But now, on the morning after becoming an official couple, I found myself a panic-stricken mess. And it was all the fault of the man lying beside me.
Stupid, “adorkable,” perfect Liam. I sighed. He really was perfect. Too perfect. I rolled over to admire him as he slept. His hair was standing up in small spikes from bedhead. My fingers ached to dig into his golden locks and make it worse with some early morning fun, which would not be the mature thing to do, so instead, I redirected my gaze to the overnight stubble growth. Liam was always clean-shaven, so it was odd to see him look so disheveled. His normal businessman look had been replaced by a rugged beefcake. Yes, I said beefcake. Sue me.
While his build may not be the poster boy for Men’s Health, Liam was no wet noodle either. He was lean but strong; being a runner made his muscles defined but not grotesque. Unlike myself, who was thin-ish but soft in places I wished I weren’t.
I watched with a contented grin as his scarred and delightfully naked torso rose and fell as he slept. I noticed his alarm had been set, probably for his morning jog since he was still off for a few days, which meant he’d be waking up any moment now. I made a concerted effort to drink him in again. Why was he so pretty?
Was it really only yesterday that Liam told me he’d wanted to be my boyfriend? Not just a guy who wanted to be my friend, but the whole deal. Me. He said he wanted me. A pathetic, walking disaster with no aspirations of bettering my lot in life. How could he want that? Logically, our pairing made no sense. He was a demi-god in the looks department, and I was one of the puny humans groveling at his feet. And yet, his hands. His lips… They made me feel like I was the one being worshiped. I’d never felt that with any of the other guys I’d dated. Nowhere even close to that desired.
I cuddled up to him, feeling his warmth against me, knowing this thing of ours wouldn’t last forever. He was quite literally too good to be true, and those things never lasted. He’d likely grow tired of my ridiculousness or realize how hopeless I was with money, or, more realistically, he’d find a woman better suited for him. Someone like Angel… The woman I’d been prepping him to date when this whole blurred-line relationship of ours began. He had needed kissing practice before his date with her because the boy was beyond rusty. He was a near master now, thanks to my diligent training. In fact, he was too good.
There were very few lines in our “practice” sessions that we hadn’t crossed—full penetration being the hard stop for both of us. I wouldn’t take that from him. It was a gift he was saving for his wife. I might be a fuckup, but that is one rule I wouldn’t break. I would not steal that from the woman he would end up with, even though it was heartbreaking to know that would not be my gift to receive. Tears welled when I thought about the day he’d finally see the light of day and send me packing.
“What are you so deep in thought about?” Liam asked suddenly beside me. His voice was husky from sleep. He rolled over to reach out to cuddle, but the tears were still leaking. I flung myself out of bed before he could see them fall. One sure way to get a man to leave? Expose how crazy your mind really worked. Better to keep these fears locked up tight.
“Chloe. What’s wrong?” Liam sat up. The frown lines etched in his brow made my heart hurt.
“Nothing,” I said quickly, needing to change the subject. “I— It’s just… Morning breath,” I blurted, thinking on the fly, quickly swatting away the tears.
My made-up confession made him smile. “I’m not sure mine is much better.” He cupped a hand over his mouth to test his hypothesis and made a face.
I laughed, despite my earlier fears. He could always do that: make the fear disappear. “Yeah, but don’t forget I also stink from fried grossness from my shift. I need to go hose myself down. I’m making myself gag.” Kneeling, I grabbed my work pants from last night off the floor. When I stood back up, Liam was there. His arms slid around me, holding me dangerously close.
“Chloe, I want you just the way you are. Nasty morning breath, fry grease stench, and all.” He nestled his face against my neck and pulled me in for a warm embrace. “Mmm, you know what? On second thought... I think I’m pretty dirty, too. Maybe I should join you in the shower?”
My body came alive with his words; that was dangerous. Realistically, I had already given myself over to desire the moment I woke up. I craved Liam in a way I had never experienced before with any other man. He was addictive. One word, one look, and I was ready and willing to do his bidding. Talk about terrifying.
When his hand slipped under my shirt and slowly traced his way to the curve of my left breast, I actually gasped.
“Am I being too forward?” he asked quietly.
Say yes, Chloe. Take a breather from him. Get some distance before you screw up another relationship.
“God, no,” I said, effectively shutting my inner monologue off. There would be lots of time for distance later when he let me go. For now, I wanted to take any chance I could to play with him.
With hungry hands, he lifted my tee over my head, leaving me fully exposed. I had not worn my undies to bed because I hate sleeping with my clothes on. I’d left my longer tee on, however, out of respect to him. This lack of undergarments seemed to be much to his delighted surprise.
“Usually, the bush is a tad more maintained than this,” I apologized, but he didn’t seem deterred by a few stray hairs. He made a low, almost growling sound in the back of his throat. One of primal need. The noise seemed to shock him but turned me on.
“Sorry,” he said. “You just do things to me…”
I smirked, looking downward. “So I see.”
Instinctively, he blushed and moved his hands to cover his erection. He was still so very naive about his own sexuality that even his own hard-ons embarrassed him. Part of me felt guilty for that. I’d awakened his natural urges with all our practice make-out sessions. I had engaged his wild oats and they demanded to be sowed. At first, he was mortified when his body reacted to something as innocent as a kiss. Looking back to that time I realized those kisses had been anything but innocent. I’d gotten way more aroused than a best friend had any right to be. During those practice sessions, we’d draw a line, and break it, over and over.
Liam shifted uncomfortably in the thin layer of cotton pajama bottoms that separated us, clearly not sure if he’d crossed another line. He so hadn’t.
“You know what will fix that?” I said, nodding toward his cock. “Warm water and a massage.”
