by Alexa Davis
“Well, you do, boss.”
I spun around to look at my friend and bouncer, Braxton, giving me a wide-mouthed smile. I knew what that meant – he thought I was the only one who had the world at my feet. What he didn’t seem to realize was that by working for me, the whole world was his oyster, too. I extended what I had to guys who deserved it, and he was one of the best.
“Braxton.” I threw my arm over his shoulder, which wasn’t easy since he was built like a brick shit house with at least 300 pounds behind him. “Look at this: we’re on a yacht, cruising the ocean in the bright hot sunshine, beers in hand, with women as far as the eye can see. How many jobs would allow you to have this much fun?”
“You’re right, Terrance, don’t think I’m not grateful. It’s just...” I stepped back to stare at him as his eyes fell to the ground. There was something going on in that big beautiful mind of his, and I needed to know what. “You have it all; you’re a good-looking bloke with killer green eyes, height that any guy would want. All the women are throwing themselves at you.”
“Mostly because of my money.” I shrugged wryly, wanting to at least seem modest. “If I was skint, none of these broads would even give me a second look.”
“Oh, I highly doubt that. I’m the one no one looks at because... Well, look at me.”
“Dude, you have an incredible big ass. It’s confidence you lack.” I waved my arms in front of myself as I spoke. “You just need to know what to say!”
Braxton fell into silence. I could tell that he was drinking all of that in, so to give him a moment alone with his thoughts, I sucked back the beer I had in my hands and scanned the crowd of beauties. I didn’t know any of them, really – I had a guy who got gorgeous women to attend my parties on the day I needed some company – but I already knew that every single one of them would be happy to spend some one-on-one time with me.
That was the power that came with the Canton name. I was famous for my cash and, if I was honest with myself, my striking looks, which was why every single one of them was giving me a seductive look back.
They all wanted me – it was just up to me to take my pick.
“I guess,” Braxton started speaking out again, grabbing my attention back to him, “I want more than just a hook up. What I really want is someone to spend the rest of my life with.” He stared intently at me, his dark brown eyes shining with questions. “Don’t you ever feel like that? Don’t you ever want a little bit more?”
“What, like, I want a wife?” I scoffed like the idea was totally ridiculous, which was exactly how I felt about that topic. “Come on, you know me. I don’t want to be tied down to anyone. I’m only thirty three years old. I have all these women wanting me; why would I want to settle with just the one.”
“But... No, it doesn’t matter.” Braxton’s eyes looked everywhere but me. He had something else to say, but it seemed I was going to have to coax it out of him.
“No, go on, please tell me what you’re thinking. You know how much I value your opinion. You’re my closest friend, I hope you realize that.”
Was it sad to be so close to one of my employees? Then again, did I really care? Braxton was an awesome bloke; that was all I cared about.
“Well, it seems to be more than just about that...to me. I think the reason you don’t want to settle down is more than just the women.”
I sighed deeply and stared up at the cloudless sky, needing just a moment to compose myself. It was a good thing Braxton was my friend, but sometimes it made it very challenging to keep up the upbeat, happy version of myself when he could see into the depths of my soul. “Yes, I suppose you’re right.”
“I thought so. Is this to do with Mason?”
Urgh, Mason. My wonderful brother. Okay, so maybe he was a little wild at times, he didn’t always behave in the way that I wanted him to, but he did not deserve what happened to him. It fucked me up over and over again to think about it.
“Yes, I guess so. It just messes me up that the murder still remains unsolved. I put a lot of money into my own investigations and still, nothing has come out of it.” My eyes slid closed for a second, and I could clearly see the image of his ice cold dead beaten and bruised body, as if it only happened yesterday, rather than three whole years ago. I didn’t think I’d ever be able to recover from that.
“I’m sorry, boss. I’m sure you’ll get your answers in the end-”
“And then there’s losing my father, that still hurts,” I interrupted without really meaning to. “I know it was five years ago, but that heart attack came from nowhere and I’m still pretty messed up about it.”
