Although she knew he went to the University of North Carolina, he didn’t say what he studied. Or what he was doing now. Or where he lived. Hmm.
She walked into the living room, where her mother was watching TV. Margaret only watched TV when she was too tired to read. She sat up and glared at Beth. “I assume they do still have telephone service at the Enchanted Moose.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t call, Mom.”
“I thought you were only going to stay for a half an hour? ‘Make an appearance and go,’ I believe you said. Did you have car trouble? Did something happen that caused you to be incapable of picking up a phone?”
“No. I lost track of time.” Beth smiled, unable to hide her enthusiasm. “I’m so happy you encouraged me to go!”
Margaret raised her eyebrows. “Really?”
“Yes. I saw Drew Emery.”
“I thought you didn’t want to see him.”
“I didn’t. But Mom, he doesn’t hate me. He was so sweet and funny. And he has a little puppy named Dixie. She is so cute.”
Margaret smiled. “It’s wonderful to see you so happy, dear. I’m glad you had a good time after all.”
“Oh, and I invited Drew to your birthday party. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course, dear. It will be nice to see him again.”
“I’m going to bed. At least I don’t have to work at the store tomorrow. I’m going to celebrate by sleeping late.”
“Okay. I won’t disturb you. I know you’re not in high school, Beth, but if you stay out late, please call me.”
Beth walked over to her mother and bent down to give her a hug. “I will. I promise.”
After a gloriously relaxing day lounging around with her mother reading novels, Beth returned to the store on Monday. The boxes were still there. She’d barely made a dent in the towering masses of them in the back room. It was discouraging.
She grabbed a box and dragged it out next to the desk to begin sorting. Beth was distracted by the pen-and-ink illustrations in an antique copy of Alice in Wonderland when the bells on the door jingled. She looked up and grinned when she saw Jill, her mother’s best friend and AA sponsor.
“Aunt Jill! I’m so glad to see you.” Jumping up from the desk, she ran toward the front of the store and hugged the older woman. “I was hoping you’d stop by!”
Jill had worked at the Alpine Grove library for as long as Beth could remember. She always wore her gray hair in a long braid that stretched down to the middle of her back. She pushed an errant gray strand back behind her ear and looked around the store. “It looks like you remembered what to do. Your mom tells me you’re doing a great job.”
“I don’t know about that.” Beth pointed at the box. “It’s a good thing she can’t see how little progress I’ve made on the book-sorting project. How many auctions has she been to?”
“I lost count. Margaret likes the buying part, but not the sorting part. She said she’s a little behind.”
“No kidding. So how are things at the library?”
“Same old stuff. Except I have to do more things on the computer, which I don’t like. But I keep handing off all the online research to Jan. It works out, since she loves that stuff. I figure she can have it.”
Beth recalled Jill’s long-standing animosity toward computers. They never talked about RTP or what Beth did for a living. “It sounds like Jan is working out well then, after all?”
“Jan is the most amazing librarian I’ve ever met. She drives me insane sometimes, but she’s great. To be fair, she’s mellowed out a little since she started seeing that guy.”
“What guy?” Finding a man worth dating in Alpine Grove wasn’t easy.
“Michael Lawson. He owns the new ad agency.”
“You mean the one in the old Frederickson’s building?”
“Yup. He’s gorgeous. I may be old, but I’m not dead. It’s some nice viewing when he stops by the library to see her. I try not to drool on the desk.”
Beth laughed. “Well good for her. I guess that means he has all his teeth, too.”
“You better believe it. She met him in San Diego and he’s quite beautiful.” Jill flipped her braid back over her shoulder. “I need to talk to you about something.”
Beth sat back down at the desk. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, don’t worry. But I want to give your mom a present for her birthday. It’s a big birthday, but it’s also her 20-year anniversary of being sober.”
“Wow. She’s getting the 20-year chip?”
“Yes. Obviously not at the party, but at the meeting next week. I want to do something really special, but I need your help. Margaret hasn’t taken a vacation in a long time. Ever since Evelyn left town a few years ago, she just hasn’t found anyone reliable to take care of the store. Jan found this cruise on some close-out travel web site. It’s so cheap, it’s almost criminal not to buy it. Mexico! Your mom would flip for it. Jan took a lot of time off a few months ago, and I’ve saved my pennies, so now it’s my turn.”
“That’s incredibly generous and you both would have so much fun. Do you want me to pitch in? I’d be happy to.”
“That’s kind of you, but what I’d really like is for you to watch the store for a little while.” Jill paused. “Your mom told me you’re in-between jobs.”
“Yes. That’s a nice way of putting it. When is the cruise?”
“You’d need to be available March second through the sixteenth.”
“Two weeks?”
“Well the cruise itself is ten days, but we have to get down and back to LA, so you’d probably have to be here for two weeks. I know it’s a lot to ask.”
“Would you?”
“Yes. I will.” Beth nodded vigorously. “You’re right. This is a really big deal, and Mom hasn’t taken a vacation in a long time.”
Jill leaned over and wrapped Beth in a hug. “Oh thank you, Beth! I’ll tell Jan to press the button and buy the tickets. Then we can give your mom a great surprise at the party. She’s going to be so excited!”
“Well, Mom made so many sacrifices for me after Dad left.” Beth looked down at the desk. “It’s the least I can do.”
“Oh Beth, you need to let all that go. You father is a good person. Leaving was for the best.”
Beth crossed her arms. “Mom always says that, but I don’t see how abandoning your family is ever a good idea.”
“You probably don’t remember because you were just a little girl, but your parents were awful together. Your mom wouldn’t admit to having a problem. Your father nagged her about rehab and it all got very nasty.”
“They could have worked it out. People do all the time!”
“Not in this case, Beth. Margaret wouldn’t commit to her sobriety until he left. He wanted you to have a good life. Your mom needed to be away from him to get herself together to take care of you.”
Beth waved at the front windows. “Easy for him. All he had to do was cough up some money for the house and child support, and voila, he’s rid of the weird shy kid.”
“Beth, you’ve tortured yourself over this for years and it was a lot more complicated than that. He made sure that no matter what happened with your mom, you’d be cared for, but he had to earn money too.” Jill shook her head. “He wasn’t trying to get away from you. You refused to visit. If you say no multiple times, eventually people stop asking. Has he ever not called you on your birthday?”
“No. He always calls.”
“Maybe you should think about talking to someone. It might help you work some of this old stuff out. You’ll be happier if you do. I promise.”
Bark to the Future (An Alpine Grove Romantic Comedy Book 5) Page 8