Liam swallowed as I took his hand and led him to the shower.
In the bathroom, I kept my eyes off Liam and tried to focus on the task of starting the shower. It was far more difficult than it should have been being as turned on as I was. I wanted to take him right where he stood. I knew, however, that the warmth of the shower would kick things up a notch for him, and his need was all I cared about. I wouldn’t rob him of his virginity, but I sure as hell could ride the edge of his morals as close as I could possibly go.
Outstretching an arm into the shower to check for water temperature, I heard Liam stepping out of his pajamas behind me. I longed to turn around and witness him in all his glory, but I resisted, willing the water to warm faster. A moment later, I felt his excitement behind me, pressing against the curve of my ass. I literally shivered as my nipples pebbled against the sensation.
He brushed my hair aside and kissed the nape of my neck slowly. A soft moan escaped me. His hands traced down both of my arms, suddenly making me forget all about the shower. One hand reached around to cradle my breast while the other hand dug deep into my hip as he pulled me harder against him. My mouth watered with desire.
“Chloe…” His voice was raw. Pained. I knew what he wanted. What his instinct was begging him to do, but I couldn’t let him go there. Not with me. I wouldn’t let him compromise his morals because his hormones took over. What I could do, however, was give him the release he needed. It was the gray area we had settled on, and there were many shades yet to try.
“Let me help you wit
h that.” I reached down and took his hand from my hip and pulled him into the shower. Once we were both inside, I positioned him against the head of the shower so his body would shield me from the jets. For a moment we just stood there, face to face, letting the water dance across our skin, acclimating our bodies to the shift in temperature. It did little to dampen the arousal. Quite the opposite. It seemed to ignite every cell of desire within me. As the water ran down his chest, I noticed the drops fell in intricate patterns because of his scarring. It was quite mesmerizing. It wasn’t fair. Even his scars were beautiful.
I lowered myself to my knees. My hands trailed up his legs, pausing against his hips. “Is this okay?” I asked. While this wasn’t the first time I’d given him a blow job, I wanted him to know he always had a choice to back out. His muscles clenched in anticipation of my actions, but it wasn’t until he nodded that I allowed myself to begin.
Running my hands along his thighs I positioned my mouth mere inches from him. He was standing tall, ready to be caressed. Unable to wait any longer, I ran my tongue lightly over his length, teasing him ever so gently until neither one of us could take it any longer. Desperate to taste him, I took him fully into my mouth, letting his cock press hard against my lips. The smooth yet firm contrast of him set off a chain reaction of hormones to surge with my own need. My hands wrapped around his ass for balance as I felt his hands grab fistfuls of my wet hair, guiding me up and down. I moaned around him.
I glanced up and saw he had dropped his head backward, letting his desire consume him. Picking up my rhythm, I moved expertly, increasing my timing with each thrust ever so slightly. When his hips began to rock in time with me, I knew I had hit his sweet spot. Nature was taking over. He was close. I looked up at him through the mists of the shower again and saw he was now looking intensely at me. His hands pulling harder in my hair. The longing and hunger in his gaze drove my movements faster and faster until his eyes rolled back. A deep and guttural moan escaped his lips, and then his cum burst hot against my tongue. I swallowed him down willingly before I slowly released him from my lips.
For a moment, we both remained where we were as we recovered from the exertion. Then, he reached a hand down to help me back up. He pulled me to his chest and hugged me tighter than I’d ever been hugged before. I knew at that moment, no other man would ever be able to duplicate this feeling of affection, which only made me cry. God, it is going to hurt when he moves on. Clinging to him, I was grateful to the water for hiding the tears. For that one moment, we were as close as we had ever been. I knew then I loved him, unequivocally, but more frighteningly, that I would never love another as deeply.
Leave it to my grumbling stomach to ruin such a beautiful moment.
“Someone’s hungry.” Liam chuckled in my hair.
“Guilty.” I sighed, knowing our moment was at a close. I turned away from him and busied myself with grabbing a bottle of shampoo. “Why don’t you go heat us up the leftovers from last night?”
“Burgers and fries. For breakfast?”
“Pft. Fries are basically hash browns, and cheeseburgers are like a sausage biscuit. Same-same,” I said, filling my palm with a dollop of shampoo.
“And what about the gallon of ketchup you use?”
I glared at him over my shoulder. “Tomatoes are a fruit. Hashtag science.”
He laughed. “As you wish,” he quipped. “But don’t you need…” His hand wrapped around from behind me and made his way to the edge of my pubic hairs. “Er…release?” While I desperately wanted his hands to stay right where they were, I knew he probably wasn’t quite ready for fingering. I didn’t want to push the boy too far too fast.
“What I need is fries. Go. Shoo,” I said, mushing the shampoo in my hair to give my hands something safe to do.
He let out a small exhalation, then moved his hand away and left the shower but not before giving me a look that told me he was confused about my refusal.
That made two of us.
Want more? Continue the journey HERE.
Danielle Bannister lives with her two children in Midcoast Maine along with her precious coffee pot and peppermint mocha creamer. She holds a BA in Theatre from the University of Southern Maine and her master’s degree in Literary Education from the University of Orono. When she's not on the stage, on the page, you'll find her binge-watching Netflix. As one does.
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The Twin Flames Trilogy:
Pulled, Pulled Back, and Pulled Back Again
The ABCs of Dee
The Hallowed Realms Trilogy with Amy Miles Netherworld, Hollow Earth, Isle of Glass
Short Shorts
Doppelganger
Must Love Coffee
Taking Stock
The Lurkers Within: A Havenwood Falls Novella
What Moons Do
The First 100 Kisses
The Second 100 Kisses
The First 100 Kisses: Practice Makes Perfect Page 15