I hadn’t expected to get so deep on this wonderful day, but I did feel a little weight left from my chest. Talking about my issues sucked and felt wonderful all at once. “I don’t want to settle down and end up bringing another life into this fucked up world. It just isn’t right.”
A thick pregnant pause filled the air. Braxton didn’t know what to say to me, and I had nothing left, either. It’d happened, it was horrible, but I had to remember that I was still alive. Sometimes I got so lost in all my thoughts that I completely forgot about that. I was here – it was my duty to live because they didn’t get to.
It was time to change the subject.
“Okay, Braxton, you want some tips on speaking to the ladies? Here it is.”
I could hear him protesting beside me, but I paid absolutely no attention. I leaned forwards onto my knees and indicated to the two nearest women to come over. One of them had long blonde hair cascading down her back and a tiny red bikini that left nothing to the imagination, the other one had a black flowing top over her swimwear, which only served to highlight her impossibly long legs, and a very adorable Mediterranean look about her. “Right, Braxton, take notes.”
“Hey,” blondie purred. “How are you today, Terrance?” Of course, I didn’t have to introduce myself, I never did. Any self respecting gold digger would’ve seen my pictures in all the society pages.
“I’m good, and how are you two?” I smirked at winked.
They glanced at each other and giggled, enjoying my focus. “Yeah, we’re fine. I’m Sandi by the way, and this is my friend, Maria.”
I shook both of their hands far too slowly, maintaining intense eye contact with each woman as I did. Neither of them minded me taking time with the other girl, as long as they could glean some of my attention. “So, are you enjoying the party? It’s fun, isn’t it?”
“Oh, it’s amazing; thank you so much for inviting us. This is wonderful.”
“All the more wonderful for having you two to look at.”
I glanced towards Braxton, trying to get him to say something. He’d seen me complimentary and flirtatious with my body, he could at least try to emulate that. There was no reason to be nervous – these were practice women.
“So, what do you girls do for a living?”
It took all I had not to throw my head into my hands. Blondie began to ramble on about her beauty salon, chatting excitedly about make up and hair products in a very boring way. This was such a mistake. Learning more about the women left them open to ask questions, too, and I wanted to remain a mystery. I didn’t want anyone to know anything about me. It was all supposed to be physical, a moment of carnal fun.
“Right, girls,” I finally felt compelled to interject. “We need to have a chat, so do you mind going back to the bar for some drinks? I will come over and grab you in a bit.”
Blondie looked put out, but her friend didn’t seem to care. I liked that attitude, it was quite nice.
“What did you just do?” Braxton exclaimed as the girls left. “That was going so well, she was actually talking to me.”
“She was talking at you, and you asked her too many questions.”
“I asked her one.” His expression of utter bewilderment make me chuckle. He really didn’t get it, did he?
“One is too many. You don’t want to find out too much about her before you hook up.”
&
nbsp; “Why not?”
I leant back and smiled at my friend. “I have so much to teach you. You need to come to the Lights Out Club at the weekend. I can show you more then. The VIP section is filled with women desperate for some fun.”
His lips curled up, and his eyebrows furrowed. “This weekend? Actually, I was going to ask you if you minded me taking off this weekend. It’s my sister’s kids’ christening and I promised I’d be there. I did ask you a while back...”
“Of course, you did, don’t worry about it. I vaguely remember you asking me now, and you do deserve some time off. You go and have fun. I will show you how to get with the ladies the weekend after.”
Maria was still giving me a look, one that was clawing at my chest. She seemed just like me: unwilling to share personal details, up for some serious fun, plus she was absolutely gorgeous. I was going to have to wrap this up so I could take her below deck.
“Thanks, boss, I really appreciate it.” Braxton gave me a very grateful grin. “And the weekend after, I’ll do whatever the hell you want me to.”
I stood up and clapped him happily on the back before stretching my arms up to allow my tee shirt to rise. I worked hard for my body, so I liked to show it off at every available opportunity. If there wasn’t such a strong breeze, I would’ve had it off already. “Right, buddy, I’m going to go and give Maria a tour of the boat, if you know what I mean?” I winked at him, and he laughed. “I’ll see you in a while, okay?”
I didn’t even need to talk to Maria, I just raised my eyebrows at her and she was by my side in a heartbeat. I flung my arm over her shoulder, protectively claiming her as my own, just for a moment. She swung her hips as she walked, but kept her lips firmly squeezed shut. She was my kind of woman: quiet, sexy, and up for a good time.
I indicated towards the stairs and watched her walk in front of me, a stirring occurring in my pants. This really was the life, I had it totally made. Why the hell would I want to settle down? In fact, why would I want to change anything about my life when it was so perfect? It was absolute insanity.
I had a life that others were jealous of, why would I want to even think about anything more?
Chapter Two
Morgan
Thursday
Exhaustion clouded my eyes as I practically staggered into the break room for a much needed cup of coffee. When I went to medical school to become a nurse, I never realized how reliant on caffeine I would become. I took that path in life because I wanted to help people, not because I wanted to spend my entire life yawning and rubbing my eyes.
“Oh, hey, how’s it going, Morgan?”
I blanched as I caught sight of my best friend Nickie sprawled across the chairs as if she was in her own home. How was it fair that we did exactly the same job, but she always looked like she had stepped off a catwalk, or at least from the pages of a magazine? Her blonde hair was braided in a very neat style, her brown eyes sparkled as if she’d just had a long night of rest, and her pale skin looked totally unblemished by the day.
I, on the other hand, had my dark hair screwed up into a bun, my dark blue eyes definitely had no sparkle to them, and I knew for sure that I had a pimple brewing under the surface.
“Yeah, wonderful,” I muttered, my temper shining through. “What’cha reading there?” If there was one thing I loved, it was a good book. I always had my head buried in one, transporting myself to wonderful other worlds.
I flicked the coffee machine on and threw my hands onto my hips before smiling at my friend. It wasn’t her fault that I was such a mess and she wasn’t.
“The book you leant me, the one about the hapless rich guy falling for the tempting vixen before realizing that his best friend was the love of his life all along.”
“What? You only look about halfway through. How do you know that?”
“Oh come on, it’s obvious. I’m still loving it, though.” She swung her legs around until they hit the floor. “Are you alright? You look a bit tired.” That was putting it mildly! I thought. “Are you excited for the weekend?”
“So much!” I grabbed my paper cup and sat down next to her. “I’ll be sleeping from Friday night until Monday morning. Then maybe next week, I can make it to Thursday without looking like death.”
Nickie glared at me as if I’d said the worst thing in the world. “Are you serious? But you promised you would come out with me. I want to go to Lights Out – it looks amazing.”
“Oh no, did I really?” I threw my head back in despair. “Do I have to? I need so much sleep, you don’t understand.”
As Nickie stared at me, I got the horrible sense that I wasn’t going to be able to get out of it. She had this way of always making me do what she wanted; ever since I first met her in medical school, she had coerced me into many nights out, and I had a feeling this was going to be exactly the same.
“I’ll think about it,” I finally nodded at her, hoping that it would put her off hassling me for now. “I’ll see how tomorrow goes, then I’ll make a decision.”
“Okay sure, but you’ll come out to dinner with me after work, won’t you? I can not be bothered to cook tonight.”
“No, me neither.” Eating out was my one guilty pleasure. I did it way too often, but to be fair, I did work long hours. I just didn’t have time to slave over the oven every night, which was a damn shame because the one hobby I really adored was cooking and baking. “Yeah let’s do it.” I glanced at my watch and rose to my feet. “Right, I better get back. I’ll see you at the end of the day, okay?”
“Love you, Morgan!” Nickie called out sweetly. “See you in a bit!”
***
I tossed a sweater on over my scrubs and grabbed my backpack as relief flooded me. It had been a long day, with a lot of terrible things happening in the hospital. I just needed to get out before my workplace swallowed my whole.
“Come on, Morgan, let’s get going!” Nickie tugged on my arm excitedly. “I have a real hankering for some chicken.”
“Sure, sure, whatever you want.” I simply allowed her to pull me along with her towards wherever the hell she was going. I honestly didn’t care. I just needed something to satiate my growling stomach. “Take me anywhere with food.”
I wasn’t exactly surprised when we ended up at the diner at the end of the road. It was easy, convenient, cheap, to be honest, most of the medical staff ended up going there after a long day. When I looked around I recognized most of the faces in the room. I couldn’t recall a lot of their names, but I knew which floor and department they worked in.
After we ordered, Nickie cocked her head at me and gave me a curious look. “Are you ignoring your phone for a reason?”
“Oh shit, is it ringing?” I scrabbled around in my bag until I found it, but when I saw the name across the screen, I screwed up my nose and hit the decline button. “Oh, it doesn’t matter. Not someone I want to speak to.”
“Your mom?” Nickie knew me all too well.
“Yep, and she’s on another ‘I need a grandchild’ phase, which I am not in the mood to deal with right now.” I rolled my eyes in an exaggerated manner, trying to make light of a situation that in reality, felt very shitty. “I cannot deal.”
“Does she not realize that you’re only twenty six years old and don’t even have a serious boyfriend...or any boyfriend, for that matter?”
“Thanks for that stark reminder.” Okay, so maybe I’d pushed my love life to one side for the time being, but that was only because the right man hadn’t come along. I was a modern woman who was willing to wait until the right man came along...or at least until I wasn’t so exhausted. Whatever. “But no, she doesn’t seem to understand that. She was never a career woman, so she just doesn’t get it. It’s easier to ignore her, if I’m honest.”
“Yeah, my mom makes me crazy, too; that’s why I never bother going home.”
The waitress brought our food over to the table, and we both stuffed our faces like we’d been starved, but the conversation hadn’t bee
n dropped. It was circling through my mind, and I could tell that it was running through Nicki’s, too.
“I mean, it would be nice to meet someone awesome.” She shrugged her shoulders and smirked. “Ben was alright, but he had no fire. What we had in bed wasn’t anything, it just didn’t grind my gears. Not like Antonio... Wow, he was incredible. It was just a shame that he had to put it about with everyone else, too.”
I nodded along like I understood, but really I had no clue. In reality, I’d never had that all consuming passion that sent me crazy. I’d liked guys well enough, I’d been attracted to men, but there was nothing that made me want to tear my clothes off. I never felt like if I didn’t have someone, I would die. I knew that I was missing out on something fundamental in my life, and it really sucked, but I couldn’t create it. Passion was just one of those things – it came from biology. If I hadn’t experienced it, then maybe I was just one of those women who would never get to have that.
“Anyway, it doesn’t matter. Maybe we’ll both meet someone awesome at Lights Out tomorrow night.”
“Yeah, maybe...” Yep, there was no escape. What a freaking nightmare. I really didn’t want to mash my body through throngs of sweating bodies on my night off, but as usual, Nickie would get her way. “We’ll see.”
“Oh come on, Morgan, you’ll love it. You spend too much of your time inside, you’re getting too old for your age,” she whined pitifully. “I meant what I said about you only being twenty six years old. You’re too young to sleep the weekend away, you need to have some fun.”
“I’ve said we’ll see, let’s just leave it at that, okay?”
***
By the time I got home an hour or so later, the exhaustion was almost all consuming. It was a struggle to even keep my eyes open, but that didn’t stop me from seeing the damn state of the place. One of the jobs I always tried to leave myself was cleaning, but I never quite got around it. If only I had more hours in the day.